JUST FOR TODAY -- One Day at a Time .... Daily commitment thread for 2019

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  • clicketykeys
    clicketykeys Posts: 6,568 Member
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    Checking in from Wednesday
    1. AM run - aim for 3.5 miles, <50 min. Therapy exercises: lunges, push-ups, ankle lifts, plank. Feed cats. Meds. Tea! Update JFT by 7:00.
    2. Before school: Update class websites. Update first directions. Pull Machiavelli copies.
    3. Class 1-2: Grammar practice. Definitions. Assign chapters. Paraphrase and simplify. Choose leaders.
    4. Planning: A - Update lesson plans and print. CALL PARENTS. B - Finish research essays at lunch. Duo. C - Enter all grades. D - Draft essay.
    5. Class 4: Split; work on DOE practice.
    6. Drink more water. No, more. Keep the pitcher in the fridge full. You're not actually hungry. Make some tea. Drink more water!
    7. Audition for summer job. Log Thursday food. Prep Thursday lunch. Chop celery.
    8. Gratitude journal. Walk? Prep Wes Moore plans. Read 10 pages each of Cafeteria and OTCU.
    9. Therapy exercises: lunges, push-ups, ankle lifts, plank. Lang8 post. Read 6 pages of Capital. Read 10 pages of Fallout. Meds. Floss, rinse, brush teeth. In bed by 8:45; devices off by 9:00; alarm set for 5:00. Update Goodreads Friday.

    JFT Thursday
    1. AM walk: 2 miles. Therapy exercises: lunges, push-ups, ankle lifts. Feed cats. Meds. Tea! Update JFT by 7:00.
    2. Before school: Update class websites. Update first directions.
    3. Class 1-2: Draft email TOGETHER. Check to make sure that each student has questions to choose from. Select important quote from paraphrased chapters. Research leaders.
    4. Planning: A - Update lesson plans and print. CALL PARENTS. B - Read & respond to student writing at lunch. Duo. C - Enter all grades. D - Draft essay.
    5. Class 4: Exam prep.
    6. Drink more water. No, more. Keep the pitcher in the fridge full. You're not actually hungry. Make some tea. Drink more water!
    7. BodyPump 5:30. Update grocery list. Reply to emails.
    8. Draft essay. Blog post. Read 6 pages Cafeteria and 10 On the Come Up. Lang8 post?
    9. Therapy exercises: lunges, push-ups, ankle lifts. Balance practice. Prep Fri lunch. Chop celery. Meds. Floss, rinse, brush teeth. In bed by 8:45; devices off by 9:00; alarm set for 5:50. Update Goodreads Friday. Check weather to plan run. Take cord for phone to school. Take headphones.

    Scale goals
    End of 2017: 174.6
    End of 2018: 189.2
    January 2019: 186.0
    February 2019: 187.0
    Today: 189.4

