Ladies, would you date a guy who dislikes gay people?

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Replies

  • FarmerCarla
    FarmerCarla Posts: 470 Member
    Don't judge people just because their sins are different from yours. On the other hand, don't condone sin and call it good. There's a lot of Biblical truth in the saying, "Love the sinner, hate the sin." Only God can makes hearts obedient to His Word, and He only changes our hearts when we seek His will and ask for His help. I pray you and your boyfriend, both, will do that.
  • _BrewingAZ_
    _BrewingAZ_ Posts: 252 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    I had a very close friend tell me that he was gay.

    My reaction?

    I told him that I was shocked, Shocked I tell you!
    (In the most possible sarcastic tone imaginable .)

    I told him, I don't care; you can date a chicken taco if you want....

    Just don't ask me to pay for the wedding.

    I would date a chicken taco because chicken tacos are amazing.
  • Karb_Kween
    Karb_Kween Posts: 2,681 Member
    jenmar22 wrote: »
    This prolly isn't going to be a very popular post :joy:....

    But "love the sinner", in reference to being gay, is just never going to sound like a very "loving" phrase to me :joy:

    And strangely enough, my gay friends have never been won over by this one either

    Thats exactly what I was thinking, that's the new way of saying "Kill em with kindness" I guess
  • lindagrimm904
    lindagrimm904 Posts: 87 Member
    I ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT! My DS is Gay! All His friends are Gay! I've met them & they are a hoot! I hope everyone
    has a Fantastic & Blessed Friday! Linda! :):p
  • wanzik
    wanzik Posts: 326 Member
    jenmar22 wrote: »
    This prolly isn't going to be a very popular post :joy:....

    But "love the sinner", in reference to being gay, is just never going to sound like a very "loving" phrase to me :joy:

    And strangely enough, my gay friends have never been won over by this one either

    That's just because people tend to get defensive instead of just taking it for what it is. Taken in context with everything else I said, it should be just fine.

    I'm more annoyed by "prolly" when you mean "probably." LOL! :tongue:
  • Karb_Kween
    Karb_Kween Posts: 2,681 Member
    lindagrimm904 wrote: »
    I ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT! My DS is Gay! All His friends are Gay! I've met them & they are a hoot! I hope everyone
    has a Fantastic & Blessed Friday! Linda! :):p

    I need some digits
  • jenmar222
    jenmar222 Posts: 9,271 Member
    edited December 2016
    wanzik wrote: »
    That's just because people tend to get defensive instead of just taking it for what it is. Taken in context with everything else I said, it should be just fine.

    I'm more annoyed by "prolly" when you mean "probably." LOL! :tongue:

    Wasn't referring to your particular post, just the use of that phrase in general :smile:

    And again, not offended or defensive...just engaging/conversational. Productive/respectful conversation is a good thing...we should all do more of it. Just offering another perspective on that often-used phrase.
  • wanzik
    wanzik Posts: 326 Member
    jenmar22 wrote: »
    wanzik wrote: »
    That's just because people tend to get defensive instead of just taking it for what it is. Taken in context with everything else I said, it should be just fine.

    I'm more annoyed by "prolly" when you mean "probably." LOL! :tongue:

    Wasn't referring to your particular post, just the use of that phrase in general :smile:

    And again, not offended or defensive...just engaging/conversational. Productive/respectful conversation is a good thing. Just offering another perspective on that often-used phrase.

    I get you, and I appreciate your comments and tone. :smile:

    I pretty much tried to walk the line one the OP's question, but I don't want to take the entire thread off the rails and down that other road. I know the rules. I think we can agree on the subject because I think we both gave the OP the same advice - to dump him. IF her boyfriend is (or claims to be Christian) maybe she can use my comments to give him something to think about before she walks. If that's not his reason then I don't know...
  • Flapjack_Mollases
    Flapjack_Mollases Posts: 218 Member
    PlanetVelma wrote: »
    jenmar22 wrote: »
    This prolly isn't going to be a very popular post :joy:....

