WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR MARCH 2024
Replies
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Rita every conversation is different, and you have to weigh the consequences of correcting him vs the consequences of letting him believe nonsense, just like you are doing. It's so sad to have someone you love change like that. Our hearts go out to you.
Annie in Delaware6 -
Morning, all, I began this as dawn breaks in the Arkansas River Valley, birds already in full swing,
Like Kylia, lots of thunder and lightning last night, but no major damage nearby except some flooding and closed streets in the largest town near us. Apparently two deaths were caused closer to Ohio than Arkansas. The weather generated between Dallas and us and then swept northeast over us and toward her and Ginny. Glad she and Ginny are OK.
Kylia - Alcohol opens some best closed doors, I've found. You did the best thing you could have done and followed the advice my sister gave me, which was to just walk away. Go somewhere else, close a door, stop communicating. Until everyone's sober, all words are dangerous, and some of them nearly unforgivable. Unfortunately, arguments while driving don't allow that. His being on his best behavior tells me he understood that he had crossed a line.
Lanette - I'm sorry the foot is still giving you gyp. Most frustrating.
Ginny - Glad Kylia gave us the report that you're OK. Do you still have a house full?
Sue - Any movement on the eviction of your squatter?
Crystal in Ontario - Welcome, and an early happy birthday! Make sure to bookmark the page and keep coming back.
Annie - Woo-hoo for pants and exercise habits!
Rita - No apologies - that's why we're here.
No real plans for today, and pleased with that. Broke down and ordered a photo/document feed scanner last night. Been toying with it for some time - it will help me get all the photos digitized and all the files that need keeping digitized as well. Plus, I'll be able to send them or make them accessible to the kids for all the old photos I have of them, as well. The old flatbed scanner will work for things that can't run through a feed, but there aren't many. Still haven't been able to bring myself to clean up my computer files, but this might help get going on that, as well.
Home and garden stuff:Also ordered all the necessaries delivered to build a raised bed garden this year. We've toyed with it in years past, and Corey's figured out how he wants to do it - basically a horseshoe shape.
The shorter end of the horseshoe will be eight feet, and the longer legs will be 16-feet long boxes basically, two feet across, and two feet high, with an arched trellis of hog wire over them to support the tomatoes and cucumbers. Eventually, he plans to clad the outside of it in the stone that we've got everywhere around here. Probably very eventually, but dreams are a wonderful thing. Everything's ordered and on its way, will be delivered next week, to get things put up the following weekend.
Just sent him a YouTube video where they take chunks of trees to fill in the bottom of raised beds - it takes them years to break down, but pulls in the bugs and worms and such that soil needs to stay healthy. Makes sense to me.
Well, I've been trying to get this posted for nearly four hours, but took my good morning call from Corey. Then my sister called, and I had to talk her off of a metaphorical ledge with some research work she's doing that I don't pretend to understand. Just helping her with the wording so she doesn't say something awful in a Zoom meeting.
My daughter called while I was on the phone with my sis, but she'll call back. We're five hours difference again with our time change, so she'll probably call when she's on the way to school to drop off her daughter. If she's calling earlier, she's calling me to talk while she's doing her early morning walk.
Time to get going on my yoga (5th time this week, woot!), and if there's energy left, the elliptical. Too muddy to work outside.
Off to the races, kids,
Love y'all,
Lisa in AR
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Rita - No doubt your DH's miscommunication "skills" are very stressful for you, especially if he's giving wrong info to the campers. Please, please vent here all you want. We are here for you.
HUGS Kim is spot on, many of us have been or are going through similar. 
If anyone wants to weigh in here..... looking to get a back-up laptop this year. Either a basic model HP with very few bells and whistles or a "renewed" Apple Macbook of some vintage from Amazon. Prices on both are about the same, but the price on the HP can escalate with purchase of the Word/Excel office suite. Thinking of just taking this old HP offline and using just Word and Excel and storing photos.
