Is it wrong to think...

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  • staplebug
    staplebug Posts: 189
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    Is it wrong to think that my inability to stop eating bad food isn't all my fault?

    Seriously? Yes. It's your fault. You choose who you spend your time with. Looks like you have a decision to make. Keep testing your will power (will power is like a muscle, by the way. Not that it gets stronger, but that the more you work it, the more tired it will get and you WILL give in), or get some new friends. You can try to inspire your friends to be healthy, but like many of us on the site have experienced, they have to get the motivation and drive to be healthy from within themselves. Maybe get them to go out and play basketball or something every once in a while?

    What's worse is that some who actually are insecure about their weight will try and drag you down by making you feel silly for dieting and getting healthy. They may think you're being an obsessive "health nut" and that you should just relax. I've heard it from family, too. It's rough when you're the only one trying to change.
  • rebbecajean
    rebbecajean Posts: 4 Member
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    This is always so hard for me. My husband drinks five+ sodas a day and can eat twice the portion sizes that I eat with no noticeable consequence. What I've started to notice is how much better I feel eating the healthy food. Plus on pizza day I get a veggie variety. Not the healthiest but a vast improvement and try to make sure I go on a walk or eat a little less at my other meals. The other thing that I do is eat two slices then drink some water and wait 20 min. If I'm still hungry I'll have a little more but the wait usually lets my brain realize that it isn't going to starve to death with a smaller portion size.

    It's not your fault that the foods are hard to kick but it is your fault if you never try.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    1) This has to be said. You are a good writer. Your post drew me in like a funny novel about a guy trying to lose weight while surrounded by pizza-eating gamers.

    2) Keep your friends, keep poking at them and let them keep poking at you. That's how it is with lifelong friends. I'm around people I grew up with now that I've moved back to my home state, and we tear each other to pieces.

    With love. It's always meant with love.

    3) Nothing wrong with licking the pizza box when they're finished.
  • stephaniemejia1671
    stephaniemejia1671 Posts: 482 Member
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    I'm sure guys night/day is fun and all but if they do nothing but sit and eat, maybe it's best to not be around them all the time?
  • dandelyon
    dandelyon Posts: 620 Member
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    Love your post.

    If your friends are willing to go eat their takeout at the pizza place even a few times a week then that sounds like a great solution. I could not eat a few slices of pizza for a postdinner snack and just make it fit. And I'm not even trying to lose weight.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    Shouldn't have to feel like you'd get flamed on because of a life choice, it's no different than vegan's only wanting to hang around other vegan's due to lifestyle choices. Kudos for the ability to even be this way, I'm no where near that way yet.

    thanks

    I wouldn't even say it's a life choice- it just is what it is. I don't chose to have active friends- my life style finds me surrounded by them by the mere fact I spend my time being active.

    As someone said- the people around you reflect what kind of person you are. So if you look around and you aren't blown away by the quality of friends you have... maybe you should ask yourself why. I have amazing friends- some more so than others- but each one of them is special and has something unique to offer and rises to the level of awesome nerdiness and awesome EPIC ADVENTRUE time-ness.

    It's because that's what kind of lives we lead- so they over lap.

    Which is why I said it may be time to branch out and find new friends. You don't have to GIVE UP the old ones- but just make new ones and find ways to overlap things- you know- ye ole' Venn diagram and all.

    :D
  • Releven
    Releven Posts: 63 Member
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    Is it wrong to think that my inability to stop eating bad food isn't all my fault?

    Seriously?

    I forgot to mention to never take me seriously, besides right now, and even now I wouldn't :happy:
  • Mgregory723
    Mgregory723 Posts: 529 Member
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    I want to smell it, touch it, lick it, devour it and the voices inside me are calling me to it worse than the damn smeagol guy on lord of the rings, except, I know in my heart I do not want the precious.

    I want to destroy the precious...


    OMG!! I think I love you!!
  • LisaMarie8713
    LisaMarie8713 Posts: 310
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    Well, its not really that easy to be around it after you've tried hard to make good choices all day long.

    I do agree with another poster about having someone in your life to share those weekends with outside of the just the guys. A hot GF would probably spark their interest. Maybe going on a few dates and meeting people outside of them, like people in a bicycling club or some other outdoor activity will help keep you occupied and out of late night trouble.

    I find that dating is a great motivator, but I had to meet someone who enables my good behavior and not weakens my will power. I finally met someone that helps me stay on track, and we go out walking, biking, etc quite often together. Its part of our nature that once we find a significant other, we spend less time with our pals...

    That being said, if it would be a once in a while guys night, I wouldn't sweat it. I give myself breaks periodically to just have fun and eat crazy. I hang with my girlfriends and don't always count the calories. I just couldn't do it all the time...
    Good luck to you!
  • Releven
    Releven Posts: 63 Member
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    I want to smell it, touch it, lick it, devour it and the voices inside me are calling me to it worse than the damn smeagol guy on lord of the rings, except, I know in my heart I do not want the precious.

    I want to destroy the precious...


    OMG!! I think I love you!!

    :blushing: How many calories does blushing log for?
  • kmvfitness
    kmvfitness Posts: 16 Member
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    I feel like there's a lot of negativity in this thread. :|

    But ANYWAY, it definitely has a TON to do with the company you keep and the environment you create for yourself on a daily basis, which can be difficult to adapt to depending on your lifestyle. In the end, you're ultimately in charge of your own decisions, but it isn't always a piece of cake (no pun) to just drop old habits or friends who enable you. Good luck!
  • met42485
    met42485 Posts: 71 Member
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    I want to smell it, touch it, lick it, devour it and the voices inside me are calling me to it worse than the damn smeagol guy on lord of the rings, except, I know in my heart I do not want the precious.

