I need help.

1246

Replies

  • Baba_Roxy
    Baba_Roxy Posts: 38 Member
    OP and other girl...ignore the haterz...you guyz do you

    This is a support site and WAY too much judgment in here. We all have to do whats right for us and make our relationships work.

    We are all here for the same reason

    Hey, as for support in her weight loss, I don't judge her whether she eats the cup cakes or throws them out. Whatever she chooses is obviously what worked for her. And if that sort of relationship works for her, great. But just like they defend their stance, i put my out there and defend it, because I feel respecting yourself goes hand in hand with weight loss, and it just didn't and doesn't seem like they do if they don't make their own choices or feel secure enough in their relationships to not worry about changing their appearances so they won't lose their significant others.
  • theopenforum
    theopenforum Posts: 280 Member
    well Id throw them away but this is what I usually do. If I decide to eat something unhealthy I make a pact with myself before. I say that if I want to eat let's say cookies that I will have to be willing to do the extra 30 mins of cardio ( on top of my usual 1hr of cardio) before my workout. If its something good enough that I am willing to eat, even though I know I will be adding 30 mins of cardio to my regimen then I go ahead and eat it. If not I move on. This way I am constantly challenging myself to get better and stronger. I guarantee you if you do this everytime more often than not, you will say no more than yes.

    Cheers

    Tof
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    What is wrong with being a pet? Some people are into that. Seems a bit judgmental.
  • Momwidomski
    Momwidomski Posts: 24 Member
    The children in Europe are starving! LOL, I heard that one growing up more than once.
    Let me say this about that. If you are having trouble for 10 days I would blame it on the sugar. Sugar begats more sugar.
    If you feel deprived, read recipes and find things that give you more variety, some crunch as well. Cupcakes freeze well if you can't bring yourself to toss them out. I like the Taste of Home website. I love one dish meals and crockpot meals. I used to hate veggies until I found delicious recipes on how to cook them. My mother boiled everything that was a veggie and I grew up hating them. Now i dredge them in olive oil, lemon, seasonings (rosemary, to die for) and bake them on a cookie sheet for 40 minutes or stew them with chicken broth and know what I have missed all my life.

    For myself, I stuck with 1200 calories the first two months. I cut out the white flour, white sugar and high fructose corn syrup found in so much of our foods. Truvia is a great sugar substitute, most like sugar in appearance and texture and taste. Splenda tears up my stomach so I have switched to this Truvia and no problem. About the third month I was getting bored with the routine, felt hungry too. Like my stomach was hitting my backbone, nausea, etc. I added in a hundred calories, allowed myself some changes, by learning what a "normal" serving of something is (start to read the boxes). Variety is a good thing after trying the regimented way of doing things the first couple of months. So try to set yourself a daily goal of caloric intake. Read some recipes that sound appealing to you so you will make something that is not only healthy, but tastes good. Do have your three meals a day and have snacks in between. You cannot succeed by starving yourself then going back to the way you used to eat. You need to give yourself time to settle into a new way of looking at food and realizing down the line that this is a lifestyle change and not a diet. Once you can do that (it may take a few months) you can add things back in once in awhile without feeling like you just "gave up" and begin each day anew. Because it is a new day of tracking what you eat, planning what you will eat in advance. You will go to restaurant to dinner, but you will have a salad at lunch knowing you will be eating more calories at dinner. Do not punish yourself as you are right now. It is not worth it!
  • CindaWhite
    CindaWhite Posts: 104 Member
    tumblr_maq610BpFq1qakrdzo6_250_zpsf86c5d8e.gif


    I do actually. My boyfriend asked me to lose another 15-20 pounds.

    Oh well, you know what you have to do then.

    C7RkWOT_zpsf2597949.gif






    Just kidding. JBU

    I don't know...cake and pie are kinda the same...
    AmericanPieOfficial-1.gif

    I gotta say this is the most entertaining post I have ever seen. I love it!

    As for you OP I was hoping this was not a serious question but since you are apparently sincere... Throw the cupcakes away. You say you bought them so there's no chance they are filled with healthy ingredients. The guilt you will feel over wasting them won't throw you way over budget (calories) for today. And you won't feel it forever any way.