Early stages. Plenty of YouTube videos about Mac's - I know nothing about them. Might not be worth the learning curve.
TIA.
Lanette
SW WA State3 -
Rita - So hard. I dread that more than anything. With the best will in the world, we have to know our own limitations and not feel guilty about looking after our own mental health. I am not a natural carer, so my good will might run out pretty soon. Also, some types of dementia are easier to handle than others. Some stay nice, others get ornery. One of my friends had the sweetest mother who suddenly developed the foulest mouth you've ever heard!
We are holding your hands. Can your AlAnon group help? And get in touch with a dementia group. Hard decisions down the line. The more information you have, the better.
John has just left to pick up Edie.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx5 -
Lisa thank you! And Yay for yoga!
Annie in Delaware2 -
Kim ... family can be so dysfunctional. Hugs
Allie ... for decades I sent gifts to my two nieces that we no longer saw due to a very nasty divorce situation. Never heard a reply. Never even knew if they got the gifts. I reached out every year. Christmas. Easter. Valentine's Day. Birthdays. Nothing. And I almost stopped. My husband asked me why I was sending gifts. Was it to receive acknowledgement or to show them they were thought of and loved. So I kept sending the gifts. And then, one year, one of the girls ... then in her 20s ... reached out! She's shared a lot since then and I feel blessed that we now have a relationship! Choosing love is never wrong.
Beth
Agreed!1 -
Hi all,
Had minor setback...or maybe more of a challenge. My dad broke his arm and he lives an hour away and I had to spend a bunch of time while he was in the hospital commuting and now that he is in rehab I stayed at his apartment a few days. Mostly realizing that he needs more help foisted on him than he acknowledges. The apartment he lives in has services he can bring on to help him as he returns home. I just have to figure out what he needs.
But that said, I was out of my routine for the better part of two weeks and I'm only hoping he can get settled in after rehab. Getting myself back to my plan is feeling important since we both need to be in good order to work through the next few months.
Staying healthy without life interrupting feels like playing frogger sometimes.
The nice weather might settle in more firmly. I am crossing my fingers for no more snow.
-Anna from Michigan7 -
Nothing much going on these days. Quiet life. Husband did take me out for lunch to a restaurant we had not visited. It was called Krakens Cove so photos of octopi everywhere. I had fish and chips and husband had a steak sandwich. The owner served and took care of us. He was a nice guy and we congratulated him on his new business. Noticed the wife sat us down and gave us our menus but that's it. There were a fair amount of people at the restaurant which was encouraging. Thinking this is more his business than hers. We gave him a good tip because he was very personable and we want to see him thrive. Its not often you have a good restaurant serving beef and seafood items and both be yummy. They have a Sunday brunch thing and I noticed an eggs Benedict with shrimp that looked good.
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa4 -
Lanette, As a long time PC user, I have no desire to climb the learning curve of a Mac computer. Jake got enchanted with the idea of a Mac and has had a huge challenge learning it. I am no help and I told him that before he bought it. From my point of view, it's important to know what you want your computer to do before you can decide what to buy. I've had my hp PC for many years and love it. It has a lot of memory and a CD drive. When I bought it, I declined having a cameral in it because I couldn't see why I would need it. Now I go to meetings on Zoom many times a week and had to buy an external camera which is annoying compared to having one in the computer. No matter how thorough you are, there's a good chance that you'll include something you don't need or not include something you need. I use my computer a lot both online and for documents and photos. I'm glad I put the money into it. Barbie in sunny NW WA 5 -
Started my morning in the dentist chair(well, after doing the morning chores, AKA cat care, and put two corned beef in the pressure cooker to take to mom's this evening).
Had to have a crown replaced because of a small cavity under it-the appointment was supposed to be one hour, ended up being an hour and forty five minutes. Took two doses of Novicane and then a dose of something else because it was still hurting a bit when he was drilling. The old crown didn't want to come off, took a lot of work to get it off. Go back in 3 weeks to get the permanent one put on. The new assistant is one of our subs at Zumba. Didn't recognize her with the mask on.
