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Thoughts on getting old vs aging
Replies
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I'm 59 tomorrow and if the weather is kind I'm planning on cycling 59 miles to mark the occasion.
Aging is a battle we will all lose someday, I'm just intending that the days up to that point are the best I can manage in terms of physical, mental and emotional health.
I retired at 58 and it's been great, loads more time to do the things I enjoy, far less time stuck at a desk, new challenges in the form of a (very) part time job.
I see quite a lot of evidence of a generational shift from my parent's generation to mine as regards exercise. My gym has a load of older people not just exercising but training hard and purposefully. I also see a lot of quite old cyclists doing long distance events and it always strikes me how common the correlation between physical fitness, a social setting and a challenge is reflected in their joie de vivre.12 -
I'm 59 tomorrow and if the weather is kind I'm planning on cycling 59 miles to mark the occasion.
Aging is a battle we will all lose someday, I'm just intending that the days up to that point are the best I can manage in terms of physical, mental and emotional health.
I retired at 58 and it's been great, loads more time to do the things I enjoy, far less time stuck at a desk, new challenges in the form of a (very) part time job.
I see quite a lot of evidence of a generational shift from my parent's generation to mine as regards exercise. My gym has a load of older people not just exercising but training hard and purposefully. I also see a lot of quite old cyclists doing long distance events and it always strikes me how common the correlation between physical fitness, a social setting and a challenge is reflected in their joie de vivre.
Happy Birthday!3 -
Love it! I'm 48 and my wife would probably grant me a solid 13.
I see much of this as focusing on the wrong things. There is no diet that is going to fundamentally change society. Supplying that which has not been earned is an insult.
Man requires purpose to thrive. If you drill down to every negative act it comes down to loss of purpose.
I do an annual run with my teammates and those leading the pack are well into their 60's. These are men who never lost their sense of purpose, but transitioned this from work to something else that they can do as they age.
I totally agree with that. Having a purpose as we age gives us a reason to get out of bed. My husband and I have been talking about this a lot recently. He is close to 50 and I'm in my mid 40's. Our kids will be out of the house in just a few years. We both want to move into careers that have a greater purpose. Right now, I've stayed in my current position because it is stable, pays well and is extremely flexible. But it's just a job to me. I have no passion for it. I want to use my time on this earth to make a positive difference in people's lives. To make the world just a little better. Not just to collect a paycheck. Once our financial obligation to our kids is over, we both are more than willing to take lesser pay to have a more fulfilling job. And I don't see myself not working (either in a paid or unpaid capacity) until I'm probably in my 80's or more. My grandmother was a nurse and was still taking care of people into her early 90's. I have excellent genetics and plan on living until at least 100 so I want to make the most out of it. Staying mentally and physically active is important to achieving my goals.9 -
Like many of us, I’ve lived a life that hasn’t always been kind to me and I’ve spent a long time healing from some kind of terrible things.
I’ve only recently really started to feel like I’m alive and fully participating in life. And now that I am-I want to participate in EVERYTHING. I have such an incredibly long (and ever growing) list of things I am compelled to do. And I grab every possible opportunity that comes my way (see flying trapeze profile pic lol)
I turn another year older tomorrow. (45). I don’t know how old I’m supposed to feel. I do know that my primary health and fitness goals are to be around, alive, active and capable until I have squeezed out every ounce of life and adventure.7 -
mom23mangos wrote: »Love it! I'm 48 and my wife would probably grant me a solid 13.
I see much of this as focusing on the wrong things. There is no diet that is going to fundamentally change society. Supplying that which has not been earned is an insult.
Man requires purpose to thrive. If you drill down to every negative act it comes down to loss of purpose.
I do an annual run with my teammates and those leading the pack are well into their 60's. These are men who never lost their sense of purpose, but transitioned this from work to something else that they can do as they age.
I totally agree with that. Having a purpose as we age gives us a reason to get out of bed. My husband and I have been talking about this a lot recently. He is close to 50 and I'm in my mid 40's. Our kids will be out of the house in just a few years. We both want to move into careers that have a greater purpose. Right now, I've stayed in my current position because it is stable, pays well and is extremely flexible. But it's just a job to me. I have no passion for it. I want to use my time on this earth to make a positive difference in people's lives. To make the world just a little better. Not just to collect a paycheck. Once our financial obligation to our kids is over, we both are more than willing to take lesser pay to have a more fulfilling job. And I don't see myself not working (either in a paid or unpaid capacity) until I'm probably in my 80's or more. My grandmother was a nurse and was still taking care of people into her early 90's. I have excellent genetics and plan on living until at least 100 so I want to make the most out of it. Staying mentally and physically active is important to achieving my goals.
