WLS support and inspirational information
Options
Replies
-
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for January 14, 2011
Say, "Weeee!"
How often do you truly have fun -- just surrender to a moment and let yourself experience child-like curiosity or playfulness? "Weeee Moments" are moments when you decide to let go of inhibition and be human, not in a self-destructive way, but in a pure-hearted way.
A "Weeee Moment" could be surprising an unsuspecting stranger with a smile; dropping an egg on the kitchen floor, because you want to see what happens; going for a walk in the rain; eating with your fingers; going bungee jumping. It's a moment when you give up your negativity, distrust, skepticism, and self loathing. "Weeee Moments" are FREE moments.
Action for the day: Surrender to a "Weeee Moment" today, even if you just wear funny socks or spend the day daring your friends or coworkers to make you laugh out loud.
© 2009, Katie Jay. All rights reserved.0 -
Let's have a roll call. How many people on this site have had WLS?
:drinker: Me! (Those are protein drinks, of course.)
Me!
Meeee! I had VSG on 9/15/10.0 -
Sorry I've been gone so long and haven't posted in a while. After getting over a rough stomach virus (which was a very odd experience post-VGS), I found myself swamped at work and trying to "dig out." I missed my monthly support group meeting which made me so sad! I really rely on those meetings to keep me focused with a positive attitude. I thought generally the boards here would help in that regard too. In light of the "bug" and the extra hours at work, my exercise has waned considerably. I'm planning a trip to the gym tonight to get my butt back in gear! Wish me luck!
Also, I'm currently looking for someone who is willing to be sort of an accountability partner. Someone who would be willing to check in on me frequently (several times a week) to see if I'm doing what I'm supposed to regarding food intake and getting in exercise. I would be willing to do the same. If you're interested, please send me a message. Thanks!0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for January 15, 2011
Stay on the elevator.
The journey of recovery and mastery with weight loss surgery is not a quick ride to the top. It's a process that requires you to go ever higher. Sometimes people have the illusion that because their weight has come off, they are done -- that they have achieved all there is to achieve.
Keep going. The weight loss is merely a foundation; it is the ground floor in a journey to great and unimaginable heights.
Action for the day: This is not the floor on which to stay, you can go higher today.
© 2009, Katie Jay. All rights reserved.0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for January 17, 2011
Katie Jay, MSW
Redefine yourself.
One of the keys to long-term success is to change the way you view yourself. If you are a "fat person" who has lost weight, your subconscious is likely to work on regaining your "fat person" status.
If you are a "health-conscious, energetic person" your subconscious will strive for that state. It's not just semantics. It's the truth. Redefining yourself, and believing your new definition takes time and effort. But this process is critical to your success.
Action for the day: In your journal, write for five minutes on who you are. Try to uncover some of the negative views you have, such as "I am worthless," or "I'm too set in my ways to change," or "I'm too busy to live the WLS lifestyle." Once you've identified your old definition, spend five minutes writing a new one. Start living according to your new definition.
© 2009, Katie Jay. All rights reserved. To attend Katie Jay's next retreat, It's Time to Fall in Love with Yourself, visit and click on "Retreats and Events." This one-of-a-kind event will take place in Dana Point, CA, on the oceanfront.www.nawls.com0 -
Wow - who has been lurking in my head!
I actually recently journaled about this. Wondering if I could ever really view myself as anything but "fat". I am a smart fat woman. I am a overweight good mother. But every definition in my head includes some version of fat. I wondered why I can't just be a woman - no defining words. Just be a woman. This really helps explain to me what is going on in my head and that I have to change the thinking.
For me changing the thinking has been so much more difficult than the surgery itself.0 -
I'm personally really bad about negative self talk. I beat myself up when I am not consistent with my idea of success in working toward my goals. Predominantly, I think it's more about not letting myself make excuses for not exercising or for eating something that I know is not the best choice. I had a great day yesterday: I ate right, exercised, logged all my food and exercise for the first time in months and I felt good about myself. Then, I ate a small piece of cake. WTH??? :noway: How did I let that happen? I've got a problem and I need to address it. I sabotaged myself and I'm angry about it. So, I guess it's clear -- I'm addicted to food. Why? How do I fix that? :sad:0
-
Working on years of negative self talk and body images takes a lot of hard work to over come. I agree Trudy, sometimes these issues are definetely harder than losing weight, the surgery, eating, etc. Positive mental development is no easy chore and fight food addictions is a mind game also.