Heading out to walk the wetlands before picking up Ezie.
Need to get dishes done, and pack so I am ready to go to mom's as soon as Ezie leaves or soon after. Nice to have daylight for the whole drive now.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA5 -
Had a whole post ready and poof..4
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Lanette - I spent years working on Macs when I was in the newspaper biz, as they relied on them, and have always had PC home computers. I refused to go to iPhones and haven't been sorry at all on that note, and would not buy a Mac for home use. The learning curve can be steep, but the small things are the highest annoyances, in all honesty.
My Droid phone and my laptop work together beautifully, so my phone has all my computer bookmarks - I can type texts on my computer through an app called Phone Link, and use that quite often. It's how I get my phone images to use when I post them here, as well, just copy and paste from the program. I would not go back to Macs on a bet.
Regarding brand, I have chosen Lenovo laptops the last three buys. I've dropped them more than once without issue, and I like them. Their quality control is good, the cost is competitive with HPs, and I've never had an issue with one. I have had past issues with HPs (like a motherboard going out), and their reputation isn't sterling as far as customer support. If you get it through a reputable store, though, that's not usually an issue.
Regarding mattresses - We bought a cheap innerspring mattress and box spring and a 4" thick, comfortable foam pad to put on top of them. The combination of all three was significantly less than the expensive mattress sets, and we've been very happy with it. You can get the foams in a huge range of thickness and density. For the back bedroom, we ordered a foam mattress that we laid on a wire frame, no box spring is needed, and it's working just fine. Just saying it doesn't have to be the traditional route, there are a lot of options these days, and mattress stores have enormous markups.
I think I'll be a consumer advocate in my next career.
Yeah, that's the ticket! 😊🛍️
Made 20 minutes of yoga plus knee pushups, crunches, stretches, etc., and 15 minutes on the elliptical!
Later, y'all,
Love,
Lisa in AR
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Stat for the day-
Walk w/family- 2hrs 9min 7sec, 58elev, 2.91ap, 85ahr, 112mhr, 6.34mi= 681c
Strava app = 777c
3663662 -
change of plans:
well, no walk for me- went to leave and car won't start. It was fine when I went to the dentist and when dh went and got gas. I went to leave 10 min later and it won't start.
He is pissed- sure it is bad gas and will cost him $1000 to get it cleaned out.
He is dropping his friend off(they were to lunch when I text him), stopping at the mechanics then going to have the car towed over to the shop.
May wait until tomorrow morning to head to mom's.6 -
Mechanic had him try an additive in the gas but that didn't work so will be driving the old van up to mom's.
Of course, the warranty ran out on my car last month. When we purchased the car and warranty they talked him into buying a 4yr warranty(used car-two years old). We found out recently that the 4 yrs started when the car was new, not when we purchased it- Some shady stuff goes on at that place
Same place, when we took it in for something else, said we didn't have a warranty- One of their people had canceled the policy, pocketed the cash, and we had no idea until we tried to use it.
This dealer used to be really good, bought most of our cars from them. Not anymore
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Happy St Patty's day from my little leprechaun !!8 -
3673670
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Almost 6pm- Still waiting for the tow truck driver. Was supposed be here in 30min from the time dh called at 2:15. Everything is through an app- no way to talk to a real person.
Our mechanic is closing at 6( in 8 min). so when the guy gets here I will have to cancel and reschedule it for Tuesday morning.
I had to sit and wait for him because dh had to go to his mom's.
Will be dark before I get to mom's I guess. Oh well, I will just take it slow.
Have a wonderful weekend ladies.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA8 -
Rita Hugs for you too!
Thank you ladies for all of your support. Was crazy day at work. Sister in law in the middle of a diverticulitis flair up since yesterday. So it was just me dealing with customers. Craziness! I am now three days behind. BUT.....I got my water in today (okay tonight). Man, it has made a difference in my muscles and movement. I hurt all over earlier today!
