Googling pictures of body builders, or what muscles look like

bojaantje3822

I have no idea where to post this and this seemed like the most inoffensive place but every few weeks I find myself googling pictures of body builders to see what muscles look like. I will focus on whatever muscle in my body is changing, get a good look at how it looks on body builders, then completely forget what muscles look like the moment I close the browser.

I have aphantasia but it's rarely bothered me before. I did totally fail anatomy tests in biology class in high school. The only muscles I remember are the glutes and even then I can't remember the shape and location of the non-maximus ones.

Just now I looked at my arms and there's a part sticking out right above the inside of my elbow that didn't used to be there, at least not this noticeably. I don't really see changes in the mirror (except for my face) and I look the same in pictures (to me) so aside from the scale and tape measure, I track most of my body changes with my fingers, by touching all the muscles, and by googling pictures of body builders to see if I'm actually touching muscles (though if I'm sore that also helps recognise it's muscle I'm touching).

Turns out they're my biceps. And what I thought were my biceps are my deltoids. Anyway, it's really weird for me to have my biceps visibly sticking out when I'm not flexing or even when I am flexing. I hadn't trained my arms since I quit swimming aged 16 until last september (nearly a decade) so I'm used to there being much less muscle and much more fat there.

I did get a shock when I wore a tanktop for my casual online work meeting earlier and I thought I looked like a mechanic with my shoulders being so broad. You know how mechanics in movies and shows are always portrayed as these hot people with plenty of arm muscles? I don't know why that was the first thing to come to mind but it was.

Basically, do you have any unexpected new habits since starting your weight loss, weight gain, fitness or body building journey? Preferably something equally out of character. Make me feel better about not remembering muscles.