Is my marriage depressing me or is my depression ruining my marriage?

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Replies

  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    I thought Marriage & Depression go together like Peanut Butter & Jelly.

    I would be concerned if you weren't depressed...
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    I thought Marriage & Depression go together like Peanut Butter & Jelly.

    I would be concerned if you weren't depressed...

    Depends on the peanut butter.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    I thought Marriage & Depression go together like Peanut Butter & Jelly.

    I would be concerned if you weren't depressed...

    Depends on the peanut butter.

    well, if we're talking about marriage, it sure ain't smooth & creamy.
  • Carillon_Campanello
    Carillon_Campanello Posts: 726 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    I thought Marriage & Depression go together like Peanut Butter & Jelly.

    I would be concerned if you weren't depressed...

    Depends on the peanut butter.

    well, if we're talking about marriage, it sure ain't smooth & creamy.

    And after awhile it turns rancid and smells really really foul.
  • Poisonedpawn78
    Poisonedpawn78 Posts: 1,145 Member
    Happily married just means they haven't been together long enough.
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
    edited June 2017
    You all realize that the OP will never come back to this thread and probably never read it?
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    cee134 wrote: »
    You all realize that the OP will never come back to this thread and probably never read it?

    she's married; she has probably walked into traffic by now or is laying in the roadway waiting for a large bus
  • BeccaLoves2lift
    BeccaLoves2lift Posts: 375 Member
    MrsBeccaM5 wrote: »
    Lower your expectations

    The key to happiness...

    Hey you're pretty awesome wife from what I've seen lol

    Thank you!
  • tmanfromtexas
    tmanfromtexas Posts: 928 Member
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...

    some folks take themselves waaay too seriously

  • tmanfromtexas
    tmanfromtexas Posts: 928 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...

    some folks take themselves waaay too seriously

    Thats true... or it may just have been a gay thing.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...

    some folks take themselves waaay too seriously

    Thats true... or it may just have been a gay thing.

    I don't discriminate when it comes to snowflakes.

    they're all equally sensitive cupcakes in my book.....
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...

    some folks take themselves waaay too seriously

    Thats true... or it may just have been a gay thing.

    That's what my therapist said.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    work_on_it wrote: »

    Therapists make you gay:-)

    I can't stop laughing....

    Yeah and some uptight *kitten* hole flagged it. What a pity...

    some folks take themselves waaay too seriously

    Thats true... or it may just have been a gay thing.

    That's what my therapist said.

    At my first session, my therapist asked that I take a seat on their sofa.

    I replied: Ut oh....






    862efa58ecb31936ceba3b20c1388ca3.jpg
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    You can combat depression by recognizing the many good things in your life, the things that make you happy, make you positive, lift you up and keep you positive. Once you do this, you will be able to answer your own question.

    Remember...We and only we can make ourselves happy no matter what the circumstances, Those around us who we can enjoy and Love are just a bonus! :)
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    You can combat depression by recognizing the many good things in your life, the things that make you happy, make you positive, lift you up and keep you positive. Once you do this, you will be able to answer your own question.

    Remember...We and only we can make ourselves happy no matter what the circumstances, Those around us who we can enjoy and Love are just a bonus!

    .... I guess you missed the part about her being married, huh?
  • JeepHair77
    JeepHair77 Posts: 1,291 Member
    You can combat depression by recognizing the many good things in your life, the things that make you happy, make you positive, lift you up and keep you positive. Once you do this, you will be able to answer your own question.

    Remember...We and only we can make ourselves happy no matter what the circumstances, Those around us who we can enjoy and Love are just a bonus! :)

    Are you being sarcastic? Maybe you're being sarcastic.

    If you're not, please recognize that this is possibly the most unhelpful and counterproductive piece of advice you could possibly have come up with.
  • JeepHair77
    JeepHair77 Posts: 1,291 Member
    Evamutt wrote: »
    Personally , Jesus is the one who truly makes me happy, even if I'm depressed or having a rough relationship in our marriage. Been married 44yrs

    Oh, look. I was wrong.
  • Nicoleybh77
    Nicoleybh77 Posts: 10 Member
    I truly appreciate your advice. Thank you
  • Nicoleybh77
    Nicoleybh77 Posts: 10 Member
    I'm definitely not gay, but I do have a therapist. I am medicated. I've been working on my depression for years, but I still feel so low. This is what led me to wonder if maybe it's just that I'm truly unhappy in my marriage. Which breaks my heart, bc I love him and want it to work. But I'm not willing to give up a lifetime of happiness for it. I spoke to my husband today. It was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do. He was understanding and supportive. He assures me my happiness is what's most important to him. (see why I love him). I'm going to my Dr on Monday and I'm going to try one last medication. I'm going to give it a few months and work really hard on it with both my therapist and my husband. But if in the end I'm still unhappy we will talk about separation. A few months ago it was mentioned by my Dr that I show alot of bipolar symptoms. Which would explain alot. So this new medication could be life changing. Who the *kitten* knows. I'll probably die crazy and alone.
  • everher
    everher Posts: 909 Member
    I'm definitely not gay, but I do have a therapist. I am medicated. I've been working on my depression for years, but I still feel so low. This is what led me to wonder if maybe it's just that I'm truly unhappy in my marriage. Which breaks my heart, bc I love him and want it to work. But I'm not willing to give up a lifetime of happiness for it. I spoke to my husband today. It was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do. He was understanding and supportive. He assures me my happiness is what's most important to him. (see why I love him). I'm going to my Dr on Monday and I'm going to try one last medication. I'm going to give it a few months and work really hard on it with both my therapist and my husband. But if in the end I'm still unhappy we will talk about separation. A few months ago it was mentioned by my Dr that I show alot of bipolar symptoms. Which would explain alot. So this new medication could be life changing. Who the *kitten* knows. I'll probably die crazy and alone.

    Let me ask you a couple questions and I don't want you to answer I just want you to think about it. . .do these feelings predate your marriage? Think back before you met your husband, before you were together, and really try to remember if you ever felt like this before. Is it just your marriage you are unhappy with or is it everything? Do the things that should make you happy make you happy? I would think about the answers to those questions if I were in your shoes.

    My anecdotal story: I have struggled with depression all my life. When depressed everything seems 'too much' for lack of better words and nothing makes me happy. I have questioned my job, my relationship, my very existence because of depression, but then it passes (again for lack of better terms) and I realize none of that is really how I feel.

    I would work with the doctor to get the correct medication and see if you can't at least break out of this depression before making any decisions.
  • LilMsEnergy1
    LilMsEnergy1 Posts: 49 Member
    If your depressed than that will impact on your marriage. if your marriage isn't making you feel good then this could also make you feel depressed.

    You need to identify the cause of your depression to make sense of it. Book a weekend away to think about it.

    You will eventually get out of it & feel better. Although it might not feel like it just yet.
  • kclewis416
    kclewis416 Posts: 79 Member
    My first marriage didn't work out because it got boring.. but boring is the word 90% of my married friends describe marriage as well... you need change!
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    I truly appreciate your advice. Thank you

    Who's? I think mine was the best.
  • cuckoo_jenibeth
    cuckoo_jenibeth Posts: 1,434 Member
    cee134 wrote: »
    You all realize that the OP will never come back to this thread and probably never read it?

    QFT!!
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