I love my HP laptops. I refuse to buy any Apple products after issues with them and my ipod a LONG time ago. I still listen to the same music I put on in the early 2000's. Good thing it is good music! I too have heard that Mac's have a major learning curve.
Mattresses- We tried the Sleep number for a few years. We had a problem with it leaking down and I didn't like the two twin bladders to make the king. I was always sleeping on the foam spacer. About 8 years ago, we bought a rather expensive and firm mattress that you can flip and turn. It took about a year before I bought a 3" foam topper to put on it. It was too firm for my shoulders and hips. It is also too heavy to flip for the two of us anymore. We do rotate it about every 6 months. The foam topper made all the difference. When we bought our one for Kentucky it is a really nice pillow topper. I sleep well on it. It was a mid priced one. So, I reckon, I like firm with a soft top.
Oh, we signed a contract to have the garage built. Of course, found out today that the contractor's barn got hit during the storms last night! He is fine, but not sure about his equipment yet. Not too soon on the build though since a squirrel chewed the undercarriage of my Flex on Wednesday!
TIme for paperwork.
Much love,
Drink your water!
Keep on taking small bites so that we can get the elephant eaten!
Welcome to the new ladies!
Kylia in Ohio
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Debbie Hugs!1
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SophieRosieMom wrote: »Rita - No doubt your DH's miscommunication "skills" are very stressful for you, especially if he's giving wrong info to the campers. Please, please vent here all you want. We are here for you. HUGS Kim is spot on, many of us have been or are going through similar.
If anyone wants to weigh in here..... looking to get a back-up laptop this year. Either a basic model HP with very few bells and whistles or a "renewed" Apple Macbook of some vintage from Amazon. Prices on both are about the same, but the price on the HP can escalate with purchase of the Word/Excel office suite. Thinking of just taking this old HP offline and using just Word and Excel and storing photos.
Early stages. Plenty of YouTube videos about Mac's - I know nothing about them. Might not be worth the learning curve.
TIA.
Lanette
SW WA State
As a PC user for decades, I find Macs frustrating.
My husband and I went with Dells for our main laptops. As for MS Office, I went with the subscription to 365.
Machka in Oz
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The symphony was another stunning performance! Well worth attending. We've attended two symphonies this month and both have been amazing.
Machka in Oz
At the symphony last night:
Grieg Norsk, Op 53 No 1; Kulokk and Stabbelåten, Op 63 No 2
Grieg Piano Concerto in A minor, Op 16
Sibelius Symphony No 3 in C, Op 52
Sibelius Finlandia, Op 26
The last piece in the symphony yesterday was Sibelius' Finlandia. First time I have seen it played and it was amazing!
Machka in Oz3 -
Debbie - I used to use small plates, I need to get back to that habit again.
It really helped me, it helped with that “finish your plate” mentality we were all raised with. They have been encouraging parents not to say that the last few years.
Allie - I have been meaning to thank you for recommending the sling for plantar fasciitis. I bought two, the first one enclosed my toes and was quite uncomfortable, the second one was more expensive and looks like an odd contraption but was way more comfortable. I forgot to put it on night before last because my foot wasn’t hurting when I went to bed, in the morning I woke up and it hurt again, so it’s definitely doing its job.
That cat needs to get her days and nights straight lol
Annie - when I was at the manor, the dietitian told us not to restrict our seniors on food, they need to have what treats they can get in the little time they have left.
I have warned my family if they try to restrict me I will become their worst enemy. 😂
You are doing so well!
I have cleaned out mugs so many times over the years. They need it again, this time though it’s because of the ones I’ve made. 😂
Kylia - I hope this weekend is much better for you, that was a tough one last weekend.
Lanette - I started following a new person on FB that does a bunch of exercises. I will have to find her name and send it to you. I thought I saved her reels but I don’t know where they save to. 🥴
I am really enjoying my HP I bought to go to school. MS office came with my tuition, I’m going to have to pay for the subscription come July. I don’t know what that will cost. I don’t know if you can still buy a program installed or not.
