WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR SEPTEMBER 2017

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  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
    <3
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,147 Member
    Sharon~ I am so sorry you had to listen to all that,, I have listened to all that kind of stuff for 20 years..but after I found out he was having an affair ,I finally had enough, I dont think he ever thought I would divorce him..
    He found out differently and it will cost him..
    I will keep you in my prayers.. working 9-6 today and then up to take care of Faith.. will check in later...
  • lhannon062709
    lhannon062709 Posts: 1,140 Member
    dreamwriter wrote: »
    So Larry was on a roll tonight. Told me he was seriously considering leaving. He listed a number of reasons. My weight has made me disgusting. I haven't tried hard enough to stop the balding. I am too lazy to be useful. That I played it up when I had the accident so I could stay in the hospital longer. (Sure everyone wants to live on a rehab floor). That I stayed in the hospital longer when I had cancer because I wanted to be waited on hand and foot because that's what I like. (Not sure if he realizes a doctor decides how long you stay). The list went on. I am not sure what this is all about if it is the time of year again or what. All I know is I am pretty sick of it all. I asked if he wanted to go back to the counsellor because we were doing so good for so long. Apparently he doesn't need to because I am the only one with a problem. I know this problem seems petty in light of all the hurricanes, floods and fires. I am praying for each and every one of you.
    -Sharon in Lethbridge with a heavy heart.

    Sharon, dear heart, it's not petty - it's abuse. There's always something behind it--there was with Tom and there is with Larry. Verbal abuse, much like jealousy, is ALWAYS about the person making all the noise, not the person it's aimed at. However, verbal abuse is still abuse, and you do not deserve this. No one does. In Texas, we'd say, "Don't let the screen door hit you on the *kitten* on your way out."

    As Heather said, if you're not ready, start socking money away, doing whatever you need to do in order to protect your future. He needs to move in with Allie's Tom and they can be Tom and Larry and chase each other all over the house with frying pans and yell at each other.

    I know it's hard to do, and I'll tell you the same thing I told Allie: Until I looked at him and thought, "I'd rather die alone than live with you any longer," I wasn't ready. Once I did, it was all over but the packing. You'll hit your point of no return, but it's a very individual thing. Just stay safe, as verbal can turn to physical quite easily.

    Lisa
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Sharon in Lethbridge: Your problem doesn't sound petty at all. I'm sorry you're going through this conflict with Larry. (((HUGS)))

    Katla in beautiful NW Oregon
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,357 Member
    -
  • Peach1948
    Peach1948 Posts: 2,473 Member
    (((Sharon))) :'(

    Lisa said: "He needs to move in with Allie's Tom and they can be Tom and Larry and chase each other all over the house with frying pans and yell at each other." Cracked me up! LOL :)
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,294 Member
    Barbie love the new color. Glad friend is getting better.

    Michele the waitress comment makes me think others see her as you do. She sounds like she tunes others out and just does what she wants.

    ((Sharon)) no it sounds like he is the one with a problem. It is called not having manners and compassion. He is taking his frustrations out on the wrong person. I know I have said this before do not let him get to you. (easier said than done especially someone close.) I have watched school children and some of them know if they can upset someone they go for the jugular. Go do super fun things for yourself and leave him to stew in his own juice. Take care of you. You deserve it after everything else you have gone through.

    His actions is like being hit with your own hurricane. Your problems with him is not insignificant in light of everything else. It okay to be angry with him. So want to use the P word.

    :heart: Margaret
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,703 Member
    Peach1948 wrote: »
    (((Sharon))) :'(

    Lisa said: "He needs to move in with Allie's Tom and they can be Tom and Larry and chase each other all over the house with frying pans and yell at each other." Cracked me up! LOL :)

    Sharon - (((HUGS)))

    Lisa's visual of the "Tom and Larry show" was a good one!

    <3 You deserve peace in your life. <3

    We're here for you-keep us in your pocket!

