The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
Replies
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Wishing everyone a Happy Wonderful Saturday! 26 days AF and feeling great!8
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@whitpauly and @bulldogopa Yep, I'm on the caffeine free wagon and it has to be for good. I wish I could say it's as simple as saying no to a cup of coffee but it's deeper than that. It hurts and is embarrassing for me to write this but must be strong as we all are about alcohol. I've been addicted to caffeine pills for over 15 years. Those little Jet Alerts or Awake pills that are 200mg each. I was taking 8 a day. Four in the morning and four at night. I've known I've had issues that needed to be dealt with but too weak then and needed focus on other issues before facing this one. 2019 has to be the year I face this one. Fighting alcohol and caffeine in 2019! I got this!13
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Bulldog is 100 percent correct........I never got to the point of no return, but started to see flags. The max I could drink is maybe 3 glasses of wine, my body just cant handle alcohol. The other spirits, ie, scotch, gin , rum, etc...I never drank,it would be like drinking turpentine.........
I don't have any inclination, no desire, nada....there is wine in the fridge today, and beer.......not mine. I haven't drank since April 2018, and before that it was a minimum time........I really never drank heavily for the simple fact that I saw the damage it does.......to family, friends, career and heath.........health and family are the most important reasons. My father was an abusive alcoholic , his father and so was his father.....didn't want to turn out like them.......The desire and compulsion will eventually fade........
I am writing this to support Bulldog when he says ,,,,,,,,,you just forget about it.....it will happen. For me, after a few weeks, it meant nothing.......
the guilt, the anxiety, being afraid of what I could have said or acted.........the rush of a drink isn't worth it.......
best wishes and thank each and everyone of you for your posts...........I read them and they inspire me to stay focused....11 -
@MrSunshinez Thank you for your courage & honesty revealing what you feel is embarrassing but necessary for you to share. It's no different than any other addiction/habit. And I'm glad that you are realizing the negative effect it has on you and you're kicking it to the curb.
I had a flashback to my Mother when you mentioned "Awake" pills. I'm not sure when she began taking them, but I think it may have been after she fell asleep driving the school bus...thank goodness she was on her way home and there were no kids on her bus, but she did go in the ditch. She took them regularly after that when she felt the "need." I totally forgot about that memory until you triggered it with your comment. It all seems so harmless until the dependency forms, and rather than solve the problem it becomes the problem.7 -
Due to highly stressful home situation, I have zero desire to drink. I dont want to feel worse than I already do, if that makes sense. I would have thought, I’d turn to the bottle during this problem, but it has had the opposite effect which is a good thing. I will continue AF into Feb. and beyond and drink on rare occasions. (Once a month perhaps) It is so much better to face life’s challenges with a clear mind and strong body. Sounds like every one is right where they want to be.
I can relate to above statement by @lloydrt that my body just cant handle alcohol. Even two drinks gives me a racing heartbeat all night and wicked nausea the next day. I just can’t deal with that. It is scary.11 -
One more reflection : Sunday mornings are so joyful these days. My daughter and I have been sitting at Starbucks on Sundays and doing the word puzzles together from the newspaper. It is heaven not to be sitting there with a hangover.10
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@lloydrt - This time has been easier for me for an interesting reason. I quit and started back several times over the years, always thinking I had proved to myself I had it under control. So it was always in the back of my mind that I would drink again. This time I decided I can't keep doing that so this is for good. 580 days. I only know the count because I look it up. I don't think about it every day. I have it around me a lot. There is one situation in particular where I could absolutely get away with it but I don't give it a second thought anymore. Guarantee? No such thing. But I like my odds right now.8
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Happy Saturday night, AF friends! Been quite sick the last few weeks and haven’t checked in properly BUT I did want to belatedly share that Thursday was my 6th month sober-versary ☺️ I am grateful for all of you and how honest and vulnerable and excellent you are. You’re inspiring, day in and day out 💙14
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MrSunshinez wrote: »Hi everyone! I've been MIA but still sober. Day #27 AF and Day #3 of no caffeine. Honestly, the caffeine is harder to give up because it's everywhere and so acceptable to have. I just can't for myself anymore. Glad to read everyone's progress as every day sober is so worth it more ways than one. I like how everyone has been calculating the savings. That's a good motivator!
I'm trying to give up caffeine too because of my sleep problems and anxiety and it is hard. I rarely drink coffee but I'm a bit of a tea addict and it has nothing to do with the caffeine, it's the taste. For home I ordered a bunch of caffeine-free and herbal teas online (including chicory tea which is a substitute for coffee and I think it's actually better). Although my MIL gave me some green tea bags the other day which have caffeine.
