Open Diaries vs Closed Diaries
Replies
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I keep mine closed and have since I first started using MPF ~4 years ago. I've considered opening it but I find myself more honest when I'm *not* being "transparent" for other people. I have no incentive to lie about or omit things I eat and drink because I have no one to impress with what a good girl I'm being. Also, eating is such a personal act, at least for me that it'd seem really weird and a little icky for anyone else to know that much detail about my life. The only other scenario where I can imagine that being normal behavior is an early-90s stalker movie.6
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mrsnattybulking wrote: »The worst thing I've done to someone with an open diary is delete them for constantly eating VLC, I'm not going to "like" your eating disorder but I wouldn't dare have said anything either; that's their business. I'm shocked to read how many (even though just a handful) have had negative comments about theirs. I'd get very vicious if someone dared give me unsolicited advice on what I put in my body haha
I was just thinking the same thing! I've never considered commenting negatively on anyone's diary. I occasionally look at my friend's diaries, out of curiosity and if I notice someone doing a great job for a while I want to see what they're eating to maybe get some new ideas. I'm surprised that people go to the effort of looking at another person's log and feeling strong enough to say something mean. Their log has nothing to do with you - you're not going to gain weight because of what someone else eats, why do you care that much?!
ETA: the general "you", not @mrsnattybulking "you"
FWIW, my diary is open and is someone want to comment on it, they could sure find something, lol. I ate a giant piece of cake a couple of days ago, for instance. I keep mine open because I want to be transparent. If I'm too embarrassed to put something in my diary for all the (MFP) world to see, I should probably not be eating it. 0 -
I'm a data junkie and I value accurate data more than people's opinions so it's open to help noobs (if they care to look) and also for the curious haha. Maybe one day I eat squeaky clean, maybe one day I binge on Wunderbars... try and get me to care about which I've chosen; I dare you (also not 'you' @DamieBird, same concept tho hehe)2
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Mine is open because I make something different for supper just about every night and it might give somebody else ideas. Cooking is my hobby. If you see an odd list of ingredients and wonder what I did with them, just message me and I'll tell ya.3
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I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.2
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SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I had the exact same thing happen with the lecture about veggies. I couldn't argue with her, because it's true!2 -
I really don't get the accountability thing, since I guess I have firm ideas about how I want to eat and don't see how having someone else looking at my diary (who may have no idea what my goals are or what my views are on nutrition) would cause me to be more likely to meet my goals.
Not that my goals are way out there (I have various calorie and macro goals, focus on cooking and experimenting with my cooking, like to eat seasonally and try to have vegetables with all meals), but I'm not someone who is more likely to eat better if someone is watching. I'm more likely to eat well if I am committed to my personal goals and reasons and make it enjoyable for myself. I tend to get a little neurotic and overly obsessive if I focus on others watching (usually I don't, even when my diary is open, as it is more often than not when I'm logging), and I guess that's why the idea of doing it to be accountable to others is one that really, really does not work for me. Why should anyone else even care how I eat; I'm the one who should care.2 -
SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I would have said, "there was lettuce and tomato on the burger".
It's so weird for someone to be the food police without any knowledge of my goals or even my budget.4 -
I would have had a different personal reaction to someone pm'ing me about my diary than I've had, but since my diary sharing incident happened on the forums (I have to add here that the overwhelming response from other posters backfired on the person who tried to shame me because my diet is quite balanced), it left a very sour taste in my mouth.
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Mine is open to friends. When I got my new fitness tracker a few months ago, it was vastly overestimating my burn. Still is a bit, but I've made adjustments. A couple folks commented I was starving myself (unsolicited). So I closed it. Then, I figured it was easier to just delete the "friends." Peace restored. 6
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i actually feel kind of apologetic that i never look at anyone's diary because i don't care. not so apologetic that i'll apologize or anything, but still i do carry this awareness that for some people in my own friend group socializing goes on around what they all ate.
so it's a bit like that being at a party thing where you're pleasant and friendly and all, but you're just that one quiet woman who sits on the end of the couch with her styrofoam cup on both knees and never says much unless she's directly called on.
