Welcome to Debate Club! Please be aware that this is a space for respectful debate, and that your ideas will be challenged here. Please remember to critique the argument, not the author.

Adoption - Should Fat People Be Allowed to Adopt?

124

Replies

  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,237 Member
    edited February 2019
    It seems some of the arguments being presented assume that there’s a line of rejected just barely obese people clamoring to adopt children who have or are currently facing years in the foster system.

    As @kimny72 mentioned, this question was posed in response to a morbidly obese (the “extreme obesity” section of the chart a few posts up-the level of obesity where WLS is encouraged because the risks of remaining that obese exceed the risks of surgery) woman, trying to adopt a baby.

    While I don’t have any evidence or statistics to support one way or another, based on some posts up thread it seems the demand for adoptable babies far exceeds supply (and agencies can set whatever guidelines they choose as exclusionary as due to demand, they have the luxury of choosing whoever they deem to be the best possible parents) and supply of adoptable children older than babies vastly exceeds demand (and some requirements seem waived to allow these adoptions to take place-at least sometimes).

    I could be very wrong. I have no proof of anything.
  • aokoye
    aokoye Posts: 3,495 Member
    edited February 2019
    jgnatca wrote: »
    There’s a glut of couples wanting a baby for adoption.

    There’s a glut of children in the foster care system who would love a chance in a loving adoptive home.

    My first thought was that an obese parent would have a tough time chasing after a toddler. Or taking them to the park.

    So for baby adoption I figure the screeners can make the criteria as tough as they want.

    For older children, be generous. Loving parents can work around their disabilities and/or health issues.

    I advised my mentally ill son that I want a clean, pampered, doted-on grandchild like I have already. If he can provide all that, then all power to him. Painfully, gradually, he set aside the dream to father his own child. For the sake of his wife and the dream of a child who could have been. Now that’s love. That’s sacrifice.

    Though even then, there are plenty of people with mental illnesses who are responsible parents. I know multiple people who fall into that box, including some who have adopted their children.

    Of course there are also people with mental illnesses who one could easily predict would be a bad parent and others who flat out are poor parents in part because of their mental health issues. Your son is apparently one of those people (note - I am not trying to invalidate your son's decision). At the end of the day that's part of why this isn't black and white.

    edit: and by "responsible parents", I mean what you would expect from a parent good. Not just a "well they're keeping the kid alive..." sort of situation.
  • HeliumIsNoble
    HeliumIsNoble Posts: 1,213 Member
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

  • HeliumIsNoble
    HeliumIsNoble Posts: 1,213 Member
    edited February 2019
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg
    So would I, because at 5'2, weighing 110lbs, we'd have a BMI of 20.1, which is very low. The problem isn't BMI, the problem is this chart is broken.

    Speaking for myself only, I have a medium frame so that low in the range wouldn't work for me. The 18.5-20 zone is there for people who have petite frames.

  • jseams1234
    jseams1234 Posts: 1,219 Member
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg
  • HeliumIsNoble
    HeliumIsNoble Posts: 1,213 Member
    edited February 2019
    jseams1234 wrote: »
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg

    Typo. That should be 4 foot 10.

    P.S. the 18.5-25 range for women 4 foot 11 tall is 94 to 123 lbs. As you can see, that piece of nonsense says they should all ideally weigh 95lbs. Gah.
  • magnusthenerd
    magnusthenerd Posts: 1,207 Member
    jseams1234 wrote: »
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg

    Typo. That should be 4 foot 10.

    P.S. the 18.5-25 range for women 4 foot 11 tall is 94 to 123 lbs. As you can see, that piece of nonsense says they should all ideally weigh 95lbs. Gah.

    It seems the chart could be trying to correct for BMI having an issue with using a squared measurement, but people are kind of 3 dimensional - not that a BMI based on cubing height would scale right either.

    The chart also puts a 6'3" at 24.5 BMI, just at the edge of overweight, which would go with using a not perfectly squared height approached.
  • Laura48593
    Laura48593 Posts: 31 Member
    There was recently a 29 year old who passed away...he was the star of my 600 lb life. What if he had adopted a baby a few years earlier? Or similarly, would he have been able to get up and even care for the baby? I don’t know, it depends on how “fat” the person is. I feel like people who are in the 200 lb range are plenty capable of caring for a child. But in that case it’s more of a concern about life span and heart attacks and what kind of example you set. But do you really want to make someone grow up in an orphanage just because you are afraid they may have a “fat” parent? I think not. 600 lbs is too much. But if you can walk and carry and get on the floor with your child, it is perfectly fine.
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    Laura48593 wrote: »
    There was recently a 29 year old who passed away...he was the star of my 600 lb life. What if he had adopted a baby a few years earlier? Or similarly, would he have been able to get up and even care for the baby? I don’t know, it depends on how “fat” the person is. I feel like people who are in the 200 lb range are plenty capable of caring for a child. But in that case it’s more of a concern about life span and heart attacks and what kind of example you set. But do you really want to make someone grow up in an orphanage just because you are afraid they may have a “fat” parent? I think not. 600 lbs is too much. But if you can walk and carry and get on the floor with your child, it is perfectly fine.

