Is it ok to ask for credit score/report before first date

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  • mrwineismybf
    mrwineismybf Posts: 4,088 Member
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    What extremely personal questions do guys ask?

    Pretty sure i cant say it on here
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    Personal questions such as? I'm curious what other people consider personal.

    I hate being asked personal questions...it just shuts me down right away...I'll tell you about me when I feel comfortable! I hate being asked "tell me about yourself" my mind goes blank and I feel 'put on the spot'.

    Questions I'd like to know (maybe not first date questions) is if there are any 'deal breakers', things I won't compromise on. From there I'd decide what type (if any) of a relationship was possible.
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  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    What extremely personal questions do guys ask?

    Pretty sure i cant say it on here

    You can, just choose your words carefully
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    What extremely personal questions do guys ask?

    Pretty sure i cant say it on here

    Well I can't draw a comparison for an equivalent question if I don't know what we're talking about

    I'm so curious now
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Vikka_V wrote: »
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    Personal questions such as? I'm curious what other people consider personal.
    .


    How dare you ask that ! Hmmmmph!

  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    All jokes aside...whats equivalent in the dating world to the extremely personal questions guys ask ...

    What extremely personal questions do guys ask?

    Pretty sure i cant say it on here

    Well I can't draw a comparison for an equivalent question if I don't know what we're talking about

    does one of the questions rhyme with: Firetruck?
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    My first guess is what's your bra size

    I have no problem with this one, but ask me what my hobbies or interests are and I shut down!
  • mrwineismybf
    mrwineismybf Posts: 4,088 Member
    Rhymes with luck, bits, and torn knee
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    Vikka_V wrote: »
    My first guess is what's your bra size

    I have no problem with this one, but ask me what my hobbies or interests are and I shut down!

    Same here. Whenever someone says, "what's your favourite movie?" I literally remember zero movies that I've ever seen.

    Same! I'm glad I'm not the only one.
    Or sometimes the only thing that comes to mind is some random movie I watched a long time ago that I have no particular attachment to, but it's the only thing that comes to mind.
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    Rhymes with luck, bits, and torn knee

    I can't come up with anything that makes sense!
    Now just write the first letter of those rhyming words, in order and maybe I'll get it?
  • Momepro
    Momepro Posts: 1,509 Member
    No! There is no way this is appropriate until you are deciding to be serious with each other! That is insanely creepy! How would I know you're not asking because you are some weird stalker or trying to steal my info?
  • Cheery83
    Cheery83 Posts: 208 Member
    Well researchers have found couples with similar credit scores are more likely to stay together than people with good compatibility measured by dating website standards. So it wouldent be a stupid consept, but it would probably be a bit of a turn off
  • FireTurtle75
    FireTurtle75 Posts: 2,014 Member
    It's an interesting concept, but I don't think it will weed out the kind of people you are concerned about. It might weed out the ones that are fiscally foolish or had some financial bad luck. But not all of those people are messed up, they are just bad with money or they could have hit a really *kitten* row of circumstances.
    A Rorschach test might be a better option. I mean if every answer to every ink blot they see is vagina, boobies or a naked picture of their mom, then you know you have one to weed out.

    Ugh true...better option...makes sense...but where can i get those

    You can actually print some cards/pics off the internet.
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  • FireTurtle75
    FireTurtle75 Posts: 2,014 Member
    I don't think there's anything wrong with asking deeply personal things considering that you're potentially measuring them up for a relationship. Not everyone is open to answering stuff like that on or before the first date though. You might just have to be patient or figure our conversation topics that would lead to them being more receptive to answering you intensely curious questions.
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    If you want to seem shallow and superficial then go for it.
  • MrStabbems
    MrStabbems Posts: 3,110 Member
    I'm perfectly ok with personal questions. Some ppl are just direct and I don't see it as a bad thing just as long as they back off if it's clearly making the other person uncomfortable.

    in fact I don't think I've ever not answered a personal question (as long as it was about me, I don't share others info)

    credit score question I would see as a tad pointless. queries about bra size would be a bit odd if out of context. if I wanted to ask a woman about her bra size I would simply steer the conversation towards weird quirks/party tricks, make a few joke ones and then say I can guess bra size, proceed go guess, most would reply with the actual size. If not we can start any game with the condition that if I win you end my ocd not knowing nightmare and tell me. Or i could just wait until later and check.

    :neutral:
  • annabel92
    annabel92 Posts: 77 Member
    Why would you ask someone for a credit report before a FIRST date?! You wouldn't ask them for their salary and bonus information before a first date, would you?!?

    Genuinely shocked.
  • laurenebargar
    laurenebargar Posts: 3,081 Member
    CMB1979 wrote: »
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Friend and i discussed this and although im not into money it may help weed out some weirdos...thoughts?

    so there are no weirdos with good credit?

    I could be wrong because i cant find the article but I swear I read at one point that something like 70% of serial killers had an above average-excellent credit score

    That's because they like to save money in the bank and their victims' teeth in a tiny, tin box.

    ahhhh it all makes sense now
  • Muscle_for_Fitness
    Muscle_for_Fitness Posts: 2,198 Member
    I don't even share my credit score with my wife.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    I assume this is online dating and not people you are meeting in person before dating.
    If a guy is asking you personal questions about your body or sex life before the first date happens then you can pass on him.
    I would probably ask about interests and values, let them know you are not looking for casual sex if you are not.
  • Chase_The_Pain
    Chase_The_Pain Posts: 255 Member
    jtegirl1 wrote: »

    Someone asked why it's ok to ask for pictures. I think it's fine to ask for a full body shot (not noodz!) because we all know that a picture of a face tells you nothing. I don't care if people think it's shallow, I want to know if the guy I'm going to meet is fit and I see nothing wrong with them wanting to see that I am what I say I am. The only time I can see someone being offended by this is if you're trying to hide something.

    For sure. The women that I have seen that only post pictures from the boobs up, likely have a 140 lb top end and a 600 lb bottom end. I get why they do it, but would they rather be honest and send you a full body picture or get embarrassed when being met in person? They just might find the right person that wants them for the way they truly are on the front end, which will shorten their whole search for a mate.
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member
    812 ladies. Hit me up. ;)

    I see your still working on improving the meager score :-). You will probably have at least one hit for each point.
  • JeepHair77
    JeepHair77 Posts: 1,291 Member
    I think you can ask whatever you want, but you have to recognize what the question says about you and your priorities. Asking a potential date for his credit score is going to send a message that you may not want to send.
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member
    edited July 2017
    I am not on the dating scene (been married for 45 years).

    If I was though, that question before or during the first date WOULD be a deal breaker.

    I was taught that discussing finances on the first couple of dates was rude or bragging.

    Wouldn't it be a bear to lose the date with someone fantastic and found out later that individual was independently solvent?
  • accidentalpancake
    accidentalpancake Posts: 484 Member
    Feel free to ask, but don't be shocked when you get stood up...
  • Kintsugi_Haikyo
    Kintsugi_Haikyo Posts: 361 Member
    If someone asked me about that on or before a fist date, that would be a huge red flag. I would avoid them like the plague.
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