Do older guys care less about looks and weight?

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  • SweetLilyR
    SweetLilyR Posts: 283 Member
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    It's been my experience that it doesn't matter what age a man is. My boyfriend and husband both dated skinny women before me...and I am FAR from skinny. I've had to work to overcome that "he couldn't possibly like me when he's used to skinny chicks" mentality.

    Go for it and see what his reaction is. The worst that could happen is that he could say no. I'm betting it would be his loss. Life is too short to be afraid of the slight possibility of rejection. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. And I'm going to stop before I start spouting more cliches...I wish you the best of luck!
  • Jersey_Devil
    Jersey_Devil Posts: 4,142 Member
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    a guy thinks about sex every 7 seconds...that stat doesnt change with age. we care about looks whether we are 18, 69 or 95.
  • TheRealJigsaw
    TheRealJigsaw Posts: 295 Member
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    It's okay to be a little crazy, like fun crazy. But you just don't understand the level of crazy she is.

    He knew what she was like but still chose to marry her....what's that got to do with anything anyway?!

    She could have turned pyscho right after they got married
  • JulieGirl58
    JulieGirl58 Posts: 158 Member
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    Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
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    If you love yourself they will love you.

    Truth one: love yourself
    Truth two: Stop caring what you think he thinks
    Truth three: If he is not attracted to you, he will not call you
    Truth four: If he's calling he's attracted
    Truth five: Older men are more realistic and look more to the entire package, although looks are still important. (seriously women are the same... would YOU date a guy you didn't find attractive???)
    Truth five: I once asked a guy (who I dated for 4 years) why he approached me rather then the other skinnier "hotter" women in the bar that first day. He said it was because I was smiling and having fun and they weren't. (I was fat then)
  • Artemis_Acorn
    Artemis_Acorn Posts: 836 Member
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    I'm a 52 year-old happily married woman who has struggled with weight all my life. I have had more men flirt with me in the past 5 years than in all the preceding years together. (excepting my husband of course)

    As for the reasons, I couldn't say, except that perhaps it is because I'm more comfortable in my own skin than I ever was when I was young. Even though I'm not thin, I do try to take care of myself, and am often told that I don't look my age.
  • 42hockeymom
    42hockeymom Posts: 521 Member
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    Every man has standards.


    Some are lower than others.



    Some are.... much. Lower.

    So, clearing up, because this confused me. And the only way for me to know is to ask. There is no flaming involved in the inquiry.

    Are you saying that a man who prefers a woman who is overweight and/or obese have much lower standards than, say, a guy who prefers a woman who is at a "society acceptable" weight?

    Once again, only asking as to clear up, no attack or flaming of this poster in any way. Just asking to ask 'cuz I'm nosy like that
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Depends on the guy. Age does not always bring wisdom, but when my first (hot) wife dumped me, I did find looks mattered a little less to me. I also learned to appreciate a wider variety of body types. I don't know if I always would have seen past my current wife's physical imperfections if I had met her sooner, but to me she's the most beautiful woman around.
  • goldfinger88
    goldfinger88 Posts: 686 Member
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    Are you kidding? Old men think they're gods and they love thin and very young women. No, all men hate fat. Oh, I'm sure they are exceptions. But honey, I'll be 70 in a few months and I know a little about men. They think they can look pretty much any way and get any woman they want --- especially if they have a buck or two. But they want young chicks and skinny chicks. Truth be told, most of them are lucky to get a woman at all.
  • mlb567
    mlb567 Posts: 19 Member
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    Who says she is crazy... you or him?
    Ever heard her side of the story?
    I always laugh when women date guys who have such a "crazy ex wife"
    then four months later they break up because the guy was "such an *kitten*"
    hmmm... who is the crazy one now. Just sayin'
  • msaestein1
    msaestein1 Posts: 264 Member
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    Just want some opinions...In general, do you think men care less about what women look like and what their weight is as they get older?

