how do you really succeed at this?

chandraminick

If you are female and in your mid 40s, at least 50 lbs overweight, have something hormonal going on like PCOS, and you really want to get it together and be a real success story before 50 with great muscle and a slim body, how do you really get it done? I'm tired of being unhappy and disappointed in the body I'm in. As pathetic as it may sound, I know yhat achieving this is the only real thing in my life that is going to make me happy. I'd like to hear from someone who really knows what it takes to get it done.

livingleanlivingclean

You want it badly enough to be consistent with your logging, and eating in a deficit. Don't set unrealistic goals (too rapid or too restrictive) and learn the art of patience

chandraminick

I know there's more to it than that. Who do I look to learn how to train? I'm in rural Idaho, and there's a Golds gym, but I don't see a following for anything close to body building for women, and I've always thought that what the way to get it. Maybe, I'm wrong, and under the wrong impression.

motivatedmartha

Nope - there is no more to losing weight than eating fewer calories than you use (CICO) Read through the pinned posts at the top of each message board. Then follow the guidleines mfp provides re your calorie targets. Keep to that target and you WILL lose weight - but it may take time. No quick fix pills. Eat leass than you use and it will work. The process is simple - not easy. The simpler you keep it the more likely you are to stick to it. Eating nutrient dense foods (some call these 'healthy foods') helps to keep you well and more satisfied. In theory you will lose weight even if you were to eat your entire calorie allowance in Mars bars - but you will end up feeling terrible! To increase the number of calories you have to play with you can use exercise but make sure you are being real about the amount your exercise uses. You can lift weights but you don't have to. You can walk, swim, cycle, anything to move more than you used to. Put the exerices you have chosen to do that day into your diary and it will give a suggested calorie burn based on your stats. Most people opt to eat back half of those exercise calories (mfp can be overly generous on some exercise). You may find it helpful to make some mfp friends to support you on your journey - choose people who will share their diaries as it may give you a better idea of how others are doing it.

In summary - Eat less than you did while overweight and move more! Mfp has hundreds of members who have succeeded. Good Luck.

JeromeBarry1

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10257474/starting-out-restarting-basics-inside

try2again

chandraminick wrote: »

I know there's more to it than that. Who do I look to learn how to train? I'm in rural Idaho, and there's a Golds gym, but I don't see a following for anything close to body building for women, and I've always thought that what the way to get it. Maybe, I'm wrong, and under the wrong impression.

The notion that "there's got to be more to it than that" is actually what often causes people to fail.

Note that you are talking about two different issues- weight loss and body building. For weight loss, all you need is a consistent, reasonable calorie deficit. No special foods, eliminating certain foods, shakes, supplements, special meal timing, none of it. For body building, you likely do want to follow a plan, and there are good threads here on that, but that's a different topic.

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10332083/which-lifting-program-is-the-best-for-you/p1

dkg_motivate

Long term goals are hard. We get on the scale daily and expect a result and get frustrated when it doesn't happen and then give up. Make a goal. Write it down. Take weight and measurements. Write them down. Pick a weigh in day, weekly or biweekly. Mine is biweekly and I refuse to get on the scale on the other days. Healthy weight loss is 1-2 pounds a week. Every weigh in day also take measurements and compare to your last weigh in and your beginning weigh in. Remember how far you've come and the slower the weight comes off remind yourself the more likely it'll stay off and don't get discouraged. Read those goals daily without getting bogged down on the numbers on a scale daily. ❤❤ you can do it! Don't wait, and stick with it. I'm 30 pounds down in 17 weeks, 5 inches from my waist, no exercise yet. Simply eating fewer calories than I burn. Still have 50 more to go. But now that I'm getting smaller and my knees are feeling better I'm going to start incorporating exercise to get stronger and healthier.

LivingtheLeanDream

You have to find a way to consistently take in less calories than you burn.. and you have to want to lose weight badly enough. Where there's a will there's a way.

serindipte

Eat fewer calories than you burn. - Weight loss
Lift heavy things. - Muscle preservation.
Eat plenty of protein. - Muscle preservation and satiety.
Eat ample fats. - Satiety and health.

After you're nearer to your goal weight, look into body recomp for the actual muscle build.

