Less alcohol- February 2018- one day at a time
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Wow, has this thread picked up steam! Awesome...
I am curious to view on this question. For those who are not planning on quitting long term - what is your definition of successful / sustainable moderation?
I consider myself having a 'healthy' relationship with alcohol (beer). For probably the last 8-10 years, I never (and can't) drink until I'm drunk. I have never in my life blacked out from too much. At this stage of my life, it is a exceedingly rare occasion I ever make it past two drinks in a day. If I do, I don't desire the taste again for a month or so.
My definition today is as it has always been.. knowing when to turn it off, knowing when to dial it back and knowing when to enjoy.
What is your "happy place" for successful / sustainable moderation. How will you know you've reached it?
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Wow, has this thread picked up steam! Awesome...
I am curious to view on this question. For those who are not planning on quitting long term - what is your definition of successful / sustainable moderation?
I consider myself having a 'healthy' relationship with alcohol (beer). For probably the last 8-10 years, I never (and can't) drink until I'm drunk. I have never in my life blacked out from too much. At this stage of my life, it is a exceedingly rare occasion I ever make it past two drinks in a day. If I do, I don't desire the taste again for a month or so.
My definition today is as it has always been.. knowing when to turn it off, knowing when to dial it back and knowing when to enjoy.
What is your "happy place" for successful / sustainable moderation. How will you know you've reached it?
This is a great question. For me if I have more than 3 drinks and start smoking than that is a bad drinking binge. If I have 2 drinks get a little buzz on and STOP then be able to get up the next day without a hangover and go to the gym then that is great moderation for me and is sustainable. I am working towards that because once I get that buzz I keep going and going then the smoking begins and then hangover and then I sleep the day away. That is not good for me!5 -
@justlog that IS a good question. For me it’s to stop at 2 drinks. 2 I think is fair, most people rarely go out for just one, but two you can make last a while, and people won’t encourage you to drink more if you have two rather than one. I feel like I’ve had some alcohol, but not tipsy or drunk, and two is ok in my opinion (as long as you’re not driving!)
I’m going to try not to drink during the week, only on weekends, and stick to soft drinks if I go out for a “drink” during the week. I think that’s sustainable long term.7 -
All such great reading today. Thanks to everyone for digging so deep within yourselves and keeping on course...what ever your course maybe.
In reference to the "My Happy Place" question~~~~ mine is limiting to one drink. I know this to be so true. Two drinks start to feel good and then by three drinks the party would be on a roll. And more than not it would be rolling down hill.4 -
Wow, has this thread picked up steam! Awesome...
I am curious to view on this question. For those who are not planning on quitting long term - what is your definition of successful / sustainable moderation?
I consider myself having a 'healthy' relationship with alcohol (beer). For probably the last 8-10 years, I never (and can't) drink until I'm drunk. I have never in my life blacked out from too much. At this stage of my life, it is a exceedingly rare occasion I ever make it past two drinks in a day. If I do, I don't desire the taste again for a month or so.
My definition today is as it has always been.. knowing when to turn it off, knowing when to dial it back and knowing when to enjoy.
What is your "happy place" for successful / sustainable moderation. How will you know you've reached it?
My definition is pretty much the same as yours and that is what I am striving for. I know that more than two drinks in a relatively short time period and I am past the point of no return, and that is what I am trying to eliminate. I need to be in control of my drinking and not the other way around.
I have set my target limits based on what I have read to be a "reasonable" amount of alcohol for women: No more than 7 drinks per week with no more than 3 drinks in one day. So far (since Jan 1), I have been doing pretty well with this. I averaged one drink per day in January. I had one day that I had 4 drinks, but it was over the course of a long day, so I am not beating myself up over it. The bottom line is that so far I have been able to drink without getting drunk, have been able to account for all of my drinks (without having to examine the wine bottle the next day!), and have not had any hangovers. I am only hoping that I can continue on this path. I do not want to believe that my relationship with alcohol has to be all or nothing. So, until I have proven otherwise, I will have to just assume that I am in my happy place.6 -
Wow, has this thread picked up steam! Awesome...
I am curious to view on this question. For those who are not planning on quitting long term - what is your definition of successful / sustainable moderation?
I consider myself having a 'healthy' relationship with alcohol (beer). For probably the last 8-10 years, I never (and can't) drink until I'm drunk. I have never in my life blacked out from too much. At this stage of my life, it is a exceedingly rare occasion I ever make it past two drinks in a day. If I do, I don't desire the taste again for a month or so.
My definition today is as it has always been.. knowing when to turn it off, knowing when to dial it back and knowing when to enjoy.
What is your "happy place" for successful / sustainable moderation. How will you know you've reached it?
When my drinking no longer affects my work.
Is my main one. I no longer go to work hungover and in the long haul it saves me money.
I only plan to drink Fri/Sat.. and maybe Sun... otherwise not a drop as I can never just have one.
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RE "Sustainable moderation." Great question.
The recommendation from the CDC is less than 2 standard drinks per day for men and (sorry female friends) 1 for women. (These recommendations are highly debatable and should depend also on age, weight, and many other factors. They are trying to keep it simple.)
I love the concept of having just one alcoholic drink in an evening, but I have rarely done it because I just don't find it very satisfying. It just leaves me wanting more!
I do not plan to be dry forever; however, and I do not want to slip back into drinking daily or even weekly. So, I am considering on what occasions I will drink in moderation. I haven't really decided, but I might shoot for less than once a month, perhaps.5 -
I've been dropping alcohol for a couple of months now by replacing it will alcohol free wine and you might think well what's the point but here's the thing I believe half the thing is, sitting and feeling like your having a drink even though you are not. On a Friday I open a alcohol free bottle of chardonnay sit back and chill, in the knowledge there will be no headache to follow. I love it ....tastes like..... looks like and at 28 cals a glass well what's not to love. Tescos Eisenberg red, white and rose (not tried the red yet) I've got to the point now I prefer it to the real McCoy because it's just not worth the headache.10
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7/7 I’m feeling accomplished again today. Hubs decided to stay sober again with me this evening!