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canadianlbs wrote: »i actually feel kind of apologetic that i never look at anyone's diary because i don't care. not so apologetic that i'll apologize or anything, but still i do carry this awareness that for some people in my own friend group socializing goes on around what they all ate.
so it's a bit like that being at a party thing where you're pleasant and friendly and all, but you're just that one quiet woman who sits on the end of the couch with her styrofoam cup on both knees and never says much unless she's directly called on.
lol @canadianlbs you're not alone, i can totally relate.
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I had it open at one point, it confused some people due to the way I log. I sometimes plan a multi day meal and log it all in one day making it look like I'm severely overeating, I log in several languages, I quick add random numbers not related to food to keep track of my leftover/debt calories, I sometimes log tomorrow's meal today just because I'm too lazy flip to the next day, I sometimes don't log food because I'm using another app to do a nutrient check, and log partially when I'm just trying out different meal options to see which one fits my day better making my diary look like I'm severely undereating for long stretches of time, I log foods together that make little sense just because I sometimes use an item as a stand in for another because they're close enough in calories and it's already in my daily foods...etc. Doesn't help that I occasionally have weird meals, like funnel cake for dinner or instant ramen noodles for all three meals, which gives a wrong idea about how my diet is balanced if someone doesn't bother to look at other days. Basically my diary is a mess and is not the least bit useful to other people. I have days where my diary is neat, and I sometimes take a screenshot of these days to demonstrate some point in a thread, but that's about it. I'm that person with a messy desk, but there is certain order and logic to that messiness that makes sense only to me.
I had it open, then switched to closing it, but it hasn't affected my logging. I think that my success has been similar in both cases, but I could be missing some unconscious change in food choices and logging behavior with open vs closed diary. I haven't looked closely into it to see if there is a pattern. There might be, but I'm doing well with a closed diary so I'm keeping it closed. Less stress about the possibility of having to explain my chaotic logging.1 -
MarziPanda95 wrote: »Mine is closed. If it were open, I would personally be more likely to lie. I wouldn't log all the 'bad' foods I eat because I wouldn't want to be judged.
This. I keep mine closed because I don't want to be judged by things I eat and will feel more likely to not log any of the "bad foods" that I've eaten in that day.0 -
In the beginning I had it set to open, but I do alternate day fasting and apparently that makes people froth at the mouth. EOD would be nothing or near nothing. I don't log my calorie free liquids because I am lazy and a lot of my fast days are nothing and some are something tiny. My feast days are 2200-2400. Even though I would try to explain that I am dr monitored and approved the negativity that other people had over my diary was enough to make me close it.
I really wanted to leave it open for others because there are so many posts asking about 5:2, IF, ADf. But I don't need messages telling me I am wrong about how I am losing just because they don't agree with it or don't understand it. If my Dr thought it was bad she would tell me. I don't see how people can judge something they have no experience with. I just got tired of the hassle.
So, yea, started out open, then I closed it.
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I keep mine open because I 'feel' that it keeps me honest. I'd recently been making overnight oats with 1/2 cup oatmeal. I was deliberate to use a knife edge to trim the oatmeal level with the top of the measure, but still I knew that I needed to weigh the oatmeal. Today, I finally did weigh it and found that I was using 49 rather than 40 grams of oatmeal. That's > 20% above the nutrition facts label for 1/2 cup. Lesson learned.2
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I would have said, "there was lettuce and tomato on the burger".
It's so weird for someone to be the food police without any knowledge of my goals or even my budget.
The government said the tomato on pizza counts as a vegetable, and that's good enough for me.3 -
The_Enginerd wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I would have said, "there was lettuce and tomato on the burger".