For those with family members suffering from dementia, brain injuries, etc. hugs. My Mom has been in a nursing home since 2017, she had to go in earlier than was absolutely necessary because I was here and my brother and sister in law worked. Mom’s house was not set up for it to be safe for her.
Today I had to go help a friend’s mother who is in hospital, the daughter lives across the country. I texted my friend to let her know that I had dropped the stuff off for her mom with the nurses desk. I told her that the assisted living facility mentioned to me that her mom is moving out the end of the month. She said that she knew but it’s not a good situation, her mother gave two weeks notice without a place to go to, she has met a guy online and thinks he’ll save her and she’ll be at for life. My friend has been trying to avoid invoking the POA and has left it so long that her mother has now made herself homeless.
I don’t know what’s going to happen, but her mother’s room is jam packed, she’s in the hospital and the daughter is across the country. The Mom had a brain injury 40 years ago and probably should have had her right to make decisions away at least 5 years ago.
Lisa - you and I are on opposite ends with photos. I am actually working on printing mine out again. LOL
I want to be able to sit down and look through an album with my grandkids. I also want to write on the back so my girls know who people are.
I would like a raised garden bed, it hurts my back leaning over, I didn’t know about the wood, will that work for trees that have been cut for a bit? Also, will it attract carpenter ants? The bed I want is against the skirting on the trailer.
Debbie - what a pain, hope you can get it fixed with no big expense.
I’m so glad it’s Friday! The presentation today was as bad as yesterday. I have earned the certification though and that’s the main thing.
During the presentation today I managed to get all of the photos on SD cards and thumb drives I had handy put onto my computer in yearly folders. I left them on the drives, I just found this the easiest way to know what I have and what I may want to print.
I figure it will take some time so I can do one or two years at a time. Once I print I can delete off the computer.
I have most of my photos from 1987 to 2001 in albums now except some I am putting in different albums.
I should go have my bath.
Have a good night ladies
Tracey in Edmonton6 -
On Thurs did a Kathy smith DVD, did HIIT today and the plan for tomorrow is to do a yoga DVD.
There was supposed to be a launch Wed. but it was scrubbed until Thurs. Only that one was scrubbed to tonight. We shall see
Played cards Thurs night Why does it seem that I’m always so busy. The guy about the bathroom came and took measurements. We were supposed to take this one gal to the airport today, her flight kept getting pushed back, now it’s canceled. Well, we’ll be able to go to the pot luck and then play cards.
Barbara – Vince wouldn't watch exercise videos, he’s waiting for vitamin E to be developed. He’s someone who feels that if there’s something not right, take a pill. That’s one thing that we differ in. I believe in trying to heal yourself with food and exercise. At least at first. Admitted, there are some things that you must take a pill for (like osteoporosis) but I do believe that pt can do so much. From when he hurt his back last year, he hasn’t been doing his exercises pt gave him. Didn’t I tell you that’s what would happen. But I must say that ever since the time change, he has been walking around the parking lot
M – happy belated birthday
Annie – I, too, feel that the plate should be clean. One thing I do do many times is use a smaller plate. Oh, yes, Goodwill will take the mugs, etc
Allie – happy birthday to Carmine. And remember, the more they pull away, the harder they come back. Does she know about the twins yet? Smiles is getting SOO big
Heather – reading how you were limping broke my heart. How frustrating! You were always so very active, and you will be again one day. Bea looks so pretty in her outfit. Good choice
Joy – what kind of pierogi do you make? I only make the cheese since that’s all the family will eat. Me? I like the sauerkraut ones, too
Everyone in Ohio – prayers for the safety of you all
Crystal – welcome and happy birthday
After the pot luck played cards, saw the launch was really nice since they delayed it so that it was an evening launch.
