A Hurtful Comment.

Dnarules

StartEveryDayNew wrote: »

My husband just told me I look like a girl from the show "My 600 lb life". Not only did I cry but he laughed. I feel your pain....But at least you don't have to live with them on a daily

You don't either.

melaniedscott

To sum up: We might be fluffy...but we can lose weight. And they'll still be kittenholes. (I kitten myself...love the profanity filter!)

wildhog96

Way to go! It's great you used that comment as motivation instead of an excuse to head home.

Reaverie

They are the ugly ones, not you. You can lose the weight and retain your gentle spirit. They are dirty on the inside. I dont feel sorry for you.. I feel sorry for them. Its easy to clean up the outside, but not so much the inside. There are just nasty people in this world who think they are better than everyone else. The first time they have real problems, they wont have the ability to cope.

I bet a lot of people here have gone through this at one time or another so you arent alone. I got those kind of remarks from family and teachers growing up. People I was suppose to be able to trust. Now I look forward to the a$$e$ of this world because it gives me an outlet for my cynicism. My kids say I am the scariest nice person they ever met.

I was in the store and a boy about 11 or 12 turns down the isle I am in, gives me a disgusted look, then walks back out and turns down the next isle. I could hear his mother then ask him, "Did you find your sister?" And he said, "No, just this ugly fat white lady on the other isle." And his mother started snickering. She was tall and skinny and very pretty. He however was a little porker. Hardly one to insult another based on their weight. My daughter, ever the little me, says loud enough that they can hear, "Did porky pig just call you fat?" Silence... then they left their isle, passed ours without looking in, and walked to the other side of the store. I knew he had to be talking about me, cause the only people in that section was my daughter and I and there is no way she could be confused with ugly or fat.

My daughter isnt mean btw. She would never point out anothers flaws. But If you are a dick.. she will out dick you. If you try to make her cry, she will have you bawling. She doesnt like mean people. Both of us have a nasty habit of putting others back in their place. Right or wrong our sarcasm is an automatic defense mechanism for us.

cahubbard6421

StartEveryDayNew wrote: »

My husband just told me I look like a girl from the show "My 600 lb life". Not only did I cry but he laughed. I feel your pain....But at least you don't have to live with them on a daily

You've need to get the *kitten* out of that relationship. Also someone needs to slap the helm out of him

cahubbard6421

delamori wrote: »

How do you use kitten? I saw someone use it as well

You've ype in a cuss word. The system does the rest. *kitten*

Reaverie

cahubbard6421 wrote: »

StartEveryDayNew wrote: »

My husband just told me I look like a girl from the show "My 600 lb life". Not only did I cry but he laughed. I feel your pain....But at least you don't have to live with them on a daily

You've need to get the *kitten* out of that relationship. Also someone needs to slap the helm out of him

AGREED! What a terrible husband! If you dont believe in divorce, separate at the very least. You dont need that in your life.

arkowalyshyn

Maybe they were admiring your boobs

yogagirlT

Lovelyby20 wrote: »

Hello all, I figure I'd reach out to the threads because there's bound to be someone like me out there that this has happened to...

So yesterday, I was feeling like crap, my head hurts (getting over a very aggressive cold) and earlier in the day, I was contemplating skipping the gym and just catching up on some rest. I told myself no, and I was content with the feeling of me overcoming my procrastination. Anyhow, I got to the gym, needed to change out of my work clothes, so I changed into my gym clothes and returned to my car to leave my book bag (being I don't have a lock for the lockers). On my way back, I noticed these two men walking out of the mall, laughing and joking. Now, I know that wasn't about me, but the next thing I heard was:

"...needs to lose that gut. Baby got front!"

I turned briefly around to see if there was anyone behind me or so, on the side of me--hell even in front of me. There wasn't. It was me, in my gym clothes, feeling like complete *kitten* (in spandex no less), and taking those comments with me into the gym.

Needless to stay, I stayed on that treadmill for 65 minutes, the longest duration I've stayed on up to date. Incline a steady 3.0, adjusting the treadmill for vigorous walking and even spurts of jogging.

I am mortified to say it out loud, I wanted to cry in the gym, on the treadmill.

But then I realized that one day, that comment won't apply to me...

so I kept going.

**Sorry for being a complete sap, it's just that comments like those stay with me and they haunt me. My self-esteem is below 0, and it's hurtful to think that someone could say that about a complete stranger, especially one who's trying to better themselves**

Does anyone care to vent along with me...?