    Lanette
    SW WA State
  • barbiecat
    barbiecat Posts: 17,252 Member
    <3Sharon, sending hugs to you. I think it's time for you to make a plan for yourself--bank account, credit card, where to go, what to do. You don't need to live with someone who verbally abuses you and can't see his own part in anything. Listen to the wise women on this thread.
  • josephinebowman
    josephinebowman Posts: 359 Member
    Sharon I am sorry for that man you have at your house. We are here for you.
    Well, Irma isn't coming here. And the next one isn't going anywhere from what I hear.
    Please don't feel bad for me--but prayers are always wonderful. I am getting up to clear some junk from car including my son's car seat. He is old enough and big enough to ride without it now.
    Anyone know anything about BCT Investments LLC in San Jose CAL? I received an offer to pay cash for 1 of my lots out back and while it is a silly little offer (1/10 of what I thought likely) I am wondering if it is some sort of spam mail. Why buy 1 skinny lot of the three side-by-side lots? I paid 7k for 3 about 5 years ago and this lot is the one that I ride/mow through to get to them all. The house next to it is also for sale. IMHO, it might well be torn down. I will scan the internet to see if I find this company.
    Well, off to shake a leg and some other stuff!
  • KJLaMore
    KJLaMore Posts: 2,847 Member
    Good morning! Happy Tuesday! Been reading posts and trying to keep up with what is going on with everyone.

    Allie- How unlike Tom to not show up at court! NOT! I am so glad things continue to move along for you in this process. I think, by Tom not being there, it is just proving his disregard to you and the system; and will only work to your favor. Hope after that was finished you found your headache gone!

    Becca- Happy Anniversary to you and your hubby! Best wishes to you both!

    Sharon-My heart hurts for you. :( I have to agree with Lisa and Heather, it is time for you to do something for yourself. Judging by his remarks to you; YOU are not the problem. If he is not willing to go to counseling (bc he obviously sees nothing wrong with his behavior), you need to build a better/happier life for you. If you don't decide to leave now, definitely start putting money away and/or making a plan to leave. You deserve more. What ever you decide, know that we are here to support you! Sending much love, strength and good thoughts/prayers your way <3

    Barbie-Love the colors you chose for your house! It looks wonderful! My favorite part is that cranberry colored gate! <3

    Dana- Forgot to tell you how much I loved the pic of your grandkids! They are adorable!

    Wendy- Thanks for sharing about Ernestine Shepherd! Wow! I DO aspire to be like her, although I know most people can't achieve or maintain that kind of strength and vitality that late into life; but I will continue to try. I will have to get her book as I was never an athlete as a kid and didn't start running until I was 47 and overweight. Injuries have sidelined me time and time again over the past few years, but I continue to walk/work my way back to running. It just feels so good when you do it. Nothing beats those endorphin rushes!

    Kim - Hello friend! So good to hear from you! I love thunderstorms! One of my favorite ways to get to sleep or wake up in the morning is listening to the thunder roll. If the storm is on us and the lightening strikes are close, I do get that funky metallic taste in my mouth though. Weird, but I like it!

    Gotta run! ttfn xoxo KJ (Kelly)
  • CockneyLady2014
    CockneyLady2014 Posts: 199 Member
    This looks an interesting group. I'm not new to MFP but have just rejoined. I lost my mum a year ago and it has affected me in many ways. In respect of MFP I struggled to get to the supermarket. If I managed it I wouldn't be able to cook the food I bought. This led me to not eating enough and snacking on unhealthy foods. I am just beginning to get a handle on my life. I'm aiming to plan, shop, cook and eat 3 meals a day. I want to drink 2 litres of water a day. I also want to increase my veggie intake. Oh by the way I am from Suffolk (an Eastender originally). Thank you.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,690 Member
    2017 Monthly September
    Walking Distance (km): 22.1
    Walking Time (min): 276.3
    Cycling Distance (km): 253.8
    Cycling Time (min): 754.6
    Stairs Climbed Number: 59.0
    Stairs Climbed Time (min): 47.2
    Other Distance: 0.0
    Other Time: 0.0

    Totals
    Total Distance (km): 275.9
    Total Distance (miles): 171.4
    Total Time (min): 1078.0
    Total Time (hr): 17:58:02

    __________________________________________

    I wanted to walk more today and lift weights, but the weirdest thing happened on my way to work. I was on the bus, and it was just about to leave my suburb to hit the highway into town.