It's so weird for someone to be the food police without any knowledge of my goals or even my budget.
The government said the tomato on pizza counts as a vegetable, and that's good enough for me.
There's generally rather a lot of tomato on pizza... although "the government" also said the ketchup on your hotdog counts as a vegetable.
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stanmann571 wrote: »The_Enginerd wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I would have said, "there was lettuce and tomato on the burger".
It's so weird for someone to be the food police without any knowledge of my goals or even my budget.
The government said the tomato on pizza counts as a vegetable, and that's good enough for me.
There's generally rather a lot of tomato on pizza... although "the government" also said the ketchup on your hotdog counts as a vegetable.
Clearly, you've never seen someone like me eat ketchup. French fries - especially beer-battered ones are good, but reach divinity as as vehicle for huge dollops of delicious, delicious ketchup. If 1/2C of veg is a serving, so is 1/2C ketchup: It's concentrated!7 -
stanmann571 wrote: »The_Enginerd wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »SoulRadiation wrote: »I've had a friend who told me to eat more vegetables. It was kind of funny, but she was right. I can understand how people would be totally creeped out by people looking through their diary...but imo, it's fine and I think it helps you stay accountable and thinking more about eating well throughout the day.
I would have said, "there was lettuce and tomato on the burger".
It's so weird for someone to be the food police without any knowledge of my goals or even my budget.
The government said the tomato on pizza counts as a vegetable, and that's good enough for me.
There's generally rather a lot of tomato on pizza... although "the government" also said the ketchup on your hotdog counts as a vegetable.
Clearly, you've never seen someone like me eat ketchup. French fries - especially beer-battered ones are good, but reach divinity as as vehicle for huge dollops of delicious, delicious ketchup. If 1/2C of veg is a serving, so is 1/2C ketchup: It's concentrated!
probably more potassium too tbh. I like my fries the same way hehe1 -
I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.2 -
newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
Why not just delete the people?3 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
Why not just delete the people?
I have been. Then another one pops up acting nuts about my entries.0 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
Why not just delete the people?
This, for 1, but 2. I'd be suspicious of a 1000 calorie fitbit adjustment.1 -
stanmann571 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
Why not just delete the people?
This, for 1, but 2. I'd be suspicious of a 1000 calorie fitbit adjustment.
Agreed but it's not anybody's business but hers, unless she asks for help.
And I would be more selective of friends at that point.4 -
newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
I'd close it too under those circumstances. I don't get it, I really don't. From what I've seen posted, it seems like some people friend others just so they can make judgy comments about how their friends are managing their lives under the guise of "support". From my perspective, when a friend asks for help, you give it to them straight, otherwise it's really not up to you to follow them around managing their food and exercise choices.4 -
newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
Good for you! What you eat or don't and how much you eat is your business nobody else.1 -
newheavensearth wrote: »I'm closing my diary. Too much judgy nonsense.
I do have days of 1000 calorie burns as per my Fitbit and even though I've posted screenshots of that data I was accused of lying. I've been accused of fudging numbers on seasoning even though I go by MFP, the label, and the manufacturer website. Hey if 3 sources said it's 0 calories, it's 0 calories! This jerk was deleted.
Now I have someone questioning why I use creamer every night. I'll log the creamer, but I won't log the tea bag and hot water that went with it. They're about to go.
And the diary is about to close.
I'd close it too under those circumstances. I don't get it, I really don't. From what I've seen posted, it seems like some people friend others just so they can make judgy comments about how their friends are managing their lives under the guise of "support". From my perspective, when a friend asks for help, you give it to them straight, otherwise it's really not up to you to follow them around managing their food and exercise choices.
Yeah, totally agree, and I find unsolicited negative comments really weird in the absence of a request.1 -
I don't think it's a big deal either way. I love when my friends have it open because I can get some great inspiration and ideas. I would never judge someone's diet without them asking my opinion though.1
This discussion has been closed.
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