The surgery does not fix our heads.
Angel, The piece of cake is just that. One small piece of cake is nothing. Remember the all or nothing thinking is a mistake. Perfection at this is impossible because we are all imperfect. So again I churp, consistency is key, not perfection.0 -
True -- I will try to focus on consistency and not perfection. Thanks Mollie!
(I am a Virgo though LOL)0 -
I read an article on this that said that successful dieters don't beat themselves up that much -- that guilt makes us fat!
I do think sometimes we think that if we cry "mea culpa" in public (or even just in our head) that it will somehow make us more accountable or make us change. It probably even works for some people. But I think for most people, it's part of a negative spiral and doesn't work in the long run.
The way I look at is:
Food is fuel -- it's not inherently good or bad. Even so-called healthy food is unhealthy if that's all you eat -- we can't live on grapes alone, for example. Most of us can lose and keep our weight off if we make good choices 80-90% of the time. Not even 100%. So I don't even have a goal to not eat cake (or pie or whatever). Therefore, when I eat cake, I haven't "fallen off the wagon" or "cheated" or anything like that. I've just ... eaten cake.
Now, it's not a great choice so that means I need to be sure to adjust. If eating the cake was part of my plan, I've already adjusted. If it's not a planned thing, then I have to adjust after the fact. That could be not eating something else later that day, doing more exercise or eating more protein the next day. Or it could be nothing. Sometimes I can eat cake and not go over my calories or under my protein. (The two things I care about.)
The other thing is: it's just cake. Sometimes people go on about how horrible they are for eating something and, if you didn't know what they had done (eat cake) you would think they had done something really horrible like cheated on their SO or hurt their child or stole something. The self-flagellation is all out of proportion to the offense. (I'm not talking about your post, Angel. I'm talking about posts that involve a lot of self-loathing. I actually find them distressing there is so much self-loathing.)
Finally, sometimes it's more than just cake. It's part of continued sabotage and cake leads to cookies which leads to candy which leads to a solid period of time of pushing the limits and not adjusting for bad eating and not limiting poor choices to 10-20%. But, again, the damage may be greater but it's still just food. We still haven't beat our kids, cheated on our spouse or stole something. When I do this -- and I've done it and will do it again -- I pick myself up and renew my focus and just make better choices from that point on.
I also analyze. I am VERY analytical! :laugh: I want to know what happened and why and figure out what I will do differently again. But analyzing is way different than being mean to myself. It's more matter-of-fact; less loaded with emotion and definitely no self-loathing! If I don't love myself, how can I expect anyone else to love me?!
Anyway, that's just my take on it.0 -
Thank you for that post -- I've screen printed it and put it on my fridge! I'll need to read it a few times over and marinate on it. I really am grateful that I found this site! Thanks everyone for your contributions!0
-
I'm personally really bad about negative self talk. I beat myself up when I am not consistent with my idea of success in working toward my goals. Predominantly, I think it's more about not letting myself make excuses for not exercising or for eating something that I know is not the best choice. I had a great day yesterday: I ate right, exercised, logged all my food and exercise for the first time in months and I felt good about myself. Then, I ate a small piece of cake. WTH??? :noway: How did I let that happen? I've got a problem and I need to address it. I sabotaged myself and I'm angry about it. So, I guess it's clear -- I'm addicted to food. Why? How do I fix that? :sad:
you cannot beat yourself up over a piece of cake. The way I look at it is this: I am a binge eater. I know this. When I used to "diet" I would deprive myself of things like cake, chips, ice cream... When I did that, I would then get these urges or cravings for those things but still try to not eat them. So, I would binge on the "good" stuff until I was literally in pain from eating too much. I found that if I just allow myself to have that once in a while, I wouldn't binge like that.
