Can Men and Women be JUST Friends?

1235

Replies

  • shortmomma81
    shortmomma81 Posts: 62
    Yes, as long as you have boundaries.
  • t1nk6
    t1nk6 Posts: 215
    I think men and women can be friends, my husband thinks otherwise and thinks every man wants me. Lucky for me he is not the jealous type.

    i would listen to your husband to be honest and be wary of the male friends he mentions, they usually can tell when it comes to other mens advances. Mine used to tell me and get jealous when we first met, not that he didnt trust me just he was protecting me, but i never listened, just thought he was jealous and sure enough they would in time make a pass :P
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    What makes these threads ridiculous is that people think sex is the only line of demarcation between "just friends" and "not just friends." The reality is that the only reason a lot of so-called "just friends" aren't sleeping with each other is because one of them isn't interested. If you want to sleep with your "friend," or if he/she wants to sleep with you, cut the crap. You are not just friends.

    It's particularly hilarious to me when women feign ignorance about the fact that their male "friend" wants to get it on. If you're attractive and he's single, he probably wants to sleep with you. He's a man. It's what they do.
  • _Krys10_
    _Krys10_ Posts: 1,234 Member
    I think men and women can be friends, my husband thinks otherwise and thinks every man wants me. Lucky for me he is not the jealous type.

    i would listen to your husband to be honest and be wary of the male friends he mentions, they usually can tell when it comes to other mens advances. Mine used to tell me and get jealous when we first met, not that he didnt trust me just he was protecting me, but i never listened, just thought he was jealous and sure enough they would in time make a pass :P

    A few of mine have made comments "oh if you weren't married" and such but to me its all fun and flirting, my husband doesn't care and he does his fair share of flirting, it doesn't bother me. It doesn't mean I am going to be more than just friends with the men. I hear what you are saying though.
  • jonasmluster
    jonasmluster Posts: 8 Member
    What makes these threads ridiculous is that people think sex is the only line of demarcation between "just friends" and "not just friends." The reality is that the only reason a lot of so-called "just friends" aren't sleeping with each other is because one of them isn't interested. If you want to sleep with your "friend," or if he/she wants to sleep with you, cut the crap. You are not just friends.

    Sex isn't a line of demarcation at all. You can have sex and just be friends. Partnership or romance is so much more than thirty minutes to a few hours in the hay.
  • JewelsinBigD
    JewelsinBigD Posts: 661 Member
    For years I had male friends who I thought were just friends but in the end they did have a thing for me. I still have a few male friends but we are not close - being married for 11 years has put a lot of distance in those relationships. I have male friends at work but those are situational friendships - not true friends that I would hang out with if I left the job. When I was younger it was more common- when I was not married with kids it was more common. Now - not so much.
  • JewelsinBigD
    JewelsinBigD Posts: 661 Member
    What makes these threads ridiculous is that people think sex is the only line of demarcation between "just friends" and "not just friends." The reality is that the only reason a lot of so-called "just friends" aren't sleeping with each other is because one of them isn't interested. If you want to sleep with your "friend," or if he/she wants to sleep with you, cut the crap. You are not just friends.

    It's particularly hilarious to me when women feign ignorance about the fact that their male "friend" wants to get it on. If you're attractive and he's single, he probably wants to sleep with you. He's a man. It's what they do.
    Brilliant and True
  • charlene1873
    charlene1873 Posts: 263
    They sure can! Ive got a few male friends and it won't ever be anything more
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
    I think men and women can be friends, my husband thinks otherwise and thinks every man wants me. Lucky for me he is not the jealous type.

    i would listen to your husband to be honest and be wary of the male friends he mentions, they usually can tell when it comes to other mens advances. Mine used to tell me and get jealous when we first met, not that he didnt trust me just he was protecting me, but i never listened, just thought he was jealous and sure enough they would in time make a pass :P

    A few of mine have made comments "oh if you weren't married" and such but to me its all fun and flirting, my husband doesn't care and he does his fair share of flirting, it doesn't bother me. It doesn't mean I am going to be more than just friends with the men. I hear what you are saying though.

