Do you want people to comment on your weight loss?

Emmapatterson1729

For me, it depends on who the comment is coming from.

If it's my daughter or boyfriend saying, "Damn, you've lost more" or "You're looking great, weightloss is showing."

I know they're sincere and care about my health.

People on MFP, especially friends list, who comment on progress, I like. Most are on the same mission or have been where I am and can still relate.

Most others, I'm indifferent to.

happysquidmuffin

I’m very much an introvert but for certain things, I do like and want attention, and my weight is one of those things for some weird reason. It’s no secret to my family that I’m losing the baby weight and am very happy about it, but I also am hoping that my boss, who I haven’t seen in a few weeks and won’t see again for about 3 more, notices and comments on my weight loss at some point when I go back to work. I’m just proud of the changes I’ve made and want to hear the validation that I’m doing well, from others.

yayamom3

It doesn't really matter to me either way, although it does make me a little uncomfortable sometimes. But I would give just about anything for my mom to say something. I've lost 35 pounds and still waiting... She's not the mean or vindictive type. I just think she hasn't noticed for whatever reason.

TheMrWobbly

We are human beings - we want validation. We don't all need validation, yet it is nice to have it.

Of course it can make us feel awkward at times though after the first couple you get used to just saying 'thank you' and moving the topic of conversation on. You may feel embarrassed in the first instance however you will think about it later in a nice way.

For those who say you don't like as other people are looking at your body - people do genuine make polite comments just because they are nice especially when they know you are making an effort. Don't be offend that people actually take an interest in you.

Personally on my third round of losing weight, 2 of which I gained it all back again, this one is entirely for me, only my view matters right now - though I still find it nice when others notice.

peachvine29

Live4ADandL wrote: »

peachvine29 wrote: »

I don't need people to comment for my health and fitness motivation at all, I'm very self motivated, but I do actually usually like comments and acknowledgement, as long as they are positive! I've gotten many nice comments and it feels good to me. However, I do not like the negative comments, such as that I look sick, asking if I eat, telling me I'm wasting away. If you don't have something nice to say, then don't say it!

I've had the too thin or wasting away comments years ago when I lost weight. Of course I ate enough and exercise and my B.M.I was still normal range too. Sometimes I think it's just jealousy, other times it's the shock of how quickly 'to them they think you lost weight. Also it's easier to notice weight loss in faces when it comes off fairly quick or a steady pace so people just by that too. I'm in the process again of losing more weight this time after my third child and gaining a bunch from not trying to eat healthy and my SO liking to cook together. Anyway...I'm sure I'll get the good with the bad comments again. My health has always been decent with the weight gain but definitely felt better at my lighter weight range! I also want to avoid health issues so I need to lose weight. My goal right now is 100lbs. Years ago I lost at most 40lbs in about 3 months doing low carb and exercise, so not an abnormal rate for most people who are actively focused. I'm not sure why other people make someone's weight their business.
So yes, I like positive comments....but could do without the negative comments from people who typically keep failing at their own goal so they bring others down.

I lost at a pretty slow rate actually, on an average of about half to at most one pound a week, so it really wasn't that quick either! It was a total of about 65 lbs. though since highest weight, I was 190 last February and now I'm 135.

Really the only negative comments I think have just come from one person, this lady at my work, who says these really inappropriate things and I can't understand it. She's told me I'm looking pale, I look sick, has talked to coworkers telling them I look too skinny and tells me that they both think I need to stop losing, sees me preparing my lunch and says I'm glad you're eating, and she genuinely sounds concerned. I really don't think she's trying to be mean, she's just very clueless socially I guess?

She asked how I lost weight and I told her calorie counting and she looked so confused and didn't really say anything. I don't get it and I try avoiding her at work because she makes me feel so uncomfortable. She's actually the manager of the department my director is considering pushing me towards. Don't really want to work for her lol!

She is also overweight, I know she is interested in losing, maybe she is jealous or something and I just don't get her personality.

SuzySunshine99

Very few people commented to me about it, which is fine with me. I'm not the type of person that likes attention or needs affirmation. The people who did say something, I was okay with that, too, but I just said "thanks" and then changed the subject.