But it's so hard eating out. Unsweetened iced tea is my go-to beverage pretty much everywhere. Like what am I going to do, NOT have iced tea?! We also go to Starbucks pretty frequently to do work because my husband likes working there, and buying a beverage there is pretty much just the cost of free wi-fi. The only herbal teas that they have at most places are hot and they make the water so hot that it's not enjoyable. At Starbucks it takes literally an hour for the tea to cool down enough to drink it. Plus the teabags are plastic which can't be good in terms of chemicals.
But I have cut back a lot. I used to drink 32oz of unsweetened iced black tea from Dunkin' Donuts every day...and sometimes even more later. I would literally take my quart mason jar there to save on plastic waste and the workers would think it was hilarious. Now on most days I have 32oz of caffeine-free or herbal tea at home (which saves money too). When we do go out, I get green tea if possible, and (usually) only have one iced tea instead of two. I also swore off Panera tea for life because it is seriously as strong as coffee! The last time I had it I think I was up until 7 or 8 AM!
It hasn't actually improved any of my sleep problems though
As for alcohol, I guess it's 135 days for me now, if I did the math right. I didn't even have a substance abuse problem but still have zero regrets.8 -
@RubyRed427 I hope the home situation evens out and you can get back to a sense of normalcy. Congrats on hanging on to AF. Home stress can seem like the worst sometimes because it's home. Hang in there.
@lorrainequiche59 I'm sorry to have brought back a painful memory. Hopefully, she was able to get off of them eventually.
@laurenq1991 Glad to hear you found other ways to enjoy meals and have a AF drink when eating out. I think I will get the green tea like you suggested when I go out to eat.
I'm back to Day #1 tomorrow. Definitely not AF tonight. I'm so disappointed in myself. I had a date tonight that involved a social gathering first then pizza with a movie afterwards. I'm an introvert and the social setting set me off. The sad part was everyone had left and then I started drinking. I had four beers so I suppose it could have been worse but it's still a relapse. Years ago I wouldn't have had a problem but now? Why now? Kicking myself into tomorrow called Day #1 again.11 -
Hi team, so yesterday my first relapse. Managed to stay dry in all my business travelling and that was like a miracle come true. But yesterday lunch with friends and beer, wine and scotch to finish, not massively drunk but tipsy enough. Today I have only a light hangover but feel like crap anyhow.
Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.14 -
Happy Saturday night, AF friends! Been quite sick the last few weeks and haven’t checked in properly BUT I did want to belatedly share that Thursday was my 6th month sober-versary ☺️ I am grateful for all of you and how honest and vulnerable and excellent you are. You’re inspiring, day in and day out 💙
I hope you feel better soon! Congratulations and what an accomplishment, VERY happy for you and your six sober-versary!!!! You are an inspiration! Have a wonderful 😊 💜 Sunday!!!7 -
@Mrsunshinez Don’t kick yourself too hard! You have been making great healthy choices. 😃7
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Lastchancetochange wrote: »Hi team, so yesterday my first relapse. Managed to stay dry in all my business travelling and that was like a miracle come true. But yesterday lunch with friends and beer, wine and scotch to finish, not massively drunk but tipsy enough. Today I have only a light hangover but feel like crap anyhow.
Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.
That’s how it goes sometimes. And someone referred to it as a “lapse” instead of relapse which I thought is a better word. Now you can beat 22 days. Something to shoot for. Wishing you a happy day today.7 -
MrSunshinez wrote: »@RubyRed427 I hope the home situation evens out and you can get back to a sense of normalcy. Congrats on hanging on to AF. Home stress can seem like the worst sometimes because it's home. Hang in there.
@lorrainequiche59 I'm sorry to have brought back a painful memory. Hopefully, she was able to get off of them eventually.
@laurenq1991 Glad to hear you found other ways to enjoy meals and have a AF drink when eating out. I think I will get the green tea like you suggested when I go out to eat.
I'm back to Day #1 tomorrow. Definitely not AF tonight. I'm so disappointed in myself. I had a date tonight that involved a social gathering first then pizza with a movie afterwards. I'm an introvert and the social setting set me off. The sad part was everyone had left and then I started drinking. I had four beers so I suppose it could have been worse but it's still a relapse. Years ago I wouldn't have had a problem but now? Why now? Kicking myself into tomorrow called Day #1 again.
