Parents let their kids eat trash?

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Replies

  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    I don't know why they do it, but in my family, I fell victim to the junk food alternative. I used to laugh at kids when their parents wouldn't let them eat fast food or drink soda, but now I wish my family was stricter on my diet. Right now, they all think of me as a stick, and they constantly say I should "gain weight" because I'm "wasting away". I'm the only person in the house with a healthy BMI (I don't like the BMI system, but as an example) and that actively exercises. I hope that since being healthy is starting to grow more and more popular, the next generation of parents will be stricter on the diets of their kids. I'm not saying that there shouldn't be any junk food or fast food days, but when you have it for dinner 1-3 times a week, and the groceries consist of nothing but unhealthy things such as honeybuns and chips, it's hard to live a healthy lifestyle, especially for young kids.
    my parents restricted us so much (there were 5 of us) that we are all fat now. bad idea...teach balance, let kids choose, let them make mistakes in choosing. i don't know...restrictions didn't work for my parents.

    I agree with that, because denying kids fast food/unhealthy foods COULD result in a whiplash (Can that even be used in this context) But I feel like many people here are being defensive, as many of them are parents. I know healthy eating is usually more expensive than the cheaper alternatives, but I think the OP has a point. We should encourage a healthier lifestyle, but with tolerance and balance in having unhealthy days and choices.

    And I'm in no way trying to disrespect parents here, I'm just trying to make a point. It's definitely okay to have cheat days and reward days for kids in my opinion, but it can't be a frequent thing, as well as unhealthy foods. That may not make them gain weight while they're little, but it probably will when they get older.

    Thank you for representing children as the youngest age allowed on these boards. Thank you even more for doing it in a more mature, articulate, and respectful manner than the unfortunate OP. Thank you also for having a balanced perspective at such a young age. You're gonna be alright. :flowerforyou:
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
    I don't know why they do it, but in my family, I fell victim to the junk food alternative. I used to laugh at kids when their parents wouldn't let them eat fast food or drink soda, but now I wish my family was stricter on my diet. Right now, they all think of me as a stick, and they constantly say I should "gain weight" because I'm "wasting away". I'm the only person in the house with a healthy BMI (I don't like the BMI system, but as an example) and that actively exercises. I hope that since being healthy is starting to grow more and more popular, the next generation of parents will be stricter on the diets of their kids. I'm not saying that there shouldn't be any junk food or fast food days, but when you have it for dinner 1-3 times a week, and the groceries consist of nothing but unhealthy things such as honeybuns and chips, it's hard to live a healthy lifestyle, especially for young kids.
    my parents restricted us so much (there were 5 of us) that we are all fat now. bad idea...teach balance, let kids choose, let them make mistakes in choosing. i don't know...restrictions didn't work for my parents.

    I agree with that, because denying kids fast food/unhealthy foods COULD result in a whiplash (Can that even be used in this context) But I feel like many people here are being defensive, as many of them are parents. I know healthy eating is usually more expensive than the cheaper alternatives, but I think the OP has a point. We should encourage a healthier lifestyle, but with tolerance and balance in having unhealthy days and choices.

    And I'm in no way trying to disrespect parents here, I'm just trying to make a point. It's definitely okay to have cheat days and reward days for kids in my opinion, but it can't be a frequent thing, as well as unhealthy foods. That may not make them gain weight while they're little, but it probably will when they get older.

    Thank you for representing children as the youngest age allowed on these boards. Thank you even more for doing it in a more mature, articulate, and respectful manner than the unfortunate OP. Thank you also for having a balanced perspective at such a young age. You're gonna be alright. :flowerforyou:
    There is hope for society yet *tear*
  • PanaMericann
    PanaMericann Posts: 47 Member
    I don't know why they do it, but in my family, I fell victim to the junk food alternative. I used to laugh at kids when their parents wouldn't let them eat fast food or drink soda, but now I wish my family was stricter on my diet. Right now, they all think of me as a stick, and they constantly say I should "gain weight" because I'm "wasting away". I'm the only person in the house with a healthy BMI (I don't like the BMI system, but as an example) and that actively exercises. I hope that since being healthy is starting to grow more and more popular, the next generation of parents will be stricter on the diets of their kids. I'm not saying that there shouldn't be any junk food or fast food days, but when you have it for dinner 1-3 times a week, and the groceries consist of nothing but unhealthy things such as honeybuns and chips, it's hard to live a healthy lifestyle, especially for young kids.
    my parents restricted us so much (there were 5 of us) that we are all fat now. bad idea...teach balance, let kids choose, let them make mistakes in choosing. i don't know...restrictions didn't work for my parents.