Week nights before were always ruled by will I workout or not. Well depended on what time I wanted to start drinking. I noticed more and more in the last year, I would start drinking earlier and earlier to where my workout would be eventually pushed completely aside.
I’m going to make my evening rule around my workout again and not the drink.6 -
Wow - everyone is doing so great!9
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Day 8 and loving it, I'm sleeping so well! Unfortunately, I had hoped it would help with the vertigo I've been experiencing, but apparently not - that's still there in full force.5
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I think I've reached my happy place these past few weeks. I know it sounds weird, but when I drank I would worry in advance if I knew I was going out to bars with my friends. I would worry and pray that I wouldnt drink too much and get sick, hungover, or ruin the next day. I would then negotiate with myself the few days before of how much I was going to allow myself. I'd even write "club soda" on my hand so I could see it, and tell my friends to make me drink water between drinks; I put too much worry and effort in moderating before Jan. 1st. Because once I hit past two drinks, I could not turn it off.
Now, I am in my happy place. For me, I feel so much better just simply knowing I wont drink. I wont take a sip. No negotiation , worry or anxiety about how much is too much. It's all too much for me, I'm afraid. So, I will just be content and happy not drinking, but not begrudge my husband or friends if they do.
I know alcohol for me is like the wolf in the woods waiting (great quote on this thread) . And I know I may stumble and drink again. I do miss it when I'm out, and for now, it's not nearly as much fun going out and be the only one not drinking. But I think I will get used to being social and yet not drink.
This thread is my life line. Thank you all for the tips and thought provoking questions and comments. Xo15 -
Well, I better fess up! I caved tonight....I'm in so much pain in my neck and back and I know the only thing that works for the muscle spasms is some alcohol. I tried heat, ice and advil to no avail. I know the alcohol will work though. Ugh.....Back to AF tomorrow.
In response to the above. I don't drink to feeling drunk or having blackouts or hangovers but I still feel it's an issue that I need to overcome as I just generally feel like Shiit!!6 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »I think I've reached my happy place these past few weeks. I know it sounds weird, but when I drank I would worry in advance if I knew I was going out to bars with my friends. I would worry and pray that I wouldnt drink too much and get sick, hungover, or ruin the next day. I would then negotiate with myself the few days before of how much I was going to allow myself. I'd even write "club soda" on my hand so I could see it, and tell my friends to make me drink water between drinks; I put too much worry and effort in moderating before Jan. 1st. Because once I hit past two drinks, I could not turn it off.
Now, I am in my happy place. For me, I feel so much better just simply knowing I wont drink. I wont take a sip. No negotiation , worry or anxiety about how much is too much. It's all too much for me, I'm afraid. So, I will just be content and happy not drinking, but not begrudge my husband or friends if they do.
I know alcohol for me is like the wolf in the woods waiting (great quote on this thread) . And I know I may stumble and drink again. I do miss it when I'm out, and for now, it's not nearly as much fun going out and be the only one not drinking. But I think I will get used to being social and yet not drink.
This thread is my life line. Thank you all for the tips and thought provoking questions and comments. Xo
I can't wait until I get to that place where I dont feel anxiety about hanging out with friends at a bar or dinner. And going through the mental struggle of should i drink not drink how much to drink.....4 -
Old Soaker Blueberry Soda in a stem glass. No questions, no strange looks and no hassles. Guess they all assumed it was red wine (lol and I don't even drink wine)
Thanks bartender for being my hero.5 -
Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »Another day without wineries (wine calories). Yay me!
And another day down. Whoot!4 -
Alatariel75 wrote: »Day 8 and loving it, I'm sleeping so well! Unfortunately, I had hoped it would help with the vertigo I've been experiencing, but apparently not - that's still there in full force.
When I had the vertigo badly I had the same hope. Sorry it's not helping your either.3 -
Went to a new bible study w some moms I met through my kids school - I was thinking weds will be great, and alcohol free. Nope they broke out the wine lol. I didn’t have any but it was pretty funny. And pretty much all the women there (late 30s early 40s) I think are pretty regular drinkers - probably not heavy but frequent. It’s a wine wine world it feels like.
Three great thing was that before Dry January I would have never turned down wine! But I didn’t feel like it!5 -
SanDiegofitmom wrote: »
Ha! I drank more than I planned. Not terrible but looking forward to a nice dry workweekWon't bore you with details, but things went completely off the rails yesterday at the Super Bowl gathering I went too. Wayyyyy too much eating and drinking. I'm not gonna dwell on it. Today's another day. My goal was to stay dry Mon-Thurs so here we go!
you’re not alone!
Also, I woke up a ton last night and thought “drinking is dumb” ha
Pretty much any time i over-do alcohol i do the exact same thing. Spend half the night in a mental loop thinking: "Alcohol is dumb. I am dumb. Did i say/do something dumb? Why was that extra glass or two neccesary? What a waste."
Nights i dont drink or drink a moderate amount-no such negative thinking or feeling!
On the days i plan to drink now i try to really focus on that aspect before i even pour a glass. I try to remind myself that i want to enjoy alcohol to feel happy/fun/fine/in control and REMEMBER my fun times with friends etc.
I planned to, and did drink a fair bit at superbowl party over many hours but literally remembered every 1:1 conversation i had with about 20-30 different friends. And i left before the "after party" which was crucial to me staying in control and getting a normal night of sleep. No negative loop of regret.
Now to stay on the sober streak for a few days. This is getting (a little) easier with each success.
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