How am I supposed to get all the good diet advice?

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Replies

  • HellYeahItsKriss
    HellYeahItsKriss Posts: 906 Member
    tinkerbellang83 wrote: »
    Cut out all zero calorie foods - they kill!

    Ooooh, right, cause those hidden 5 calories are what is keeping me fat
  • tinkerbellang83
    tinkerbellang83 Posts: 9,142 Member
    HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »
    tinkerbellang83 wrote: »
    Cut out all zero calorie foods - they kill!

    Ooooh, right, cause those hidden 5 calories are what is keeping me fat

    Exactly and giving you all sorts of cancer in the process!
  • stanmann571
    stanmann571 Posts: 5,727 Member
    VintageFeline wrote: »
    Gluten free, dairy free, low carb, high carb, raw vegan high protein, 6 meals a day, stop eating at 6pm and no carbs after lunch, no sugar unless it's natural (white sugar, despite coming from the plant sugar cane, is not allowed), no caffeine, get rid of the fake sugar drinks, no cake, lemon water and a shot of ACV first thing, BCAAs intra workout, lift heavy, lift moderate weight moderate reps, low weight high reps, do Insanity and P90X, get ones of those really expensive "greens" supplements, some garcinia cambogia and a fat burner from the local health food store. Oh and a protein shake post workout, but only if you've lifted heavy.

    Make sure to be hungry, eat bare minimum calories, run 1 hour per day and suck every last ounce of joy out of life.

    OK. Clearly you're ignoring the thermogenic effects of Turmeric. But you've got to chew the root, the powdered supplements are just enriching Big Pharma.
  • stanmann571
    stanmann571 Posts: 5,727 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    HellYeahItsKriss wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    ACV!

    Should I just drink it straight from the bottle?

    Sure. Vodka chaser, always.

    And HIIT. And HIIT. More HIIT.

    Ohhh! Unnh!

    Yes, yes, YES: Pickles! Swiss cheese! More!

    Mmmmm.

    (Sidelong glances . . . did anyone notice?)

    You've got to do at least 90 minutes of HIIT 6 days a week twice a day. Guaranteed to lose all your fat.
  • HellYeahItsKriss
    HellYeahItsKriss Posts: 906 Member
    If i complain while i chew i will burn twice the calories.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,622 Member
    edited January 2018
    Besides, I looked at your diary, and two months ago you logged somebody else's generic homemade recipe entry from the database, so that's for sure why you're not loosing wait. And you logged some entries in ounces, some in grams, and a bread "slice". Guaranteed 5 pound gain, right there. Not to mention one "medium" apple. Clairvoyant or psychic apples are all full of GMOs, and factory farmers spray them with aspartame.
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    keto, the answer to all life's mysteries is keto
  • _Captivated_
    _Captivated_ Posts: 5,669 Member
    You'll need "ItWorks!" wraps for your entire body.
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,562 Member
    _Captivated_ wrote: »
    You'll need "ItWorks!" wraps for your entire body.

    And Herbalife, Shakeology, etc.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    I think eye rolling should burn significant calories. If you pair that with shaking your head, double whammy.
  • Good_Morning_Glory
    Good_Morning_Glory Posts: 226 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    Besides, I looked at your diary, and two months ago you logged somebody else's generic homemade recipe entry from the database, so that's for sure why you're not loosing wait. And you logged some entries in ounces, some in grams, and a bread "slice". Guaranteed 5 pound gain, right there. Not to mention one "medium" apple. Clairvoyant or psychic apples are all full of GMOs, and factory farmers spray them with aspartame.

    Loosing wait is for loosers.

  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,622 Member
    Good_Morning_Glory wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    Besides, I looked at your diary, and two months ago you logged somebody else's generic homemade recipe entry from the database, so that's for sure why you're not loosing wait. And you logged some entries in ounces, some in grams, and a bread "slice". Guaranteed 5 pound gain, right there. Not to mention one "medium" apple. Clairvoyant or psychic apples are all full of GMOs, and factory farmers spray them with aspartame.

    Loosing wait is for loosers.

    Well, yah. If you follow the rite wait regiment, loosing wait is for loosers, per say.
    .
    .
    .
    Did I earn my eye roll calories? ;)
  • aeloine
    aeloine Posts: 2,163 Member
    This thread just SCREAMS for the "awesome" button back.
  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
    jne00w7ib7z2.png
  • myles1230
    myles1230 Posts: 163 Member
    Don’t worry just post, and the MFP Scientists will come.....
  • RGv2
    RGv2 Posts: 5,789 Member
    myles1230 wrote: »
    Don’t worry just post, and the MFP Scientists will come.....

    I know....thank God, am I right. There's so many helpful and knowledgeable people on this site. I've learned so much and figured out what areas l was going wrong in thanks to the knowledgeable posters here.
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