A Hurtful Comment.

Options
1235»

Replies

  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    Options
    How rude!!

    I once had coworkers tell me (after I'd lost a significant amount of weight) that when I was heavy they were taking bets on if I was pregnant or not. It was just extra weight mostly from stress and eating out too much, but I tend to hold a lot of weight in my belly. I think they thought that since I had lost the weight and become slim the comment would be funny but it still hurt to think people I thought of as friends had been joking about my fatness behind my back- and then told me to my face once I was thin as if that was a different person and not me.

    A couple years ago I gained weight again- again from stress but also from some health issues I was having. I've been mistaken as pregnant a few times again! Luckily innocent mistakes this time, not joking at my expense. I'm losing the weight again luckily and hopefully soon there will be no reason to wonder because the tummy will be gone.
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    Options
    Don't let the jerks get you down. You're not doing this for their sorry behinds. You're going to the gym for you. (And it is *possible* they were talking about someone else they know.)

    My husband didn't want to go to the gym for the longest time because he just didn't want to be compared to all the buff body builder types lifting weights. I laughed at him and said the same thing to him - you're not going there for them - you're going there for you - who cares what they think.

    I walk in there at my 330 pound badness and yes, have to get "bad self game face" on as if to say, "Yeah - I'm here and just try to mess with me!! You'll rue the day!!!" :smiley:
  • fostersu
    fostersu Posts: 327 Member
    Options
    boo. It drives me crazy how people can act so casually violent and hurtful. Its agonizing to hear, but equally so to hold on to - that's why you come here and get lifted back up! Let them go - they are struggling themselves - and you are working hard.
  • RunWildYoungBeauty
    RunWildYoungBeauty Posts: 43 Member
    Options
    I'd like to thank you ALL so much who took the time out and commented on this thread, I appreciate all of the kindness and support, and I read every single post--thank you, thank you, thank you! The post-topic is sad, but sharing these experiences with one another only encourage and uplift--thank you all so much! <3
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,931 Member
    Options
    Your story really hammers home with me as to how strong a woman you are! You didn't let those jerks stop you even after they hurt you. So you should be really proud knowing you're stronger than that and you're better than them!
  • RunWildYoungBeauty
    RunWildYoungBeauty Posts: 43 Member
    Options
    Aww why thank you, ma'am! :)<3 I appreciate it! <3
  • StrongGirlFitGirl
    StrongGirlFitGirl Posts: 183 Member
    Options
    That is SO wrong. And sad that it's happened to so many of us. Once, I was visiting a friend who just had a baby, when a DOCTOR started talking to me about when I was due. He was well-intentioned, but still. I carry so much weight in my belly, right where a baby'd be.

    Anyway, this is about you! You rock SO hard for staying and doing your workout, and pushing yourself harder! You are beautiful inside and out!
  • DarkSinestra
    DarkSinestra Posts: 45 Member
    Options
    I'm inspired that you took a moment where an unkind remark left a cut and used the pain to fuel your determination. Not only is that a sign of personal strength, it's a sign that your self-esteem IS improving. You took a stand for your health and your body image in the most constructive way possible and didn't even try to engage the real pigs in the equation. (Although I shouldn't say that. Pigs are lovely, funny, intelligent animals, not rude boors.)

    The first time I had significant weight gain and had it on for a few years, I was in an art gallery with my husband and some woman looked me up and down, gave this nasty little smirk, and asked, "So when is it due?" To this day I don't know why this response popped into my head, but I immediately said, "It has been in there for five years so far. Do you think something's wrong?"

    The look on her face was priceless, and even though her comment and the way it was asked hurt, flummoxing her and watching her try to process my response went a long way toward making it feel better. I don't even know for sure if she was trying to be nasty or just had one of those faces, but if my response gave her a reason never again to ask people unsolicited if they're pregnant, it was worth it. In the end, I don't think it matters if someone is trying to be nasty or even if it's about you. It's how you choose to respond that matters the most. You chose well! And then you came here and asked for encouragement, which is another healthy choice that helped even more people. That puts you miles ahead of any haters. Keep doing what you're doing. You're worth the effort.
  • HazyEyes93
    HazyEyes93 Posts: 89 Member
    Options
    I gotta be honest, as much as those kind of comments hurt. . . They are the best motivation. A co worker asked me when my baby was due. I am no pregnant. lmao Needless to say, I'm down 12 lbs in 4 weeks.
  • RunWildYoungBeauty
    RunWildYoungBeauty Posts: 43 Member
    Options
    Thanks for all of the positive feedback, I was also assumed to be pregnant (back in high-school, twice by the same person)! Thank you three for the continued kindness and support! You all are so inspiring! <3
  • ticiaelizabeth
    ticiaelizabeth Posts: 139 Member
    Options
    I hope you realize this is a greater reflection on them, showing what *kitten* people they are
  • activeadriana
    activeadriana Posts: 70 Member
    Options
    I was walking home yesterday, and I walked by two girls that looked at me and went, "Ew".

    A year earlier, that comment would've upset me for days, but now I don't really care. It stung a bit, but I'm not going to let those kinds of people get me down anymore. If they choose to say that, go right ahead, I'm just going to focus on improving my life. That kind of thing just motivates me to do more.

    At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what they say, or what they think. Remember you're doing this for you, not them, so just think positive and do what you can to make your life better.

    And great job on going to the gym! #Unstoppable

  • 49Elle
    49Elle Posts: 80 Member
    Options
    Were all on MFP because we want to make changes , look better and feel bettet about ourselves..we can make that happen. Many of us have experienced something similar..so we know how tough this was for you and how hard it was to keep your emotions in check.

    These judgemental guys probably make some lewd or inconsiderate comment about every girl they pass ... they're losers because their mindset is to be opinionated about everyone but themselves! Unlikely they will ever change or improve themselves for the better!

    I'm so glad you didn't let these cretins nasty comment derail your efforts and you powererd through the hurt feeling knowing you are improving and being fitter and healthier where they will always be morons!
    Well done

Categories