    I agree with that, because denying kids fast food/unhealthy foods COULD result in a whiplash (Can that even be used in this context) But I feel like many people here are being defensive, as many of them are parents. I know healthy eating is usually more expensive than the cheaper alternatives, but I think the OP has a point. We should encourage a healthier lifestyle, but with tolerance and balance in having unhealthy days and choices.

    And I'm in no way trying to disrespect parents here, I'm just trying to make a point. It's definitely okay to have cheat days and reward days for kids in my opinion, but it can't be a frequent thing, as well as unhealthy foods. That may not make them gain weight while they're little, but it probably will when they get older.

    Thank you for representing children as the youngest age allowed on these boards. Thank you even more for doing it in a more mature, articulate, and respectful manner than the unfortunate OP. Thank you also for having a balanced perspective at such a young age. You're gonna be alright. :flowerforyou:

    Aww thank you! :) I just hope I don't come across as ignorant because I'm not a parent.
  • kerr2010
    kerr2010 Posts: 219 Member
    My husband is a better person than I am because I probably would have knocked her Big Mac right straight off her tray if I was there. :)
    I don't mean this to be rude/snarky, but I want to share a personal experience with you. This happened when my husband took our first daughter for her 18 mo vaccinations. Her appointment was at 11:30 and my husband had to drop her back off at daycare afterwards and return to work. Because of the timing she would miss lunch at her daycare. So to make a difficult (and most likely painful) day a special treat I told my husband to take her to McDonalds for a special treat (lunch with daddy).

    My husband set her up at the table with her chicken nuggets, apple slices, and white milk, ready to spend some quality time with her before they had to leave. Well he was shamed and yelled at by another patron for feeding my daughter McDonalds. Yes this older woman (who was eating in the same establishment) criticized my husband in front of my young child because she assumed that this was a regular occurrence. Perhaps she felt she had to because my husband was overweight (I often wonder if she would have said something to someone thinner or more fit).

    This upset me greatly for so many reasons. This woman had no idea what my child's day was like. She had no knowledge of what my child's health was. She had no idea what her normal eating habits were.

    So in conclusion, do not judge a situation unless you have all of the facts.

    And I GREATLY appreciate that answer. I was not judging, I was honestly just curious as to the decision-making process that goes into this. Many of these responses have really opened my eyes to the decisions parents make, and how they do it, and now I am better informed. I appreciate those responses. (And I think I would have thrown my milk/ketchup/fist into that woman's face. Your husband is a better man that I.)
  • nyrina4life
    nyrina4life Posts: 196 Member
    Between Instagram and people-watching at restaurants, I notice that parents will make healthy decisions for themselves, but order deep-friend/fatty foods for their own kids. Why is that?

    Use some better tact when posting something about children. My niece is a grazer, and so she does get chicken tenders and fries or mac 'n cheese, or something simple.

    Also, just because you are people watching at restaurants it does not mean that those same kids do not eat healthy at home. My niece may eat like that at a restaurant because that's what she wants, but at home she will eat veggies, and fruit and yes she still has junk, but so what???

    Sometimes you have to give a little to please the child and trust me, it is better to give then deal with some of those wild, no stopping for an hour tantrums.
  • bettyann55
    bettyann55 Posts: 87 Member
    I can only say that when I was a child, if my parents had handed me a Happy Meal toy and a salad, I would have eaten the toy.
    I agree
  • nyrina4life
    nyrina4life Posts: 196 Member


    My father used to push all kinds of food on me... "try this," "try that." It was hard to resist, but most of the time I did. However, I was the type who when I ate a lot... it was A LOT!!! I wasn't really a huge candy, dessert or snacking kind of kid.


