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LGBT chit-chatters?

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  • pie_eyes
    pie_eyes Posts: 12,964 Member
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    A lot of disagreement and misunderstanding has been infused in this thread I'm just responding to overall previous posts
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
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    There are people in this thread who seem to lack a basic understanding of sexual orientation. Bisexuality means a person can be sexually attracted to either men or women (and of course romantic attraction often comes into play, if not moreso, as in any orientation - it frustrates the hell out of me when gay and bi people are only associated with sex, rather than love and romance as well, as if sex is the ONLY driving factor of the queer community, but I digress), it does not mean they are attracted to ALL men and women, just as straight women aren't attracted to all men and so forth. And then of course, it's a huge leap to go from attraction to sex, there are typically a lot of boundaries in place unless one is completely nondiscriminatory and willing to sleep with strangers.

    A bisexual person in a committed monogamous relationship is no more likely to cheat, be tempted or feel they are "missing out" than a person who is straight. There is no reason to question the fidelity of a bisexual person based on their orientation. I feel like this should be obvious, but I guess not.

    "Bisexual" is also not synonymous with "polyamorous," it does not mean they want more than one partner at once. (though, a bisexual person could be polyamorous, but so can a straight or gay person - the point is that there is no correlation between bisexuality and desiring multiple partners rather than one.

    Bisexuality or pansexuality does not denote promiscuity anymore than heterosexuality denotes chastity. A gay or bi person can be a virgin just like a straight person can be a nymphomaniac. Sexual orientation is based on attraction, (or a lack thereof in the case of asexuality), and that is all.

    I find it absurd that people make these connections but it's perhaps indicative of a preoccupation with stereotypes and people who've never put much thought into orientations besides their own because they are the majority.

    Well said!
  • pie_eyes
    pie_eyes Posts: 12,964 Member
    edited July 2016
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    There are people in this thread who seem to lack a basic understanding of sexual orientation. Bisexuality means a person can be sexually attracted to either men or women (and of course romantic attraction often comes into play, if not moreso, as in any orientation - it frustrates the hell out of me when gay and bi people are only associated with sex, rather than love and romance as well, as if sex is the ONLY driving factor of the queer community, but I digress), it does not mean they are attracted to ALL men and women, just as straight women aren't attracted to all men and so forth. And then of course, it's a huge leap to go from attraction to sex, there are typically a lot of boundaries in place unless one is completely nondiscriminatory and willing to sleep with strangers.

    A bisexual person in a committed monogamous relationship is no more likely to cheat, be tempted or feel they are "missing out" than a person who is straight. There is no reason to question the fidelity of a bisexual person based on their orientation. I feel like this should be obvious, but I guess not.

    "Bisexual" is also not synonymous with "polyamorous," it does not mean they want more than one partner at once. (though, a bisexual person could be polyamorous, but so can a straight or gay person - the point is that there is no correlation between bisexuality and desiring multiple partners rather than one.

    Bisexuality or pansexuality does not denote promiscuity anymore than heterosexuality denotes chastity. A gay or bi person can be a virgin just like a straight person can be a nymphomaniac. Sexual orientation is based on attraction, (or a lack thereof in the case of asexuality), and that is all.

    I find it absurd that people make these connections but it's perhaps indicative of a preoccupation with stereotypes and people who've never put much thought into orientations besides their own because they are the majority.



    I understand a straight woman I don't understand straight men to be totally honest lol

    curiosity composes me
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
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    That makes two of us, Pie...mine is snoring his straight face off upstairs!
  • pie_eyes
    pie_eyes Posts: 12,964 Member
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    That makes two of us, Pie...mine is snoring his straight face off upstairs!

    My thing is working a few extra hours, so that means extra beer for me

    I'm trying to get back to our normal routine or if this is "the new normal" for the Summer to get back to what I need to do diary wise
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
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    PM me if you need help/an ear..xo
  • pie_eyes
    pie_eyes Posts: 12,964 Member
    edited July 2016
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    <3
  • jaelynsmith
    jaelynsmith Posts: 82 Member
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    There are people in this thread who seem to lack a basic understanding of sexual orientation. Bisexuality means a person can be sexually attracted to either men or women (and of course romantic attraction often comes into play, if not moreso, as in any orientation - it frustrates the hell out of me when gay and bi people are only associated with sex, rather than love and romance as well, as if sex is the ONLY driving factor of the queer community, but I digress), it does not mean they are attracted to ALL men and women, just as straight women aren't attracted to all men and so forth. And then of course, it's a huge leap to go from attraction to sex, there are typically a lot of boundaries in place unless one is completely nondiscriminatory and willing to sleep with strangers.