This happened to a friend who visited me this summer. She is a full-figured woman and these drunk idiots made awful, extremely rude comments about her size/weight to her when we were walking to dinner. She got really embarrassed and I know it really hurt her. She blew it off as them being idiots but she is sensitive about her weight and body and I think it soured her trip.

I didn't speak to my brother for 6 months after rude *and drunk* comments he made about my weight/stomach. This was years ago but those comments can still sting. Any person who is rude like that is just mirroring their own insecurities and obviously they are immature, rude and shallow aholes. One of many reasons why I won't teach at gyms or work out at meat market gyms, as I call them.

Good for you for sticking out your workout and please don't feel discouraged. Do not let the rude aholes of the world stop you.

Sending a virtual hug!

ddmom0811

Wow what a bunch of jerks. I'm so impressed that you went and worked out and went even longer. I probably would have cried and just left. Maybe not now that I'm 55, but when I was younger I certainly would have. After a certain age you are just like *kitten* them!
But look at you! You STILL went and worked out and went even longer. I'm very impressed with you! And those two are losers.

nutmegoreo

Those comments say way more about them, not you. Keep focused.

emd2570

Screw them - don't let negative comments get to you - you did good - you were determined even though you were hurt - wipe your tears and keep doing what you are doing - I have had people tell me I needed to lose weight - oh you have a pretty face ( that's the usual over weight girl compliment) - now I get negative comments saying I'm too thin - ( I'm not ) don't lose anymore weight - as my grandmother used to say - people have diarrhea of the mouth and constipation of thought .....

Lovelyby20 wrote: »

Hello all, I figure I'd reach out to the threads because there's bound to be someone like me out there that this has happened to...

So yesterday, I was feeling like crap, my head hurts (getting over a very aggressive cold) and earlier in the day, I was contemplating skipping the gym and just catching up on some rest. I told myself no, and I was content with the feeling of me overcoming my procrastination. Anyhow, I got to the gym, needed to change out of my work clothes, so I changed into my gym clothes and returned to my car to leave my book bag (being I don't have a lock for the lockers). On my way back, I noticed these two men walking out of the mall, laughing and joking. Now, I know that wasn't about me, but the next thing I heard was:

"...needs to lose that gut. Baby got front!"

I turned briefly around to see if there was anyone behind me or so, on the side of me--hell even in front of me. There wasn't. It was me, in my gym clothes, feeling like complete *kitten* (in spandex no less), and taking those comments with me into the gym.

Needless to stay, I stayed on that treadmill for 65 minutes, the longest duration I've stayed on up to date. Incline a steady 3.0, adjusting the treadmill for vigorous walking and even spurts of jogging.

I am mortified to say it out loud, I wanted to cry in the gym, on the treadmill.

But then I realized that one day, that comment won't apply to me...

so I kept going.

**Sorry for being a complete sap, it's just that comments like those stay with me and they haunt me. My self-esteem is below 0, and it's hurtful to think that someone could say that about a complete stranger, especially one who's trying to better themselves**

Does anyone care to vent along with me...?

jacobhillman

Talk about motivation.. sorry that happened to you but I'm sure it helped you that day.

You got this. :]

leesagagliardi

Don't put ur energy into focusing in on these guys (given they seem to have there heads up their rear ends, they have all the attention they need). Keep going and eyeball them during your next work out and kill it.

Rushbrook60

It's no wonder we live in a world where so many people suffer with low self esteem and depression. Whether we want to or like it, we soak up other people's comments and it eats away at us. It takes a spiteful and shallow person to make comments like that, but a much bigger and successful person to work through the feelings those comments leave behind. You will reach your goal and not because of those comments but because you are better than they are and stronger than they ever will be...just remember, they had to result in bullying to make themselves feel bigger, you don't!

Eliniita

There's one person in my life that sometimes comments on my weight...
It's kind of silly to me, as I am at a healthy weight, and when I was about 10lbs lighter, he'd comment on how I was too skinny. lol. Anyway, one day he said, "You're fat"
My reply? "No I'm not."
To which he said, "All women are fat"
My point is, some people are just ridiculous. Ignore them. Or laugh about it.

indiacaitlin

Unfortunately horrible people like that exist I'm really sorry you had to experience that and hope that nobody gives you that kind of crap again. But well done you for going back in there and smashing it! Keep it up, you'll get where you want to be in no time!

TeachingT

All of you on here are so incredibly supportive, I have tears in my eyes. I love this. I wish more people were like you all.

