How disgusting is this...
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I found this beautifully written, and there has been research to show that you can be "fat and fit" It doesn't say she binge eats all the time in an effort to gain weight, she simply says that sometimes she eats grilled cheese and sometimes she eats kale. She also walks a mile a day. After an entire life of disordered eating, it will probably take her body years to recover and become its actual weight. What is wrong with that?
this.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.0 -
It's her choice but she should understand that actions come with consequences whether you like them or not.
This.
She is living in the present and not concerning herself with the future. It's dangerous to be young and dumb.
ok. So she is overweight. Which is indicated in all sorts of unhealthy stuff. But there is more to this than just health. When I was technically obese, I ran half marathons and worked out all the time. I also just happened to eat a lot. I ate mostly organic, all vegetarian, carb heavy yumminess. I don't think I was on the verge of some major heart attack for that. It's possible to be over weight and be pretty active. A low body fat is not the end all be all of "health." What y'all need to take into account is mental health. You can beat yourself up and feel like **** all the time because you are trying to lose weight, or you can aim to be healthy (have good blood work) and active (going for walks and ****) and have a more positive attitude. I think this article is about choosing mental health over societal beauty standards.
I think that sometimes taking this approach actually eventually leads to a healthier body.
I'd be interested to see how this author's blood work and scale changes over the next five years.0 -
Why do you think it is disgusting? its her choice.
You're kidding... right?
It is her choice, even though she is just slowly killing herself. People who don't care about themselves can find ways to be content with all sorts of bad behavior: be it overeating, not exercising, doing drugs, sex addiction...you name it. She obviously has deep seated self esteem issues, and she's fighting against one thing she shouldn't be: her health. Still like another poster said, it is her choice, and she's not hurting ANYONE except for herself.
her family... her community... oh yea and the burden of the healthcare system
Oh thank you for mentioning the burden on the healthcare system. Our costs are now rising because hospitals and clinics need new beds/toilets/etc in order to treat those that are obese. I truly believe she is hiding behind all of the bad things that happened in her life as an easy way out to being as unhealthy as she wants to be.
And let me just say I used to be the same way.... we all have the power to break the cycle
Stay strong OP0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?0 -
Out of curiosity, do you feel the same way when you see someone smoking? I'm not necessarily disagreeing with you-- at some point, it becomes irksome to pay for someone else's decisions-- but dissection uncovers a TON of choices people make that the rest of the world ends up paying for in some form or fashion.She can choose whatever she wants, as long as I'm not going to have to pay for it (health care costs, disablility payments, etc). But the likelihood of me having to pay for it ticks me off.
Or having unprotected sex. Making babies they can't pay for. Driving recklessly. Driving period (if you are a cyclist).
I think the impetus people have to be disgusted doesn't come from some concern about social costs, it's fat phobia. Plain and simple.0 -
I mean, ****, I think that people should be more outraged about her father beating the **** out of her, but here people are more upset that she isn't going on some diet to lose weight.
SMH.
Our society is ****ed.0 -
I mean, ****, I think that people should be more outraged about her father beating the **** out of her, but here people are more upset that she isn't going on some diet to lose weight.
SMH.
Our society is ****ed.
Actually, I'm upset that she is refusing to address the mental and emotional scars that the abuse created. Being fat is what made her feel better. By choosing to stay fat, she is choosing not to find a more constructive coping mechanism.0 -
I mean, ****, I think that people should be more outraged about her father beating the **** out of her, but here people are more upset that she isn't going on some diet to lose weight.
SMH.
Our society is ****ed.
you should stop and smell the roses sometime.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
But the author isn't saying that the individuals who lost weight believe that they have achieved one thing. OTHER people think that. That whole paragraph is told from the perspective of an outsider who is observing the attitudes of society in general. So, she is saying that society (specifically, the shows that perpetuate the idea that a person's greatest achievement is weight loss, and the viewers who soak it up) are reducing these peoples' lives down to a single achievement. She doesn't agree with that assessment, though.0 -
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
i lost my weight... time to drop out of the pa program or to better my life. i am at the top of the hill ma!