    As for your boyfriends request. How you take that is entirely up to you. I personally would die (inside) if my husband asked me to lose weight. I am shedding pounds (not losing weight as I have no intention of ever finding it again...) for me alone. Yes he enjoys the fact that my clothes are too big and I have one less chin..etc. But he has loved me "As is, no warranty" since day one. But if you feel he has your best interests...Cool.

    I wish you all the best in getting back on track. Friend me if you want. I could always use another support partner.
  • hmmm. about the boyfriend comment.
  • Eat well & stay happy that should be the motivation.
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    100% AGREE WITH THIS ^^

    Be with someone who loves you for you, makes you want to be a better person but tells you how perfect you are just as you are. Supports your goals, does not make them for you and above all else respects your decisions.

    I don't know, my goal is to smoke enough weed to start seeing things every night so if my partner is supportive of that I'm not sure what it says about him...
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    This is really far from supportive and sounds pretty darn judgemental (of the OP, of that other chick, of people who enjoy some PetPlay.) Is that what MFP is about? I am disgusted, to be frank.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?
  • Baba_Roxy
    Baba_Roxy Posts: 38 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    This is really far from supportive and sounds pretty darn judgemental (of the OP, of that other chick, of people who enjoy some PetPlay.) Is that what MFP is about? I am disgusted, to be frank.

    I do apologize if I was offensive, but I was really taken back by these remarks. I know when I was loosing weight for the sake of someone's attraction to me, I was unhappy. I wasn't doing it for me and I was not making smart choices. I was only interested in losing he weight so I could appease said significant other. But once I realized how wrong it was when they put me down or asked me to change, and how horrible I felt about myself, the weight went right up. But losing weight is a struggle, and to consistently worry that someone will leave you because you're because not thin not enough or not losing fast enough is awful. And once I let go of that person and started losing for me, it was incredibly easy and I was much happier.

    As for my pet comment, i think everyone took it in a way that i was not heading. To each their own. Have your fun!
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    Darn right. Some people are thrilled to give their partner what they want and working to please them.

    Hmph. Judgey Mcjudgement folks all up in here.
  • Baba_Roxy
    Baba_Roxy Posts: 38 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    Wow.


    And I thought MFP was supposed to be about motivation and support.


    Apparently, some people's parents didn't teach them that if they didn't have anything nice to say, they shouldn't say anything at all.


    I mean, seriously...aren't we all here for the same reason?
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.
  • ilovescarymovies
    ilovescarymovies Posts: 202 Member
    Put them in the blender - add milk, serve......

    Cupcakes in a Cup !

    yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.

    Well buddy you don't have to worry because I'll be marrying her soon and would never make her change something about herself. She doesn't need to because i love her for who she is that's what love actually is.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.

    Well buddy you don't have to worry because I'll be marrying her soon and would never make her change something about herself. She doesn't need to because i love her for who she is that's what love actually is.

    Love, actually is an awful movie.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.

    Well buddy you don't have to worry because I'll be marrying her soon and would never make her change something about herself. She doesn't need to because i love her for who she is that's what love actually is.

    You are just naive. Most 19 year olds are. You say she is perfect, but over the coming years you'll want to change things about her.
  • Hauntinglyfit
    Hauntinglyfit Posts: 5,537 Member
    wow.
    i just wanted some help about the cupcakes..
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    wow.
    i just wanted some help about the cupcakes..

    I already told you, use them to make a girl you're jealous of fat.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Put them in a box, and take them to work. You will gain karma and over all satisfaction. If not there, maybe the bank tellers? The three fourths you can put under a glass bowl and remind yourself as it slowly decomposes that is what sugar and fat does inside you :-p

    This is what sugar does inside of me, and I love it.

    tumblr_mggum1Qibc1s2jdr3o1_500.gif
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    We're all different.

    But why are we here?

    For the same reason.
  • My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.

    Well buddy you don't have to worry because I'll be marrying her soon and would never make her change something about herself. She doesn't need to because i love her for who she is that's what love actually is.