    A bisexual person in a committed monogamous relationship is no more likely to cheat, be tempted or feel they are "missing out" than a person who is straight. There is no reason to question the fidelity of a bisexual person based on their orientation. I feel like this should be obvious, but I guess not.

    "Bisexual" is also not synonymous with "polyamorous," it does not mean they want more than one partner at once. (though, a bisexual person could be polyamorous, but so can a straight or gay person - the point is that there is no correlation between bisexuality and desiring multiple partners rather than one.

    Bisexuality or pansexuality does not denote promiscuity anymore than heterosexuality denotes chastity. A gay or bi person can be a virgin just like a straight person can be a nymphomaniac. Sexual orientation is based on attraction, (or a lack thereof in the case of asexuality), and that is all.

    I find it absurd that people make these connections but it's perhaps indicative of a preoccupation with stereotypes and people who've never put much thought into orientations besides their own because they are the majority.

    Yes! Thank you!! <3<3
  • CincyNeid
    CincyNeid Posts: 1,249 Member
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    CincyNeid wrote: »
    I am straight. But I honestly don't see why it's okay for a woman to wears men's clothing. But the moment a guy puts on something feminine everyone loses their everloving mind.

    What's really the difference? They're all clothes. We wear what we want and that's how it should be.

    I'm a B!


    Sorry it come across as me thread jacking. But in reply.
    As someone who lives in the MidWest it's not that simple.

    And I'll open up about it. A few years ago I was involved in a near death accident. And at that point I decided that I was going to open up and live out of the comfort box from time to time.

    With that being said I have a good friend whose sister is Female to Male Trans. In person her Sister has told me a number of times how hard it is being in the LGTB community. No one understand. No one Accepts, She gets rude comments all the time... a number of different things.

    So I set out three different times to wear items that pertains to the opposing genders wardrobe, in accordance with social norms.

    The first time I went out I put on a pair of extremely holey jeans on with Black Sheer Pantyhose under it. With a Black button up. Had on a pair of nice shoes. Very Urban Chic looking. Went to a local department store and had a woman walk up to me and basically tell me that I was the spawn of Satan for wearing something like that were kids could see me. She made me feel really really bad about it.

    The second time I wore something out I wore a Women's One Piece Swimsuit out on Myrtle Beach at like 3am in the morning. We were sitting around having a few beers after dinner, and I decided to go to one of those little swimsuit shops on the Strip and I found and bought a One Piece. Legitimately hours flew by and before I went to bed I went up and changed into the one piece and went for a walk down the beach under the moon light. About 1/2 way on my way back I had a woman stop and compliment me on my choice and asked the who/what/where/why of what I was doing and she was very sweet. Well about 3/4 of my way back some group of frat boys night fishing decided to get mouthy and started calling me names and cat calling to be complete butt holes about it.

    The third time I wore a black workout top and a tennis skirt to a TJ-Maxx and had some Holier-Than-Thou come over and chew my butt out and tell me how I was going to Hell, and being Gay was wrong. I told her I was straight and just felt like doing it. I remember she looked at me with the most pitiful eyes and said Well, sweetie, you're going to make a piss poor husband some day. .

    To say the least two of the three times I went out in something feminine I didn't have very positive experience. Now Like I said I'm in the MidWest I'm sure in SoCal, SanFran, NYC it might be a little different, but around here. The experience sucks.
  • SassyMommasaurus
    SassyMommasaurus Posts: 380 Member
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    CincyNeid wrote: »
    CincyNeid wrote: »
    I am straight. But I honestly don't see why it's okay for a woman to wears men's clothing. But the moment a guy puts on something feminine everyone loses their everloving mind.

    What's really the difference? They're all clothes. We wear what we want and that's how it should be.

    I'm a B!


    Sorry it come across as me thread jacking. But in reply.
    As someone who lives in the MidWest it's not that simple.

    And I'll open up about it. A few years ago I was involved in a near death accident. And at that point I decided that I was going to open up and live out of the comfort box from time to time.

    With that being said I have a good friend whose sister is Female to Male Trans. In person her Sister has told me a number of times how hard it is being in the LGTB community. No one understand. No one Accepts, She gets rude comments all the time... a number of different things.

    So I set out three different times to wear items that pertains to the opposing genders wardrobe, in accordance with social norms.

    The first time I went out I put on a pair of extremely holey jeans on with Black Sheer Pantyhose under it. With a Black button up. Had on a pair of nice shoes. Very Urban Chic looking. Went to a local department store and had a woman walk up to me and basically tell me that I was the spawn of Satan for wearing something like that were kids could see me. She made me feel really really bad about it.