    "Oh, if you weren't married"

    MALE TRANSLATION - I completely could care less that you are married and would do you at any given moment, but I am saying it this way to "offiicially" let you know I am working it, but to come off as sensitive to your marriage. Let me repeat, I would do this NOW NOW NOW right in front of your husband and do not in any way care that you are married..... but if I said that I would sound creepy.
  • _Krys10_
    _Krys10_ Posts: 1,234 Member
    I think men and women can be friends, my husband thinks otherwise and thinks every man wants me. Lucky for me he is not the jealous type.

    i would listen to your husband to be honest and be wary of the male friends he mentions, they usually can tell when it comes to other mens advances. Mine used to tell me and get jealous when we first met, not that he didnt trust me just he was protecting me, but i never listened, just thought he was jealous and sure enough they would in time make a pass :P

    A few of mine have made comments "oh if you weren't married" and such but to me its all fun and flirting, my husband doesn't care and he does his fair share of flirting, it doesn't bother me. It doesn't mean I am going to be more than just friends with the men. I hear what you are saying though.

    "Oh, if you weren't married"

    MALE TRANSLATION - I completely could care less that you are married and would do you at any given moment, but I am saying it this way to "offiicially" let you know I am working it, but to come off as sensitive to your marriage. Let me repeat, I would do this NOW NOW NOW right in front of your husband and do not in any way care that you are married..... but if I said that I would sound creepy.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • kellyskitties
    kellyskitties Posts: 475 Member
    When we got married we both had friends of the opposite sex. I still have some of mine. His happened to move away and lose touch. The ones we lost, we would have lost through the natural cycle of friendship anyway. One of my best male friends - still is - actually started coming over to see him! I said, wait a min, you are MY friend - we all thought it was funny. They have grease monkey stuff in common so they bonded over cars. Another of my male friends doesn't see him much, but they are happy to talk to each other - they are very like minded people. Would I "do" any of them - um, no. Have I had any hot enough to do - yes. Would I want to? No. Did they want to - never knew. Do his - well, one did. But I think she freaked him out a little - she was a strange bird so to say and he told me he was freaked out by her. I actually did not like her - she was selfcentered and overbearing piece of work. She thought I was jealous of her - DH and I found that pretty funny. Um, not jealous - it's just that hanging with you - makes me want to eat nails. She's one that just moved away. We both celebrated that one. She probably thinks we miss her to this day LOL

    I think, because we are in a solid supportive relationship without much jealousy it works fine. We are each others biggest cheerleaders and smallest critics. We've never even had a fight. If I saw him talking to a gorgeous woman somewhere that I didn't know I would assume he was trying to help her sell her car or some similar thing. So the lack of jealousy and high level of trust - makes all the difference in the world.

    And can I have male friends and not bang them - personally - um, yes. I know their bad sides and one of them is gay. So yes. I know them too well. And when I was younger it was the same way. Maybe I just don't have the wild gene - just the fun gene?
  • littlepinkhearts
    littlepinkhearts Posts: 1,055 Member
    of course there are exceptions to every rule....but the real answer is NO....just NO and NO and always NO

    well, i would even wonder about the "exceptions"
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
    I'm bisexual. Does that mean I can't have any friends and I have to bang them all?

    Forever alone and a slut.
    HI!!! You wanna be my "friend"?
    tumblr_moitg2hWRT1s14kb7o1_500.gif
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    No. Heck even guys are tough to be friends with. I just wanna sleep with everyone.

    ffs.
  • youcantfoolme
    youcantfoolme Posts: 79 Member
    Sure, as long as everyone concerned are secure enough in their own relationships and won't be jealous.
  • Icelandic_Saga
    Icelandic_Saga Posts: 2,926 Member
    Hmmmmm. I'm gonna go with a rare possibility. But probly not
  • Hexahedra
    Hexahedra Posts: 894 Member
    Because the question starts with 'can', then the answer is yes.