Rita – hug
Walked on the elliptical this morning for an hour, my pedometer says I only took 2,000 steps. I know that isn’t right. It was probably placed in my pocket wrong
Debbie – that’s horrible the employee canceled your warranty. What are they doing about this?
Michele who used the timer on her phone this afternoon3 -
Today’s gratitude:pastel sky and sea. Calm, mild morning.
Yesterday: Brake light repair cost $6, part only no labor charged! Good company, lots of laughter and successful shopping. Yummy vegan lunch with leftovers. If you’re ever in North Bend, OR, stop at the Tin Thistle for the Hawaiian Teriyaki veggie burger. Watch out, those ‘bowls” (salad or rice) are deceptive, they have more in them than it seems. Get the small.
Ah Spring! Balmy 65F sweet smelling air, lovely stroll with D. Indulged in brown sugar boba, was like drinking a Milky Way candy bar. Oops.
Kim I loved your insights on love, with/without conditions and how to approach conversations about needed behavior changes. Would you be my godmother? ;}
Beth how insightful of your husband “…or to show them they are loved…” and you “choosing love is never wrong.”
Rita, you can believe it. Love you!
Heather ((hugs)) Hope there are more and better treatment options for the arthritis and stenosis that if the pain turned out to be vascular. ((hugs)) Loved the Bea’s birthday pics, especially the sox with the party dress, necklace and MaryJanes.
Joy congrats on taking off that pound. 16 dozen perogies? Wow!
Tracey you are going to be such a blessing to every child you serve.
Lisa hope the tornado warning never developed.3/14: Move mins- wii:0 PT:0 d:0 x&a:0 dogs:0 shopping:128 Jeopardy walking:41 Steps:8372Only through pg 36 but dinnertime…
Fuel: sugar in vs mfp=-13 CI<CO net=602 vits=0.5
Live: Joe, readings, BP, AF, ptT, ptS, Tower Ford, Natural Grocers, Coos Head Coop, Tin Thistle, Dragonfly Farms. Wt:131.2
Later, lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
March: Move more than yesterday, fuel better than yesterday, live NOW.
Open heart and mind before mouth.
2024: Strengthen: body, mind, heart-connections.
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grandmallie wrote: »Welp silly cat hopping up and down to wake me up to feed her wet food at 3:30 this morning the crazy girl..
I have one lone tree frog out there peeping.going to try and get back to sleep..
Glad to hear you are well with the wild weather..
We put out enough dry food for Rhody for the night and we do not get up until morning to feed him. Come about 7:30 am, he'll start making demands.
I was the same way with my previous cats.
Fortunately, they learned to sleep through the night, or play quietly, because it would take nothing short of an earthquake or fire alarm to get me up and doing something in the middle of the night.
Oh also ... one way not to lose your posts is to use the Save Draft option.
Another way is to post the post at some point when it is getting a bit long, and then edit it.
M in Oz2 -
Great Friday from gloomy NM. The last two days have been overcast, and I am not used to that any more. It has affected my mood and I just want to crawl back into bed! I need to go to PO and Walmart today so no bed for me.. Perhaps a nap later? I’ve been doing good on all my goals except my weight. I know it’s water weight as it goes up 5 pounds in a week and goes down the same 5 pounds in a week or maybe a little less. Depressing. I’ll be sure to mention it to my Renal doc the next appointment. I may try the recommended meds just to help with my weight, and blood pressure. Have the A1C down to 5.4 which is high normal, but blood pressure varies with weight fluctuations. Renal numbers are good, I think I fixed that! IDK, just yucky from the weather I think.