    Ongoing plans/ideas behind the cut
    1. Purchases: Go to Mac store and see if they can retrieve the files off the iMac. Look for an "ugly Christmas sweater" and a long-haired doll at thrift stores. Practice French braiding. Go to used bookstore and look for Design for How People Learn (Julie Dirksen), On Writing (Stephen King), Dying for a Paycheck (Robin Hardman), The Prince (tr. Tim Parks, Russell Price, or Robert Adams), The Secret Adversary (Christie). Add lamp and wobble board to grocery list.
    2. E2: What should the controlling ideas be in a study of world literature? Review world lit options. Create vocabulary lists for each unit that come from the texts used: Animal Farm, Julius Caesar, Wes Moore, I Am Malala. Find a way to incorporate changing words from one part of speech to another. Students need to know how to review multiple sources and synthesize information in order to draw a conclusion. Need practice with the difference between transitions and overlapping (at end of paragraph - "another issue is Y" vs "there are other issues besides X"). Quit using "in conclusion" and "I believe" and other writing-about-my-writing phrases. Confusion between direct/indirect objects and prepositional phrases. Use the UDHR and the Declaration of Independence to study paraphrasing; use that to front-load Machiavelli and how to deal with challenging texts. Confusion between everyday / every day and similar constructions.
    3. E1: Need practice with quoting & paraphrasing sources, identifying claims that would need support, use of last names for reference, and capitalization practice (common/proper nouns, titles). Difficulty using possessive nouns in their own writing. Honors: practice subject/object pronouns (my friend and I / my friend and me). Poetry: Revise "Songs are Poetry" handouts.
    4. Curriculum Development: Writing mini-unit. Review scholarly research on 5PE. (I think I can have this as an intro to the research unit so that they also get exposure to how quotes are integrated and cited.) Parallel structure; use of emotional language, specific detail. Use "Write About a Pebble" lesson from Atwell. How long should each unit take? Do research on characteristics: curiosity, persistence, resilience, creativity, responsibility, optimism, courage, integrity, authenticity, leadership, self-awareness, humility, compassion - others? Include grammarly check on essays! Review assessments. What is the purpose for each unit? What should the controlling ideas be in a study of world literature? Review world lit options.
    5. Professional Development: Write blog post weekly. Comment on 3 posts each week -Tu Th Sun? Check with PSC. Talk with Z about articles and/or conference proposals.
    6. Medical: Apr 25 Dentist. Apr 22 McC. Call to set up checkups with Dass (October). GET MAGAZINES FOR COLLAGES FROM DOCTORS.
    7. Theater: Audition for Mamma Mia ??? Need sub for May 2, opening day.
    8. House: Mineral oil on tile spots. Check with D about ceiling.
    9. Fun: Open beading on Thursdays. May 4 is SW Day and FCB Day. Coloring at library on Tuesday.

    WFTY: Climbing. Well, I didn't run this morning, so my weight isn't as low, hahaha!
    Positive thought: We're short on teachers, so they're not likely to fire me. I hope that ALSO means they won't give me a crappy evaluation.
  • aubyshortcake
    aubyshortcake Posts: 796 Member
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    Good morning all! Thank you so much for your support, I am SO relieved to have the dogs back home with us.

    With everything going on this is the first week I've skipped a workout since I started. I knew it would happen eventually, as life happens, but I'm really trying not to beat myself up over it. In the past this is something that would derail me and I refuse to let it!

    Positive thought for today: my boss proved to be really understanding and kind yesterday, he even said I could bring both dogs to work if needed to keep an eye on them while they recovered.

    @Snowflake1968 that is great news, I really hope this is the one!

    @HEGoddard0928 I am so sorry you are both having to go through this, I hope this will all be resolved soon for you.

    Yesterday 4/17:

    1. Give Rukia her a.m. pills 😁
    2. Stay within calorie goal😁
    3. Go for a walk at lunch😁
    4. Finish work at 5:15😞
    5. Give Rukia her p.m. pill😁
    6. Pick up rolls for dinner😁
    7. Work out after work😞
    8. Cook dinner😁

    JFT 4/18:

    1. Give Rukia her a.m. pills 😁
    2. Stay within calorie goal
    3. Go for a walk at lunch
    4. Finish work at 5:15
    5. Give Rukia her p.m. pill
    6. Work out after work
  • GarysGirl81
    GarysGirl81 Posts: 34 Member
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    Completed everything but my cardio yesterday. Squat challenge is going great and I’m about to embark on a kettlebell swing challenge, but I feel I need to build up to that so JFT:
    1. Stick to eating plan.
    2. Drink 40 oz of water.
    3. Complete squats.
    4. Start prepping for kettlebell challenge.
    5. Get some of my Easter shopping done.
  • daneejela
    daneejela Posts: 461 Member
    edited April 2019
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    daneejela wrote: »
    It's already 3PM here, so, only half of a day is in front of me, but here are my goals:

    - eat berries for an afternoon snack :)
    - eat light, folate-rich dinner (chickpeas and some greens) :)
    - don't eat anything after dinner :)
    - take a walk
    - make at least one more contact list (for the job) :)