Hi. Keep going! It is the past. Might have to protect yourself in the early stages of AF and venture into places you can do, with people you can do them with and adventures that aren't triggers. Sometimes what wasn't a trigger can become a trigger. You are learning how to have a plan and escape route at all times. We aren't disappointed in what happened. If there is a definite problem with alcohol I heard that it is a progressive "thing" with it getting worse and worse as we go. I had so many restarts and then I got it down enough to string one day at a time together.7 -
laurenq1991 wrote: »MrSunshinez wrote: »Hi everyone! I've been MIA but still sober. Day #27 AF and Day #3 of no caffeine. Honestly, the caffeine is harder to give up because it's everywhere and so acceptable to have. I just can't for myself anymore. Glad to read everyone's progress as every day sober is so worth it more ways than one. I like how everyone has been calculating the savings. That's a good motivator!
I'm trying to give up caffeine too because of my sleep problems and anxiety and it is hard. I rarely drink coffee but I'm a bit of a tea addict and it has nothing to do with the caffeine, it's the taste. For home I ordered a bunch of caffeine-free and herbal teas online (including chicory tea which is a substitute for coffee and I think it's actually better). Although my MIL gave me some green tea bags the other day which have caffeine.
But it's so hard eating out. Unsweetened iced tea is my go-to beverage pretty much everywhere. Like what am I going to do, NOT have iced tea?! We also go to Starbucks pretty frequently to do work because my husband likes working there, and buying a beverage there is pretty much just the cost of free wi-fi. The only herbal teas that they have at most places are hot and they make the water so hot that it's not enjoyable. At Starbucks it takes literally an hour for the tea to cool down enough to drink it. Plus the teabags are plastic which can't be good in terms of chemicals.
But I have cut back a lot. I used to drink 32oz of unsweetened iced black tea from Dunkin' Donuts every day...and sometimes even more later. I would literally take my quart mason jar there to save on plastic waste and the workers would think it was hilarious. Now on most days I have 32oz of caffeine-free or herbal tea at home (which saves money too). When we do go out, I get green tea if possible, and (usually) only have one iced tea instead of two. I also swore off Panera tea for life because it is seriously as strong as coffee! The last time I had it I think I was up until 7 or 8 AM!
It hasn't actually improved any of my sleep problems though
As for alcohol, I guess it's 135 days for me now, if I did the math right. I didn't even have a substance abuse problem but still have zero regrets.
Congratulations!6 -
Lastchancetochange wrote: »Hi team, so yesterday my first relapse. Managed to stay dry in all my business travelling and that was like a miracle come true. But yesterday lunch with friends and beer, wine and scotch to finish, not massively drunk but tipsy enough. Today I have only a light hangover but feel like crap anyhow.
Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.
Ok team member, keep going! New day, new way! Yes day by day, second by second! 22 days, you definitely can do it again and better!4 -
@LC0924 Congratulations! I know you are feeling much healthier and reaping the benefits! Thanks for sharing!5
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RubyRed427 wrote: »Lastchancetochange wrote: »Hi team, so yesterday my first relapse. Managed to stay dry in all my business travelling and that was like a miracle come true. But yesterday lunch with friends and beer, wine and scotch to finish, not massively drunk but tipsy enough. Today I have only a light hangover but feel like crap anyhow.
Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.
That’s how it goes sometimes. And someone referred to it as a “lapse” instead of relapse which I thought is a better word. Now you can beat 22 days. Something to shoot for. Wishing you a happy day today.
Thanks ruby, healthy day today, actually not feeling too good. But again all week jetting around Europe so another firedrill till friday.
Today safe.5 -
Happy Sunday all,lost another post,grr but basically it said don't beat yourself up for lapsing(thanks Ruby) guilt can sometimes only keep us in the drinking pit! Dust off,move on,be happy
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MrSunshinez wrote: »Kicking myself into tomorrow called Day #1 again.
HAPPY Day one!!RubyRed427 wrote: »One more reflection : Sunday mornings are so joyful these days. My daughter and I have been sitting at Starbucks on Sundays and doing the word puzzles together from the newspaper. It is heaven not to be sitting there with a hangover.
Awesome!! that you are chasing your joys in spite of difficulty at home. What a good example for your daughter. BIG hugsLastchancetochange wrote: »Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.
22 days with a hiccup and now you're on to your "new streak!!"Happy Saturday night, AF friends! Been quite sick the last few weeks and haven’t checked in properly BUT I did want to belatedly share that Thursday was my 6th month sober-versary ☺️ I am grateful for all of you and how honest and vulnerable and excellent you are. You’re inspiring, day in and day out 💙
HAPPY Sober-versary!! I L VE that!!! I may steal that in future LOL...hope you are ending & healing promptly! 6 -
Happy Saturday night, AF friends! Been quite sick the last few weeks and haven’t checked in properly BUT I did want to belatedly share that Thursday was my 6th month sober-versary ☺️ I am grateful for all of you and how honest and vulnerable and excellent you are. You’re inspiring, day in and day out 💙
amazing....I didnt know you were that far along4 -
lorrainequiche59 wrote: »MrSunshinez wrote: »Kicking myself into tomorrow called Day #1 again.