    Now I'm going to break the question down. All else being equal:
    1. If a man finds you attractive and you're single, would friendship stop him from trying to get in your panties? No
    2. If a man finds you attractive and you're not single, would that stop him from trying to sleep with you? Depends
    3. If you simply want to remain friends despite his attraction, would he do it? Depends
    4. If a man doesn't find you attractive, would he stay to be your friend? Yes
  • katbirdinpa
    katbirdinpa Posts: 105
    of course men and women can have platonic friend relationships. I have a ton of them :laugh:
  • liormintz
    liormintz Posts: 150 Member
    Of course they can be just friends ...take me and my wife for example ..lol
  • pennelope515
    pennelope515 Posts: 369
    Yes.


    Almost all my friends are guys
  • AshleyM71
    AshleyM71 Posts: 3,029 Member
    Yes. Have some cool male friends. I do think there will always be some sexual tension between men and women...that's just how our brains and bodies work.
  • Fiercely_Me
    Fiercely_Me Posts: 481 Member
    Men and women can be just friends, but there is always a level of attraction between the two. Whether they act on that attraction is where the problem can come about if a person is in a relationship with someone else. I don't mine if I'm with someone who has female friends, but when he spends more time with them (confiding in, or hanging out with) more than me it poses a problem.You should not be spending more time with your girl friend more than your girlfriend.
  • jayjay12345654321
    jayjay12345654321 Posts: 653 Member
    Absolutely! As long as the guy is ugly and the girl would never have sex with him.

    On a serious note, 3 years ago I watched 60 Minutes special that analyzed 3 married couples and the "experts" picked out which ones they thought would end up in divorce. All 4 experts picked the couple where the stay at home mom had become best friends with the stay at home dad next door to end up in divorce because she was getting her emotional needs met outside of her husband. They also picked the couple where the wife was sleeping in another bedroom with the baby and had refused to have sex with her husband for over a year because she said she was too tired. The third couple was this gorgeous model who was married to an older, heavyset, balding man and all of the experts said they had the best chance of staying together because he doted on her, cared about her day at work, and showed her affection by continuing to "date" her long after they were married. She had no interest in the hot male models she worked with on a daily basis because her husband was so devoted to her.

    That's how the show went. I have no idea if any of the experts were right. If there was a follow-up, I missed it. But I do know my good looking ex-boyfriend is my best friend and my ex-fiance's jealousy over our friendship tore us apart even though he lives in alaska and i live in texas and we haven't seen each other in 5 years. so i think it has a lot to do with each person's insecurities.
  • pennelope515
    pennelope515 Posts: 369
    Absolutely! As long as the guy is ugly and the girl would never have sex with him.



    hahahahahahahahaaaaa:laugh:
  • ShadeyC
    ShadeyC Posts: 315 Member
    I read page 1 and page 6...Oddly enough page 1 says yes predominantly and page 6 says no...
    Weird.
    I'm going with yes. My best friends are guys. I would however say it's because we've known each other FOREVER and have a healthy respect for NOT TRYING TO GET IN EACH OTHERS PANTS.
  • JaxDemon
    JaxDemon Posts: 403 Member
    Dunno I don't have any female friends in my life to comment lol

    Any takers for a male friend? lol
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    Nope. I even send my gay friends not gay.
  • ohsnapitssummer
    ohsnapitssummer Posts: 581 Member
    Absofreakinglutely. I honestly don't understand how this is a controversial question. In my opionion, you can have attractive friends but not be attracted to them. Attractive and attraction are two different things.
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    deleting!
  • 123tryingtobefree
    123tryingtobefree Posts: 328
    All my best friends are males. And they are 4 of them. One is my MAIN best friend that we share everything and the others are just my mates you know. There is sexual attraction now and then with one of them but no big deal about it and we never ruin the nice way we support each other.

Categories