    JFT:
    - eat berries for an afternoon snack
    - eat light, folate-rich dinner (salmon and swiss chard)
    - take a walk
    - make at least one more contact list (grr, can't wait to be done with this task)
    - dance for a few minutes

    I want to work my diet and daily habits up to:
    - less animal protein, more plant protein
    - minimize dairy to 1 cup of white coffee and a cup of kefir in the morning
    - increase folate-rich foods (chickpeas, lentils, leafy greens) to at least one meal a day
    - daily walks
    - bodyweight exercises
  • daneejela
    daneejela Posts: 461 Member
    Options
    @Bex953172
    You are completely right! It happens to me sometimes, I make a stupid thing, then out of shame, I procrastinate fixing it...But I have finally made the tests and soon I should get results.
    Thanks for the warning regarding the pregnancy!

    I am so sorry that you have experienced those struggles so early...it's really a challenge to deal with chronic diseases in such a young age. I've been diagnosed with PCOS at the same age (15). But, medicine is progressing, so I hope that soon they'll know more about mechanisms that cause those imbalances in the body.


    @ Snowflake1968
    Such great news! I admire how you deal with the situation and from the experience, I know that this kind of great attitude always yields something good.
    Don't be scared of the unknown, everything seems hard at the beginning, but soon it starts to fall into place.

    @littleblackskirt
    Doing awesome with all those yeses :)
  • johicks
    johicks Posts: 1,991 Member
    Options
    JFT ~Thursday (4/18)
    Morning Affirmations √
    Pre-log for this week's event meals
    Sat. Memorial- plan for meals.
    Check~in w/MFP pals √
    Track
    9:45am Breakfast & Pack/Plate meals &Snks √
    10:00am Shower
    10:40am Leave
    Park & walk
    Work
    12:30pm Snack - NoBakeFake
    3:30pm Snack - Spinach/ Egg "Salad
    5:30pm Dinner
    8:00pm- Popcorn & diet Root beer

    KEEP Nightly routine of not binging:
    Read & complete notes to self
    Eat mindfully pre-plated dinner; or log prior if plans change.
    Drink hot tea
    Brush teeth. Go to bed & Say “Kitchen Closed!”
    Post on MFP just before lights out (or next morning).


    Jan~ Drink 8+ water
    Feb.~ Only 1 snack after dinner
    Mar.~ 15m walk outside- cool & brisk √
    April challenge. Say something positive:
  • Elbee1
    Elbee1 Posts: 2,024 Member
    Options
    ]4/17/19 wed.
    Weight: 150.6 lbs
    Stay in Green 😞 this is first day in about a month and a half that I lost control. Still wasn't as bad as I was before really becoming serious about dieting in first week of March. I even logged all the food. I do so much better with planned meals. The next week & a half are going to be rough. Like someone else mentioned: self-sabotage! Why did I do that! It just doesn't even make sense. I was doing so well!
    Drink at least 4 8oz. glasses of water :)
    Positive thought: stay mindful of what I'm doing! I won't let one "fail" in over 45 days set me back. This time I am jumping back in with both feet, immediately! I "can do" it! I've got that "can do" attitude!!!! We all can!!!

    JFT 4/18/19
    Weigh:
    Stay in Green
    Drink at least 4 8oz. glasses of water

    @aubyshortcake so happy your dogs are ok & you have them back. Such a great story. There could be a movie made about them! So happy that they were rescued!

    Sending virtual hugs to everyone.
    (BTW, I do click on the bottom of practically every post that I read. Usually with the like, hug, insightful or inspiring...)

    Thanks for having this thread.
    Linda (Elbee1)



  • korina75
    korina75 Posts: 297 Member
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    Yesterday was my first day off in quite some time and I didn't even get out of pajamas till noon! It was pretty nice. Today it's back to work but that's ok, I feel refreshed. I had gained weight after a four day stretch of going over by only a few hundred calories I got myself back on track yesterday and lost a little bit. That felt good! Gives me motivation to stay on track.

