Ladies, would you date a guy who dislikes gay people?
Replies
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Uh-oh.
eta: biting my tongue in half0 -
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Not liking someone for superficial reasons is a sure sign of immaturity. If he does this, there are probably more aspects of life that he is going to be really immature about also...so, as a straight dude who has no problem at all with gay dudes (I even have 2 or 3 that I hang out with and they are some of the best people in the world) I would say run from this guy. He's not grown up enough.2
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I won't let my own family disrespect people based on sexual orientation, forget some random guy1
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KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »Just because you don't agree with one's sexual preference (or political views or religion) doesn't mean you can't respect, love and have a personal relationship with them.
Political views/religion are world views that we choose and/or can change. Some of my friends were simply born gay...they can't simply choose to be straight.
Personally, I wouldn't have a "personal relationship" with someone who didn't "agree" with such a central aspect of who I am.
Maybe if they were immediate family, then I'd muscle through... But just for friends, there are enough people in the world, that I'd rather have my "personal relationships" be with people who don't "disagree" with how I was born. Just a personal preference though... I'm picky about who I'm close with.
Did I use the wrong words? Thanks for highlighting words you felt I said that offended you apparently. I didn't say anyone CHOSE to be gay, I would never say that nor do I believe that. I'm saying, people can be different and be friends. It's really as simple as that. If people choose to segregate themselves with people that only believe how they do then that's on them. I choose not to do that.
My philosophy: You do you, I'll do me.
You didn't offend me, babe. No worries. Just bc someone disagrees with you or engages you in conversation, doesn't mean they were offended by you.
My purpose in highlighting that sexual orientation is not a choice, is to demonstrate how it is not on the same level to me as the other examples you gave: political views/religion. I could be friends w/ someone who didn't agree with my political or religious views. But the way I was born...that would be harder for me. Just pointing out that difference.
But yes... You do you, I'll do me
...Or we can all do each other....errr7 -
PowerMan40 wrote: »He is secretly gay himself and not comfortable with the idea.... ]
[Think about how uncomfortable family gatherings will be, ? and the drama is not worth it.
Can you imagine the scene if he showed up to a family dinner wearing the same shirt as someone else?
The Horror.1 -
KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »Just because you don't agree with one's sexual preference (or political views or religion) doesn't mean you can't respect, love and have a personal relationship with them.
Political views/religion are world views that we choose and/or can change. Some of my friends were simply born gay...they can't simply choose to be straight.
Personally, I wouldn't have a "personal relationship" with someone who didn't "agree" with such a central aspect of who I am.
Maybe if they were immediate family, then I'd muscle through... But just for friends, there are enough people in the world, that I'd rather have my "personal relationships" be with people who don't "disagree" with how I was born. Just a personal preference though... I'm picky about who I'm close with.
Did I use the wrong words? Thanks for highlighting words you felt I said that offended you apparently. I didn't say anyone CHOSE to be gay, I would never say that nor do I believe that. I'm saying, people can be different and be friends. It's really as simple as that. If people choose to segregate themselves with people that only believe how they do then that's on them. I choose not to do that.
My philosophy: You do you, I'll do me.
You didn't offend me, babe. No worries. Just bc someone disagrees with your or engages you in conversation, doesn't mean they were offended by you.
My purpose in highlighting that sexual orientation is not a choice, it to demonstrate how it is not on the same level to me as political views/religion. I could be friends w/ someone who didn't agree with my political or religious views. But the way I was born...that wold be harder for me. Just pointing out that difference.
But yes... You do you, I'll do
...Or we can all do each other....errr
Just wanted to make it clear that I do NOT believe that way based on the word "preference", but I can see how that could be considered "choice" vs someone being born that way.
I love errbody!1 -
Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true7 -
Deal breaker
I would never date somebody and narrow minded as that
Secondly that is a red flag - of he does not want to be in the same room as gay people the next step could well be trying to stop you from seeing your best friend and brother because of his discomfort.