    Did this person want to adopt a child? I don't know if we have to worry that people are lining up to adopt when they can't even physically care for children without knowing that this problem actually exists.
  • tbright1965
    tbright1965 Posts: 852 Member
    edited February 2019
    Edit - delete, cannot read tables today, DOH!


  • HeliumIsNoble
    HeliumIsNoble Posts: 1,213 Member
    edited February 2019
    jseams1234 wrote: »
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg

    Typo. That should be 4 foot 10.

    P.S. the 18.5-25 range for women 4 foot 11 tall is 94 to 123 lbs. As you can see, that piece of nonsense says they should all ideally weigh 95lbs. Gah.

    It seems the chart could be trying to correct for BMI having an issue with using a squared measurement, but people are kind of 3 dimensional - not that a BMI based on cubing height would scale right either.

    The chart also puts a 6'3" at 24.5 BMI, just at the edge of overweight, which would go with using a not perfectly squared height approached.
    I don't think the designer is doing anything that sophisticated. Notice how it's 5lbs per inch for women, and 6lbs per inch for men. There is a particular 'rule' that floats around that women's ideal weight can be calculated by allowing 100 pounds for the first 5 feet of height and then adding 5 pounds for every additional inch. There's a version for men, and I'd guess that's it on the left. As covered, the model breaks down severely when you try and extend to women under 5 foot, and the creator is a complete muppet to not have double-checked before subtracting 5lbs per inch for heights under 5 foot.

    If you're interested in seeing BMI calculations aimed to adjust for humans being 3-dimensional, go to ---> https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html

    http://www.ox.ac.uk/news/science-blog/does-my-bmi-look-big
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    sijomial wrote: »
    Laura48593 wrote: »
    There was recently a 29 year old who passed away...he was the star of my 600 lb life. What if he had adopted a baby a few years earlier? Or similarly, would he have been able to get up and even care for the baby? I don’t know, it depends on how “fat” the person is. I feel like people who are in the 200 lb range are plenty capable of caring for a child. But in that case it’s more of a concern about life span and heart attacks and what kind of example you set. But do you really want to make someone grow up in an orphanage just because you are afraid they may have a “fat” parent? I think not. 600 lbs is too much. But if you can walk and carry and get on the floor with your child, it is perfectly fine.

    On the other hand if you were responsible for placing a child for adoption and had a choice of potential parents wouldn't you choose the parents with the better chance of a long and healthy life? The needs of the child are more important than the wants of the parents.

    Often the reality of adoption is that the number of potential adopters is far greater than the number of children available for adoption.
    (Not the case for harder to place children though - sadly.)

    The "orphanage" part isn't quite accurate either, neither of my adopted children were orphans. The reasons for children needing to be adopted are many and varied.

    I think it's that the number of *babies* is much lower than the number of potential adopters. For older children or children with special needs, I frequently see outreach campaigns encouraging people to consider adopting them. Same for children who may not be up for adoption but may need long term foster care.

  • magnusthenerd
    magnusthenerd Posts: 1,207 Member
    jseams1234 wrote: »
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg

    Typo. That should be 4 foot 10.

    P.S. the 18.5-25 range for women 4 foot 11 tall is 94 to 123 lbs. As you can see, that piece of nonsense says they should all ideally weigh 95lbs. Gah.

    It seems the chart could be trying to correct for BMI having an issue with using a squared measurement, but people are kind of 3 dimensional - not that a BMI based on cubing height would scale right either.

    The chart also puts a 6'3" at 24.5 BMI, just at the edge of overweight, which would go with using a not perfectly squared height approached.
    I don't think the designer is doing anything that sophisticated. Notice how it's 5lbs per inch for women, and 6lbs per inch for men. There is a particular 'rule' that floats around that women's ideal weight can be calculated by allowing 100 pounds for the first 5 feet of height and then adding 5 pounds for every additional inch. There's a version for men, and I'd guess that's it on the left. As covered, the model breaks down severely when you try and extend to women under 5 foot, and the creator is a complete muppet to not have double-checked before subtracting 5lbs per inch for heights under 5 foot.

    If you're interested in seeing BMI calculations aimed to adjust for humans being 3-dimensional, go to ---> https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html

    http://www.ox.ac.uk/news/science-blog/does-my-bmi-look-big

    Sorry, didn't look over the whole chart. Yeah, +5 and +6 per inch seems to be the rule of thumb used.