    JFT 4/17:
    Start journaling-around meals and start a joyful movement list. :)
    Mindfully eat all meals/snacks :)
    60 minutes exercise :)
    Some type of joyful movement (hiking, yoga, walking etc) :)
    Catch up on Laundry/Cleaning :(
    10 minutes meditation :(


    JFT 4/18
    30 minutes HIIT workout
    Mindfully eat lunch/dinner/snacks (already wolfed breakfast)
    5 minutes meditation
    Stay within calorie goals
    30 minutes joyful movement
    QT with kiddo-possible walk/hike
    Buy Easter basket stuff
  • Elbee1
    Elbee1 Posts: 2,024 Member
    edited April 2019
    Options
    littleblackskirt wrote: »
    JFT 26th April

    Log everything I did, until late evening
    Stay in the green No, was only just over, then ate half a big bag of crisps before bed. Why???
    Back exercises just some stretches
    Find house insurance Yes
    Babysit Yes
    Walk 45 minutes, with no dawdling. Pleased I managed that

    Sometimes I "forget" how important this is to me. Just how much I want to lose some weight for my health, my pain, my looks. I counted every calorie yesterday, and then in the evening I snacked and ruined the days efforts. Tried to talk myself out of it, but still did it. Someone here recently mentioned "intentional sabotage", why do we do it?!

    Last night, I did same thing. Self-sabotage. However; unlike the last 7+ years, I am so determined this time that I am immediately getting back to it. I'm not sure why I continually self-sabotaged over the years or why we do this. I probably should have gone to a counselor/psychologist/psychiatrist. In the past, I also don't know why I also would just have the attitude of, "well, I already blew it, yes, I'll have that piece of cake your offering me & then just continual downwards spiral from there. Even on a daily basis. Even with seeing & knowing what I was doing to myself. I couldn't make it thru one week. That's why I was so happy to find this thread the end of last December. And it still has taken bad blood work the last week in February to get me serious & staying serious, now. So that tells me something. Not sure exactly what tho. I am very serious now to hopefully avoid being put on cholesterol meds & diabetes meds. Blood work was no longer good or borderline. My blood sugar was high as was the bad cholesterol. (Interestingly, stress was continued during this time of having stayed the course, but being physically tired wasn't really a factor. )

    I will say what I did notice about myself, yesterday that I think had to do with my self-sabotage. I was physically tired, stressed, and didn't have my food planned. And, since before that first week of March, I had been that way daily. However; the extra motivation of avoiding having to be on meds after knowing it may even be too late now to avoid--I had the desperation thinking that this is my very last chance! So that got me through until last night. I also made a mental choice that I've done great all this time, one bun with my burger patty won't hurt me tonight--well, it did. It was yummy & then I wanted to have another tasty treat so added peanut butter on crackers with Hershey's syrup. Again, one night won't hurt me thinking. Ghah!

    So I'm thinking that it's not necessarily intentionally self-sabotage but it seems like it because we know it while we're doing it.... Almost like we're punishing ourselves for being weak & yet because we're in a weakened state, for me physically & mentally, were not able to overcome the weakness even tho we know better.

    I'm finding it takes an almost Herculean strength to overcome whatever weakness.

    Because I used to be an athlete, the past month and a half have been successful for me, because I've had to really dig down deep inside me & pull out the strength & focus due to extreme motivation. I also used my tools which are teamwork (you all on this thread are my team) and visualization. Visualizing myself standing on the scale with lower numbers, visualizing myself running & exercising like I used to do with energy, strength & flexibility, visualizing myself as I used to be in some of my old clothes--the ones still hanging in my closet. Must keep the "can do" attitude at all times.

    So rather than give up (true athletes never do that!)... I'm suggesting these things for myself & anyone else who needs help with the binging/self-sabotage thing.
    Teamwork, visualization, can do attitude of reaching down deep inside ourselves & pull out the strength to focus & concentrate. This is the time! Not tomorrow. We can do it!

