Your doctor says you're obese!

emmalzthompson

Not True! I was offended when my doctor told me i was obese. Mainly because I looked in the mirror and knew I was overweight, fat .... but not obese, it did upset me, more so as my doctor didnt tell me my bmi, and so I figured it out for myself, and I was only one notch into obesity ... so a fine line between over weight and obese, I think my doctor should of explained this all a bit better for me.

So you were obese, your doctor told you that you were obese but you got offended because even though the BMI scale said you were obese you wanted your doctor to call you overweight?

No I wanted my doctor to of said it differently like others have suggested .... and explain it to me more. I was not really aware of how a BMI chart worked, or the levels of Obesity. He litteraly just said you are obese, no explanation, no charts. No 'You fall into the Obese range, but it wont take you much work to get out of it' then went on to basically call me a liar on my food intake! I assumed someone obese would be around 17 plus stone! ! was no where near that, and so this is what offended me or more to the point annoyed me he didnt explain anything to me, and of course If i was under the impression OBESE to me was actually what a MORBIDLY OBESE person would look like then yes I am going to be upset.

Of course, from my point of view, the BMI charts are about as useful as teats on a bull. So many weaknesses, so many flaws. A "gross" instrument (rather than an exact instrument). Too many people place too much emphasis on the BMI number, just like they do the scale number. There isn't a competitive bodybuilder in the world who wouldn't be classified as obese, even at 4% bodyfat. Arnold Scharzeneggar was 6'4" and competed at about 260 pounds, which gives him a BMI of 31.6. Winning Mr. Universe and Mr. Olympia with a BMI that says he was obese. Really? BMI is a tool, a potentially useful tool But don't make it out to be an exact and perfect tool either.

Also my last weigh day I had lost no llbs but 1% body fat! This to me is great! But my bmi would not of changed despite toning my body more, and looking better for it

mcjmommy

I didn't/don't have a problem with a Doctor telling me I'm obese. I had a cardiologist that I barely knew make jokes about my weight that did offend me.
That was the last day I saw him and I don't need a cardiologist anymore

Sharon_C

The other day I went to the doctor and he looked me in the eye and told me I had very advanced arthritis for someone my age. I was not offended. Why would I be offended if he told me I was obese?

BozGirl

My doctor did not tell me I was obese, but he told me in a very firm voice that I HAD to make some lifestyle changes. I remember being surprised and mildly offended, but over the next couple weeks I kept repeating that conversation in my head, and even though it was difficult to hear, I knew he was correct.

Reflecting back, I know the firmness in his voice meant that he cared about my quality of life, and I know his choice of words ("lifestyle changes") was a nice way of saying that my health was poor.

It was blunt, yet kind. I heard the message.

StarChanger

The doctor that warned him remains mine and my kids' primary doc. It seems to me that in the world of managed care, our doc did alright having this non -compliant patient 'fire' him. His out of control diabetes, weight, blood pressure, and totally predictable poor outcomes aren't on his caseload and metrics any longer, but instead reflect the outcomes of the softer, "nicer" doctor who clearly didn't offend my ex. I imagine my doctor, like me, is quite happy to be well rid of him and see him be someone else's headache.

Yes! This is also one of the plethora of reasons that, while bedside manner is important (and can be controlled in the free-market...crappy docs run off their patients, go broke, and go home), the new system of "grading" doctors with patient "surveys" (which also have many factors surveyed that the doctor, often, can NOT control....like "how long did you have to wait".) is a BAD idea. All these surveys do is reward "popular" doctors, who are not necessarily the best doctors.

Many of the countries best and brightest people are completely, socially, inept / awkward (or just plain *kitten*....think Steve Jobs)...but if I'm sick or dying, by God, give me the REALLY smart guy. In addition, most surveys are filled out by women (who go to the doctor with more frequency than men) and who will often judge doctors on purely emotional levels (hot, young, male doc gets good marks....older, quiet, homely one does not.) It's like high school, all over....but in healthcare, with REAL consequences. Administrators take those things VERY seriously, because they mean Federal $$$ to the hospital....so if you aren't getting high marks, you may lose your job. Good old Dr. Jones, who has delivered 90% of the county, and has saved THOUSANDS of lives...but is grumpy in the middle of the night...gets canned, while young Dr. Feelsgood, who is only a doc because he's going to inherit his Dad's practice, gets all the accolades. Welcome to Obamacare.

Thewatcher_66

The only way to say it is to say it. If he sugar coats it, the patient may not feel a sense of urgency to make a lifestyle change. No different from telling a patient that he smokes too much or has high blood pressure.

jetscreaminagain

I think you misunderstood me. My doc is awesome. My ex 's problems are his own. He had good advice but rather than face the truth (his own responsibility for his own health) he ran the doctor down, fired him, didn't change a thing and nearly died.

I think it sucks to grade a doctor on whether their patients get off their a$$es and change things. I'm glad for my doctor that my lazy useless ex and his outcomes didn't become a mark against my doc. But I also think grading /paying for results rather than visits is a good thing. Maybe it will help an evolution toward responsibility for oneself and ones health.

Get your feelings hurt, blame the mean doctor, don't change a thing and get the predictable outcome. Or. Hear the truth. Let the discomfort fuel real change and get your second chance. Choice is yours. It isn't about the doctor. It is about YOU. It always ever is about you.