    THIS! My dad forced so much 'good' - 'real' food on me that I grew to hate them. I even poured kool-aid in the peas and he tried to force me to eat them or suffer. I refused, and got off the hook after an hour of crying.... but case in point, I grew up disliking the real foods because they came with BAD memories. I'm just now learning to like and enjoy foods I once loathed because of those memories.

    That being said, when I have kids... I will give them choices. But I think I can make snacks yummy, I live with a picky eater (worse than me). So it takes some creative thinking.

    Again, remember that what you see in public will never tell the full story of ones life.
  • calibriintx
    calibriintx Posts: 1,741 Member
    When I was a kid, my family very rarely ate out, and never at fast food places. We had meat, much of it hunted or homegrown, homegrown vegetables from Dad's garden, and I ate what my parents ate, period, there was no separate meal for the kid. I loved vegetables from childhood on, despite the fact that Mom cooked all veggies until soft. The only things I learned to hate were fried fish and canned tuna. --- Now I'm curious. Why do parents let their kids eat fast food and fried stuff? Why would the kids be allowed to make the decision? Is it just to avoid arguing with them about what they will eat? Wouldn't it be best to tell the kids you'll eat healthy food, you don't have a choice? Would somebody be kind enough to inform me?

    Because some parents are the worst kind of parents who have no idea how to just say NO to their kids

    Are you two in the wrong thread? How does letting kids have fried food occasionally justify the label of "the worst kind of parents?" Read the replies. Multiple people answered the questions above in their replies. By all means, raise your kids to eat nothing but whole foods and teach them to feel superior about it, like you both seem to. I'll teach mine moderation and to mind her own business.
  • Thena81
    Thena81 Posts: 1,265 Member
    omg, ive always wondered this! i've worked in restaurants many a day lol and ive seen it, its crazy! mom gets broiled fish and the kids get processed nuggets n fries!
  • RachelBiancaxx
    RachelBiancaxx Posts: 62 Member
    I think it's ok to let kids have fast food every now and then. What's not ok is buying them a happy meal with coke at 10am... But that's my opinion, my daughter's 18 months old and has never had fast food.
  • ashleyisgreat
    ashleyisgreat Posts: 586 Member
    I think it's ok to let kids have fast food every now and then. What's not ok is buying them a happy meal with coke at 10am... But that's my opinion, my daughter's 18 months old and has never had fast food.

    Wait...what does the time have to do with it??
  • RachelBiancaxx
    RachelBiancaxx Posts: 62 Member
    I think it's ok to let kids have fast food every now and then. What's not ok is buying them a happy meal with coke at 10am... But that's my opinion, my daughter's 18 months old and has never had fast food.

    Wait...what does the time have to do with it??

    Well to me that's too early for lunch, that's like snack time. I wonder what happens when they get hungry a couple of hours later. Was the McDonalds breakfast, lunch or some additional meal? Obviously I don't know what someone elses schedule looks like but that just doesn't seem like a healthy time to eat that meal. To me.
  • hsnider29
    hsnider29 Posts: 394 Member
    My son is 13 and eats a wide variety of foods. He plays football and is at a very healthy weight. He eats any vegetable, meat and pretty much all seafood. He will eat stuff that I wouldn't touch. He also likes junk food. He has a good handle on portion control and is very active so I don't worry at all about his weight or his food choices.

    My 3 year old daughter is extremely picky. I don't know why. I have always offered her vegetables. We are not picky eaters and I have always cooked healthy meals. She eats a lot of yogurt, cottage cheese, fruit, nuts and sandwiches. I still offer her vegetables and can usually get her to take at least one bite. She won't even eat potatoes. She does occasionally eat chicken nuggets and fruit snacks but she is also active and at a healthy weight. We eat out occasionally and I let my kids get what they want. My son usually gets a steak, baked potato and salad and my daughter usually gets chicken tenders and fries or fruit. I think balance is important, as is portion control.