    @littleblackskirt -- by the way, it looks to me that you did a lot "right" yesterday! Fantastic on back stretches, babysitting, finding insurance, and walking without dawdling. You are helping me with motivation! Thank you!
  • AJB1014
    AJB1014 Posts: 1,380 Member
    Options
    JFT Weds
    1. Smoothie :)
    2. Fish Oil :)
    3. Log all food :)
    4. Waters! Atleast 6 waters while at work :)
    5. Cook dinner at home - sausage, pepper and onion sandwiches w/tater tots salad :)
    6. Eat packed lunch :)
    7. Make waxing appointment for lunch :)
    8. Run dishwasher :)
    9. PUT AWAY CLOTHES!!! :)
    10. Bed by 9:30 :)
    11. Update this list later :)
    12. Pick out clothes :)
    13. make coffee :)
    14. Shower :)

    JFT Thurs
    1. Smoothie :)
    2. Fish oil :)
    3. Up by 555 >:) 615
    4. Bring trash >:) forgot!
    5. Pack lunch :)
    6. Text Mom :)
    7. Wear makeup >:) not sure why I made this a goal?
    8. Log all food
    9. 4 waters job 1 - 2 waters job 2
    10. Eat packed lunch
    11. Cook dinner at home - chicken and roast potatoes
    12. Be positive and kind
    13. Bed by 9:30
    14. Update this list later
  • AJB1014
    AJB1014 Posts: 1,380 Member
    Options
    @aubyshortcake So glad your doggies are safe and home again!

    @maryrobinson40 I'm sorry for my delay but please know you have been in my thoughts - condolences to you and your family.

    @snowflake1968 Yaaaaaay on the job prospect!!!

    @johicks Gum helped me quit smoking and you've just reminded me what a lifesaver it can be when I want to mindlessly snack due to oral fixation not hunger!

    @HEGoddard0928 Ugh! I'm so sorry Matt is still struggling. Thinking of you both and sending positive healing thoughts!

    @daneejela I have PCOS also and started this journey to be better prepared for trying to conceive too!
  • asclepsia
    asclepsia Posts: 204 Member
    Options
    Taking a page from cschmitz and others to keep track of the weight loss (or gain);
    Height: 5'8"--age 75
    January 1, 2018: 168
    February 1, 2018: 166
    March 1, 2018: 166
    March 15, 2018: 165.5
    Big gap here--not recording my weight onMFP.
    March 1, 2019: 163.6
    March 30, 2019: 163.4
    April 15, 2019: 162.4
    Well, it took six weeks, but I did lose a pound, and have kept it off this week. Lowering my overall calorie goal to 1600 from 1800, and adding elevation to my daily walk, must have done the trick. Grateful for suggestions from
    everyone.
    b]Goals:[/b]
    Exercise-20"
    Stay in the green
    Transplant tomatoes
    Clean fridge; buy groceries
    Decide on Easter baking
    Practice one hour
    Finish correspondence
    Tackle clutter!
  • littleblackskirt
    littleblackskirt Posts: 956 Member
    Options
    Elbee1 wrote: »

    So rather than give up (true athletes never do that!)... I'm suggesting these things for myself & anyone else who needs help with the binging/self-sabotage thing.
    Teamwork, visualization, can do attitude of reaching down deep inside ourselves & pull out the strength to focus & concentrate. This is the time! Not tomorrow. We can do it!

    @littleblackskirt -- by the way, it looks to me that you did a lot "right" yesterday! Fantastic on back stretches, babysitting, finding insurance, and walking without dawdling. You are helping me with motivation! Thank you!

    @Elbee1 , thank you. Since retiring from my main job last year I feel like I don't have much to put on my daily list (especially compared to some of the very hard working people on here!) I'm enjoying having more time in the house and to help out family, but it doesn't look a lot written down :)

    I also try to visualize, right now I'm convincing myself that I WILL be able to improve my back.