The doctor that warned him remains mine and my kids' primary doc. It seems to me that in the world of managed care, our doc did alright having this non -compliant patient 'fire' him. His out of control diabetes, weight, blood pressure, and totally predictable poor outcomes aren't on his caseload and metrics any longer, but instead reflect the outcomes of the softer, "nicer" doctor who clearly didn't offend my ex. I imagine my doctor, like me, is quite happy to be well rid of him and see him be someone else's headache.

Yes! This is also one of the plethora of reasons that, while bedside manner is important (and can be controlled in the free-market...crappy docs run off their patients, go broke, and go home), the new system of "grading" doctors with patient "surveys" (which also have many factors surveyed that the doctor, often, can NOT control....like "how long did you have to wait".) is a BAD idea. All these surveys do is reward "popular" doctors, who are not necessarily the best doctors.

Many of the countries best and brightest people are completely, socially, inept / awkward (or just plain *kitten*....think Steve Jobs)...but if I'm sick or dying, by God, give me the REALLY smart guy. In addition, most surveys are filled out by women (who go to the doctor with more frequency than men) and who will often judge doctors on purely emotional levels (hot, young, male doc gets good marks....older, quiet, homely one does not.) It's like high school, all over....but in healthcare, with REAL consequences. Administrators take those things VERY seriously, because they mean Federal $$$ to the hospital....so if you aren't getting high marks, you may lose your job. Good old Dr. Jones, who has delivered 90% of the county, and has saved THOUSANDS of lives...but is grumpy in the middle of the night...gets canned, while young Dr. Feelsgood, who is only a doc because he's going to inherit his Dad's practice, gets all the accolades. Welcome to Obamacare.

1802go

I agree with you 100%

ldrosophila

I remember reading my medical record when I was in my early 20's and being devastated to see the term obese. It wasnt until later in school and working that I learned it's just the clinical term for fat, and I am fat.

I avoid putting it into patient's charts, but sometimes you have to say it to be clear and concise.

It's hard to accept that you are obese, it's a harsh sounding word, but it is the truth.

PS obesity is generally defined by medical personnel as a BMI >30

ldrosophila

Oh and as far as softening the blow I tell them that now this is simply a clinical term based on defined standards. It has no basis in your health, and often times doctors have to use the for insurance coverage purposes.

I usually like to throw it on the insurance companies because it softens the blow. I'll then explain how this is determined and hopefully they understand a bit more and the pain has been some what alleviated.

megalin9

I don't have a problem with a doctor using that terminology. I have a problem with a doctor using that as the culprit for all other health issues.

Patient: Hey, Doc. My shoulder has really been bothering me.
Doc: That's because you are obese.

Patient: Hey, Doc. My allergies are out of control.
Doc: That's because you are obese.

^^^This is the only thing I find offensive. Fortunately, I've only HEARD of people with experiences like these and haven't actually experienced it myself.

brevislux

Seriously, I'm not bothered. I've never been obese, but I don't care what it is they say to me so long as it's true - they're just doing their job. Even if it's an embarrassing thing for me to bring up to anyone, why should you care about it when it's a doctor? They see dozens of patients a day and they're not specifically interested in you more than anyone else. I'm sure there are scumbags but they have no interest in saying stuff just to insult us, it's a health issue.

Hexahedra

Doctors are not necessarily the most suave people out there, otherwise they would become salesmen. Whether he says "you are obese" or "you are in the obese range" the fact remains that you're obese. Just appreciate him for recognizing the problem and advising you to work on it.

jetscreaminagain

Oh and as far as softening the blow I tell them that now this is simply a clinical term based on defined standards. It has no basis in your health, and often times doctors have to use the for insurance coverage purposes.

I usually like to throw it on the insurance companies because it softens the blow. I'll then explain how this is determined and hopefully they understand a bit more and the pain has been some what alleviated.

"It has no basis in your health "?!?! Are you kidding?

Obesity has devastating impacts on health and you do a huge disservice to your patients and the doctors you work for to give any other message than that. People don't change until they are too uncomfortable and unhappy with the status quot. Alleviating their discomfort by misleading them about the health impacts of their obesity so you don't have to face their difficult emotions is a terrible thing to do! And probably delays or prevents them making changes and saving their own health!
:noway:

wannabpiper

Rather than saying to a patient that (s)he is obese, a good medical professional should address it as an "unhealthy weight" and explain how it is impacting the patient's health. I believe that it should always be addressed at least once. Since it is a health issue, a practitioner would be remiss if she did not address it with her patients. Harping is another issue; it's unnecessary if the patient is not interested/willing to make the necessary changes. If the patient is interested in changing her lifestyle to accommodate weight loss, then the practitioner should refer the patient in the right direction.

Skeebee

Honesty is the best policy...and I would be worried if a doctor was sugar coating anything. Don't see why this is an issue with some people!!

Chelz2013

I've had many different Doctors due to job changes, insurance changes, moving, health issues, etc. and I'm actually surprised that not every single one of them told me I was overweight or obese or anything. No discussion whatsoever.

Now, granted, I know I'm overweight. I've been overweight my whole life.

I had ONE Doctor tell me and when I ASKED for HELP they didn't offer one bit of helpful advice, didn't refer me to a dietician or anything. That was me reaching out for help and they didn't do squat. That's disturbing.

It's taken me a long time to do something for myself. I am more committed now to changing my lifestyle and health for the better and the permanent than I've ever been. That's empowering!