I have noticed a big change in DH’s memory of late. I’ve told you all before he has alcoholic dementia. It is begining to show more and more. He talks to me and gets all the details mixed up. I told him some fact recently, that he repeated to me that he found on ‘the Internet’ and changed some of it to make it a lot worse than it really was, and it was his idea. He had never done that before. That night he was really mixing a lot of stuff up. He used to box, and had gotten into a lot of fight when he was young to add to the alcohol, so I expected this. I don’t argue with him about the facts just acknowledge what he says. Problem is, he says stuff that is totally off the wall to campers that come in. They believe him because they don’t know any better. I get embarrassed about it if I hear him and can’t correct him in front of others b/c it causes an argument that embarrasses the people he talks to, so I just walk away knowing that I know the truth. He is 70 now, and I’m glad he lasted this long with his mind. Not sure how long I’ll be able to deal with this before I can’t anymore….
This stuff is affected my weight too. I know it..
RVRita who is sorry for the rant but needed to talk to someone.
I hear you, and I've been there.
My husband reads the news a lot ... spends hours reading the news. Some of it he gets right, some of it he misreads (that's part of his aphasia). A lot of it he applies to what's going on here ... only it's happening elsewhere in the world.He'll get upset that insurance prices are going up because of the flooding. Our insurance prices have only gone up a little bit, as they usually do, and "the flooding" is happening in Queensland and doesn't affect us.
He'll become highly critical of different people groups who he thinks are the reason for all the problems he reads about in the news. Young people (as in teenagers) and millennials are the problem. Although, it confused him greatly when I told him that millennials are now between 28 and 43 years, have families and are the people we deal with in business settings. People from the mainland are the problem ... and he has upset people we know when he starts in with that because a lot of people we know are from the mainland. People from other countries are the problem, and he becomes wildly racist at times. I'll usually stop him before he gets too carried away, and point out that I came from another country.
And more!! Every day there's something else to be up in arms about ... and his version is usually not what's actually happening in some way or another.
He has also been described as tangential and verbose which means that he'll start with one thing, then go off on one of his pet topics, heading toward his perseverating topics ... tangential - many tangents and hard to follow ... and will talk at length about it all ... verbose. It's very hard to get a word in edgewise.
It's exhausting to engage him in any sort of conversation ... and can be very embarrassing when he talks to other people because one of the things many people with brain injuries (from accidents, strokes, dementia, or whatever) seem to lose is tact and the ability to read the audience. Where we might think certain things, we know not to say them out loud. When we're talking to someone, we might notice certain body language that indicates the other person disagrees with us or feels uncomfortable with the conversation, so we'll pull back or change the subject. But many people whose brains have been damaged in some way don't have that ability.
I try to leap in and redirect the conversation to safer ground where possible. I've also warned various people not to take him too seriously. But he has offended a number of people to the point of being threatened by one or two who didn't know that he has a brain injury.
One of the things I try to do is to introduce him to a range of topics via TV, music, going out and doing things like attending the symphony, our Fencing, etc. so that perhaps he'll have something else to think about and talk about.
It's not easy and I'm sorry for those of you who are also going through these things.
M in Oz
7 -
My hearts go out to those of you with dementia afflicted husbands.
We had an arty time with Edie. Of course, she wasn't happy with what she produced on canvas, but I liked it. I chose to do a couple of easy birthday cards, and John did another drinks coaster. We need better lighting in there for painting at night.
She went up to bed around 9 pm , because she has cyclo-cross this morning. My son has just picked her up. Bea was in the car, worn out by her musical theatre performance in Eastbourne. Apparently, it was a professional production of 'Joseph....' with some of the old stars of the show. He had to pay!
The theatre school provided twenty kids, with four songs. Bea was in the front with the stars and was handed the mike at one point. 
For breakfast I decided to repeat the success of the smashed avocado on toast, with a fried egg on top. Just out of curiosity, I looked up the price at our local brunch place. Just avocado on toast, with a sun-cured tomato, was £14.50. An egg is £1.50 extra. So three breakfasts with apple juice for Edie and teas for us would be £60 . In dollars that is $76.39. Mind-boggling! Ours was absolutely fantastic.
Now to wash my hair and make myself beautiful for lunch at Petit Pois with an old friend,. John is coming too. It will be a limp and a stagger, but I can drug up. She will come back here afterwards for a bit.
Love you all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx5
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