    But "love the sinner", in reference to being gay, is just never going to sound like a very "loving" phrase to me :joy:

    And strangely enough, my gay friends have never been won over by this one either

    I think the whole "love the sinner, hate the sin" is completely judgmental & passive aggressive. I also find it curious that this is commonly used in the context of homosexuality. Is this used when someone kills their spouse? How about if they commit assault? Adultery? Not honoring thy mother & father?

    And hey - if someone doesn't like the "gay lifestyle" then don't enter into a gay relationship.

    You generally only here this in reference to gay people because right now that is the social issue of our time. I feel the same about all sin. That's doesn't mean that I'm infallible. But to answer your question, Do you know how many of the people you love today have done things to dishonor their father and mother? Do you still love these people? Would you agree that they probably shouldn't have done things to dishonor their mother and father? There you go. Just because someone does something that you consider a sin, doesn't mean you can't love them. And it's not passive aggressive at all. What you are simply saying (in a round a bout way) is that it's not your place to judge, and you love them for the person they are.
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,368 Member
    @Motorsheen wrote: »
    I had a very close friend tell me that he was gay.

    My reaction?

    I told him that I was shocked, Shocked I tell you!
    (In the most possible sarcastic tone imaginable .)

    I told him, I don't care; you can date a chicken taco if you want....

    Just don't ask me to pay for the wedding.

    But what about it it were a beef taco? Still tolerant?

    And begs the question if the partook in taco Tuesday would that be cannibalism
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    _unsteady_ wrote: »
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    I hada very close friend tell me that he was gay.

    My reaction?

    I told him that I was shocked, Shocked I tell you!
    (In the most possible sarcastic tone imaginable .)

    I told him, I don't care; you can date a chicken taco if you want....

    Just don't ask me to pay for the wedding.

    Is it coz he was gay?

    Haha... that's funny

    He's still a friend
    Always has been and always will be.

    Last year for Christmas he gave me the autobiography of Carly Simon.

    ( Carly Simon? Wtf?)

    I said: Thanks.... ?

    He replied: Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking; return it for the Iggy Pop biography if you want.
  • wanzik
    wanzik Posts: 326 Member
    NorthCascades wrote: »
    Flapjack_Mollases wrote: »
    Just because someone does something that you consider a sin, doesn't mean you can't love them. And it's not passive aggressive at all. What you are simply saying (in a round a bout way) is that it's not your place to judge, and you love them for the person they are.

    If it's not our place to judge, then why do we have to call them sinners?

    How about this as an alternative? "I don't have a problem with gay people."

    I had a brilliant answer to this. :smiley: But as I said, I'm not taking this thread down that road. :innocent:
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    bemyyfriend0918 wrote: »
    So my question is this. My closest friend is a gay male. My brother is also gay and has a wonderful fiancé who I absolutely adore. We hang out often and usually do things together as a group. The guy ive been seeing says he doesn't approve of a gay lifestyle and doesn't even want to be in the same room with them because of this. Im thinking this is a deal breaker, but I was wondering if anyone had a similar experience? Im guessing there isn't a way to change his mind.

    Is it really common still in modern society for Strait males to feel uncomfortable around gays? I didn't even think people still thought like that! People are people to me, regardless of orientation.

    Not a lady, but it would be a deal breaker for me. Disliking someone because of race or sexual orientation or whatever and not wanting to be in the same room, etc is extremely small minded which would indicate that they're probably rather small minded in other areas which means our conversations would probably be rather dull.

    Beyond that, I'm personally of the opinion that someone who really doesn't want to be in the same room as gays is probably a closet homosexual...a strait person really isn't going to be concerned about someone's gayness rubbing off on them or whatever...

  • ejbronte
    ejbronte Posts: 867 Member
    It's interesting to me that he uses the phrase "gay lifestyle": there really is no such thing, any more than there's a "straight lifestyle". All kinds of people of all kinds of sexual orientation have all manner of lifestyles.

    So, to begin with, he is likely trapped in a preconceived notion of "how gay people live".