Either he tries to become part of your world with gay people and gets to know these people that are so important to you or I'd say open the door and shove him out
Remember you mention 3 people very important to you. That should be enough to say - Dud you ain't worth my time.2 -
Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
Oh yeah?
Well now, if Diana Ross is so fabulous, then how much can she bench press?
I reckon we have different criteria when it comes to fabulous. ...0 -
Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
Oh so there's not going to be a hair pulling mud rolling fight?KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »Just because you don't agree with one's sexual preference (or political views or religion) doesn't mean you can't respect, love and have a personal relationship with them.
Political views/religion are world views that we choose and/or can change. Some of my friends were simply born gay...they can't simply choose to be straight.
Personally, I wouldn't have a "personal relationship" with someone who didn't "agree" with such a central aspect of who I am.
Maybe if they were immediate family, then I'd muscle through... But just for friends, there are enough people in the world, that I'd rather have my "personal relationships" be with people who don't "disagree" with how I was born. Just a personal preference though... I'm picky about who I'm close with.
Did I use the wrong words? Thanks for highlighting words you felt I said that offended you apparently. I didn't say anyone CHOSE to be gay, I would never say that nor do I believe that. I'm saying, people can be different and be friends. It's really as simple as that. If people choose to segregate themselves with people that only believe how they do then that's on them. I choose not to do that.
My philosophy: You do you, I'll do me.
You didn't offend me, babe. No worries. Just bc someone disagrees with your or engages you in conversation, doesn't mean they were offended by you.
My purpose in highlighting that sexual orientation is not a choice, it to demonstrate how it is not on the same level to me as political views/religion. I could be friends w/ someone who didn't agree with my political or religious views. But the way I was born...that wold be harder for me. Just pointing out that difference.
But yes... You do you, I'll do
...Or we can all do each other....errr
Just wanted to make it clear that I do NOT believe that way based on the word "preference", but I can see how that could be considered "choice" vs someone being born that way.
I love errbody!
Lies, I'm always down for that.2 -
KrazyDaizy wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
Oh so there's not going to be a hair pulling mud rolling fight?KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »KrazyDaizy wrote: »Just because you don't agree with one's sexual preference (or political views or religion) doesn't mean you can't respect, love and have a personal relationship with them.
Political views/religion are world views that we choose and/or can change. Some of my friends were simply born gay...they can't simply choose to be straight.
Personally, I wouldn't have a "personal relationship" with someone who didn't "agree" with such a central aspect of who I am.
Maybe if they were immediate family, then I'd muscle through... But just for friends, there are enough people in the world, that I'd rather have my "personal relationships" be with people who don't "disagree" with how I was born. Just a personal preference though... I'm picky about who I'm close with.
Did I use the wrong words? Thanks for highlighting words you felt I said that offended you apparently. I didn't say anyone CHOSE to be gay, I would never say that nor do I believe that. I'm saying, people can be different and be friends. It's really as simple as that. If people choose to segregate themselves with people that only believe how they do then that's on them. I choose not to do that.
My philosophy: You do you, I'll do me.
You didn't offend me, babe. No worries. Just bc someone disagrees with your or engages you in conversation, doesn't mean they were offended by you.
My purpose in highlighting that sexual orientation is not a choice, it to demonstrate how it is not on the same level to me as political views/religion. I could be friends w/ someone who didn't agree with my political or religious views. But the way I was born...that wold be harder for me. Just pointing out that difference.
But yes... You do you, I'll do
...Or we can all do each other....errr
Just wanted to make it clear that I do NOT believe that way based on the word "preference", but I can see how that could be considered "choice" vs someone being born that way.
I love errbody!
Lies, I'm always down for that.
Me too
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Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
You have impeccable taste0 -
Yes, deal breaker for me. I have no time for bigotry in my life.3
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Motorsheen wrote: »Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
Oh yeah?
Well now, if Diana Ross is so fabulous, then how much can she bench press?
I reckon we have different criteria when it comes to fabulous. ...
who cares?
