Marriage Proposal and Being Fat

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Replies

  • BruinsGal_91
    BruinsGal_91 Posts: 1,400 Member
    My husband proposed at the dinner table on Christmas Day. I don't know who was more shocked. Me or the friends whose house we were at. We had pulled some Christmas crackers and his token was a plastic ring, so he decided to put it to good use. We are celebrating our 15 year wedding anniversary today.
  • keepupwithjack
    keepupwithjack Posts: 44 Member
    My husband proposed on a cold night in January with the sky full of stars. Beautiful but brrrr!

    I don't tie looking my best with my weight. I think it's important to look my best at every weight I've been. True, I look better at a lower weight but I took care of myself and did my best before losing weight too. Even at my heaviest, I styled my hair, wore makeup, tried to dress nicely, and wore perfume. I rocked it at my heaviest and I still do, 28 pounds lighter and counting!
  • ashleyjongepier
    ashleyjongepier Posts: 130 Member
    If they want to marry you, chances are they already think you look great, so no.
  • brb_2013
    brb_2013 Posts: 1,197 Member
    I did, and really talked myself out of my happiness for two weeks between our engagement and our small backyard wedding.

    Had I been able to relax I would have enjoyed it all the more. I still have those issues, but with a bigger wedding next year we are both trying to get healthy. Not just to look better but to get healthy.
  • versusveritas
    versusveritas Posts: 20 Member
    Do you feels it's important to look and feel your best when your significant other proposes marriage to you?

    How do you know when someone's about to propose to you? By the time they're on one knee it's a bit odd to go do a few push ups ;)

    Pretty sure I would feel my best, or at least feel bloody amazing, if my partner proposed marriage to commit to a life together. And honestly, I couldn't care less if he was in sweatpants and I was in pyjamas slumming on the couch.

    lol, I was proposed to while in pyjamas sitting on the couch watching tv and eating a bagel. I felt great and how I looked was literally the last thing on my mind.
  • Larissa_NY
    Larissa_NY Posts: 495 Member
    Is he holding my hair back at the time? Because that might earn him the stink-eye and a firm tabling of the discussion. Otherwise, who cares? It's not a photo op.
  • evileen99
    evileen99 Posts: 1,564 Member
    Do you feels it's important to look and feel your best when your significant other proposes marriage to you?

    How do you know when someone's about to propose to you? By the time they're on one knee it's a bit odd to go do a few push ups ;)

    Pretty sure I would feel my best, or at least feel bloody amazing, if my partner proposed marriage to commit to a life together. And honestly, I couldn't care less if he was in sweatpants and I was in pyjamas slumming on the couch.

    I was in sweatpants slumming on the couch when I got my proposal. My clothing didn't seem to matter to him.
  • chimaerandi
    chimaerandi Posts: 153 Member
    No, because to me that would be me saying "I am only worthy of my wife's love and commitment if I am thin enough" and I think that's unhealthy emotionally.

    I weighed 50 pounds more than I do now when we met. 20 pounds more than I do now when we married. I was lovely and radiant and happy at my wedding. I would have been a beautiful bride even at my original weight, because I was marrying the love of my life. Don't put your life on hold until you are 'worth' something or you are 'right' for something. Get married, take your vacation! You are worth all of that now, and you will be worth all of it thinner. Just the scale changes.
  • afatpersonwholikesfood
    afatpersonwholikesfood Posts: 577 Member
    Do you feels it's important to look and feel your best when your significant other proposes marriage to you?

    I was at my highest when I was proposed to, and I got married at my highest as well. If your significant other wants to marry you, they probably don't think you're too bad-looking.
  • allenpriest
    allenpriest Posts: 1,102 Member
    robininfl wrote: »
    No, of course not.

    Much better to be loved for who you are, then work on your body to get it how you want, right? And to work together to keep in shape for each other. Not to have some peak of fitness right at the beginning, then go downhill. Be good for each other, better together.

    I would go so far as to say any guy waiting for you to hit some perfect weight before he proposes is probably not someone you want to marry.

    Thanks for this...and I totally agree. I know he loves me for who I am and that my weight has no bearing on his love for me. I just want to feel like I'm at my best because I truly feel that he deserves it. We both deserve it.

    I've got news for you. Marriage really isn't about you or him at your best. It is more about you being at your worst and still choosing even then to stay together.
  • 12Sarah2015
    12Sarah2015 Posts: 1,117 Member
    For me I tried to lose as much weight as poss before the proposal. I went swimming everyday. He proposed sooner than I thought. I was 4kg or 9 pound overweight when he proposed. Four months later on our wedding day I was in the healthy bmi. He got the whole thing videoed.
  • Sumiblue
    Sumiblue Posts: 1,597 Member
    edited May 2016
    I was in my PJs on the couch, bed-head an all. Doesn't matter. I also had had my daughter 4 months before and was pretty heavy for me.
  • dolliesdaughter
    dolliesdaughter Posts: 544 Member
    What does one have to do with the other???
  • LKArgh
    LKArgh Posts: 5,178 Member
    To be honest, I do not understand marriage proposals. We discussed it as a couple in serious relationships and we both decided to take the next step or not. So I also cannot understand the question. Can someone know there will be a proposal and prepare for it? because thsi kind of implies it has already been agreed, so it no longer is a proposal?
  • icemom011
    icemom011 Posts: 999 Member
    How do you know when someone's about to propose to you? By the time they're on one knee it's a bit odd to go do a few push ups ;)

    Pretty sure I would feel my best, or at least feel bloody amazing, if my partner proposed marriage to commit to a life together. And honestly, I couldn't care less if he was in sweatpants and I was in pyjamas slumming on the couch. [/quote]

    Hehe, that. But really it's not important. My wife proposed on Christmas morning, and we were actually wearing our pajamas, but it was the most moving and touching moment, so it doesn't matter. By the time proposal rolls in, you've been together long enough and seen each other at best and at the worst, and still in love and committed to your SO. Trust that they love you for who you are, and everything else (like number on the scale, for example ) doesn't mean much.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I don't think there's a blanket concept of how it should or shouldn't be. Everyone is different. But if it matters to you, then its important.
  • Sumiblue
    Sumiblue Posts: 1,597 Member
    edited May 2016
    robininfl wrote: »
    No, of course not.

    Much better to be loved for who you are, then work on your body to get it how you want, right? And to work together to keep in shape for each other. Not to have some peak of fitness right at the beginning, then go downhill. Be good for each other, better together.

    I would go so far as to say any guy waiting for you to hit some perfect weight before he proposes is probably not someone you want to marry.

    Thanks for this...and I totally agree. I know he loves me for who I am and that my weight has no bearing on his love for me. I just want to feel like I'm at my best because I truly feel that he deserves it. We both deserve it.

    I've got news for you. Marriage really isn't about you or him at your best. It is more about you being at your worst and still choosing even then to stay together.

    Truth!
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    It is interesting how many have said they were in pajamas.
  • pandyg180
    pandyg180 Posts: 25 Member
    Nope! When that time comes most likely you won't know and won't necessarily be prepared regarding how you look and feel. I got engaged a few weeks ago. It was on our 5 year anniversary and we made plans to go to dinner. I wanted to look nice for our day, but of course going into it I had nothing to wear and I felt my hair and everything else was a mess. But I was looking forward to it. Not only was it an anniversary dinner but it also ended up being a surprise engagement dinner with my and my fiances families all there sharing in our special moment. I was so surprised and overwhelmed that the only thing on my mind was how perfect the proposal itself went and just excitement that the day was here. If the person in your life is planning to propose to you, they will love you no matter what. I'm sure all that is most important to them is that you will say yes!
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