@mom23mangos - my wife and I frequently discuss that. We're both aching to move into something better, something that adds something good to peoples lives and we just can't leave our current jobs yet. I wish you and your husband all the good fortune making your move.
@sijomial - Happy Birthday!
@TheRoadDog - I missed your post earlier - I love hearing experiences like yours. Thanks.1 -
I want to share my own story I'm 68, and like many of you, I'm in the best shape of my life. I've worked hard over the last three years to regain the health and strength I need to continue indulging my love, which is long distance cycling. Over the past several years I've gone from feeling old and tired, and like short social rides were appropriate to my age, to getting back into metric centuries (~63 miles), to signing up for a full 100 mile century at the end of this April. I also started running a year and a half ago, and have worked my way up to the occasional 10K.
I have so much more confidence in myself now, and am so much more willing to try new things, or pick up old things I used to do, and after losing down to a healthy weight and pushing myself to become physically and mentally stronger, I identify as a much younger woman internally, when I think about age at all.21 -
I was fat (obese) depressed and had injured my knee so severe at 42 that I couldn't walk for year.
I'm 54 today and I've lost 70 lbs (and gained back 15 in muscle). I'm in better cardio shape than I've ever been, though I do get injuries more often. I have a nagging back injury from training right now. I've shifted to an Assault Bike now over rower.
Planning on competing next year at the World Indoor Rowing Championships if it's in the US again (it might be in Europe, so we'll see). Since getting in shape, I've met people that are in so much better shape than I am and are even older than I am. I met a guy at Pickleball that was 86 and was really great at Pickleball!
If you can move, move and stay active as much as possible! I'm actually moving in three weeks from the Midwest to the mountains in AZ so we can enjoy more time outdoors moving and walking. I honestly think losing weight helped me in my career and with my discipline at my business, allowing my wife and I to achieve our dreams.8 -
@Phirrgus The Blue Zones researchers make it really clear that while the diets of people in the BZs are important, there is a pretty good chance that their healthy longevity comes from their lifestyles - they still work, play, socialize, etc right through their 90s and past 100. In the book they talk to a 100+ man who still herds his animals walking several miles with them every day. Our assumption that being past a certain age means becoming a dependent lump I think really handicaps us in western society.
My parents are in their 70s and just retired to VA. They had a 2 story house built on a decent sized piece of land, and everyone told them they were nuts to make their retirement home with stairs and a big yard to care for. But their philosophy is use it or lose it. If I have to get up the stairs, I'll prioritize being capable of getting up the stairs.
I"m 61 and this is it in a nutshell for me.
At 54, I finally decided to lose weight and get active and its been a game changer. My energy level is very high, leading to lots of opportunities to do fun things now that our kids are grown. The other thing that my wife and I have done is to associate with a group of friends who are very active. This has led to many great times as our group plans trips together, everything from a cycling day trip, to "racing vacations" where we travel to a resort and build a vacation around racing events, such as marathons or triathlons. Most of us are in our late 50s or early 60s, but we see no end in sight, since this is a lifestyle. We are happiest when we are working towards a goal, and that often means training for a race.
And for anyone who doubts that rigorous exercise is possible or even advisable for those in their late 60's, 70's and beyond, just look at the participants list for any Ironman race. Simply find a race and check the age group participants list. You will typically see 60-75 entrants in the Men's 55-59 age group and over 20-30 entrants in the 60-64 group. And there are always entrants in their mid-late 70s. It is very inspiring!
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My gym has a load of older people not just exercising but training hard and purposefully. I also see a lot of quite old cyclists doing long distance events and it always strikes me how common the correlation between physical fitness, a social setting and a challenge is reflected in their joie de vivre.
EXACTLY!0 -
I imagine at age 36 with a three-year-old and a one-year-old I feel a hell of a lot older than I will at 50 when I'm allowed to get back into decent shape, sleep periodically, and remember who that woman is wandering around my house at all hours.8
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TheRoadDog wrote: »MostlyWater wrote: »I find that hard to believe. As we age, our kids are older and on their own more and work becomes less of a competition. We actually have the time to take care of ourselves ... and at some point, if we don't, we get a wake-up call to do so.