    First it felt like my whole torso went into a tingly burning pain.

    Then moments later that settled a little and it felt sort of like my back cramped up really painfully (cramping is the closest description I can think of) ... especially in quite a large area around the right shoulder blade and shoulder and down the back of my right arm, the middle of my back, and across my back wrapping around to the left side of my neck and jaw. It also felt like the pain wrapped around under my right arm, to the front into my gallbladder area, on the right.

    For a little while I struggled to breathe ... I'm not sure if that was because of the pain. It hurt a lot! Or because my jaw on the left side felt like it had seized up. When the nausea set in, I thought I'd better try to take some deep breaths and that did seem to help a bit.

    I've had something like this happen once before about 3 years ago, and seemed to be OK after it.

    But I am left wondering ... what in the world?!?!?

    And I've felt sore and tired for the rest of the day, like I've done a huge workout.

    My mother (a nurse), husband and I have speculated, and think it was perhaps low electrolytes and dehydration. Mondays are rough days for me when it comes to eating and drinking. I had hardly drunk anything during the day, and then went to an intense spinning class that had us sweating pools. I have kidney stone issues, and I've got to drink regularly or my kidneys ache at the best of time. Probably a combination of all that.

    Next Monday, I must make a point to drink more!!!

    Here's to a better Wednesday!

    Machka in Oz
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,357 Member
    Ll
  • Peach1948
    Peach1948 Posts: 2,473 Member
    edited September 2017
    Barbie ~ Your house looks really cute and the colors are great together with the roof.
  • ryenday
    ryenday Posts: 1,540 Member
    edited September 2017
    Machka : be well! Put the symptoms and your self-diagnosis and anything else that may be pertinent into a log somewhere so that if indeed in 3 more years it happens again you might be able to pinpoint it. It does sound like dehydration or eloctrolyte imbalance could be the culprit from what you say, but logging all possibilities NOW could aid a diagnosis is it is something other than that.

  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,690 Member
    ryenday wrote: »
    Machka : be well! Put the symptoms and your self-diagnosis and anything else that may be pertinent into a log somewhere so that if indeed in 3 more years it happens again you might be able to pinpoint it. It does sound like dehydration or eloctrolyte imbalance could be the culprit from what you say, but logging all possibilities NOW could aid a diagnosis is it is something other than that.

    I'm actually planning to go to the Dr soon. I have to go anyway to arrange my "every 6 months cancer check ultrasound" in preparation for my "every 6 months visit with my gynaecologic oncologist" ... I figure I'll mention this while I'm visiting my Dr. Maybe see about some bloodwork. Probably time for a complete physical.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,690 Member
    cityjaneLondon wrote: »
    Just a little thing my DDIL posted today on her blog. (She didn't draw it herself) The point is, we are all different in what constitutes a "break" for us. She said she likes to go for a run, go for a walk with the kids, or walk down to the beach with the kids and visit the (excellent ) ice cream shop. :D I love to see some art, or design, and wander around a city looking at beautiful buildings and have a light meal under an umbrella. :D:D<3B) Also dancing. :D<3

    I'm with your friend ... walking down to the beach! :) Several evenings each week.

    Plus cycling.

    And photography ... and reading. :)

  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,703 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    ryenday wrote: »
    Machka : be well! Put the symptoms and your self-diagnosis and anything else that may be pertinent into a log somewhere so that if indeed in 3 more years it happens again you might be able to pinpoint it. It does sound like dehydration or eloctrolyte imbalance could be the culprit from what you say, but logging all possibilities NOW could aid a diagnosis is it is something other than that.

    I'm actually planning to go to the Dr soon. I have to go anyway to arrange my "every 6 months cancer check ultrasound" in preparation for my "every 6 months visit with my gynaecologic oncologist" ... I figure I'll mention this while I'm visiting my Dr. Maybe see about some bloodwork. Probably time for a complete physical.