HAPPY Day one!!RubyRed427 wrote: »One more reflection : Sunday mornings are so joyful these days. My daughter and I have been sitting at Starbucks on Sundays and doing the word puzzles together from the newspaper. It is heaven not to be sitting there with a hangover.
Awesome!! that you are chasing your joys in spite of difficulty at home. What a good example for your daughter. BIG hugsLastchancetochange wrote: »Day by day. We managed 22 days, so new streak on the way.
Cheers.
22 days with a hiccup and now you're on to your "new streak!!"Happy Saturday night, AF friends! Been quite sick the last few weeks and haven’t checked in properly BUT I did want to belatedly share that Thursday was my 6th month sober-versary ☺️ I am grateful for all of you and how honest and vulnerable and excellent you are. You’re inspiring, day in and day out 💙
HAPPY Sober-versary!! I L VE that!!! I may steal that in future LOL...hope you are ending & healing promptly!
Thanks!!!3 -
You are doing great!
Keep going Ruby. Sounds hard, but you have a great attitude about the situation!5 -
Hi everyone.. I ruined my 18 day streak.. I wasn't all that angry with myself at first, but it continues to grow as the day goes on. I don't want to feel this disappointment again.. It felt good to not have any guilt for the last 18 mornings.. I think the hardest thing for me right now is to not hang onto the bad feelings and just move on.. Hopefully when I wake up tomorrow, I'll be back to feeling ok about myself.. Congrats to everyone who continues to remain AF.. And to those who put themselves out there today after having alcohol, thanks for doing it. It made me feel more open to sharing.9
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@Yellowstone1983 Thanks for sharing! Keep going! Yes, you are disappointed, but if you stay stuck you may drink again! Quickly just start again!6
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Yellowstone1983 wrote: »Hi everyone.. I ruined my 18 day streak.. I wasn't all that angry with myself at first, but it continues to grow as the day goes on. I don't want to feel this disappointment again.. It felt good to not have any guilt for the last 18 mornings.. I think the hardest thing for me right now is to not hang onto the bad feelings and just move on.. Hopefully when I wake up tomorrow, I'll be back to feeling ok about myself.. Congrats to everyone who continues to remain AF.. And to those who put themselves out there today after having alcohol, thanks for doing it. It made me feel more open to sharing.
You didn’t ruin anything. Hope you had fun and tomorrow you will say “Ok, now it’s day1”. And get back on track. You made such great strides during those 18 days, I’m sure you will be able to say “Well that was a fun night. I’m going back to AF living.” Xo5 -
RubyRed427 wrote: »Yellowstone1983 wrote: »Hi everyone.. I ruined my 18 day streak.. I wasn't all that angry with myself at first, but it continues to grow as the day goes on. I don't want to feel this disappointment again.. It felt good to not have any guilt for the last 18 mornings.. I think the hardest thing for me right now is to not hang onto the bad feelings and just move on.. Hopefully when I wake up tomorrow, I'll be back to feeling ok about myself.. Congrats to everyone who continues to remain AF.. And to those who put themselves out there today after having alcohol, thanks for doing it. It made me feel more open to sharing.
You didn’t ruin anything. Hope you had fun and tomorrow you will say “Ok, now it’s day1”. And get back on track. You made such great strides during those 18 days, I’m sure you will be able to say “Well that was a fun night. I’m going back to AF living.” Xo
I'm definitely back on track.. It wasn't for fun so much as for emotionally detaching from a difficult financial situation, which of course didn't make anything better, I was just able to get away from it for a while.. Hopefully the shame I feel will be enough to keep me from giving in so easily.. And FYI to anyone with Federal student loans, or family members with them- income based repayment is an evil trap, don't ever do it!8 -
salleewins wrote: »@Yellowstone1983 Thanks for sharing! Keep going! Yes, you are disappointed, but if you stay stuck you may drink again! Quickly just start again!
Thank you for the support! I'm definitely continuing AF!4 -
Hi all. I’ve been away for months. Just checking in. I had a 50-day AF streak going and then had “one” drink on September 25. It took till MLK day to get to another Day 1. Hard lesson. So today’s day 7. Teaching in juvie detention has been wonderful and terrible and eye-opening. Tons of joy and tons of sadness. I won’t return next year. The job consumes my life. But I’m hoping the next 16 weeks will be an opportunity to be AF and healthy. Great to see y’all. No phones allowed at work so I can’t be a regular but will dip in for inspiration when I can. I really appreciate this thread.12
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