Ask a mortician

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  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    edited March 2017
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    kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »
    Sorry if someone asked this one before.

    I'm a huge investigation discovery channel junkie & was wondering if you ever had to work on a body that came into foul play & they still haven't solved the case.

    Also what's the youngest & oldest person you've ever had to work with?

    I've only had one person who was murdered. She was killed because her son had shot a 20 year guy at a house party a few weeks before. Three people are in prison and two are dead all because a guy stepped on someone's shoes at a party.

    The youngest person I've taken care of was a baby that was one month premature and the oldest was 98. My boss embalmed a lady who was 106.

    It's very rare for people to wake up on the embalming table, I've never heard of it happening to any embalmers that I know.
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
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    @LittleHearseDriver globally there's always, been a problem with; people being accidentally buried alive! 1 was, recently saved from; being cremated because the person putting them in, noticed a tear streaming via; an eye! Obviously a person might, not've detectable vital signs via; medical machinery (no pulse) & not everyone's autopsied! Do you take steps to ensure that the bodies you receive're in fact actually dead prior to, performing any postmortem work on them when it; might not otherwise be obvious due to rigor mortis and/or blood pooling? Such as: using a scalpel to, cut someone to; see if they bleed 1st?
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
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    DeficitDuchess wrote: »
    @LittleHearseDriver globally there's always, been a problem with; people being accidentally buried alive! 1 was, recently saved from; being cremated because the person putting them in, noticed a tear stream an eye! Obviously a person might, not've detectable vital signs via; medical machinery (no pulse) & not everyone's autopsied! Do you take steps to ensure that the bodies you receive're in fact actually dead prior to, performing any postmortem work on them when it; might not otherwise be obvious due to rigor mortis and/or blood pooling? Such as: using a scalpel to, cut someone to; see if they bleed 1st?

    That story sounds like a bunch of crap.Bodies that are going to cremated are in a cardboard container, if someone did shed a tear while being pushed into the retort no one would be able to see it.

    I don't make unnecessary incisions on a person to see if they are still alive. It would be obvious if the person was alive when I start embalming because they would move or make a noise when I make a one-inch incision at the base of the neck to get to the Carotid and the jugular.
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
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    LittleHearseDriver wrote: »
    DeficitDuchess wrote: »
    @LittleHearseDriver globally there's always, been a problem with; people being accidentally buried alive! 1 was, recently saved from; being cremated because the person putting them in, noticed a tear stream an eye! Obviously a person might, not've detectable vital signs via; medical machinery (no pulse) & not everyone's autopsied! Do you take steps to ensure that the bodies you receive're in fact actually dead prior to, performing any postmortem work on them when it; might not otherwise be obvious due to rigor mortis and/or blood pooling? Such as: using a scalpel to, cut someone to; see if they bleed 1st?

    That story sounds like a bunch of crap.Bodies that are going to cremated are in a cardboard container, if someone did shed a tear while being pushed into the retort no one would be able to see it.

    I don't make unnecessary incisions on a person to see if they are still alive. It would be obvious if the person was alive when I start embalming because they would move or make a noise when I make a one-inch incision at the base of the neck to get to the Carotid and the jugular.

    I tried to, find the original article to; post but the only thing that, I found was that the; undertaker realized she was alive (not exactly when, though)!

    However you, don't embalm everyone right to, make that incision?
  • LittleLionHeart1
    LittleLionHeart1 Posts: 3,655 Member
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    I saw this movie once. And it creeped me out. Martin Sheen. The Serpent and The Rainbow.
    "Don't let them bury me. I'm not dead." Eeek.
    https://youtu.be/LNRnOcW5yqs
  • Kintsugi_Haikyo
    Kintsugi_Haikyo Posts: 361 Member
    edited March 2017
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    LittleHearseDriver wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    When they take out organs for donation, do you guys sew them up or do the coroners?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

    We sew them up. It's my least favorite thing about autopsies because it takes forever and my hand cramps up. Plus it's hard to make them look good after their bodies have been through all of that.

    If where all the organs are taken out are covered with clothes, you could just use duct tape. Or would that be illegal or something?
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
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    DeficitDuchess wrote: »
    LittleHearseDriver wrote: »
    DeficitDuchess wrote: »
    @LittleHearseDriver globally there's always, been a problem with; people being accidentally buried alive! 1 was, recently saved from; being cremated because the person putting them in, noticed a tear stream an eye! Obviously a person might, not've detectable vital signs via; medical machinery (no pulse) & not everyone's autopsied! Do you take steps to ensure that the bodies you receive're in fact actually dead prior to, performing any postmortem work on them when it; might not otherwise be obvious due to rigor mortis and/or blood pooling? Such as: using a scalpel to, cut someone to; see if they bleed 1st?