    I have noticed since I told my daughter that the Elf on the Shelf only came to see kids that ate their dinner she has been more receptive to eating her food.
  • godsgrl33
    godsgrl33 Posts: 307 Member
    Honestly, I think it has a lot to do with the "Kid's menu", and all restaurants suggest that we give the kids chicken nuggets and french fries, when they really aren't good for them. Sometimes, this is a once a week, or once every other week treat, and this is okay in the whole scheme of things. Maybe these kids eat healthy the other 20 meals out of the week. But, I will have to say that for myself, I don't let my kids just order what they want. The only thing unhealthy that I usually allow is their soda pop, and I limit that to one. Unfortunately, we can only control what we do, not what others do, even if we see an obese child.
  • hsnider29
    hsnider29 Posts: 394 Member
    This exact subject makes me so damn irritated! I swear people think that it is child abuse if you feed your kids healthy food! And you know what?!? I hate even calling it healthy food! IT'S FOOD!! REAL DAMN FOOD!! The garbage that most people feed their kids is disgusting!! I have people judge me all the time because my kids eat what I eat...vegetables, proteins, low sugar. They think that I am being unfair to my kids and that I'm not feeding them real food. I love how people think that hot dogs, cookies, candy, pizza, etc is a great diet for kids. To me, FEEDING YOUR KIDS THAT CRAP IS ABUSE!! Sorry! Had to rant..I was having this exact discussion with someone today because they said they couldn't diet because they couldn't feed their kids diet food!!! What exactly is diet food?? Are you talking vegetables, fiber, good oils/fats, lean meats? Because that is real food!! GRRRR

    I'm totally going to go there and probably lock the thread.

    Did you breastfeed your children?
  • peggymdellinger
    peggymdellinger Posts: 151 Member
    You know what's "funny" about this... it IS just a snapshot... sometimes my kids DO just have salad and grilled chicken for dinner at home. When we go out they get what they want. One time, as an example, my son got a turkey sandwich with lettuce and tomato and when the waiter asked him if he wanted fries (he's four) he asked the waiter if they had broccoli. He got broccoli. So, it's not just "telling your kids what they have to eat"... it's also introducing them to many foods as they're young AND letting them make some of their own decisions. That same day my daughter got a chicken and cheese enchilada with nothing else. On other occasions she' s gotten catfish and green beans... Sometimes they want grilled cheese or pizza, sometimes they want fish or a salad. They are people too, and if we, as parents, have attempted to introduce them to a variety of foods then they know what they like and should be allowed to have it within reason, at home or not. They're not just little robots into which we can inject lean meats, vegetables, whole grains, and fruit. We can introduce them to those things and tell them why they're healthy, we can make sure that they are not receiving "special" meals (barring a medical necessity), but we cannot treat them as though they have no say over what they consume. Where does that end? No say over their food, no say over their clothes, no say over their friends, etc... If that's the way that you want to treat your kids, fine. But don't ***** when another parent chooses to let their child have some autonomy... and FFS, don't think you know what they ALWAYS do based upon a few incidences.
  • pluckabee
    pluckabee Posts: 346 Member
    I think it's disgusting that people so easily judge others like this without knowing anything else about their life and routine.

    Let people do what they want, jeez.
  • Oishii
    Oishii Posts: 2,675 Member
    omg, ive always wondered this! i've worked in restaurants many a day lol and ive seen it, its crazy! mom gets broiled fish and the kids get processed nuggets n fries!

    And was broiled fish on the kids' menu?
  • freemystery
    freemystery Posts: 184 Member
    Between Instagram and people-watching at restaurants, I notice that parents will make healthy decisions for themselves, but order deep-friend/fatty foods for their own kids. Why is that?

    I only speak from my own experience but for us, meals out were a huge treat. At home a typical week of meals would only consist of one meal a week each of red meat, fish and white meat. There rest were veggie, often lentil based in the form of traditional soups, stews and curries. Not the fancy restaurant kind swimming in oil. The basic hearty fare that my parents and grandparents grew up with.

