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My date with the person above me was going great until...
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she said "I can tell we are totally going to date forever."0
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His suggestion of "Taking a Shot of Jamison" didn't involved whiskey!1
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All he'd eat were oats and bananas...0
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A horse wandered up and she got on and left0
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Her hand got stuck in a bowling ball and she went flying down the lane0
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I realised her biceps were bigger than mine!0
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I had to open the ketchup bottle for him1
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Broke her leg0
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The hotel fire alarm went off...0
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I realize I would NEVER see his face0
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Great until I got that stare! That one that says, you will burn for eternity and I know where you live! Who knew she didn't like to share fries0
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I saw him share a fork of pork with another lady0
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It meant nothing, I swear. It was just a fork of pork! I saved the bacon for you!0
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Sweet peas were my grandma's favourite flowers so...0
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Until she said, hey let's ditch our pants and run around...now look at us!0
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Then the cops show up0
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He said dinner was my shout0
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She started French kissing my boyfriend0
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She refused to speak anything but Latin. I don't speak Latin0
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She choked on a sandwich and i had to give her the heimlich manoeuvre0
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He gagged while watching me eat0
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Her ear fell off in the middle of dinner1
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She tried to steal my food0
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She tried to steal my brain0
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I realized she had very little brains1
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My nipple fell off when I pulled up my shirt0
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She clipped her nails mid way through dinner and one of the clippings landed on my plate.0
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