I agree with your logical perception of her reality. She wants zero human relationships to minimize the pain that these cause her. Her outside contact is her writing where she feels people will only judge her for its content. Her staying obese is her thinking process that she believes will cause others to not start any type of relationship with her. Thus she is safe.0 -
That is disgusting on many levels.Losing weight may be as simple as joining a walking after work Meetup or forgoing the homemade cupcakes a co-worker brings in on Monday, but I’m not interested in sacrifices.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
She's not talking about them, she is talking about how the television shows present them.0 -
I mean, ****, I think that people should be more outraged about her father beating the **** out of her, but here people are more upset that she isn't going on some diet to lose weight.
SMH.
Our society is ****ed.
you should stop and smell the roses sometime.
You obviously didn't see the thread where I was talking about how much fun I had banging a raider's fan.
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I mean, ****, I think that people should be more outraged about her father beating the **** out of her, but here people are more upset that she isn't going on some diet to lose weight.
SMH.
Our society is ****ed.
Actually, I'm upset that she is refusing to address the mental and emotional scars that the abuse created. Being fat is what made her feel better. By choosing to stay fat, she is choosing not to find a more constructive coping mechanism.
I see what you are saying here. Like she has a bad coping mechanism and she is embracing that. That makes more sense to me than a lot of other people's comments here.
On the other hand, I think this article is about social pressure on a woman to look a certain way and the woman choosing to prioritize other things in her life. I don't think the pressure on her to be thin is about her health. It's about our society's attitude towards "Fat chicks." It's the epitome of the "ugly chick." If I were an ugly chick, who shouldn't show my face (have you seen the movie "Grown ups"? There's the pretty girls and the ugly girl in there.), I might rather focus my attention on my academics and career, even if people keep telling me to get a make over. To me, that's more what is going on here. And what if I choose to stay "ugly"? Is that some horrible crime? Perhaps I value other things about myself more than that. This is how I read the article- a woman speaking out about the pressure and assumptions made on her about her physical appearance, who chooses to not conform. Yes, of course, she might be "healthier" if she were less heavy, but I don't think she is saying "f you" to her health (she mentioned blood work, etc.
I know folks who are bigger folks who are healthy and who pursue careers and are amazing and their size isn't on their agenda. I think that's ok.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
She's not talking about them, she is talking about how the television shows present them.
THIS. Reading skills matter, folks. You can't attribute things to the author that she didn't actually say.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
She's not talking about them, she is talking about how the television shows present them.
Okay. So we are back to its okay for to me keep my old coping mechanism (fat) because society says its bad and society sucks so I refuse to conform because it means I can keep my "suit of armor".
It's still NOT a good reason to neglect mental health.0 -
Normally, I would agree with you, except that she specifically condemns people who celebrate their accomplishment of weight loss. The author seems to have a general disdain for any suggestion or implication that better health is a sensible reason to pursue weight loss. ...
Please reread the article. She said that their achievements of their lives shouldn't be just that one thing. Remember how she was talking to her adviser and all they talked about was her weight, not her academic achievements? yeah. That's the point.
I seriously doubt that the only conversation that she ever had with her academic advisor was about her weight. However, I am certain that is the only conversation that she retained because her weight is so heavily associated with deep-seeded pain from her childhood.
She said " I just wish that the entirety of their lives weren’t reduced to a single achievement." How is that condemning them?
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
She's not talking about them, she is talking about how the television shows present them.
Okay. So we are back to its okay for to keep my old coping mechanism (fat) because society says its bad and society sucks so I refuse to conform because it means I can keep my "suit of armor".
It's still NOT a good reason to neglect mental health.
Right but internalizing society's expectation that she hate herself isn't going to help either.0 -
The problem is that she justifies her logics with absolutes. I don't know a single person that loses weight and then decides that they have achieved all that they want in life. That is a false perception created by the author to justify the logic that she can hold onto her fat. The fat that makes her feel emotionally safe.
She's not talking about them, she is talking about how the television shows present them.
Okay. So we are back to its okay for to keep my old coping mechanism (fat) because society says its bad and society sucks so I refuse to conform because it means I can keep my "suit of armor".
It's still NOT a good reason to neglect mental health.
She is seeing a therapist. How is she neglecting mental health? Also, how is it unhealthy to feel satisfied with how you look? Or to want to be seen by others as more than just a body?0
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