    When we went out HELLS YES I was going to order deep fried chicken nuggets and sugary soda and as many potato chips and I could cram into my body.
    In this context I think that's fair enough. We didn't eat out a lot so it's not like I was getting this lard overload weekly or anything but you never know the back story or motivations that parents have. Some will be not so noble but most are just doing their best. Nobody wakes up in the morning and is like "RIGHT today i'm gonna make sure my kids get diabetes."
  • rachseby
    rachseby Posts: 285 Member
    When I was growing up, there were no "treats" in our house. I ate what was prepared. We had milk or water to drink, maybe every once in a blue moon orange juice. No snacks, cookies, ice cream, chicken nuggets (you get the point). As soon as I got out on my own I couldn't get enough junk food. I think that when parents completely restrict things kids then don't learn how to have treats in moderation. I have four kids, and when we go out (which is rare) I let them get what they want. I buy treats, but they eat their healthy meals before being allowed any, and I talk to them about what is healthy and why we eat what we do. I also try to teach them about portion size, something that I wasn't taught. Even though we ate "healthy" I have always had a problem with portion size, which led to my current weight problem. I have two very picky eaters, but they do eat certain healthy things (my 7 year old loves salad) and so I give them the same things a lot, but give them healthy choices b/w the things that they will eat. My kids actually make pretty good choices normally. They love their carbs, but I read that kids really need more carbs than adults. They actually really don't like fast food except for chick fil a or subway, which is occasionally a problem if we are on a road trip and the only restaurant is McD's..
  • rachseby
    rachseby Posts: 285 Member
    This exact subject makes me so damn irritated! I swear people think that it is child abuse if you feed your kids healthy food! And you know what?!? I hate even calling it healthy food! IT'S FOOD!! REAL DAMN FOOD!! The garbage that most people feed their kids is disgusting!! I have people judge me all the time because my kids eat what I eat...vegetables, proteins, low sugar. They think that I am being unfair to my kids and that I'm not feeding them real food. I love how people think that hot dogs, cookies, candy, pizza, etc is a great diet for kids. To me, FEEDING YOUR KIDS THAT CRAP IS ABUSE!! Sorry! Had to rant..I was having this exact discussion with someone today because they said they couldn't diet because they couldn't feed their kids diet food!!! What exactly is diet food?? Are you talking vegetables, fiber, good oils/fats, lean meats? Because that is real food!! GRRRR

    I'm totally going to go there and probably lock the thread.

    Did you breastfeed your children?
    dun dun dun duuuuuuunnnnnnn
  • ShrinkingMuslimah
    ShrinkingMuslimah Posts: 99 Member
    I have four step-kids ranging in ages from 8 - 18 (When I met them it was 4 - 14).
    They get treats every now and again, but the bulk of their food is healthy.

    I think what OP may be observing is people taking their kids out to restaurants and getting the kids "unhealthy" meals. Well, if these parents take their kids to a restaurant once/month and feed them healthy food at home the rest of the time (which no one can see unless you're peeking in their window every night) I don't see anything wrong with that!

    The key is to teach kids exactly what lifestyle eating is all about. Yes, give them treats every now and again, chicken nuggets and fries or whatever it is. But make sure they understand that it's only a "sometimes" thing, not for every day. Isn't this what most of us are trying to do here? Eat healthy the majority of the time, but be realistic and treat ourselves every now and again?

    Also, kids learn their habits from their parents, so maybe they order french fries this time and see mum eating salad, maybe after a while they start wanting to try what mum's eating. Mum doesn't have to deprive them of a treat every now and again, but if she can set a good example, and the kids learn from it then that's great! Still doesn't mean they can't all enjoy some ice cream for desert too ;)
  • snookumss
    snookumss Posts: 1,451 Member
    I don't know what you're talking about. My kids are on raspberry ketones and the green coffee bean enema cleanse, just like all the sensible adults.

    ROFLMAO
  • fjrandol
    fjrandol Posts: 437 Member
    When I was little and we'd go out for dinner, my mom would give me the salad that came with her meal and she would eat my french fries. I thought I was getting the better end of the deal because the salad had beets on it. Mmmmmm!!!