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and to answer the question total deal breaker. Dump him0
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No. if he issues with gay people what are his views of people of other race, religion, etc... things that might be different from him and his views???? This is the beginning to see his true soul.0
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I guess for some of us, there are limitations when it comes to choosing to associate with people who don't agree with all our beliefs. For many, homophobia and racism are always deal-breakers. Sometimes people believe that "doing you" can contribute to hatred, discrimination, dehumanization, and worse, and so aren't okay with people "doing" racism and homophobia anywhere, for any reason. Some people believe in fact that it's their duty to work toward achieving social justice for marginalized groups through active, critical, conscientious decision-making.2
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Motorsheen wrote: »Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
Oh yeah?
Well now, if Diana Ross is so fabulous, then how much can she bench press?
I reckon we have different criteria when it comes to fabulous. ...
who cares?
Who cares? !? !
Isn't this how we judge a person's potential worth to society?
... Eh?
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Motorsheen wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
Oh yeah?
Well now, if Diana Ross is so fabulous, then how much can she bench press?
I reckon we have different criteria when it comes to fabulous. ...
who cares?
Who cares? !? !
Isn't this how we judge a person's potential worth to society?
... Eh?
you do you buddy
(but you're wrong)0 -
Total deal breaker, and I don't have any gay family.
And it's one thing to be "uncomfortable" around gay people (my husband was here once, he just didn't know many out gay people when he was younger), but it's another to "disprove of the gay lifestyle" and not want to be in the same room.1 -
Love the sinner, hate the sin. I'm no better than anyone else, my sins are not any better or worse than anyone else's - I have no right to judge. Those are my beliefs. I don't know what the OP's boyfriend's beliefs are but if he claims to be Christian and that's his reason for hating anyone based on anything, he needs to be reminded what a Christian is.
Either way, OP, he is obviously not compatible with you and you need to move on.3 -
If he disliked specific gay people because they're jerks, sure...it has nothing to do with them being gay. If he disliked them solely because they're gay, NOPE!0
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Motorsheen wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »Karb_Kween wrote: »Motorsheen wrote: »I could never be gay.
.... I simply don't find Diana Ross to be all that fabulous.
Well she is
And so is Cher, Madonna, Bette Midler.... the stereotypes are beyond true
Oh yeah?
Well now, if Diana Ross is so fabulous, then how much can she bench press?
I reckon we have different criteria when it comes to fabulous. ...
who cares?
Who cares? !? !
Isn't this how we judge a person's potential worth to society?
... Eh?
you do you buddy
(but you're wrong)
C'mon now. ...
I said "potential".0 -
tl:dr Deal breaker, no telling what else he takes issue with. Save your time.3
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bemyyfriend0918 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »Doesn't want to be in the same room. Definitely in the closet. In fact, many homophobic men fall into the sexually insecure category and have personal gay proclivities.
These were my thoughts also! I've dated other men who had no problem with my brother and his fiancé, and in fact enjoyed it when we would all hang out. Something doesn't seem right.
^^^^ That bold quoted text right there says it all. You should end that and go with your gut feeling. To dislike someone for being gay is pretty sad. It's like disliking someone because they like cheeseburgers.
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People can believe what they want, but I can't imagine being in a relationship of any kind with someone who spends so much time worrying about things that don't involve them at all.2
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One word: NEXT!
You're only 25...plenty of time to find someone else.
Good luck!1 -
I was hit on by a drunk guy. I was made as heck. But now I just don't care I'm comfortable in knowing I like women. I've learned to accept people for who they are.. I say tell your boy friend up front. Then it's up to him accept or run2
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KrazyDaizy wrote: »I wouldn't date ANYONE who didn't want to be in the same room with someone based on race, sex, sexual preference, religion etc. That's not ok. I think that makes them a POS.
Just because you don't agree with one's sexual preference (or political views or religion) doesn't mean you can't respect, love and have a personal relationship with them. That's ridiculous and makes the person who can't have a relationship with someone different than them a total *kitten*.
What if the persons religion is Lucifarian Satanisim and they frequently participate in human sacrifice rituals and baby breeding to please their gods?1
This discussion has been closed.
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