Does anyone have a similar experience? Fear of Goal Weight

goff0020

I have a milestone but I keep avoiding it. I reached it once 25 years ago and then immediately stopped trying to lose weight. I reached it again two years ago and then immediately stopped trying to lose weight. When I see that first number change from a 2 to a 1, panic sets in.

It really concerns me that I have this mental block that makes me not want to reach my healthy weight. I am trying again this spring. 20 pounds to go until I reach the milestone, I am hoping that I am able to make it past the milestone this time.

Does anyone have the same issue and some ideas about conquering what looks like a fear of being healthy?