    You are just naive. Most 19 year olds are. You say she is perfect, but over the coming years you'll want to change things about her.

    Just because everyone in your life seems to want to change you doesn't mean that's the case for everyone else
  • Rayman79
    Rayman79 Posts: 2,009 Member
    This thread started out a bit meh... but then it deteriorated into great entertainment.

    I love you whierd... enough to want you to change absolutely everything about yourself!
  • lewandt
    lewandt Posts: 566 Member
    You should use them to sabotage the girls that are prettier or skinnier than you. Give them all the cupcakes and laugh internally as they get fat.
    I think we have a winner!
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    My boyfriend cares very much about my health, but he would never say a word about my weight. Not in a million years.

    Then he could be doing you a disservice. Why would he not want to tell you how to be more attractive for him?

    I agree. In my relationship he strongly suggests my outfits, hair color, hair length (what guy doesn't make you have it long though, right ladies?) and I love that he's so outspoken so I can do my part in ensuring that he's not pushed into cheating.

    So...you need to make yourself look how HE wants in order to be assured he won't cheat? So if you want to dye your hair a different color, and your man tells you no, it's end of discussion? And if you are completely healthy and of good weight, but happen to have curves, and he doesn't like them, what then? Get surgery to appease him? I mean after all, if you don't obey, he might just cheat!

    HOW ABSOLUTELY UNHEALTHY. JESUS CHRIST.

    The person you're with should be attracted to you in the first place, not slightly and then try to change you! There's a difference between them wanting you to be healthy and them wanting to change you! If you can't form your own opinions and answer to his demands even if you disagree, then you honestly have a problem. If you're happy living your life this way, fantastic. Go for it. But personally, it sounds to me like you're encouraging women to lose their self respect and follow someone else's guidelines for their appearance and thoughts.

    I mean, what ever happened to couples talking things through and coming to an agreement, and not just accepting what they're told and being walked all over? And it's pretty scary that you'll change yourself just so he won't cheat. That's not commitment. You're like a pet.

    Relationship shaming is NOT what MFP is about. You should support the OP. She is doing right by her boyfriend, giving him what he wants. Isn't that was relationships are all about?

    We have different ideas about what a relationship means. I'm sure if she told her boyfriend his penis was too small and to grow it, he wouldn't be too excited, not only by her words, but also by what she's asking. If my gf told me to get breast implants or quit my job or do something I wasn't comfortable with, I wouldn't do it just to appease her. And the same goes for her; I wouldn't ask her to do something she didn't want to do, nor would I get mad. It's compromise and it's about discussion and finding middle ground, and most importantly, respecting yourself and the person you're with.

    I know we are both talking to brick walls basically, as we have very different ideals. I'll get off this thread, and hope the cup cake crisis was averted and handled.

    The size of a penis cannot be changed the way that weight, hair, and clothing can be changed. That is a ridiculous comparison. A fair one would be his weight, hair, and clothing.

    You don't understand and this is why you aren't married.

    Well buddy you don't have to worry because I'll be marrying her soon and would never make her change something about herself. She doesn't need to because i love her for who she is that's what love actually is.

    You are just naive. Most 19 year olds are. You say she is perfect, but over the coming years you'll want to change things about her.

    Just because everyone in your life seems to want to change you doesn't mean that's the case for everyone else

    I have no one to want to change me, despite my willingness. It is life's cruel joke. :ohwell:
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    This thread started out a bit meh... but then it deteriorated into great entertainment.

    I love you whierd... enough to want you to change absolutely everything about yourself!

    What would you want me to change first?
  • Cadori
    Cadori Posts: 4,810 Member
    This thread started out a bit meh... but then it deteriorated into great entertainment.

    I love you whierd... enough to want you to change absolutely everything about yourself!

    What would you want me to change first?

    Nothing. OK. Maaaaaybe your hat.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    This thread started out a bit meh... but then it deteriorated into great entertainment.

    I love you whierd... enough to want you to change absolutely everything about yourself!

    What would you want me to change first?

    Nothing. OK. Maaaaaybe your hat.

    But I really like this hat...

    How important is it to you?