54 years old here - and I'm usually the oldest one in my group fitness classes at the gym, too - and have been for years now.
I played soccer for almost 40 years. By the time I quit, I had played with this one guy, his son AND his grandson. I was easily 20 years older than anyone in the League.
I know a gentleman about your age who coaches and plays in rugby leagues out here in Idaho. Punishes the doo-doo out of the younger guys with tackles and sheer speed.0 -
Duck_Puddle wrote: »Like many of us, I’ve lived a life that hasn’t always been kind to me and I’ve spent a long time healing from some kind of terrible things.
I’ve only recently really started to feel like I’m alive and fully participating in life. And now that I am-I want to participate in EVERYTHING. I have such an incredibly long (and ever growing) list of things I am compelled to do. And I grab every possible opportunity that comes my way (see flying trapeze profile pic lol)
I turn another year older tomorrow. (45). I don’t know how old I’m supposed to feel. I do know that my primary health and fitness goals are to be around, alive, active and capable until I have squeezed out every ounce of life and adventure.
Happy Birthday!2 -
Great topic! I love reading everyone's stories.
I turned 50 a few months ago. I wasn't sure how I would feel. But I woke up so excited to have this next half of my life (I'm optimistic!).
When was 47 I started running. It had only been over 30 years since I used to run with my dad. I was still about 55 pounds overweight. It was hard. I also taught myself to do push-ups again. Also hard when very overweight.
Today I am more physically active than I was at 20, 30 or 40. And I'm planning a thru hike of the PCT.
I may be aging, but doesn't mean that I cannot be super active.8 -
One of the common traits with the Blue Zones is being active into the 80s, 90s and even beyond. I'm a fairly sedentary 40 year old and this is my one area of weakness that I really want to work on. I see my elderly neighbors out walking twice a day in all sorts of weather conditions, while I sit on my bum
My big goal this year is to start walking regularly. Yesterday I did 1.5 miles and it felt great, now to just keep at it!
@zeejane03 I watched this Dr. talk about blue zones he has visited or grew up in. It seems many in the Blue Zones even grow their own food/buy it fresh from a local market and they eat plant based diets for the most part with little to no processed foods or red meat.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=evGFWRXEzz81 -
GaleHawkins wrote: »One of the common traits with the Blue Zones is being active into the 80s, 90s and even beyond. I'm a fairly sedentary 40 year old and this is my one area of weakness that I really want to work on. I see my elderly neighbors out walking twice a day in all sorts of weather conditions, while I sit on my bum My big goal this year is to start walking regularly. Yesterday I did 1.5 miles and it felt great, now to just keep at it!
@zeejane03 I watched this Dr. talk about blue zones he has visited or grew up in. It seems many in the Blue Zones even grow their own food/buy it fresh from a local market and they eat plant based diets for the most part with little to no processed foods or red meat.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=evGFWRXEzz8
Yep, one of the common food traits of the Blue Zones is a predominately plant based diet, using animal products only a few times a month (and one of the zones is a vegetarian community).1 -
I'm 72, enjoying a sense of freedom and serenity that eluded me in all my earlier years of strife and struggle. Being old has allowed me to be more fully myself. I feel blessed to have good health and the ability to be active, both mentally and physically.11
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I'm reading and loving every reply I see on this. I can't begin to say how refreshing it is. I don't want to convey the wrong impression regarding why I posted this discussion...my family is loaded with wonderful people who love having fun at my expense lol, and it's reciprocated - but the mindset is still there, not to mention just what I see and hear living life every day.
To everyone who has posted so far, thanks. Please don't stop one single second before you have to. 7 -
@spinnerdell at 68 I feel the same way and seeing my health become better year by year for the past 4 years is totally awesome just from changing my way of thinking, eating and moving.1
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Keep your health and mobility! Age is so much more fun with it.
There’s a 98 year old volunteer in my church who is out three days a week organizing bread for the hungry. You betcha he inspires many more to keep helping.
The seniors in my church, the thriving ones, have a full dance card.
That’s the way to live.6 -
Tbh my mother is in her early 50s, and sometimes I find myself thinking how immature she is for the sole fact that her personality, she’s really giddy and bubbly and it reminds me of girls my age and it used to make me cringe. But when I think about it....how can I expect her personality to change just because she’s getting older in age?
That doesn’t even make sense. I feel bad for thinking that way.