    That story sounds like a bunch of crap.Bodies that are going to cremated are in a cardboard container, if someone did shed a tear while being pushed into the retort no one would be able to see it.

    I don't make unnecessary incisions on a person to see if they are still alive. It would be obvious if the person was alive when I start embalming because they would move or make a noise when I make a one-inch incision at the base of the neck to get to the Carotid and the jugular.

    I tried to, find the original article to; post but the only thing that, I found was that the; undertaker realized she was alive (not exactly when, though)!

    However you, don't embalm everyone right to, make that incision?

    You have to make an incision to get to the carotid artery and the jugular vein. There is no way to embalm without making an incision.
  • Jimb376mfp
    Jimb376mfp Posts: 6,231 Member
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    @LittleHearseDriver
    1. What is your first name?
    2. I thought of you today. I was listening to NPR and a lady was talking about having family members and friends perform some of the preparation of their deceased loved ones. She sounded like she may have been a funeral director. She discussed how people don't realize how difficult it is to dress a corpse.

    Have you had requests from family to get involved in the process? Such as dressing , make up etc!
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,492 Member
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    Have you ever been tempted to snort the ashes of someone with a rolled up fifty dollar bill?

    I had to ask for the group; I'm sure I'm not the only one wondering this same exact thing.
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    edited March 2017
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    Jimb376mfp wrote: »
    @LittleHearseDriver
    1. What is your first name?
    2. I thought of you today. I was listening to NPR and a lady was talking about having family members and friends perform some of the preparation of their deceased loved ones. She sounded like she may have been a funeral director. She discussed how people don't realize how difficult it is to dress a corpse.

    Have you had requests from family to get involved in the process? Such as dressing , make up etc!

    Dressing a body by myself is a challenge unless they are really small. If I have help it only take 5 minutes. Once in a blue moon a relative will ask to help dress their loved one, but most would rather do make-up than see them naked.

    Sorry, I don't like giving out my name. There are too many psychos on-line.
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Have you ever been tempted to snort the ashes of someone with a rolled up fifty dollar bill?

    Nope, nope, and nope.
  • JukeboxHeroine
    JukeboxHeroine Posts: 348 Member
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    @LittleHearseDriver

    I love that you don't sugar coat stuff. " load of crap"! I work as an ICU nurse and we unfortunately see funeral directors a few times a week. Bless you for your hard work and dedication.
  • Jimb376mfp
    Jimb376mfp Posts: 6,231 Member
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    Sorry, I don't like giving out my name. There are too many psychos on-line.
    ****************************************

    Not a psycho, just wondered aloud.

    I find this thread educational and "entertaining" in a macabre sense.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
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    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Have you ever been tempted to snort the ashes of someone with a rolled up fifty dollar bill?

    I had to ask for the group; I'm sure I'm not the only one wondering this same exact thing.

    Nope. You're the only one.
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
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    dc8066 wrote: »
    PlaydohPants wrote: »
    Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »
    Do you think the whole 'everyone loses 7lb at the point of death' thing is true? I.e. The human soul weighs 7lbs?

    I though it was something in grams? 21? 25?

    The weight of a human soul is 7 grams (1 oz is about 30 grams)
    I googled it... a soul is "alleged" to weigh 21 grams.

  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
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    What's the oldest coin you've placed on someone's eyes?
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,492 Member
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    have you ever poured liquor on a gravesite?

    pouring-out-liquor.gif
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
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    Anyone ever mic drop over a casket?

  • Jimb376mfp
    Jimb376mfp Posts: 6,231 Member
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    RavenLibra wrote: »
    dc8066 wrote: »
    PlaydohPants wrote: »
    Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »
    Do you think the whole 'everyone loses 7lb at the point of death' thing is true? I.e. The human soul weighs 7lbs?

    I though it was something in grams? 21? 25?

    The weight of a human soul is 7 grams (1 oz is about 30 grams)
    I googled it... a soul is "alleged" to weigh 21 grams.

    I'm happy to see someone awaken this "dead" thread LoL. Always interesting stuff here.
  • Sloth2016
    Sloth2016 Posts: 846 Member
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    Jimb376mfp wrote: »
    RavenLibra wrote: »
    dc8066 wrote: »
    PlaydohPants wrote: »
    Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »
    Do you think the whole 'everyone loses 7lb at the point of death' thing is true? I.e. The human soul weighs 7lbs?

    I though it was something in grams? 21? 25?

    The weight of a human soul is 7 grams (1 oz is about 30 grams)
    I googled it... a soul is "alleged" to weigh 21 grams.

    I'm happy to see someone awaken this "dead" thread LoL. Always interesting stuff here.

    I agree. Glad to see this one resurrected.

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