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What’s a red flag for you?

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  • jruch23jruch23 Member Posts: 972 Member Member Posts: 972 Member
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/
  • vanityy99vanityy99 Member Posts: 2,254 Member Member Posts: 2,254 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    We been saying that.

    Asking for a break is the cruelest thing one can ask for from another person. Here you are weeks, months later being hopeful, and waiting, wasting your time.
    edited January 14
  • jessienanijessienani Member Posts: 50 Member Member Posts: 50 Member
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    We been saying that.

    Asking for a break is the cruelest thing can one can ask for from another person. Here you are weeks, months later being hopeful, and waiting, wasting your time.

    My ex recommended a break and then hooked up with another dude.. Lol I am no fan of breaks :(
  • sloth2notsloth2not Member Posts: 497 Member Member Posts: 497 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    I don’t want my words to cause distress as they are only my opinion. I hope you take them with a grain of salt because only you know your situation. I think typically when a person asks for space it’s because they want to end things, but don’t have the courage. Instead of limbo land, ask how long is this break for? Set a time to talk again and if they still want space either continue to give it, check in again or move along in the healing process and say bye to the person for your own sanity.
  • vanityy99vanityy99 Member Posts: 2,254 Member Member Posts: 2,254 Member
    jessienani wrote: »
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    We been saying that.

    Asking for a break is the cruelest thing can one can ask for from another person. Here you are weeks, months later being hopeful, and waiting, wasting your time.

    My ex recommended a break and then hooked up with another dude.. Lol I am no fan of breaks :(

    I’ve seen it happen so many times the person is usually interested and getting to know someone else.
  • MaltedTeaMaltedTea Member, Premium Posts: 4,799 Member Member, Premium Posts: 4,799 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    Just want to clarify the timeline here...

    She wants to get back together just before Valentine's Day?

    Also, are you the same guy who went to church a few weeks ago and she avoided you the entire service?

    She's not fit for you, my friend.
  • eatpolerepeateatpolerepeat Member Posts: 22,601 Member Member Posts: 22,601 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    It's unfair but it's mostly what "a break" means :/
  • ReenieHJReenieHJ Member Posts: 6,035 Member Member Posts: 6,035 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Is it a normal thing now for girls to tell their boyfriend they want a break or space for a while (1 month or longer) to think about things or do they really want to break up but just can't say it? My situation :/

    Is this the person you saw outside of a church and they ignored you Or was that something I read in a book(I'm being serious here cause I'm really not sure)? But if it is then I'd try to move forward and get on with your life. You deserve to it instead of waiting in limbo. IMO, anyone who says 'I need space' is trying to take the easy comfortable(for them) way out. Don't invest any more of your one life in this person.

    ETA: Ah, ok, I see Malted Tea remembers the same post that I did so definitely let her go and go forward.
    edited January 14
  • jruch23jruch23 Member Posts: 972 Member Member Posts: 972 Member
    Yep, same guy. Last we talked was Jan 5th through text. She didn't even want to meet up in person. I was ready to call it quits. She says the break is needed but not sure if or when the break will end. It sucks. I fell hard for her. But contemplating trying to meet up tomorrow.
  • eatpolerepeateatpolerepeat Member Posts: 22,601 Member Member Posts: 22,601 Member
    jruch23 wrote: »
    Yep, same guy. Last we talked was Jan 5th through text. She didn't even want to meet up in person. I was ready to call it quits. She says the break is needed but not sure if or when the break will end. It sucks. I fell hard for her. But contemplating trying to meet up tomorrow.

    Think she said it all right there. I'm sorry this is happening to you

  • happimess01happimess01 Member Posts: 7,190 Member Member Posts: 7,190 Member
    if she keeps licking her ring pop on our first date
  • ReenieHJReenieHJ Member Posts: 6,035 Member Member Posts: 6,035 Member
    if she keeps licking her ring pop on our first date

    You sure you put this in the right topic?
  • slessofmeslessofme Member Posts: 7,256 Member Member Posts: 7,256 Member
    In an app profile:

    "I'm an open book"

    If he fills an app generated question about weird attractions with "redheads".
  • happimess01happimess01 Member Posts: 7,190 Member Member Posts: 7,190 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    if she keeps licking her ring pop on our first date

    You sure you put this in the right topic?

    I try not to be predictable. What's the fun in that?
  • HerNameIsMischiefHerNameIsMischief Member Posts: 158 Member Member Posts: 158 Member
    How would you feel about dating someone who had no prior long-term dating experience? Do you try to find out about the guy's past dating experience beyond if he's married and has kids?
  • will_it_go_round_in_circleswill_it_go_round_in_circles Member Posts: 932 Member Member Posts: 932 Member
    How would you feel about dating someone who had no prior long-term dating experience? Do you try to find out about the guy's past dating experience beyond if he's married and has kids?

    I think it's all a matter of perspective

    You could say no experience

    Or

    You could shine a little light on that and say no bad relationship habits. Yet.

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