Lmfao at the youngster for calling you elderly,
people in their 20s and younger view anything older than 30 to be old until they reach there, don’t worry. 6 -
IA 20 something year old friend of my daughter in law told me it was great to see the "elderly" trying to stay fit! I was mortified!
I just wanted to address this bit. As someone who is 31, I am not quite sure where the age threshold of who I'd consider "old" is. From what I've experienced and what I've heard from various people in their 20s and 30s, I think the fact that I have a really diverse age range of people I consider friends/acquaintances is why that's the case. Multiple people in their 70s down to people in their 20s.
I'm always bemused when people in their 50s and 60s tell me that I must think that they're they're "[really] old". That's more or less been my stance since I was 20, if not younger. Between doing things that people like to think trend older - knitting and spinning (yarn), being in non-sports related groups with people who are much older than I am (I was the youngest regular attendee at the German group I went to before we disbanded, the oldest two people were in their 70s), and knowing multiple people in their 50s-70s who do various sports.
I also don't think I've ever called anyone elderly to their face (and I can't imagine I'd ever do so). I suspect my "elderly" category begins at 80. I'd consider my grandmother elderly - she's in her 80s but is also fairly active.1 -
I think it might be something that varies from person to person. I was very fit when I was young, but now in my late fifties, with longterm health conditions and buckets of medication, I feel like every ounce of fitness is very hardwon. Everything is so, so much harder than it was in the past. Not to mention, more painful!
For instance, I was happily doing heavy lifting at 50. At 50, I felt mentally invigorated and "tired in a good way" after a session. A couple of years later, I was struggling to make it through a session without crying and afterwards felt completely drained and hopeless. I gave it up, for the sake of my mental health.
I would love to be able to say it's all about attitude and mindset! But as much as I try to maintain a young outlook, my body is letting me down. I see people older than me who are not having this experience, so I know it's not just about age, but I don't know what makes the difference for people who are making the effort to keep fit. Genetics? Health conditions? Medication? Hormones? Who knows! I just know the experience isn't the same for everybody.
Anyway ... I'm still working at it, because I know the situation would be worse if I gave up! I would be so happy if people were asking me "Don't you know how old you are?"! It would be wonderful to feel and act younger!5 -
I think it might be something that varies from person to person. I was very fit when I was young, but now in my late fifties, with longterm health conditions and buckets of medication, I feel like every ounce of fitness is very hardwon. Everything is so, so much harder than it was in the past. Not to mention, more painful!
For instance, I was happily doing heavy lifting at 50. At 50, I felt mentally invigorated and "tired in a good way" after a session. A couple of years later, I was struggling to make it through a session without crying and afterwards felt completely drained and hopeless. I gave it up, for the sake of my mental health.
I would love to be able to say it's all about attitude and mindset! But as much as I try to maintain a young outlook, my body is letting me down. I see people older than me who are not having this experience, so I know it's not just about age, but I don't know what makes the difference for people who are making the effort to keep fit. Genetics? Health conditions? Medication? Hormones? Who knows! I just know the experience isn't the same for everybody.
Anyway ... I'm still working at it, because I know the situation would be worse if I gave up! I would be so happy if people were asking me "Don't you know how old you are?"! It would be wonderful to feel and act younger!
@Vailara - I don't think anyone in their right mind would criticize you for dealing with health conditions. I've been known to grumble a bit at my own, which are fairly minor compared to others. I also know it's it's easy to throw platitudes out there, which are worthless
I'm glad you posted though...see..we're all, everyone..is potentially only a moment away from something, whether accident or illness, that could steal our hard fought for health. I think it's wise to keep that in mind, and to keep an attitude of gratitude for each moment I do not have to deal with something debilitating.
Whatever you're facing, I hope you have some good support, and I truly wish you the best...4 -
IA 20 something year old friend of my daughter in law told me it was great to see the "elderly" trying to stay fit! I was mortified!
I just wanted to address this bit. As someone who is 31, I am not quite sure where the age threshold of who I'd consider "old" is. From what I've experienced and what I've heard from various people in their 20s and 30s, I think the fact that I have a really diverse age range of people I consider friends/acquaintances is why that's the case. Multiple people in their 70s down to people in their 20s.
I'm always bemused when people in their 50s and 60s tell me that I must think that they're they're "[really] old". That's more or less been my stance since I was 20, if not younger. Between doing things that people like to think trend older - knitting and spinning (yarn), being in non-sports related groups with people who are much older than I am (I was the youngest regular attendee at the German group I went to before we disbanded, the oldest two people were in their 70s), and knowing multiple people in their 50s-70s who do various sports.