    @AJB1014 , LOTS of smiley faces there :)

  • AJB1014
    AJB1014 Posts: 1,380 Member
    Options
    azulvioleta6 wrote: »
    azulvioleta6 wrote: »
    [

    Wednesday:
    1. weigh in :)
    2. 10,000 steps :smile:
    3. walk on at least one work break :)
    4. gardening if weather permits, gym if it does not :( ended up cleaning house instead
    5. no social eating at work :)
    6. drink 8+ C liquids :) 10
    7. work on medium-term fitness goal setting :(
    8. get to sleep early :neutral:

    Thursday:
    1. weigh in
    2. 10,000 steps
    3. walk on at least one work break
    4. heavy gardening
    5. no social eating at work
    6. drink 8+ C liquids
    7. work on medium-term fitness goal setting
    8. get to sleep early

    Am I hearing people complaining about taking ONE tiny pill? I take a handful every morning, 4 at night and have to give myself injections at 9PM every day in order to stay alive. The injection vials have to be shipped in from across the country and cannot be purchased locally. They have to stay refrigerated at all times or they go bad--and cost more than $1000 to replace. All of this makes travel really difficult. I need both thyroid and pituitary hormones that my body does not make. I feel extraordinarily lucky that my adrenals are still working--many people with my disease also have to replace adrenal hormones, which means cortisone and all kinds of steroids every day or you end up in the hospital. I have five different metabolic diseases, and the hypopituitarism and Hashimoto's are by far the easiest to deal with.

    If your cross to bear is taking one minuscule pill a day, you might want to get some perspective.

    Whoa! Although I am very sorry to hear of your struggles, and a little perspective is sometimes helpful - please don't invalidate other peoples feelings based on your experience alone. We don't know what other struggles they may face. And even at that, if taking one pill a day is a struggle for them, its a struggle for them despite your situation. You certainly have a lot to deal with and I wish you the best in your treatments.
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,741 Member
    Options
    JFT - Wednesday April 17 - DETERMINED
    2L of water - 🙂
    Calories in green - 😒 but only on red by 112
    Walk 1 Mile - 🙂 I’m saying yes but it wasn’t purposeful
    Plank Challenge- 👿
    5 Fruits and Veggies - 1/5
    Only 1 evening Snack - 🙂
    5 something at bathroom break. -🙂
    Write in Journal - 🙂
    Do not disappoint myself, be conscious of my choices. - 🙂

    JFT - Thursday April 18 - DETERMINED
    2L of water
    Calories in green
    Walk 1 Mile
    Plank Challenge
    5 Fruits and Veggies
    Only 1 evening Snack
    5 something at bathroom break
    Write in Journal
    Do not disappoint myself, be conscious of my choices

    I had such a great day yesterday and at 930 last night I received an email from Sarah with a dozen links to start with.

    Today I am meeting the other career counsellor and am excited to tell him about this.

    I have a load of towels in the washer, I will dry them at the laundromat when I go to meet the counsellor.

    I still haven’t received a response from the other company that wanted to interview me, but I’m. It letting it upset me. He could have taken today off to enjoy an extra long weekend.

  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,073 Member
    Options
    AJB1014 wrote: »
    azulvioleta6 wrote: »
    azulvioleta6 wrote: »
    [

    Wednesday:
    1. weigh in :)
    2. 10,000 steps :smile:
    3. walk on at least one work break :)
    4. gardening if weather permits, gym if it does not :( ended up cleaning house instead
    5. no social eating at work :)
    6. drink 8+ C liquids :) 10
    7. work on medium-term fitness goal setting :(
    8. get to sleep early :neutral:

    Thursday:
    1. weigh in
    2. 10,000 steps
    3. walk on at least one work break
    4. heavy gardening
    5. no social eating at work
    6. drink 8+ C liquids
    7. work on medium-term fitness goal setting
    8. get to sleep early

    Am I hearing people complaining about taking ONE tiny pill? I take a handful every morning, 4 at night and have to give myself injections at 9PM every day in order to stay alive. The injection vials have to be shipped in from across the country and cannot be purchased locally. They have to stay refrigerated at all times or they go bad--and cost more than $1000 to replace. All of this makes travel really difficult. I need both thyroid and pituitary hormones that my body does not make. I feel extraordinarily lucky that my adrenals are still working--many people with my disease also have to replace adrenal hormones, which means cortisone and all kinds of steroids every day or you end up in the hospital. I have five different metabolic diseases, and the hypopituitarism and Hashimoto's are by far the easiest to deal with.

