"Don't lose any more weight!"

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Replies

  • fatchancemom
    fatchancemom Posts: 3 Member
    I think when people say this it's truly how they feel. I hope their terrified that I'll lose another 15, that means they think I can, which is better than I can muster! Lol! Lately I've just been saying "oh gosh, do you think I can? I was really starting to lose hope after this last plateau." Ha! I can't wait until the weather warms up and I can be seen as a skeletal remain speed walking down Main Street. :-D
  • beachgirl172723
    beachgirl172723 Posts: 151 Member
    Bump
  • msnucerity
    msnucerity Posts: 333 Member
    I had someone say to that me (I honestly think they thought they were saying something nice) so I sweetly replied with, "I'll stop trying to be a better, healthier athlete if you stop trying to quit smoking"
  • Christinat1979
    Christinat1979 Posts: 4
    I got that comment a lot after losing 105 lbs. It's a huge change. I was only 158 at that time, and was planning on losing another 10, but then decided I didn't want to look gross. :(

    So, with eating what ever I wanted & drinking lots of Whiskey, I gained back 35 lbs!!!! WHAT!!!!!!
    This time, I'm going to lose that plus whatever I want no matter how "sickly" everyone else thinks I look.
  • msnucerity
    msnucerity Posts: 333 Member
    I got that comment a lot after losing 105 lbs. It's a huge change. I was only 158 at that time, and was planning on losing another 10, but then decided I didn't want to look gross. :(

    So, with eating what ever I wanted & drinking lots of Whiskey, I gained back 35 lbs!!!! WHAT!!!!!!
    This time, I'm going to lose that plus whatever I want no matter how "sickly" everyone else thinks I look.

    You go girl!!! If anyone tells you to stop, tell them to put some weight on so a panel of judges can compare and decide which is healthier- them or you :)
  • GothicaAdore
    GothicaAdore Posts: 82 Member
    I am told this by my friends and family. That's how I know they care. Anyone who tells me how great I look because I've lost weight is scum. I'm opposed to the promotion of weight loss as equivalent to beauty.
  • CipherZero
    CipherZero Posts: 1,418 Member
    I'm opposed to the promotion of weight loss as equivalent to beauty.

    Having been a fatass, being overweight isn't beautiful. Normal weight - in a nation where overweight and obesity is rapidly becoming the norm - is de facto less ugly.
  • SkimFlatWhite68
    SkimFlatWhite68 Posts: 1,254 Member
    I'm pretty sick of hearing this as well, but I usually respond with a comment about how I'm at my goal weight now and that tends to stop the conversation going further. But yes, I agree - I don't tell people that they need to LOSE weight, not really sure why others need to comment on mine, or think it's ok to do so in the first place.

    I also agree with the other comment - sometimes it's a way of saying "wow, you look great". Just take it as a compliment and then keep doing your own thing.

    This week I've had a few friends tell me that my pants are baggy, and been on the receiving end of a bit of "fit shaming" but I usually just think it's because they have their own issues, it's not really about me at all.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    I never welcome unsolicited opinions about my body... I usually say "My body... My rules"

    Good response. Especially when the unwelcome comment about how I'm too thin comes from someone whp os 5'0" and weighs 199 pounds. ;-)
  • GenZombie
    GenZombie Posts: 117 Member
    :flowerforyou: Yes! I HATE hearing that. Especially from family members who used to (not so) subtly hint that I was overweight are now saying this to me! Makes me feel like I can't win with some people so I choose to ignore it. Best to work on being happy with myself instead :smile:
  • flow2512
    flow2512 Posts: 74 Member
    Why do people think its okay to say this? People would never have turned and said to me "please don't gain any more weight" but the number of friends, family members and patients that say "please dont lose any more weight" to me is astonishing! I'm not even skinny!! I'm a nice healthy 142-145 at 5'4 and at the top end of a 'healthy BMI'. I dunno.....it just annoys me! Anybody else encountering this or criticisms for losing?!