HOWEVER, here's what I didn't like....
Many of my co-workers know my husband and work with him on various jobs. He told me that a lot of them commented to HIM about my weight loss. I found that a little creepy and awkward.

gabi_texanmom

denjan333 wrote: »

I honestly don’t think it’s appropriate to bring up peoples’ weight. I especially don’t appreciate when people start with the “you’re wasting away” garbage when you’re clearly still not even normal size. Just stop. I promise I won’t bring it up that you’re too skinny and flabby, or wrinkly, or you gained weight. To me, it’s all off limits conversation.

Yes! Why can't people understand that people's weight and appearance is off-limits? My mother has a bad habit of analyzing and scrutinizing my weight, size, appearance. It drives me nuts. I am ok with my hubby and daughters telling me they can see a difference or my hard work is paying off. But co-workers and casual aquaintances? No thank you.

threewins

It depends. Only positive comments. However, someone I sat next to at work asked me "are you gaining weight?" and I am grateful that she did.

hmhill17

Depends on who says it. Random work person I barely know or parent at my kids' school who I only see at carpool then it might feel a little weird because it is kind of like this random person is watching me. At the same time, it would be good to hear that I've made enough progress that a person I barely know noticed it.

I'd be more upset if someone I know well, whether I see them regularly or not, didn't notice a change.

TheMrWobbly

gabi_texanmom wrote: »

denjan333 wrote: »

I honestly don’t think it’s appropriate to bring up peoples’ weight. I especially don’t appreciate when people start with the “you’re wasting away” garbage when you’re clearly still not even normal size. Just stop. I promise I won’t bring it up that you’re too skinny and flabby, or wrinkly, or you gained weight. To me, it’s all off limits conversation.

Yes! Why can't people understand that people's weight and appearance is off-limits? My mother has a bad habit of analyzing and scrutinizing my weight, size, appearance. It drives me nuts. I am ok with my hubby and daughters telling me they can see a difference or my hard work is paying off. But co-workers and casual aquaintances? No thank you.

Your appearance is never off limits for a compliment to those you regularly interact with. It is your first presentation to the rest of the world - accept it. People generally want to be nice, it makes them feel good about themselves as well when they can give someone a compliment. This ridiculously insular world is making us too afraid of offending somebody to be nice and it will kill human goodness. Take a compliment nicely, allow it to make you feel a little better about your efforts and pass on that happiness.

cheryldumais

Absolutely I love it when someone comments! I am amazed at how many people don't like it. I've got to be more careful about commenting, lol. It makes me feel so good to be normal now that when someone comments I am encouraged to keep it off. If it's someone I don't know well I just smile and say thanks but if someone asks about it I'm happy to share my experience. Guess I'm the weird one now.

Taytaylynn92

I love it, nothing better to me than someone asking if I’ve lost weight.

MySlimGoals

I can't even see it in the photos I have taken of myself in the same position in the same clothes yet. So I am looking forward to not only the day I can see the change myself, but when other people notice. When people start noticing I will feel accomplished and hopefully, it will be motivating. I heard that at 20lbs you start to notice and at 30-40lbs lost other people notice. I'm moving up past 16lbs lost now so not so far to go.

koalathebear

I'm not fussed if they do or they don't. I don't like it when they comment and get weirdly defensive/justify their own physical state, like me losing weight is in some way a judgment on them / indictment on them. I find those people weird and kind of annoying. I'd rather they didn't comment then instead of having to tell me how much they love food, how they don't have time to waste on exercise how they want to enjoy life more blah blah blah. Those people don't want to listen when I tell them that I'm still enjoying life, that I eat what I want - just carefully - and eat within my calorie budget but can still enjoy all the foods I used to ...

if people just comment factually or are nice about it, then I'm ok with it

angfirst

It depends. A person who gives an occassional compliment, 👍. A person who constantly comments, 👎.

But, it also depends on how it’s phrased...compliments that end with “now” (you look great now or you are so pretty now) or compliments from people stating how “proud” they are of me irk me.

elisa123gal

All we can do in life is control our own behavior and our responses to others behavior. Some mention weight loss to be kind, supportive, or curious. Other's never mention it..fearing to be nosy or not wanting to put a person on the spot. No one mentions weight loss to be cruel intentionally.

So.. I roll with it .... it is all pretty harmless either way.

lolapop8

It would be nice if people commented on my weight loss because sometimes I can't tell if I'm getting any smaller. Comments make me feel like all my hard work is paying off.