    If your cross to bear is taking one minuscule pill a day, you might want to get some perspective.

    Whoa! Although I am very sorry to hear of your struggles, and a little perspective is sometimes helpful - please don't invalidate other peoples feelings based on your experience alone. We don't know what other struggles they may face. And even at that, if taking one pill a day is a struggle for them, its a struggle for them despite your situation. You certainly have a lot to deal with and I wish you the best in your treatments.

    I do have to agree with AJB, it is not a competition on whose life is worse?
    Its kind of insulting that because youre " sicker" that makes our problems irrelevant.

    I am sorry you have all that to deal with, i got given a 10 day course of injections, one a day. Long story short, my partner passed out doing it and i couldnt physically do it to myself so i had to go without, i feel for you there, i really do, but just because its "not as bad as you" doesnt not make it less real for us.
  • pridesabtch
    pridesabtch Posts: 2,327 Member
    Options
    Elbee1 wrote: »

    Last night, I did same thing. Self-sabotage. However; unlike the last 7+ years, I am so determined this time that I am immediately getting back to it. I'm not sure why I continually self-sabotaged over the years or why we do this. I probably should have gone to a counselor/psychologist/psychiatrist. In the past, I also don't know why I also would just have the attitude of, "well, I already blew it, yes, I'll have that piece of cake your offering me & then just continual downwards spiral from there. Even on a daily basis. Even with seeing & knowing what I was doing to myself. I couldn't make it thru one week. That's why I was so happy to find this thread the end of last December. And it still has taken bad blood work the last week in February to get me serious & staying serious, now. So that tells me something. Not sure exactly what tho. I am very serious now to hopefully avoid being put on cholesterol meds & diabetes meds. Blood work was no longer good or borderline. My blood sugar was high as was the bad cholesterol. (Interestingly, stress was continued during this time of having stayed the course, but being physically tired wasn't really a factor. )

    I will say what I did notice about myself, yesterday that I think had to do with my self-sabotage. I was physically tired, stressed, and didn't have my food planned. And, since before that first week of March, I had been that way daily. However; the extra motivation of avoiding having to be on meds after knowing it may even be too late now to avoid--I had the desperation thinking that this is my very last chance! So that got me through until last night. I also made a mental choice that I've done great all this time, one bun with my burger patty won't hurt me tonight--well, it did. It was yummy & then I wanted to have another tasty treat so added peanut butter on crackers with Hershey's syrup. Again, one night won't hurt me thinking. Ghah!

    So I'm thinking that it's not necessarily intentionally self-sabotage but it seems like it because we know it while we're doing it.... Almost like we're punishing ourselves for being weak & yet because we're in a weakened state, for me physically & mentally, were not able to overcome the weakness even tho we know better.

    I'm finding it takes an almost Herculean strength to overcome whatever weakness.

    Because I used to be an athlete, the past month and a half have been successful for me, because I've had to really dig down deep inside me & pull out the strength & focus due to extreme motivation. I also used my tools which are teamwork (you all on this thread are my team) and visualization. Visualizing myself standing on the scale with lower numbers, visualizing myself running & exercising like I used to do with energy, strength & flexibility, visualizing myself as I used to be in some of my old clothes--the ones still hanging in my closet. Must keep the "can do" attitude at all times.

    So rather than give up (true athletes never do that!)... I'm suggesting these things for myself & anyone else who needs help with the binging/self-sabotage thing.
    Teamwork, visualization, can do attitude of reaching down deep inside ourselves & pull out the strength to focus & concentrate. This is the time! Not tomorrow. We can do it!

    @littleblackskirt -- by the way, it looks to me that you did a lot "right" yesterday! Fantastic on back stretches, babysitting, finding insurance, and walking without dawdling. You are helping me with motivation! Thank you!

    Thanks, I needed to hear this. I spiraled and am not sure I can get back to where I want to be. This helped.

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