    I have had the same thing said to me regularly - I'm 51, 5 ft 5" tall and weighed 215 lbs at the start, when I got to 150 lb - which was the top end of what I should weigh, friends and especially my husband kept telling me that I looked fine, and I stopped, but was never really happy, I maintained the weight for a few months, then I re started and have lost an other stone and I now weigh 136 lb and I feel nice and slim, I would still like to lose another 5 lbs for my benefit and I will without telling anyone until I have lost it, then they won't moan at me.

    You carry on until you feel good.
  • pawoodhull
    pawoodhull Posts: 1,759 Member
    I get this occasionally too and I weigh 226 with 66 pounds to go to goal. Yes my face is very much thinner than when I started this at 386, but I'm only down to an 18 or XL and like I said I still have 66 pounds to goal. I'm sure they mean well and yes you can tell me I am looking good, but please don't insult me by saying that I need to stop losing or you can't see where any more weight would come from! I mean really!
  • vanillacoffee
    vanillacoffee Posts: 1,024 Member
    I'm mid way to my goal & when I was at my lowest point (probably 10 pounds less than now) I got that a lot, like "that's good! You should really consider stopping." Who are you to say? Ugh, it would drive me crazy! I have learned never to say it to anyone.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    Why do people think its okay to say this? People would never have turned and said to me "please don't gain any more weight" but the number of friends, family members and patients that say "please dont lose any more weight" to me is astonishing! I'm not even skinny!! I'm a nice healthy 142-145 at 5'4 and at the top end of a 'healthy BMI'. I dunno.....it just annoys me! Anybody else encountering this or criticisms for losing?!
    I've heard this as well, and I ignore the comments. It's their stuff, not mine.
  • balanceandnirvana
    balanceandnirvana Posts: 51 Member
    it annoys me so much. Even though I've gotten to a healthy weight, my weight fluctuates every day but i still maintain a good, healthy weight, my step-dad tells me i'm "wasting away" and no i'm not i've had the same weight for maybe 6 months! People who tell me I'm too skinny and whatnot are always pretty overweight. I have never once had a person who is fit and healthy tell me that I'm too skinny (excluding the time that I actually was underweight for a while). So really I think it's just their way of coping with their weight. They don't want to be overweight so people smaller than them are "too skinny" instead of them ones with too much fat. If everyone were fat, they wouldn't be. Not shaming anybody but this is what I have experienced because some of them later admit to me that they want to lose weight but most of them don't want to put the effort into it. Plus it isn't their body to judge and i wish people would not tell me I'm too skinny. I don't tell people they're too muscular or too fat!
  • mjtackett2006
    mjtackett2006 Posts: 6 Member
    I've had several people tell me this including a doctor. But my situation is a bit different than most. A few months after I had my thyroid removed, I lost my appetite. So much so that I have a daily reminder on my phone to make lunch for my kids. At first I wasn't losing any weight. Then I stopped drinking sweet tea all day. I dropped ~8 lbs in less than a week. I started counting calories and the weight loss slowed.

    My biggest obstacle was the method of calorie recording. I used to wait until the end of the day. Several days I would add it all up and be under 1000 calories. At 8 pm, there is not enough time to alter my total that much. Then I found the MFP app for my smart phone. It has helped immensely. I can calculate on the fly and include exercise so I know when I should eat more. On days when I am short, I drink a nutritional shake to add calories and nutrients.

    I have transitioned from hovering at 205 to hovering at 165. At 5'7", this is the high end of my "ideal" target area. I still get rude comments about losing too much, but I ignore them. I have it under control.
  • cppeace
    cppeace Posts: 764 Member
    People started telling me to not lose much and or anymore when I was still weighing 220ish. My collar bones begin sticking out at around 230, so no one believed I still had much to lose. They'd say I was going to blow away when I said I still had 70 to lose.
  • pleasepleaseno
    pleasepleaseno Posts: 166 Member
    My mom said this to me...i'm like 1 pound away from the healthy bmi range. I kinda exploded and got mad when she said this. I know she didnt mean it to be mean but intention is not always executed well :/
  • Tedebearduff
    Tedebearduff Posts: 1,155 Member
    Why do people think its okay to say this? People would never have turned and said to me "please don't gain any more weight" but the number of friends, family members and patients that say "please dont lose any more weight" to me is astonishing! I'm not even skinny!! I'm a nice healthy 142-145 at 5'4 and at the top end of a 'healthy BMI'. I dunno.....it just annoys me! Anybody else encountering this or criticisms for losing?!