    Machka,

    Please schedule the doc visit sooner than later! If you still have your gall bladder, it might be flaring up. My kidney stone hurt in the middle of my back (and my bladder - thought I was getting a bladder infection.) Yes, keep track of the symptoms and write them down while you still remember them.

    B) We and your DH need you with us for a long, long time!! <3<3

    Lanette
    SW WA State

  • langman22
    langman22 Posts: 786 Member
    Hi all,

    Rye, don't feel old at the swim fundraiser. You will impress those younger and they will be "I hope I'm like that at that age"!

    Carol - Equifax says we weren't affected. Going to tell my daughter to go there too. I agree, let the hip heal a little first.

    Lisa, the type of painting sounds like fun. Unfortunately my talent don't run in that direction. I believe everyone has something they do. They just have to keep trying things until they find the one.

    Joyce, so glad to hear the procedure went well and it is behind you (no pun intended). Good thing you had it done as it sounds like they found something. Keep us posted about the biopsy. (HUGS))

    Barbie, so glad to hear that your walking friend is fine. The house looks beautiful. Thank goodness the smoke is clearing for you. I hated to think of all of you breathing in the smoke.

    Michele in NC, I would just post all the things you did for the shower and not mention what the others did or didn't do. People will then see what you did. The others didn't do anything so will have nothing to post. I wouldn't criticize them in any way. Denise will get it without you having to mention them. I would be nothing but positive. Love the gecko.

    Kim, I'm sorry your are uncomfortable with the thunder and lightening. Hope it passes soon.

    Katla, it must be hard to see the forest burning. Such a waste and it takes them so long to grow. I hope what you are hearing is true and some are saved.

    Sharon, Oh Sharon, your husband reminds me of my ex. So hurtful. My problem was I heard it enough that I started to believe it. Don't do what I did. In your heart you know that what he says isn't true. Don't take on his issues. He owns them. Think of what's best for you. Maybe it is time to think about leaving him. Put yourself in control of the situation and not let him dictate what happens. Maybe start with talking with a lawyer to see what step need to be taken. Knowledge is power. Check out the bank accounts and make sure you have money. Start your own account if you don't already have one. It is hard as I thought about it many times but didn't have the courage to do it. Mine left me. I told him it was the best thing he ever did for me. It wasn't until he left that I realized how awful it was. Verbal abuse has no bruises that you can see but you can feel them. (((HUGS)))

    Kate, Greece?!? I'm jealous! Have fun and send pics.

    Becca, Happy Anniversary!

    Cockneylady, Welcome. What is your name? We are a good supportive group which you will find helpful.

    Machka, go to the dr now. Better to have it checked out just in case. I agree with Rye, track it in a journal.

    Heather, love the poster.

    Marcelyn, how awful for you friend and what a good friend you are. She is lucky to have you to help out. don't get the increate to property tax if the property is destroyed and that's who needs the money.

    Phew! I think I'm caught up for now.

    Terry in VT
  • ydailey
    ydailey Posts: 516 Member
    Happy Chocolate Milkshake Day!

    Maybe I'll throw a spoonful of cocoa powder into my banana smoothie to celebrate...

    Lisa - What an interesting painting technique! I really like your paintings - the color is so vibrant.

    Barbie - Isn't it amazing what a coat of paint can do? The house is looking great!

    Sharon - It sounds like you really got dumped on. I know that hurts. Do you want him to stay?

    CockneyLady - Welcome back to MFP! This is a very supportive group of women. Losing your mother is life-changing so be kind to yourself as you start to find your way forward.

    Marcelyn - It's so good of you to take in your friend, and to help her clean up the mess. Hope the insurance gets worked out soon.


    After a day of rest I woke up achy again today, so I guess it's time to suck it up and try to move through whatever is going on with my hips.

    Everybody take care.