    The second time I wore something out I wore a Women's One Piece Swimsuit out on Myrtle Beach at like 3am in the morning. We were sitting around having a few beers after dinner, and I decided to go to one of those little swimsuit shops on the Strip and I found and bought a One Piece. Legitimately hours flew by and before I went to bed I went up and changed into the one piece and went for a walk down the beach under the moon light. About 1/2 way on my way back I had a woman stop and compliment me on my choice and asked the who/what/where/why of what I was doing and she was very sweet. Well about 3/4 of my way back some group of frat boys night fishing decided to get mouthy and started calling me names and cat calling to be complete butt holes about it.

    The third time I wore a black workout top and a tennis skirt to a TJ-Maxx and had some Holier-Than-Thou come over and chew my butt out and tell me how I was going to Hell, and being Gay was wrong. I told her I was straight and just felt like doing it. I remember she looked at me with the most pitiful eyes and said Well, sweetie, you're going to make a piss poor husband some day. .

    To say the least two of the three times I went out in something feminine I didn't have very positive experience. Now Like I said I'm in the MidWest I'm sure in SoCal, SanFran, NYC it might be a little different, but around here. The experience sucks.

    First, the bold part, I seriously would of said Hail Satan and started speaking in tongues, I've had people accuse me of worshiping Satan because I'm pagan and wear a pentagram. I've done it, It's hilarious to mess with idiots like that. And I'm seriously surrounded by them. I live in the Bible Belt.

    Second, prime example on why people need to do this more and push the boundaries harder. I wish more guys would do this like you did just for the reason to push themselves out of their comfort zones and let them see how the other side is feeling.
  • pie_eyes
    pie_eyes Posts: 12,964 Member
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    CincyNeid wrote: »
    CincyNeid wrote: »
    I am straight. But I honestly don't see why it's okay for a woman to wears men's clothing. But the moment a guy puts on something feminine everyone loses their everloving mind.

    What's really the difference? They're all clothes. We wear what we want and that's how it should be.

    I'm a B!


    Sorry it come across as me thread jacking. But in reply.
    As someone who lives in the MidWest it's not that simple.

    And I'll open up about it. A few years ago I was involved in a near death accident. And at that point I decided that I was going to open up and live out of the comfort box from time to time.

    With that being said I have a good friend whose sister is Female to Male Trans. In person her Sister has told me a number of times how hard it is being in the LGTB community. No one understand. No one Accepts, She gets rude comments all the time... a number of different things.

    So I set out three different times to wear items that pertains to the opposing genders wardrobe, in accordance with social norms.

    The first time I went out I put on a pair of extremely holey jeans on with Black Sheer Pantyhose under it. With a Black button up. Had on a pair of nice shoes. Very Urban Chic looking. Went to a local department store and had a woman walk up to me and basically tell me that I was the spawn of Satan for wearing something like that were kids could see me. She made me feel really really bad about it.

    The second time I wore something out I wore a Women's One Piece Swimsuit out on Myrtle Beach at like 3am in the morning. We were sitting around having a few beers after dinner, and I decided to go to one of those little swimsuit shops on the Strip and I found and bought a One Piece. Legitimately hours flew by and before I went to bed I went up and changed into the one piece and went for a walk down the beach under the moon light. About 1/2 way on my way back I had a woman stop and compliment me on my choice and asked the who/what/where/why of what I was doing and she was very sweet. Well about 3/4 of my way back some group of frat boys night fishing decided to get mouthy and started calling me names and cat calling to be complete butt holes about it.

    The third time I wore a black workout top and a tennis skirt to a TJ-Maxx and had some Holier-Than-Thou come over and chew my butt out and tell me how I was going to Hell, and being Gay was wrong. I told her I was straight and just felt like doing it. I remember she looked at me with the most pitiful eyes and said Well, sweetie, you're going to make a piss poor husband some day. .

    To say the least two of the three times I went out in something feminine I didn't have very positive experience. Now Like I said I'm in the MidWest I'm sure in SoCal, SanFran, NYC it might be a little different, but around here. The experience sucks.

    I'm sorry :(
  • mollyfrpeters
    mollyfrpeters Posts: 2 Member
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    Hello! Bisexual in Brighton. How are you finding fitness pal?
  • ArchangelMJ
    ArchangelMJ Posts: 308 Member
    edited July 2016
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    Awesome! ^

    Exactly, I am a polymorous bi-sexual but I am not polymorous because I am bi-sexual.