    I want to destroy the precious...


    OMG!! I think I love you!!

    This! lol Your entire post made me literally laugh at my desk. As for advice though, it does get easier. My entire office brings in greasy Mexican for lunch and there's always extra chips/salsa/queso free for the taking in the kitchen. It gets easier to say no as you see the changes in your body/health and compare that to their never changing/ever growing physique.

    Good luck!!
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
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    Yeah, it's your fault, but you know that.

    You're making this harder on yourself by hanging out with people that have the kind of eating habits that encourage you to abandon your healthy choices, at least for one night. And you know this, too.

    Question is, what are you going to do about it?

    You could stay away from your friends - a viable option if they're more casual acquaintances.

    You could make them eat the pizza, etc, outside of your house - also a viable option, but likely to earn you some irritated looks and doesn't really teach you to handle temptation. Might be a good idea until you adjust to your new lifestyle and you feel like you can handle it. Depends on your willpower and whether you're likely to feel crushed and give up if you slip a couple of times.

    You could let them bring in the pizza, etc, and have some yourself. Either adjust your diet in advance, or compensate for it over the next day or so. This gets my vote. Lets you learn how to handle temptation in the real world, teaches you how to eat your favorite treats in moderation (eventually), and keeps you from feeling deprived of either food or friendship.
  • justanotherloser007
    justanotherloser007 Posts: 578 Member
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    Things I have tried for the super late night snack attack:

    *chewing gum - it is 10 calories and I am chewing, so it helps.
    *an orange - it is about 60 calories, doesn't dump me off the diet, but I am eating something cuz since I am not in bed sleeping (where I really should be) I am HUNGRY.
    *do something that takes up BOTH of your hands, as I am a girl - I have sewed, crocheted. As a guy, what else are you interested in besides gaming? I did WoW for 5 years, and yes I did have to quit playing.
    *I drink decaf earl grey with ideal (no calories). Sometimes, drinking really really helps me. Decaf, because it is late at night - and earl grey because evidently my tongue likes English tea like my mind likes British shows ;)
    *I know that personally I cannot say no to pizza - I cannot have one slice. It is like a bad relationship for other women. Addictive and you know it is wrong.
    *Sometimes, not often, I will not eat all day so that one meal I can have some junk food. Do I feel good about this decision? No. But I don't bust my calorie count if I know that day I will be eating late. Gotta do what you gotta do.
    *Honestly, if this were me and I had friends that didn't understand how hard they were making my life and they would not abide with the rule of "eat pizza, then come over" I would literally have to go outside and take a walk with my dogs. For other people, it's cocaine or name that drug - for me that drug is pizza.

    I totally feel you on this, house rules are probably in order. Best of luck!!
  • Releven
    Releven Posts: 63 Member
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    Willy Wonka needs to make that 3 course meal gum for when I'm craving food, minus the blueberry swelling part, I've already taken care of that myself :tongue:
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    I wish that would actually work... except the turns into a blue berry part- I am not partial to that part.
  • TheCaren
    TheCaren Posts: 894 Member
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    I think you need to explain to your friends what your goal is, and why, and then let them eat the way they want, and you just focus on you. You can't control what other people do, any more than they are controlling what you do.

    If you find you can't hang around them on a regular basis and still eat right, then hang around them less frequently and enjoy a good splurge when you go out with them.

    They are not your problem. Food is not your problem. You are your problem.

    (And I say this with all kindness because, trust me, I am well aware I AM MY PROBLEM when it comes to my eating).

    Nothing anyone around me is doing will change what I decide to do. When I decided to eat right, I learned how to shop restaurant menus BEFORE we went out so I could decide ahead of time what I was willing to eat there based on nutrition info I got online in advance. So I didn't find myself at every restaurant going "oh great, what am I going to eat". I already had two or three choices in my aresenal in advance and I made my mind up which I'd go with once I got there and decided what sounded good.
  • recentcoin
    recentcoin Posts: 18
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    Yep, I agree with the other posters. Limit your exposure to your pizza slug friends. Make some new friends who work out.

    Realization #1 - You can't control what they do.

    Realization #2 - You can control how *you* respond to the pizza/beer/video game-a-thon.

    Set aside an evening when you've been "a very good boy" and you have calories to spare. Go over, play games, eat pizza, and hang with your peeps. Just don't make a habit of doing that every night. Twice a month is probably plenty.

    And, hey, you can still invite them to come to gym or other activities that you do that don't involve pizza or sofa surfing.
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
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    I don't think that you should walk away from your friends completely, but have you thought of seeking out friends that have adopted a healthier lifestyle to hang out with from time to time? Look on meetup.com to see if there are any fitness, sports or healthy living groups in your area where you can meet others that you can be more active with.
  • gigglybeth
    gigglybeth Posts: 365 Member
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    Since they're coming over to your house and you know this, could you have some healthier snacks on hand? I don't know what kind of plan you're following, but maybe some pretzels and hummus or guacamole, or at Costco and Sam's they have big boxes of heat and eat finger foods, or even one of those huge boxes of Hot Pockets. Then they can heat them up when they want them and there aren't big, tempting pizza boxes all over the kitchen. When they are done the evidence is gone, too.

    I am going to guess that your friends really don't care what they are eating. They just want something that requires minimal effort on their part.

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