    If nothing else, it indicates that he has a tendency to pigeon-hole; there can be lots of pigeon-holes he hasn't expressed himself about yet. It's something we're all subject to, I think. The question is whether the person is willing to think outside this sort of bubble. If yes, then that's a good thing. If no, then I would be very leery of him, because it's likely you yourself will be (or already are) pigeon-holed in his consideration.
  • Flapjack_Mollases
    Flapjack_Mollases Posts: 218 Member
    NorthCascades wrote: »
    Flapjack_Mollases wrote: »
    Just because someone does something that you consider a sin, doesn't mean you can't love them. And it's not passive aggressive at all. What you are simply saying (in a round a bout way) is that it's not your place to judge, and you love them for the person they are.

    If it's not our place to judge, then why do we have to call them sinners?

    How about this as an alternative? "I don't have a problem with gay people."

    I agree with you 100%. We all sin, so calling someone on their sin is both pointless and redundant. Just for the record, I don't use that phrase. I was just trying to help explain why it is used. Even as a Christian, I find the phrase to be borderline cringe-worthy. But again, I was just trying to help explain the reasoning behind it. I couldn't agree more. And if someone asked me if I had a problem with gay people, I wouldn't go into this long diatribe about, "well, you know the Bible....." I would just say. No, every man/woman has the right to live their life as they see fit. And I would leave it at that.
  • MrStabbems
    MrStabbems Posts: 3,110 Member
    that sounds full on old testament lol, guy would have you washing dishes, cooking, cleaning, baking and baby making. Modern life requires tolerance because we crowed as feck.

    so you have two solutions, both in agree with.

    Kill like 4.6 billion peeps so we can spread out and require less tolerance.

    Ditch the insecure intolerant poopy head
  • Karb_Kween
    Karb_Kween Posts: 2,681 Member
    Oh I thought this disappeared
  • k8eekins
    k8eekins Posts: 2,264 Member
    bemyyfriend0918 wrote: »
    So my question is this. My closest friend is a gay male. My brother is also gay and has a wonderful fiancé who I absolutely adore. We hang out often and usually do things together as a group. The guy ive been seeing says he doesn't approve of a gay lifestyle and doesn't even want to be in the same room with them because of this. Im thinking this is a deal breaker, but I was wondering if anyone had a similar experience? Im guessing there isn't a way to change his mind.

    Is it really common still in modern society for Strait males to feel uncomfortable around gays? I didn't even think people still thought like that! People are people to me, regardless of orientation.

    From my vantage point, this is a deal-breaker@your closest friend + your brother & his fiance VS man you're seeing.

    Personally my only experience was through my betrothal to a man who was known to have been a bisexual with his longtime steady - the mother of his 2 children@modern society. I'd opted out (left for America) not because of his sexuality but for the sake of his established family unit; His eldest was in his early teens, I was 19.

    When a man protests too much .... You can't change his mind.

  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,968 Member
    Flapjack_Mollases wrote: »
    NorthCascades wrote: »
    Flapjack_Mollases wrote: »
    Just because someone does something that you consider a sin, doesn't mean you can't love them. And it's not passive aggressive at all. What you are simply saying (in a round a bout way) is that it's not your place to judge, and you love them for the person they are.

    If it's not our place to judge, then why do we have to call them sinners?

    How about this as an alternative? "I don't have a problem with gay people."

    I agree with you 100%. We all sin, so calling someone on their sin is both pointless and redundant. Just for the record, I don't use that phrase. I was just trying to help explain why it is used. Even as a Christian, I find the phrase to be borderline cringe-worthy. But again, I was just trying to help explain the reasoning behind it. I couldn't agree more. And if someone asked me if I had a problem with gay people, I wouldn't go into this long diatribe about, "well, you know the Bible....." I would just say. No, every man/woman has the right to live their life as they see fit. And I would leave it at that.

    More people should be like you. (That's not sarcasm.)

    :smile:
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited December 2016
    This content has been removed.
  • ekim2016
    ekim2016 Posts: 1,198 Member
    glad to hear such positive remarks... gay people are awesome, I know many. My gay cousin always says, "gays are born with taste. They toss a throw pillow and it lands the right way"...haha
  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
    Deal breaker.
This discussion has been closed.

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