Support from significant other...

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  • ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken Posts: 1,530 Member
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    Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »
    I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!

    Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.

    This is slightly off topic, but bookmark this: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/profile/comments/ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken

    Then you can easily see all the threads you're participating in.

    Sorry he's a jerk.

    Thank you! I appreciate that. I am kind of a brain donor and I also get too many irons in the fire bouncing around the site that I forget to look for these features. Thanks again!
  • ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken Posts: 1,530 Member
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    AllSpiceNice wrote: »
    My husband is the same...it is sad. I do this for myself and for my son.

    You are not alone. You can do this and I believe in you! :-)
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »
    My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.

    Thank you! I think I have been looking at it all wrong. I could use it to fuel me instead of defeat me. Time to change how I see it!
  • darciew2
    darciew2 Posts: 50 Member
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    My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    edited September 2016
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    darciew2 wrote: »
    My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.

    I think we use the word "sabotage" differently. To me, offering someone ice cream isn't sabotage. It's perhaps not very thoughtful, but it's not sabotage.
  • ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken Posts: 1,530 Member
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    darciew2 wrote: »
    My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.

    This makes me angry to hear. I am sorry that he does that to you. You are a human being and likely are prone to moments of weakness. Maybe next time he offers you ice cream just grit your teeth and walk away. Maybe head to the store for something that is within your allowance. Maybe one of those little single serve cups? I sometimes get one of those if I am having a PMS kind of day and just can't hold back any longer. I hope he comes around and stops doing that to you either way.
  • rebaisett
    rebaisett Posts: 62 Member
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    darciew2 wrote: »
    My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.
    Is he jealous of your accomplishments?
  • divcara
    divcara Posts: 357 Member
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    The only thing he really said when I first set out to lose a lot of weight (over 60lbs), was that I didnt need to do anything, but if I wanted to, he would support, but didn't want to police me. He said, "You're an adult. If you want a cookie, have a cookie. But then I don't want to hear about it that you're so bad for eating a cookie." I could appreciate that. I think the only fight we really had about food was the day he threw out my cookie butter. To be fair, I had already thrown a half empty jar in the trash. He took out the trash. I went back for it (yeah, I'm gross, but it was in a closed jar and...it's cookie butter!!). And the trash was gone and a fresh bag in. I started screaming that he threw out my cookie butter. He was staring at me like huh?? and like I was crazy and said, "But it was in the trash??" I screamed, "But it's cookie butter, of course I'm going to go back for it." And he was like, "yeah, you're a freakin psycho" but I may have deserved that one.

    But overall, he kind of lets me just do my thing with this. I'm sure I annoy him at times how I have to weigh everything before I cook it, but he rolls with it. And there are some things I don't normally have, but if he uses regular cooking spray instead of coconut oil spray, or not organic eggs, it's not like I'm not going to eat it. I have him pretty trained - he will text me nutrition labels at the grocery store asking if something is okay to buy, but even if he comes home with something not ideal, I still get thrilled he tries so hard.

    I feel like in a lot of ways a healthier lifestyle has brought us closer together because now we take walks together and go on vacations where we can go hiking or ride bikes, and just make a point to do more active things than just eating out and drinking.
  • essbanga
    essbanga Posts: 6 Member
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    My boyfriend is fairly encouraging. We both have different goals, I want to lose and he wants to gain, so I often feel like we but head when it comes to meals when we eat out. It was his birthday the other day, and we went out for food, food that I should not have been eating but was great for him and his gaining mission. I caved and instead of normal portions I ate everything on my plate. It was a real eye opener. We had a talk last night, I didn't mean to put blame on him or make him feel bad because it was my decision to eat all the food. He felt guilty for throwing temptations in my face and yeah. We're working on it, we just need to find a healthy balance for the both of us that works ?
  • rebaisett
    rebaisett Posts: 62 Member
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    Sweet_Heresy wrote: »
    My boyfriend is very supportive. I took him to the gym with me when I first started lifting (he used to be a PT), and he showed me how to do all the compound lifts...we don't get to go together much anymore cause of our schedules, but having somebody in it with me keeps me motivated nonetheless.

    I'm also into BJJ and Muay Thai, and hope to fight MMA someday...and he thinks it's awesome and doesn't judge me at all for sinking all this time and money into getting punched in the face for fun. Lol.

    I'm pretty lucky. :tongue:

    Pretty awesome
  • gothchiq
    gothchiq Posts: 4,598 Member
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    My husband is supportive. He is struggling with weight loss and appetite himself and I am trying to help him. He sabotages himself a lot and refuses to log but at least I can get him to the gym with me. He has lost a few lb. I lost 40 lb. He weighs 300 and his ideal weight would be 225 according to the doctor. Yes, he has a body like a tank lol. He wants me to be in my best health. I want him to be in his best health. We are both prediabetic, my A1C is worse than his. I also take Lipitor for hyperlipidemia. His cholesterol is just a touch high but could be controlled with proper diet. Mine's an issue of liver overproducing cholesterol. I do know he finds me more attractive with the weight off so I'm sure that is also a factor in his supporting my keeping the weight off and staying fit. I'm teaching him how to put together healthy work lunches. He's learning to cook healthy dinners. It's a joint effort.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    My husband is extremely supportive. He knows how beneficial health and fitness are to my life, health, mental and emotional well-being, happiness, confidence, career (dance). Plus he enjoys me fit. And he also helps me not be so hard on myself.
  • BrokeBirkin
    BrokeBirkin Posts: 73 Member
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    My bf has always supported me with losing weight but refused to join in and he's finally doing it! I still feel kind of alone because he works graveyard and we only get to see each other for a very short period of time during the day. I have to do all the cooking but honestly whatever I can do to support him as well.
  • rebaisett
    rebaisett Posts: 62 Member
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    BrokeBirkin wrote: »
    My bf has always supported me with losing weight but refused to join in and he's finally doing it! I still feel kind of alone because he works graveyard and we only get to see each other for a very short period of time during the day. I have to do all the cooking but honestly whatever I can do to support him as well.

    That would be hard being on different shifts. So glad to see that you are making it work :)

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