I get frustrated at people that say "I can't believe you're eating that after having surgery!" Surgery was not my cure-all. It has only helped me to remember that I need to eat a lot less than I used to. I still have to work on all the head games I have going on. I do eat better because of the knowledge that I now need certain things because of the surgery, like protein, and I need to get that in first. But I will still always want that piece of cake.
Good luck, and quit being so hard on yourself!0 -
I'm personally really bad about negative self talk. I beat myself up when I am not consistent with my idea of success in working toward my goals. Predominantly, I think it's more about not letting myself make excuses for not exercising or for eating something that I know is not the best choice. I had a great day yesterday: I ate right, exercised, logged all my food and exercise for the first time in months and I felt good about myself. Then, I ate a small piece of cake. WTH??? :noway: How did I let that happen? I've got a problem and I need to address it. I sabotaged myself and I'm angry about it. So, I guess it's clear -- I'm addicted to food. Why? How do I fix that? :sad:
you cannot beat yourself up over a piece of cake. The way I look at it is this: I am a binge eater. I know this. When I used to "diet" I would deprive myself of things like cake, chips, ice cream... When I did that, I would then get these urges or cravings for those things but still try to not eat them. So, I would binge on the "good" stuff until I was literally in pain from eating too much. I found that if I just allow myself to have that once in a while, I wouldn't binge like that.
I get frustrated at people that say "I can't believe you're eating that after having surgery!" Surgery was not my cure-all. It has only helped me to remember that I need to eat a lot less than I used to. I still have to work on all the head games I have going on. I do eat better because of the knowledge that I now need certain things because of the surgery, like protein, and I need to get that in first. But I will still always want that piece of cake.
Good luck, and quit being so hard on yourself!
I agree that surgery certainly didn't fix the head games and if it was only one piece of cake, maybe it wouldn't be that big of a deal, but I've found myself eating stuff I normally am not even interested in because I was so strict about my food habits for about 3 months. The last month I've found myself eating things I don't really want that are bad for me. I've got to get the self-sabotage in check. I'm going to try coming here more, logging my food/exercise routinely and getting support from an accountability partner(s). Hopefully, I will be able to keep a clear head and stay focused -- maybe even keep the negative self-talk down.
0 -
Thanks for the chat on negative talk everyone! Awesome stuff!!
I am getting their MacMadame! It is taking longer than I thought but I am surely not stressing when I make poor decisions. Like today I at one item that I really knew better than to even buy it and I did. Why I brought it is the question I ask myself but I did not and it is what it is. So now I know I still have an issue with it and next time I will do better at buying just one serving. I am going to do a workout to make up for the poor choice and go to bed and workout again in the morning and see if I can still have a decent weigh in Saturday!
I have already figured out how many calories I need to burn tonight. I probably will not get that number but something is better than nothing at all.....:-)
Happy hump day everyone!0 -
Working on years of negative self talk and body images takes a lot of hard work to over come. I agree Trudy, sometimes these issues are definetely harder than losing weight, the surgery, eating, etc. Positive mental development is no easy chore and fight food addictions is a mind game also.
The surgery does not fix our heads.
Angel, The piece of cake is just that. One small piece of cake is nothing. Remember the all or nothing thinking is a mistake. Perfection at this is impossible because we are all imperfect. So again I churp, consistency is key, not perfection.
I like what you said, "consistency is key, not perfection." I'm so glad I have a new attitude about what I eat and taking ownership for my own actions. I too am worried about what I will see when I look in the mirror at the end of my weight loss. I've always thought of myself as fat and that's what I used to see. Right now though, I see the weight loss and I'm happy with myself. I just don't want to ever go back to that way of thinking. 0 -
Me too. There seems to be this attitude that you can't have anything "bad" if you are on a diet (for people who didn't have surgery) or if you've had surgery. There are people in the bariatric community who really push that idea, too. They post things that imply that anyone who has cake will fail or is a failure and that THEY will never eat cake. They say things like "I didn't have this surgery to gain all my weight back" with the implication that anyone who eats cake will gain all their weight back. But it's just not true.I get frustrated at people that say "I can't believe you're eating that after having surgery!"