    Also polymorous definition is the practice of, or desire for, intimate relationships where individuals may have more than one partner, with the knowledge and consent of all partners. It has been described as "consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy".

    Still NOT cheating. Cheating would be going behind your partners back without them knowing.

    Agreed! Thank you for expanding on polyamory. Polyamorous relationships are often seen as inferior or lumped into the "sexual deviant" field of stereotypes. Real polyamory doesn't involve weird power dynamics or abuse of any kind and all partners are consenting and open as they'd be in a healthy monogamous relationship. It's a shame that reality TV and the news have made it seem like multiple partners must belay something dark and crass. My understanding is that it's not for everyone and can be challenging, but it's certainly not bad. Polyamory and monagamy are the same in that it is the people who define the quality of relationship, not the other way around.
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
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    CincyNeid wrote: »
    I am straight. But I honestly don't see why it's okay for a woman to wears men's clothing. But the moment a guy puts on something feminine everyone loses their everloving mind.

    I think a lot of people have mis-read this. I did on the first occasion. If i've interpreted this correctly, you are saying you don't care what "gender" clothes people wear, and do not understand the fuss over men wearing ladies clothes?

    Also, I wondered how long it would take for this thread to turn nasty. I was expecting homophobia but it turns out we got us some good old fashioned Bi-bashing

    So, for those of you monosexuals mono-splaining bisexuality, here's a link you might find interesting:
    http://stillbisexual.com/

    In short, who you are in a relationship with does not define your sexuality. It's the other way around. Otherwise single people should all identify as asexual, regardless of which naked actors/actresses in GoT they are lusting after.
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
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    There are people in this thread who seem to lack a basic understanding of sexual orientation. Bisexuality means a person can be sexually attracted to either men or women (and of course romantic attraction often comes into play, if not moreso, as in any orientation - it frustrates the hell out of me when gay and bi people are only associated with sex, rather than love and romance as well, as if sex is the ONLY driving factor of the queer community, but I digress), it does not mean they are attracted to ALL men and women, just as straight women aren't attracted to all men and so forth. And then of course, it's a huge leap to go from attraction to sex, there are typically a lot of boundaries in place unless one is completely nondiscriminatory and willing to sleep with strangers.

    A bisexual person in a committed monogamous relationship is no more likely to cheat, be tempted or feel they are "missing out" than a person who is straight. There is no reason to question the fidelity of a bisexual person based on their orientation. I feel like this should be obvious, but I guess not.

    "Bisexual" is also not synonymous with "polyamorous," it does not mean they want more than one partner at once. (though, a bisexual person could be polyamorous, but so can a straight or gay person - the point is that there is no correlation between bisexuality and desiring multiple partners rather than one.

    Bisexuality or pansexuality does not denote promiscuity anymore than heterosexuality denotes chastity. A gay or bi person can be a virgin just like a straight person can be a nymphomaniac. Sexual orientation is based on attraction, (or a lack thereof in the case of asexuality), and that is all.

    I find it absurd that people make these connections but it's perhaps indicative of a preoccupation with stereotypes and people who've never put much thought into orientations besides their own because they are the majority.

    Awesome description. Only comment is to add in that some bi people are also attracted to non-binary genders, but identify as bi not pan for whatever reason. Bi as in "my gender, and not my gender" rather than bi as in "man or woman".

    (Me FYI)
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
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    ok I get that if you're in a monogomous relationship you still get to look and be attracted to other people so if youre bi that means you still look and are attracted to women even though youre with a man

    people do look whether you're straight or gay don't matter in that

    but

    if youre bi aren't you kind of giving up a part of what you need/want/definition of yourself if you choose to be monogomous

    like can you be totally satisfied with one or the other

    *runs and hides*

    Fair curiosity politely put :smile:

    For some people yes, for others no. For me, I am happy in a monogamous relationship. I don't feel like I give anything up by committing, or at least no more than I imagine monosexuals feel in "giving up" sleeping with other people.

    For others, they do feel like they are missing out. Some people need relationships with more than one person to have all their needs fulfilled. It really varies.
  • twakes80
    twakes80 Posts: 165 Member
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    Straight but totally supportive 110% of the lgbt community :)
  • 285to170
    285to170 Posts: 330 Member
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    285to170 wrote: »
    Hey all :smiley: I'm 27 bisexual woman, in a monogamous relationship with my husband of 7 years <3 let's be friends! Need some motivational friends to kick me in the A** <3

    My condolences

    WTF does that even mean?

    It was a joke. Take it how you please. MFP chitchat is not the place to roam if you're going to take everything you read seriously.