    The first calculator seems odd in that it doesn't really document what it does, but looking at the javascript, what it does is amounts to normal BMI calculation *1.3/(height/100)^(1/2).
    It does put a height of 5' at a weight range of 90.96 to 121.6,
    4'11" at 86.25 to 116.6
    4'10" at 82.65 to 111.7.
    So by the new BMI calc, the weights shown wouldn't be ridiculous.
  • HeliumIsNoble
    HeliumIsNoble Posts: 1,213 Member
    jseams1234 wrote: »
    euronorris wrote: »
    kimny72 wrote: »
    ginagurl79 wrote: »
    Well look at these numbers/at 5’2 id be a bag of bones at 110. tyeo6i7cx2k0.jpeg

    But that's not BMI. I don't know what the heck it is, but for the heights that I'm familiar with, those "ideal" weights would be classified underweight by BMI.

    For a 5'7" female, it's smack bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range. It's my current target (gotta start somewhere).
    It might be okay for 5'7", but for those of shorter stature, it is seriously borked.

    For example, normal weight (BMI 18.5 to 25) for women 4'11 tall is actually 91-118lbs, and that chart specifies to aim for underneath that!

    Fricking hell.

    Table of weight ranges here: https://www.rush.edu/health-wellness/quick-guides/what-is-a-healthy-weight

    Huh?

    292ullhsyail.jpeg

    Typo. That should be 4 foot 10.

    P.S. the 18.5-25 range for women 4 foot 11 tall is 94 to 123 lbs. As you can see, that piece of nonsense says they should all ideally weigh 95lbs. Gah.

    It seems the chart could be trying to correct for BMI having an issue with using a squared measurement, but people are kind of 3 dimensional - not that a BMI based on cubing height would scale right either.

    The chart also puts a 6'3" at 24.5 BMI, just at the edge of overweight, which would go with using a not perfectly squared height approached.
    I don't think the designer is doing anything that sophisticated. Notice how it's 5lbs per inch for women, and 6lbs per inch for men. There is a particular 'rule' that floats around that women's ideal weight can be calculated by allowing 100 pounds for the first 5 feet of height and then adding 5 pounds for every additional inch. There's a version for men, and I'd guess that's it on the left. As covered, the model breaks down severely when you try and extend to women under 5 foot, and the creator is a complete muppet to not have double-checked before subtracting 5lbs per inch for heights under 5 foot.

    If you're interested in seeing BMI calculations aimed to adjust for humans being 3-dimensional, go to ---> https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html

    http://www.ox.ac.uk/news/science-blog/does-my-bmi-look-big

    Sorry, didn't look over the whole chart. Yeah, +5 and +6 per inch seems to be the rule of thumb used.

    The first calculator seems odd in that it doesn't really document what it does, but looking at the javascript, what it does is amounts to normal BMI calculation *1.3/(height/100)^(1/2).
    It does put a height of 5' at a weight range of 90.96 to 121.6,
    4'11" at 86.25 to 116.6
    4'10" at 82.65 to 111.7.
    So by the new BMI calc, the weights shown wouldn't be ridiculous.
    Yeah, I'm afraid you have to look elsewhere for an explanation behind the calculator. This is the reasoning for it, including the letter that was the initial impetus for it. http://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi.html

  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,809 Member
    sijomial wrote: »
    Laura48593 wrote: »
    There was recently a 29 year old who passed away...he was the star of my 600 lb life. What if he had adopted a baby a few years earlier? Or similarly, would he have been able to get up and even care for the baby? I don’t know, it depends on how “fat” the person is. I feel like people who are in the 200 lb range are plenty capable of caring for a child. But in that case it’s more of a concern about life span and heart attacks and what kind of example you set. But do you really want to make someone grow up in an orphanage just because you are afraid they may have a “fat” parent? I think not. 600 lbs is too much. But if you can walk and carry and get on the floor with your child, it is perfectly fine.

    On the other hand if you were responsible for placing a child for adoption and had a choice of potential parents wouldn't you choose the parents with the better chance of a long and healthy life? The needs of the child are more important than the wants of the parents.

    Often the reality of adoption is that the number of potential adopters is far greater than the number of children available for adoption.
    (Not the case for harder to place children though - sadly.)

    The "orphanage" part isn't quite accurate either, neither of my adopted children were orphans. The reasons for children needing to be adopted are many and varied.

    I think it's that the number of *babies* is much lower than the number of potential adopters. For older children or children with special needs, I frequently see outreach campaigns encouraging people to consider adopting them. Same for children who may not be up for adoption but may need long term foster care.

    Indeed.
    It's why the simplistic "should fat people be allowed to adopt" isn't a great question or one that can have a universal answer.
  • jennrissa
    jennrissa Posts: 42 Member
    The only thing I can think about is an episode of my 600lb life where a little boy had to take care of his mother. He was barely as tall as the washer and dryer and he was the one doing the cleaning and cooking... I was afraid he'd hurt himself getting stuck in the washing machine. He was so small.
This discussion has been closed.