Everyone has to figure out what works for them but plenty of thin people eat cake. So it is possible. You just have to figure out what works for you. Maybe there will be times in our lives when we can't eat cake, any cake, at all because of what it leads to. But there will be other times when we have have a bit and nothing horrible happens because it's a conscious choice and we're willing to deal with the consequences of that choice. And sometimes we eat the cake and it does lead to other bad choices and then we have to pull ourselves up and start over.
It's definitely not easy! I know that when I was early out, I was very strict with myself. I wanted to be because I wanted to lose the weight fast. So I was okay with this most of the time. But at one point, I started dreaming that I dove into a chocolate cake and ate most of it by the fistfulls. The WHOLE cake, not just a piece. The weird thing is: it was a particular kind of cake the admins used to buy to celebrate birthdays and I didn't even like it! But I was dreaming about eating it and eating a lot of it.I agree that surgery certainly didn't fix the head games and if it was only one piece of cake, maybe it wouldn't be that big of a deal, but I've found myself eating stuff I normally am not even interested in because I was so strict about my food habits for about 3 months. The last month I've found myself eating things I don't really want that are bad for me.
So I thought about it a bit and I decided I was being too strict about carbs. So I asked dh to make red potatoes with dinner that night and I had two bites (That's all I could fit in.) I proceeded to eat the potato, 1-2 bites at a time, over the course of the week. And my cake dreams disappeared!
There has to be a balance but I also think that we have to have a mindset that deprivation of food is not bad. After all, we make ourselves do things all the time that we might not want to in the short term in order to get to our long term goals. We might stop going to Starbucks so much so we can save up for a vacation or we make ourselves go to work when we don't want to so we don't get fired. I try to have the same approach to food. It's okay to not have that cake or cookies or brownie now because right now it doesn't fit into my plans. That doesn't mean I won't have it eventually though. At some point, it will either make sense or it will be totally worth it.
I don't really have the answers... I went a little crazy over Christmas eating lots of junk and I wasn't happy about it. I did okay at Thanksgiving though. I am still trying to figure out what the difference was and why I was okay one time and not the other.0 -
So true that everyone is different and has to find out what works for them. Hence there are so many skinny people who can eat cake ... frustrating for those of us who can't though it is.
It could very well be that I've been so carb restricted that is causing these excessive cravings for sweets that I wouldn't normally care about. I am doing better this week about getting fruit in and even popcorn and I've noticed the cravings have been a lot better. My focus is going to be making sure I get a good amount of healthy carbs in to keep the sweet monster away. :bigsmile:0 -
Is anyone else having trouble with plateauing, constipation and fatigue?0
-
I get constipated when I don't drink enough water. I drink 64-80 oz. in the winter and 80-100 oz in the summer and that gets my pee to the right color and also keeps constipation at bay.
For fatigue, when I was early out, it was more of an issue. I figured I was still healing and not eating very much so I gave myself a break. Also, I have sleep issues and that was making me tired. I talk to my doctor about it and she gave me a prescription for a mild anti-depressant that has sleepiness as a side effect and told me to take it with melatonin. I resisted for a long time but finally I took it for 2 weeks and it really helped. I had to take it for another two weeks about 2 weeks later but now I almost never take it. I only take it if it takes me more than 45 min. to fall asleep. So maybe once a month.0 -
I really didn't have issues with stalls - I do know that the closer to the goal I got the slower the weight loss went and I obviously have struggled with regain.
Constipation was an issue. I drank benifiber to make sure I had enough fiber when I really couldn't eat enough to get in the right amount of fiber. It was a daily thing and that seemed to help me stay regular. Then when I could eat more regular - oatmeal and fruits and veggies help me stay regular.
Fatigue - honestly the best thing was to exercise regularly - that sounds odd - I know but it is what helped me most. It energized me and helped. When I didn't (and I don't know) I feel more fatigued. When I'm exercising regularly at a pretty good level I have more energy the rest of the day.
Good luck!0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392K Introduce Yourself
- 43.6K Getting Started
- 259.8K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.7K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 401 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.8K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.4K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 994 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.4K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions