Best Marriage Advice
Replies
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Make a commitment: There are times I am going to screw up and there are times you are going to drive me nuts, but I love you and I am in this for the long haul. Compromise and bring her coffee for no reason.
One important thing I found: 28 years of marriage.... Find her love language. There are 5 and if you find out what her language (How she feels love) is and keep her love tank filled. For a few years, I would buy her gifts and she would just say "That's nice" and I found out she feels love by me, getting her car washed, emptying the dishwasher, taking her car for maintenance (Service) make sure every day she gets coffee.
Time spent
Service
Touch
Words of affirmation
Gifts
Find out your mates language and you got have got it made. Dr. Gary Chapman... 5 Love Languages.
This is very true. My ex wanted service and gifts lots and lots of expensive gifts :laugh: My current taught me about these love languages and she wants touch, words of affirmation, and time. Everyone is different.0 -
Don;t get married0
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Before you get into any kind of argument, ask yourself 3 questions:
1. Is it a matter of principle?
2. Will it change anything?
3.Can I live with it?
Only go ahead if the answers are yes, yes, and no.0 -
Continue to treat your partner as if you're still "dating".
Every once in a while my man brings me flowers, or chocolates. Every time I go shopping anywhere with cards, I look to see if there are any that remind me of him. I hide them in his car randomly. Sometimes we ditch the kids and go out to a movie. We hold hands.
I'll wear something sexy and seduce him---do something a little more exotic than the standard blow jobs and steak dinners he gets regularly for having the good sense to be with me.
These are the things that were lacking in my failed marriage. (besides that he doesn't beat me. That's advice too. Don't beat your spouse.)
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The other day I woke up in the morning, long after my partner had gone to work in the dark hours of the day. I put on a cup of coffee and went to weigh myself (as is my routine) and my scale wouldn't work. The digital display was glowing a bit, but it couldn't read it, so I flipped on the bathroom light to see what was going on
the display had been covered up by a piece of paper that read "PERFECT" (my profile picture now).
Those little things keep "the spark" alive.
Don't take your person for granted,
neither allow yourself to be taken for granted.
This one also0 -
** f**k him or feed him*** daily.....0
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"LIKING" each other is WAY more important than LOVING each other. PERIOD0
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Bump (will hopefully need in the near future
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Don't do it.0
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2. Don't have constant "headaches". Would it really kill ya to "take one for the team" now and again?
LMFAO!!
Seriously. I defy you to show me one woman who willingly "got busy" with her spouse even though she wasn't in the mood that afterward found herself thinking "now why did I do that", unless of course he's a dud in that department, in which case you have bigger issues than whether or not you're in the mood.0 -
Hot sex. Every.Single.Day.
Hurd dat^0 -
Continue to treat your partner as if you're still "dating".
Every once in a while my man brings me flowers, or chocolates. Every time I go shopping anywhere with cards, I look to see if there are any that remind me of him. I hide them in his car randomly. Sometimes we ditch the kids and go out to a movie. We hold hands.
I'll wear something sexy and seduce him---do something a little more exotic than the standard blow jobs and steak dinners he gets regularly for having the good sense to be with me.
These are the things that were lacking in my failed marriage. (besides that he doesn't beat me. That's advice too. Don't beat your spouse.)
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.
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The other day I woke up in the morning, long after my partner had gone to work in the dark hours of the day. I put on a cup of coffee and went to weigh myself (as is my routine) and my scale wouldn't work. The digital display was glowing a bit, but it couldn't read it, so I flipped on the bathroom light to see what was going on
the display had been covered up by a piece of paper that read "PERFECT" (my profile picture now).
Those little things keep "the spark" alive.
Don't take your person for granted,
neither allow yourself to be taken for granted.
THIS. LOVE this.0 -
Hot sex. Every.Single.Day.
And sometimes with each other!0 -
Never lie.0
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Don't stop doing the little things for each other.
Communicate. Even when it's difficult, you need to be honest, open, and support each other.
Don't be afraid to compromise and forgive each other for faults. I've always told my husband that the only things he could do to make me leave would be to cheat on me or start beating on me. Everything else we can work out.0 -
My personal advice.