You aren't going to build significant muscle while eating in a deficit.

chandraminick

try2again wrote: »

chandraminick wrote: »

I know there's more to it than that. Who do I look to learn how to train? I'm in rural Idaho, and there's a Golds gym, but I don't see a following for anything close to body building for women, and I've always thought that what the way to get it. Maybe, I'm wrong, and under the wrong impression.

The notion that "there's got to be more to it than that" is actually what often causes people to fail.

Note that you are talking about two different issues- weight loss and body building. For weight loss, all you need is a consistent, reasonable calorie deficit. No special foods, eliminating certain foods, shakes, supplements, special meal timing, none of it. For body building, you likely do want to follow a plan, and there are good threads here on that, but that's a different topic.

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10332083/which-lifting-program-is-the-best-for-you/p1

This did help. I've gone to the link and started there. Thank you.

chandraminick

Thanks, everyone for the responses. I have a huge mental block right now. I can only focus on one thing at a time whether it be work, working out, problems or whatever. I think I am going to have to get rid of all the distractions again to get back in my groove. About three years ago, I got rid of computer games and television. I had success in four months of about a 40 lb loss eating at a defecit, logging my food, doing Jillian Michaels 30 day shred back to back twice. I was still getting results, but I messed myself up by switching to a program that was too hard, quitting, and then not maintaining. So much of this is mental, and I think I'm gonna have to get rid of the distractions again.

seltzermint555

You know yourself better than anyone else. And I definitely can't speak on the hardcore working out stuff, because I haven't done that. But as far as weight loss goes, I know for me the best was not being like super strict and black/white with food being good/bad. Now it's actually just moderation through counting calories, which is so simple, that has kept me from regaining a major weight loss (over 100).

In your post above I recognized a lot of what one of my friends did. When she was going through a divorce 3 years ago, she lived in a small apartment with no TV and even no internet aside from her smartphone on cell data. She went to the gym every night after work. She ate 1 large meal per day and maybe a small snack if she was lightheaded during the work day. She lost weight rapidly and worked out extremely frequently. As soon as she changed her lifestyle back to a more moderate and social level, all her progress went out the window. Sometimes I think instead of hyperfocusing on 1 area of life and/or cutting all distractions, it can be very beneficial to seek balance and moderation in all things. Just another view.

bonniebug50

Hi
What part of Idaho do you live in? I’m in Idaho as well, working on losing 30 pounds that have been haunting me for a while, funny I know how to lose weight and be healthy, I just know I lack consistency! Good luck on your journey!

djeffreys10

Unless you have a doctor telling you there is something hormonal going on, there is nothing hormonal going on. Yes, I know there must be something going on before the doctor says so. But too many people use that excuse without actually having a diagnosis. See a doctor. Get diagnosed. Until you have a legit diagnosis, assume there is nothing wrong with you and proceed accordingly.

fitoverfortymom

I've lost 100lbs.

I'm 43.

Once I was ready and willing to do the work and stick wit hit, all I did was set my MFP weight loss settings, got a food scale to measure my portions, and logged my calories honestly every day.

kenyonhaff

chandraminick wrote: »

I know there's more to it than that. Who do I look to learn how to train? I'm in rural Idaho, and there's a Golds gym, but I don't see a following for anything close to body building for women, and I've always thought that what the way to get it. Maybe, I'm wrong, and under the wrong impression.

You don't need to go to a gym to get fit. Plenty of us here don't.

For example, I'm 44, I've lost 45 pounds and kept it off for 6 months now.

What I primarily do is:

Walking (30-60 minutes)
Dancing (using Just Dance on Nintendo Switch)
Classical Stretch (on PBS) a 30 minute stretching & strengthening program

There's a real misperception that you have to train at competitive labels or go to a health club or expensive yoga studio to lose weight and get fit. NO. You can do just fine with moderate exercise.

workinonit1956

Yeah, it’s really just a matter of eating fewer calories than you burn. Exercise is good too for many reasons. I’m 62 and am down 28 pounds since January. I just log my foods daily, walk 5 days a week in my neighborhood, and practice Pilates on my reformer at home.

lionessroar1

As everyone has said, eat less and do more. I do daily yoga and now the snow's finally gone I'll be walking every day, too. I look forward to losing a pound a week but I've given up the emotional roller coaster of weighing myself daily or even more. I don't value myself by numbers on a scale any more but by the way I treat my body, including the love I give it. Good luck. You have a lot of support here.

gg3975

Eat less
Find exercise you enjoy
Don’t quit

NGentRD

Patience
Accountability

CSARdiver

Be better today than you were yesterday. Repeat.