I also don't think I've ever called anyone elderly to their face (and I can't imagine I'd ever do so). I suspect my "elderly" category begins at 80. I'd consider my grandmother elderly - she's in her 80s but is also fairly active.
My daughters (biased yes ) treat me as if I'm in their age group. I'm one of those super blessed people in that the parent/child relationship has morphed into close, sincere friendships.
It is amusing sometimes though, when one of thier friends is surprised when the "old man" is doing things they would expect out of a much younger person lol.4 -
Tbh my mother is in her early 50s, and sometimes I find myself thinking how immature she is for the sole fact that her personality, she’s really giddy and bubbly and it reminds me of girls my age and it used to make me cringe. But when I think about it....how can I expect her personality to change just because she’s getting older in age?
That doesn’t even make sense. I feel bad for thinking that way.
Lmfao at the youngster for calling you elderly, people in their 20s and younger view anything older than 30 to be old until they reach there, don’t worry.
You should have heard my wife's reply 0 -
Keep your health and mobility! Age is so much more fun with it.
There’s a 98 year old volunteer in my church who is out three days a week organizing bread for the hungry. You betcha he inspires many more to keep helping.
The seniors in my church, the thriving ones, have a full dance card.
That’s the way to live.
Yes 1 -
Tbh my mother is in her early 50s, and sometimes I find myself thinking how immature she is for the sole fact that her personality, she’s really giddy and bubbly and it reminds me of girls my age and it used to make me cringe. But when I think about it....how can I expect her personality to change just because she’s getting older in age?
That doesn’t even make sense. I feel bad for thinking that way.
Lmfao at the youngster for calling you elderly, people in their 20s and younger view anything older than 30 to be old until they reach there, don’t worry.
You should have heard my wife's reply
Is it too rated R for MFP?
0 -
Tbh my mother is in her early 50s, and sometimes I find myself thinking how immature she is for the sole fact that her personality, she’s really giddy and bubbly and it reminds me of girls my age and it used to make me cringe. But when I think about it....how can I expect her personality to change just because she’s getting older in age?
That doesn’t even make sense. I feel bad for thinking that way.
Lmfao at the youngster for calling you elderly, people in their 20s and younger view anything older than 30 to be old until they reach there, don’t worry.
You should have heard my wife's reply
Is it too rated R for MFP?
Oh yeah My best half is generally very soft spoken and thoughful - I think she surprised herself lol. 0 -
@Phirrgus The Blue Zones researchers make it really clear that while the diets of people in the BZs are important, there is a pretty good chance that their healthy longevity comes from their lifestyles - they still work, play, socialize, etc right through their 90s and past 100. In the book they talk to a 100+ man who still herds his animals walking several miles with them every day. Our assumption that being past a certain age means becoming a dependent lump I think really handicaps us in western society.
My parents are in their 70s and just retired to VA. They had a 2 story house built on a decent sized piece of land, and everyone told them they were nuts to make their retirement home with stairs and a big yard to care for. But their philosophy is use it or lose it. If I have to get up the stairs, I'll prioritize being capable of getting up the stairs.
I"m 61 and this is it in a nutshell for me.
At 54, I finally decided to lose weight and get active and its been a game changer. My energy level is very high, leading to lots of opportunities to do fun things now that our kids are grown. The other thing that my wife and I have done is to associate with a group of friends who are very active. This has led to many great times as our group plans trips together, everything from a cycling day trip, to "racing vacations" where we travel to a resort and build a vacation around racing events, such as marathons or triathlons. Most of us are in our late 50s or early 60s, but we see no end in sight, since this is a lifestyle. We are happiest when we are working towards a goal, and that often means training for a race.
And for anyone who doubts that rigorous exercise is possible or even advisable for those in their late 60's, 70's and beyond, just look at the participants list for any Ironman race. Simply find a race and check the age group participants list. You will typically see 60-75 entrants in the Men's 55-59 age group and over 20-30 entrants in the 60-64 group. And there are always entrants in their mid-late 70s. It is very inspiring!
Several of these folks are in my Online Indoor Rowing Training club. The one guy started rowing at 52 and just finished this race a couple of months ago (I think he's 56 now). I'm pretty sure his team set a record crossing the Atlantic.
https://www.taliskerwhiskyatlanticchallenge.com/2018-race-entrants/2
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