    I really think they feel as if it is a complement.

    After losing the weight the next hardest thing is grasping your size, I went from 355lbs to 182lbs in just over a year (14 months &172lbs lost).. these comments really ****ed with my head... getting called skinny blah blah blah... I never wanted to be skinny just healthy. Eventually I felt as if I was too small... so I started to bulk.

    When I went back to around 220lbs I got comments (this was 2 months ago or so now) that I was looking allot better, more of a better weight for me. Which bothers me cause frankly why do these people comment on how I look... it's none of their ****ing business... it's also super rude... so tired of it! I don't like this weight on me either right now (up to 230lbs) and I'm at the boarder line of having to go up to a size 36 waist which I refuse to do!

    I've had other comments asking if I am on "supplements" for my muscle gains which is kind of a compliment but then it takes away from my close to a year of hard work trying to add muscle to my body ...

    FYI all these comments happen in my office... a few from family but for the most part it is ppl in my office.
  • anabarbarosie
    anabarbarosie Posts: 19 Member
    I receive this remark ALL the time (maybe because I'm 148 cm/4'10'' and the number on the scale is too low for their perception, which is ~45 kg/99 lbs). But that doesn't mean I'm too thin or anorexic, for God's sake. Just look at me, not at the numbers. I am healthy! :grumble:
  • ge105
    ge105 Posts: 268 Member
    That's pretty mild really. My grandma tells me my SO is going to leave me if I lose any more cause I already don't have curves anymore. Yeah it's kind of annoying just like the comments about being too fat to find a guy in the first place were but I just try and laugh it off, what else can you do?
  • Aemely
    Aemely Posts: 694 Member
    Answer: Thank you for the awesome compliment! Feel free to join me jogging anytime! :happy:
  • RHachicho
    RHachicho Posts: 1,115 Member
    Well honestly this depends from person to person. And bmi is a very poor yardstick for obesity. Honestly we only really use it because a better standard doesn't exist.

    Honestly I think in your case it's over reacting. People don't like it when you change, even for the better. But if I saw someone who was on the path to anorexia you would bet your *kitten* id tell them to go eat something.
  • LINIA
    LINIA Posts: 1,159 Member
    (C & P )
    This is the best answer/reason:

    "People with normal BMIs are abnormal in today's society. It's almost unusual to see someone who is a healthy weight"


    I've heard this is a cultural issue (in the US) because we are so used to seeing people overweight. Someone at a normal, healthy weight may appear as "too skinny" to others.
  • RHachicho
    RHachicho Posts: 1,115 Member
    (C & P )
    This is the best answer/reason:

    "People with normal BMIs are abnormal in today's society. It's almost unusual to see someone who is a healthy weight"


    I've heard this is a cultural issue (in the US) because we are so used to seeing people overweight. Someone at a normal, healthy weight may appear as "too skinny" to others.

    Or perhaps media and celebrities have taught us an unrealistic standard of healthy weight? there is that too.
  • meganjcallaghan
    meganjcallaghan Posts: 949 Member
    i have a friend who emails me asking for advice on how to lose weight, but then calls me anorexic every time she sees me.
  • CassieReannan
    CassieReannan Posts: 1,479 Member
    Yep, I get that comment all the time even before my goal weight. It's pretty annoying. There have been a few people question that I have an eating disorder because I pick healthier options and go out of my way to live healthier than them.
  • 70chevellegsp
    70chevellegsp Posts: 50 Member
    I've been getting the comment pretty frequently and I really don't care. I just say 'thanks!', 'ok' or my favorite is a sarcastic "DONE!, I won't lose another pound now that we've talked!". The only person that would concern me with that comment would be my wife, because we've been at it together since January and have a good understanding of our path. Those comments to me are similar to me giving a rocket scientist advice :0 Anyway the one comment that concerns me (not bother), and I do address, is when people are concerned about my health. My nephew asked my daughter if I was sick and if everything was ok. Nice to know people care and I can understand. But in the end, it's my journey, I control it and it will end on my own terms. People will be people, don't let them get to you.

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