    Maybe if kids meals had healthier choices people wouldn't get the chicken fingers for the little ones, I don't know though, since we don't have any of our own.

    Personally though, I'd rather people let the kids eat macaroni and hot dogs when they're out to eat, if it'll keep the kids from running around in the aisles or screaming bloody murder! :smile: After all, it's supposed to be a treat to go out, right?
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    So much judgement in one little thread. Whatever happened to minding your own business? I say this generally, not just to the OP. And feeding my kids pizza is child abuse? M'kay.


    My kids aren't allowed to go over 1200 calories and I don't let them eat their baseball/trampoline/bikeriding/etc calories back.
  • Parents tend to think something along the lines of:" They are kids, they should be able to eat whatever" or "They are growing" or.. "They have fast metabolic rates, it's okay" I don't think that's right in my opinion especially if the parents are not preaching good eating habits to their kids. We develop our eating habits from a very early age, and they continue through out our life. At the end of the day, kids are kids and shouldn't have to worry about calories and their candy consumption, but I do believe there should always be that common sense in the back of their minds that guide them towards healthier food choices.

    Edit - don't be so quick to judge, they were eating out, you don't know anything about their lives.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    First, children's menu's don't have many options for 'healthy' foods in most places. Most have grilled cheese, chicken nuggets, burgers, etc... Thankfully, you can redeem yourself on sides most of the time. Fruit, veggies, cottage cheese, applesauce..

    Steakhouses usually have a kid's size steak tips and that is what my son gets. He loves fruits and some veggies so I will make him get green beans, steamed veggies or apple sauce as a side.

    Then again, I try to be pretty consistent with my kid. I don't deny him much when it comes to food but his options are usually pretty healthy. If he does have junk, the rest of the food in his day is going to be healthy. Don't always assume by what kids are eating for ONE MEAL when you see them.
  • sticksandtwigs
    sticksandtwigs Posts: 20 Member
    "Most parents let their kids eat trash." I am proud to say that my mom has been breaking this stereotype since I was in pre-kindergarten. :smile: One of my earliest memories is of sitting down to eat lunch in those early days, opening my lunchbox, and discovering a container of sliced bell peppers. Me, thinking; "What IS this stuff??" I looked over at my young friends, who were naturally pulling out fruit snacks and that kind of pure sugar all toddlers idolize. I thought to myself; "Man, they're lucky!":grumble: I don't have any kids, but I know that if you feed a 5-yr old mcdonald's crap, they'll burn it off by running in circles until they fall over. Not that I agree with that, but most of them can eat junk and it goes right through them.
  • hsnider29
    hsnider29 Posts: 394 Member
    When I was growing up, there were no "treats" in our house. I ate what was prepared. We had milk or water to drink, maybe every once in a blue moon orange juice. No snacks, cookies, ice cream, chicken nuggets (you get the point). As soon as I got out on my own I couldn't get enough junk food. I think that when parents completely restrict things kids then don't learn how to have treats in moderation. I have four kids, and when we go out (which is rare) I let them get what they want. I buy treats, but they eat their healthy meals before being allowed any, and I talk to them about what is healthy and why we eat what we do. I also try to teach them about portion size, something that I wasn't taught. Even though we ate "healthy" I have always had a problem with portion size, which led to my current weight problem. I have two very picky eaters, but they do eat certain healthy things (my 7 year old loves salad) and so I give them the same things a lot, but give them healthy choices b/w the things that they will eat. My kids actually make pretty good choices normally. They love their carbs, but I read that kids really need more carbs than adults. They actually really don't like fast food except for chick fil a or subway, which is occasionally a problem if we are on a road trip and the only restaurant is McD's..

    I agree. Moderation is key. I think a few people on this post have said the same as you about being restricted as a child with food.
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
    Well for me, it's because I cook very healthy meals at home (that my son happily eats). Restaurants are about his only chance for fried/unhealthy food. I give him a menu and let him order what he wants. Since his calorie needs are a lot higher than mine and we don't eat out every day, I don't worry about it.

    This - the only time the kids get chips is when we are out and we dont even own a fryer. Meals out are the only time they can indulge.