It's that simple. Doesn't require a gym, trainer, personal chef. Just you.

Your brain will quit long before your body will. The trick is retraining your brain that the limits you set for yourself are not real and can be broken.

amgreenwell

Agree with so many other posters. If you want it bad enough you just buckle down and do it. You resist temptation and you make yourself the priority.
There are no tips and tricks, there is only eating at a deficit and making your calorie goal each day. If you want to tone up or exercise then more power to you...and the more you get to eat.
I'm over 40, have two kids under 2 and I'm making myself the priority right now. I want to be around a long time for my kids and be the healthy example in their lives. This is not something I'll compromise on.
Accept that attitude and you can make it happen. I hope you can find some happiness in your life though.

quiksylver296

chandraminick wrote: »

I know there's more to it than that. Who do I look to learn how to train? I'm in rural Idaho, and there's a Golds gym, but I don't see a following for anything close to body building for women, and I've always thought that what the way to get it. Maybe, I'm wrong, and under the wrong impression.

Blackfoot isn't that rural.

Eat at a slight calorie deficit.

Lift heavy (for you) weight.

Put on your patient pants and your consistent shirt.

Styggian

serindipte wrote: »

Eat fewer calories than you burn. - Weight loss
Lift heavy things. - Muscle preservation.
Eat plenty of protein. - Muscle preservation and satiety.
Eat ample fats. - Satiety and health.

After you're nearer to your goal weight, look into body recomp for the actual muscle build.

You aren't going to build significant muscle while eating in a deficit.

All good advice above me, serindipte given great bullet point summary.

chandraminick

OK, everyone. I went back to all these things suggested here. I am also eating back all of my exercise calories as well as planning my meals in advance. I'm logging all my food and exercise not exceeding my calorie goal.

graysmom2005

consistency

iowalinda

chandraminick wrote: »

OK, everyone. I went back to all these things suggested here. I am also eating back all of my exercise calories as well as planning my meals in advance. I'm logging all my food and exercise not exceeding my calorie goal.

I don't eat back my exercise calories. I know many eat back some, but most do not eat back all of their exercise calories. If you find that you are not losing, eating back all the exercise calories could be the reason, as it's easy to over calculate calorie expenditure.

mk2fit

@chandraminick I am rural, live on a farm. I am probably older than you, doesn't matter. I lost 70ish pounds doing the CICO thing. It is not as bad as it seems. Walk a couple of miles every day. There are tons of exercise videos on youtube - surely you can find some you will actually do. You may find you like running or swimming or the elliptical or some other machine.
Find your passion. Log your food. Learn how to cook "Skinny" and eat what you love in moderation.
Oh, I have been on maintenance for about three years. You can do this!

VUA21

I'm 42, female, mom. I've lost nearly 200lbs.

Eat fewer calories than you use. Don't "diet", just eat smarter to develop habits that you can keep for the rest of your life. Incorporate exercises that you enjoy, even if it's just dancing in your kitchen while making dinner.

That's it. It takes a lot of patience, there will be good days and bad, just keep going.

AnvilHead

VUA21 wrote: »

I'm 42, female, mom. I've lost nearly 200lbs.

Eat fewer calories than you use. Don't "diet", just eat smarter to develop habits that you can keep for the rest of your life. Incorporate exercises that you enjoy, even if it's just dancing in your kitchen while making dinner.

That's it. It takes a lot of patience, there will be good days and bad, just keep going.

^ Good answer.

elisa123gal

As we get older, we actually believe our excuse that our body is broken. Like we are stuck being overweight for some reason; age, thyroid, pcos, slow metabolism...you name it..

In the end, they're all excuses. You can lose weight and get fit at any age. i'm almost at goal, and i feel i have lost at the same pace as many years ago. It just took me sticking with a plan, working it honestly,and measuring the outcomes..(not hiding from the scale).

The first step to success to taking responsibility for where you're at ..and accepting that you got yourself there...and only "you" can get yourself out and to where your want to be.

Only you can do this!