Make sure he is not gay.0 -
stash money away0
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Never lie.
If we told you the truth you'd never marry us in the first place lol0 -
Mine may sound pessimistic, but don't expect a fairy tale.
I love my husband more than anything but sometimes life gets hard. Don't get pissed off that he left the toilet seat up and other little things that are only minor inconveniences.
Also, never go to bed angry. (Have crazy make up sex first duhhhh)0 -
Well, as a divorcee I'm a bit jaded on the subject. But if you're going to get married...
Have sex. Lots of it. Even if you aren't exactly in the mood, go for it.
Don't sleep in separate beds in the same house. No matter how angry you are with each other, as long as you're trying to work it out sleep next to each other, even if you don't touch.
Hug/kiss every single day.
Settle on who will do the dishes before you get married. I swear this was the ultimate cause of my divorce :laugh:
Oh and if you're going to cheat, either be up front about it from the beginning or don't deny it when you get caught0 -
Hot sex. Every.Single.Day.
This...
And, at all other times, always be polite with each other. 0 -
"LIKING" each other is WAY more important than LOVING each other. PERIOD
'Love' is more than how you feel at any moment. It's a verb, and it's what you do.0 -
If it was a problem before the marriage, it will be a problem after the marriage.0
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Tell them you love them. Daily. Multiple times a day even. Never let doubt creep into their mind. Always kiss them goodbye before you leave.0
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Man, some good stuff in here!0
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Oh...and the other important one:
Marry your best friend...You know, because sometimes the passion fizzles out, or God forbid something physically happens that prevents you from being able to be intimate...you want to live out the remainder of your (hopefully not sexless) days with someone you truly enjoy being with.0 -
Understand that when you get married, you have to work to make that marriage successful. It's easy to fall back and slack off, but you can't do that if you want to stay happily married.
Two of the most important parts of marriage are trust and intimacy.
I read somewhere that the happiest long time married couples (over 20 years) had sex 3-5 times a week. Aim for that and you have a very good chance to be successful.
Remember that there will be bumps in the road. How you deal with those bumps is the key to whether your marriage will make it through.
I've been with my husband for 23 years and we've had our ups and downs, but I can honestly say that we are more in love today than when we got married. We are each other's best friend and we say "I love you" several times a day and every time we end a phone call with each other. We make each other our priority. Every morning when I am making my breakfast to take to work, I fix his breakfast and set up the coffee pot so all he has to do is turn it on when he gets up. He makes me dinner every single night. Even if he doesn't happen to be hungry.0 -
Have an open marriage or hmm well no wait ...maybe that was have an open mind, never go to bed angry even if you have to stay up till 3 in the morning, hashing it out. Always say your sorry it isn't admitting your wrong, just that you are sorry for anything hurtful said, and always say I love you, you never know when it will be your last chance to say it to them, so if you really do, make sure they know.0
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Bump.
Most everything has been said. Great post!0 -
Treat your spouse like you don't deserve them so you're doing everything you can to keep them.
^^^My husband and I both treat each other this way.
Apparently, as near as I can tell from talking to my parents (who have been married 41 years) the key to a long marriage is to never talk to each other. I usually have to have the same conversation with each of them separately to get a whole story because they never seem to tell each other what is really going on. They are still very happily married after 41 years, and still hold hands in public.0 -
Understand that when you get married, you have to work to make that marriage successful. It's easy to fall back and slack off, but you can't do that if you want to stay happily married.
Two of the most important parts of marriage are trust and intimacy.
I read somewhere that the happiest long time married couples (over 20 years) had sex 3-5 times a week. Aim for that and you have a very good chance to be successful.
Remember that there will be bumps in the road. How you deal with those bumps is the key to whether your marriage will make it through.
I've been with my husband for 23 years and we've had our ups and downs, but I can honestly say that we are more in love today than when we got married. We are each other's best friend and we say "I love you" several times a day and every time we end a phone call with each other. We make each other our priority. Every morning when I am making my breakfast to take to work, I fix his breakfast and set up the coffee pot so all he has to do is turn it on when he gets up. He makes me dinner every single night. Even if he doesn't happen to be hungry.
:flowerforyou:
This is awesome!0
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