My Boyfriend thinks I'm Fat

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  • LAnne16
    LAnne16 Posts: 272 Member
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    Ridiculous!
    There is no way to get over this if you have an adult conversation with him and tell him straight up how it's affecting you.

    If my boyfriend thought I was getting fatter... I'd want him to tell me. ... But I wouldn't want him to be an *kitten* about it! There's a level of honesty allowed in relationships but he shouldn't be making you feel like this.

    If he's unwilling to change, then you need to make a real decision about him.
  • Pampiress
    Pampiress Posts: 1
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    If he can't love you for you, then get rid of him! you are 5'6" and only weigh 140! I wish I weighed that! Get you a man that loves you for you, not if you look like a swimsuit model.
  • arvernegirl
    arvernegirl Posts: 2 Member
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    You need to find a guy who appreciates you. This guy sounds like he is making you feel insecure, and I would wonder why he needs to do this.
    If he truly likes thinner women he should find one and stop picking on you.
  • action_figure
    action_figure Posts: 511 Member
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    I think my husband is old. I mean, he's 45.

    lol... 45 is old? wow.

    I'm 41. I married him when he was a hot 31 year old.

    LOL....hate to tell ya, then you're old too.

    Are you kidding? I'm four years YOUNGER than him.

    Also, my kids are three and one, so they're not old enough yet to tell me how out-of-it I am. I have at least three more years of grace.

    So you honestly think that because you are a measly 4 years younger then him, that he is old yet you are not?
    My husband is 46. I am 39. My husband is far from old. If you feel your husband is old at 45, I hate to say it, you need to add yourself to that bracket as well.

    Google "irony".
  • brendadale1
    brendadale1 Posts: 90 Member
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    My opinion this is a type of emotional and mental abuse...No human needs that, in the world in which we live.
  • action_figure
    action_figure Posts: 511 Member
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    All, thank you for the support. I am starting to realize after reading these comments that I need to stand up for myself way more when it comes to him commenting on my weight.

    He does not literally look at me and call me "fat", but he does say things like, "you are out of shape" or "you have the potential to look amazing." He has a complex about his father, who is terribly obese and he is terrified I will somehow end up the same way if I don't always look skinny. I know that he shouldn't be taking this insecurity out on me, but at least there is a reason for it.

    Also, this is literally the first time I have posted anything anywhere other than facebook, so can someone please tell me what a "troll post" is...and possibly avoid using crazy acronyms becuase I don't know what they mean.

    DTMFA is from Dan Savage. It means "Dump the Mother F**ker Already."
  • olphvarox
    olphvarox Posts: 3
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    Sounds like you should not be with this guy. 5'6" and 145 lbs is healthy.

    If you feel like you need to lose weight then do it for you. Don't do it cos of what someone else thinks of you. It's hard sometimes because we care about what others think, but the most important opinion is your own.
  • TinGirl314
    TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
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    Wow...and some of these responses....
    Look at the person you fell in love with, you're still the same people.
    Ask him what you guys are going to do when you're 75-80 and a bag of wrinkles, and he is too!

    Dig deeper society.
    Smh. -_-
  • MelMelMiller
    MelMelMiller Posts: 54
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    I agree that you should do stuff for yourself. It you're comfortable with your body, than he should also be comfortable with it. And if not, I'm sure somebody else will love and appreciate you, just the way you are. =)
  • blt0087
    blt0087 Posts: 115
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    Your boyfriend thinks you're fat? Well, I ain't down with that.

    :laugh:
  • mjones6599
    mjones6599 Posts: 129
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    My husband and I have been together for 16 years and we married when I was a size 2. After 10 years and 3 kids, I ballooned up to 205 pounds, and wore a size 20. I have recently lost 80 pounds and I am back down to a size 4, yet I have I to pry a "you look good" comment from him like I am pulling teeth.

    I never got upset with him, but I wondered why he couldn't dole out a compliment here or there. Then it dawned on me: he was happy with ME at the size 2, he was happy with ME at the size 20, and he is happy with ME now at my current size. In other words, he is happy with ME, my weight and size are irrelevant!

    Those guys are out there and you can't find one if you are attached to that guy.

    So, drop the loser, drop a few pounds (if you so desire), find yourself a winner ~ then BAM! FLAUNT IT IN HIS FACE!
  • volume77
    volume77 Posts: 670 Member
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    punch him in the face and get a REAL man.
  • mjones6599
    mjones6599 Posts: 129
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    Your boyfriend thinks you're fat? Well, I ain't down with that.

    :laugh:

    Do you like big butts? I know, You cannot lie!
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
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    So when he woke up from you knocking him out did he have a change of heart? Or did you toss his azz out on the front porch?
  • alyhuggan
    alyhuggan Posts: 717 Member
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    Gonna get hate but people need to stop sugar coating everything. No-body gets motivation to lose weight by being told they are a "perfect weight"
  • kimosabe1
    kimosabe1 Posts: 2,467 Member
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    get rid of him! it isn't smart keeping someone that calls u fat before u bear a child!
  • footiechick82
    footiechick82 Posts: 1,203 Member
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    You're boyfriend is an *kitten*.

    My ex use to tell me "no fat chicks." I'm 5'7 and the heaviest I was with him was 145lbs... I wasn't big at all.

    I was 136 last time I weighed myself, either way... he's a douche and you deserve to be told you're beautiful and treated like a queen. Otherwise *kitten* that douche!
  • alwaysa1stgrader
    alwaysa1stgrader Posts: 2
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    I'm going to suggest something a little different than the other posts. You obviously care about him or you wouldn't be asking this or hanging around. Your boyfriend may very well be an abuser. But he could also just be totally unaware. Some men are like that. I would suggest that before you throw out someone you care about, you have an earnest sit-down talk with him. Does he know how his comments make you feel? - A question to you - have you accepted his comments on your weight without objection in the past? If you have, it's time to object. It's time to let him know how his attacks have hurt you, that you want to be happy with your body FOR YOU, whether or not he's happy about it.

    If you don't get answers that satisfy you, then it really is time to point him toward the door.
  • tlc12078
    tlc12078 Posts: 334 Member
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    He sounds like a complete asstard, Js
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,723 Member
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    Your boyfriend thinks you're fat? Well, I ain't down with that.

    Dammit. I read through seven pages of crap to get to the last page and see what I came to post.

    Your boyfriends not important. It's what Cosmo thinks


    ...and on Sir Mix-a-lot's birtbday!

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