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booper28
booper28 Posts: 3 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hello everyone.
I’m Caroline, I’m in a pickle. I lost my baby boy to sepsis in 2018 and I’ve struggled with motivation, health and weight ever since. I have 2 other children and I need to be healthy and strong. I have good knowledge around health and fitness but I’m looking for support and ideas and I also love supporting others. I don’t want to follow a restrictive diet, I want to put good food in my body and move well/get stronger. I would like to loose around 3 stone but for some reason feel scared or vulnerable with that as if something else awful could happen or i will look like the old me and I’m not that person now, I’m forever changed by child loss. I don’t fully understand the reasons why I’m struggling to even start but thought saying hello might be a first step. I would love to know how you’ve used Fitbit and this community and how it’s going if anyone is happy to share :)

Thank you :) x
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Replies

  • tinahalpin33
    tinahalpin33 Posts: 3 Member
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    Hi Caroline! I’m Tina from Dublin in Ireland. Your story touched my heart. I can’t imagine losing a child like that.
    I have 2 grown up lads ages 23 and 25. My 25 year old lives in Germany and distances himself from the whole family. His mental health is causing him to act this way.
    I want to be the best I can be. Mirrors in changing rooms are the worst. I need to lose the belly and back fat!! About 2.5 stones to lose that’s about 30 lbs.
    I’m used a calorie deficit calculator to find out how many calories to eat daily and logging my food.
    First weigh in at home on Friday morning.
    But
    Trying is better than doing nothing
  • xbowhunter
    xbowhunter Posts: 988 Member
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    Hi Caroline

    So very sorry for your loss.

    I am a father of 2 and can't even imagine losing a child. I would do anything for my kids including sacrificing my own life for them.

    I wish you all the best with your journey.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,166 Member
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    Hello, Caroline, and welcome to the MFP Community. I'm so sorry for your loss: I can't imagine the impact. It's a tribute to your strength of character that you're here and working on self-improvement to benefit yourself and your 2 children.

    Getting started is hard for almost everyone . . . and for those that don't have the hard start, there's often a hard patch past an initial motivational "honeymoon phase". I think that you can do this. Maybe a gradual on-ramp, some modest changes at first, would make it a little easier?

    Since you know about health and fitness, you know that extreme restrictive eating rules or punitively intense exercise not only aren't essential, they can be counterproductive (through fatigue, undernutrition, injury, deprivation-triggered bouts of over-eating, etc.).

    Many people do very well syncing their Fitbit to MFP, and simply starting to log food (just as one eats now). For me, starting logging instantly made me realize that some foods I was eating weren't worth their calorie "cost" once that price tag was explicit. Those were easy things to reduce (frequency or portions) or eliminate in order to reduce my calorie intake. Slow loss IMO is a good thing, giving a person an opportunity to learn and practice practical new habits that will not only provide that loss, but a pathway (of good habits) to staying at a healthy weight long term.

    I hope that looking like you once did wouldn't be a bad thing once you got there, but if that's truly a concern, I think there are other appearance measures you could take to visibly signal externally that you are a new and stronger woman internally. Even a new fitness focus could accomplish that, and we women have options for things like haircuts and such. Many of us do look different after loss than we did at similar weight in the past (not necessarily in a bad way!), in any case.

    I can understand and empathize with some concern and hesitation on your part, but your obvious core of inner strength is a big asset. Your steps toward improved health and fitness, toward a different but still productive and satisfying life after such tremendous trauma and loss, will be an amazing example of character and resilience for your two children. I'm cheering for your success, and feel sure that you have what it takes to make it happen.

    Best wishes!
  • booper28
    booper28 Posts: 3 Member
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    Thank you for your replies and AnnPT for your great advice and encouragement. Think i will start logging my intake today and trying to increase water intake as a gradual start with this. Thank you :)

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