Savagedistraction

Things I have heard from people about MY body.
1. She's too muscular, she's gonna end up looking like a guy.
2. Those are fake boobs
3. No guy wants that

Unfortunately all of those things were said by their women. Fortunately, I don't give "rhymes with ducks" about what other people say or think about my body.

jennifer_417

People can be douchy. I know it's hard, but try not to let it get to you.

courtneyfabulous

How rude!!

I once had coworkers tell me (after I'd lost a significant amount of weight) that when I was heavy they were taking bets on if I was pregnant or not. It was just extra weight mostly from stress and eating out too much, but I tend to hold a lot of weight in my belly. I think they thought that since I had lost the weight and become slim the comment would be funny but it still hurt to think people I thought of as friends had been joking about my fatness behind my back- and then told me to my face once I was thin as if that was a different person and not me.

A couple years ago I gained weight again- again from stress but also from some health issues I was having. I've been mistaken as pregnant a few times again! Luckily innocent mistakes this time, not joking at my expense. I'm losing the weight again luckily and hopefully soon there will be no reason to wonder because the tummy will be gone.

cebreisch

Don't let the jerks get you down. You're not doing this for their sorry behinds. You're going to the gym for you. (And it is *possible* they were talking about someone else they know.)

My husband didn't want to go to the gym for the longest time because he just didn't want to be compared to all the buff body builder types lifting weights. I laughed at him and said the same thing to him - you're not going there for them - you're going there for you - who cares what they think.

I walk in there at my 330 pound badness and yes, have to get "bad self game face" on as if to say, "Yeah - I'm here and just try to mess with me!! You'll rue the day!!!"

fostersu

boo. It drives me crazy how people can act so casually violent and hurtful. Its agonizing to hear, but equally so to hold on to - that's why you come here and get lifted back up! Let them go - they are struggling themselves - and you are working hard.

RunWildYoungBeauty

I'd like to thank you ALL so much who took the time out and commented on this thread, I appreciate all of the kindness and support, and I read every single post--thank you, thank you, thank you! The post-topic is sad, but sharing these experiences with one another only encourage and uplift--thank you all so much!

VeryKatie

Your story really hammers home with me as to how strong a woman you are! You didn't let those jerks stop you even after they hurt you. So you should be really proud knowing you're stronger than that and you're better than them!

RunWildYoungBeauty

Aww why thank you, ma'am! I appreciate it!

StrongGirlFitGirl

That is SO wrong. And sad that it's happened to so many of us. Once, I was visiting a friend who just had a baby, when a DOCTOR started talking to me about when I was due. He was well-intentioned, but still. I carry so much weight in my belly, right where a baby'd be.

Anyway, this is about you! You rock SO hard for staying and doing your workout, and pushing yourself harder! You are beautiful inside and out!

DarkSinestra

I'm inspired that you took a moment where an unkind remark left a cut and used the pain to fuel your determination. Not only is that a sign of personal strength, it's a sign that your self-esteem IS improving. You took a stand for your health and your body image in the most constructive way possible and didn't even try to engage the real pigs in the equation. (Although I shouldn't say that. Pigs are lovely, funny, intelligent animals, not rude boors.)

The first time I had significant weight gain and had it on for a few years, I was in an art gallery with my husband and some woman looked me up and down, gave this nasty little smirk, and asked, "So when is it due?" To this day I don't know why this response popped into my head, but I immediately said, "It has been in there for five years so far. Do you think something's wrong?"

The look on her face was priceless, and even though her comment and the way it was asked hurt, flummoxing her and watching her try to process my response went a long way toward making it feel better. I don't even know for sure if she was trying to be nasty or just had one of those faces, but if my response gave her a reason never again to ask people unsolicited if they're pregnant, it was worth it. In the end, I don't think it matters if someone is trying to be nasty or even if it's about you. It's how you choose to respond that matters the most. You chose well! And then you came here and asked for encouragement, which is another healthy choice that helped even more people. That puts you miles ahead of any haters. Keep doing what you're doing. You're worth the effort.

HazyEyes93

I gotta be honest, as much as those kind of comments hurt. . . They are the best motivation. A co worker asked me when my baby was due. I am no pregnant. lmao Needless to say, I'm down 12 lbs in 4 weeks.

RunWildYoungBeauty

Thanks for all of the positive feedback, I was also assumed to be pregnant (back in high-school, twice by the same person)! Thank you three for the continued kindness and support! You all are so inspiring!