    I think most men become realistic and less shallow about things as they get older. Physical attraction will always be a factor, for both men and women, but as we get older, I think we all stop the nit-picking. There are men I wouldn't have even considered when I was 21, but now I focus more on personality. As one poster said, I think you should make a move on him. The size 2 chick was bad news, I think he will realize that a good heart trumps thinness any day. Besides, it looks like you have lost a ton of weight (congrats!) and he knows, if your weight bothers him, that you are working on it.
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Plus, he's the shy type so I don't see him ever making a move...it's gonna have to be me.

    If he knows you're interested and he doesn't make a move, it's not because he's shy. You'd be surprised what a shy man can summon himself to do when motivated.

    I disagree. If a woman is attracted to a man, she should make a move. After all, usually one person or another is more motivated at first. If you always wait for the man to make a move, the ones who do will probably be more interested in you than you are in them. Bottom line, the initial interest is fairly irrelevant - the relationship develops, or it doesn't after two people get together.
  • goldfinger88
    goldfinger88 Posts: 686 Member
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    By the way, why do you care? You should want to look good and be fit for you. Not some damn man - old or young. Don't care what some man wants. Care what you want. Damn a man.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    No, all men hate fat.

    Nope, not true.
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
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    Are you kidding? Old men think they're gods and they love thin and very young women. No, all men hate fat. Oh, I'm sure they are exceptions. But honey, I'll be 70 in a few months and I know a little about men. They think they can look pretty much any way and get any woman they want --- especially if they have a buck or two. But they want young chicks and skinny chicks. Truth be told, most of them are lucky to get a woman at all.

    HA! yep! my ex.. thinks his **** don't stink! He told me i'd be miserable and alone the rest of my life and I should stay with him to avoid all that misery. LMAO . He has a lot of dates now but no girl will commit because all he's got is a nice fat bank account to hold their attention with for awhile. He's over weight, out of shape and off his rocker. Best player I've ever met though. Although he does date overweight women. He says they are "nicer". lol I just think they have less confidence and it takes longer for them to see through his charade.
  • jennyrebekka
    jennyrebekka Posts: 626 Member
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    of course each person is unique.....in their priorities when it comes to a potential partner - - but i think sometimes SOME older guys start getting insecure about THEMSELVES getting older - - and sometimes that comes out in the type of woman they choose. Those are not "good guys" anyway, though.

    You definitely need to work on your own self-esteem. THAT is attractive to everyone!
  • JewelsinBigD
    JewelsinBigD Posts: 661 Member
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    I don't think weight has anything to do with it - it is purely chemistry. I have NEVER been attracted to a guy who was not attracted to me. I might think someone is handsome or hot but if I am truly attracted to them (like OMG I must have) - they are also attracted to me whether I am a size 28 or a size 8 (been all of the above by the way several times).
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
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    By the way, why do you care? You should want to look good and be fit for you. Not some damn man - old or young. Don't care what some man wants. Care what you want. Damn a man.

    u-mad-bro-290x280.jpg
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
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    Are you kidding? Old men think they're gods and they love thin and very young women. No, all men hate fat. Oh, I'm sure they are exceptions. But honey, I'll be 70 in a few months and I know a little about men. They think they can look pretty much any way and get any woman they want --- especially if they have a buck or two. But they want young chicks and skinny chicks. Truth be told, most of them are lucky to get a woman at all.

    Bitter, party of one. Your table is ready.

    The ironic thing is that if a guy posted something like this that generalizes women with such a broad brush, we would get blasted. For the record, you're wrong. Most of us are extremely realistic about who we do and do not actually have a chance with. Those of us who like fit women generally like them because (A) we work our tails off to be fit as well and (B) we like someone who values their health and well-being as much as we do. But thanks for assuming the worst of our entire gender. :flowerforyou:
  • abelthephotographer
    abelthephotographer Posts: 127
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    As I've matured - we don't ALL stay boys our our entire lives ;) - I've come to realise what is more important to my long-term happiness.

    Having a hot partner doesn't make it anymore - of COURSE it did when I was young, but not now. And you want to feel physically attracted to someone, sure.

    But personally, at 43 I value intelligence and sense of humour, character and kindness. Aesthetics only after you've ticked those boxes ... :)

    Go for it - good luck!

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