    -Yvonne in TX
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    CockneyLady: Welcome to a great group of supportive women. :bigsmile:

    Machka: Does heart disease run in your family? Some of those symptoms sound like a cardiac situation might be a possibility but dehydration is also a logical possibility. Do you have the option of checking in with your doctor's office or an advice nurse? :flowerforyou: I'm glad to read that you're already planning a Dr. visit. Be sure to bring this event up and ask about it. :star:

    Marcelyn: You are the kind of friend that is needed in an emergency. You pitch right in and help with practical matters. Regarding appliances as structure or content, I'm guessing her flood insurance will eventually have to pay for appliances. It is too bad they're making things hard for her rather than stepping up and getting it done. :grumble: Good luck with your upper balcony project. :smiley:


    One of my former teaching colleagues lives in Hood River, Oregon, the closest town to the east of the fire in the Columbia Gorge. She and her neighbors are beginning to worry about the fire heading their way & endangering their homes. Please send good thoughts their way and put them in your prayers. Unfortunately, there seems to be no rain in sight.

    Katla in beautiful NW Oregon

    "The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another." - William James

  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,666 Member
    dreamwriter wrote: »

    So Larry was on a roll tonight. Told me he was seriously considering leaving. He listed a number of reasons.
    My weight has made me disgusting. I haven't tried hard enough to stop the balding. I am too lazy to be useful. That I played it up when I had the accident so I could stay in the hospital longer. (Sure everyone wants to live on a rehab floor). That I stayed in the hospital longer when I had cancer because I wanted to be waited on hand and foot because that's what I like. (Not sure if he realizes a doctor decides how long you stay). The list went on. I am not sure what this is all about if it is the time of year again or what. All I know is I am pretty sick of it all. I asked if he wanted to go back to the counsellor because we were doing so good for so long. Apparently he doesn't need to because I am the only one with a problem.

    I know this problem seems petty in light of all the hurricanes, floods and fires. I am praying for each and every one of you.

    -Sharon in Lethbridge with a heavy heart.

    Sharon that's horrible -- not petty at all. Those were mean things to say. I don't know what else to say -- I'm just sorry.

    Felicia
    Willamette Valley, Oregon

  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,147 Member
    I'm at work and just having lunch.. thought I would check in... Barbie your house looks adorable...have the weekend off.so might do the last bit of packing and getting things organized..
    Sharon -listen to your girlfriend's here..it took me a long *kitten* time to figure out that I am worth more than what my soon to be Ex was dishing...
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,666 Member
    edited September 2017
    Katla49 wrote: »

    Machka: Does heart disease run in your family? Some of those symptoms sound like a cardiac situation might be a possibility but dehydration is also a logical possibility. Do you have the option of checking in with your doctor's office or an advice nurse? :flowerforyou: I'm glad to read that you're already planning a Dr. visit. Be sure to bring this event up and ask about it. :star:

    Yes. I wondered the same. Best to eliminate a cardiac event then move on to the other less serious situations. Although, gall bladder problems are no joke. Mine was diseased and the pain was intense. Don't miss that thing at all!

    So, Maui is off the table (we can't make the dates work with the kiddos school schedule), so we are considering Cabo. I'm a little nervous about Mexico, but I don't ever hesitate going to Chicago . . . and Cabo has beaches. :sunglasses: (ETA, not to insult anyone from Chicago. I guess technically Chicago has beaches, too. I have sunned and played in the surf there. But it's not quite the same, for me, as a warm ocean beach.)

    Updates on New Year's vacation to continue, I am sure.

    I missed work on Friday because I was on the verge of a migraine. I was on the edge almost all weekend, and yesterday was a little difficult. I woke up this morning with a headache, so I took one migraine pill. It has codeine in it. Turns out that was a mistake. I got to work without any problems, but now that I'm here, I am having a really hard time staying awake and focused. I can't drive home until this wears off, and it would be difficult to sneak a nap in my office. :sleeping: What a blunder.

    Oh, the fire across the street from campus is out. It burned a lot -- a few buildings were lost -- but I'm not sure anyone was using those buildings anymore. The land that burned is state property -- there is a prison on either side of the field that was burning -- fortunately the fire didn't get too close to either one. The rumor is that an inmate was working in the field and accidentally caught the field on fire -- something about a spark from a tractor. They don't grow anything in that field, so I'm not sure why they had a tractor in it, or an inmate alone, but it is all speculation at this point anyway.

    Felicia
    Trying to keep upright at work this morning
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