Babies in the Work Place

Iron_Lotus

I am going to bring all 6 of my kids to your workplace :bigsmile:

Joreanasaurous

Children aren't vermin, they are people. Do other people enter your workplace, like friends or relatives of co-workers? Are you this venomous about their presence or are you just bigoted against children? I am actively teaching my children to respect peoples boundaries, speak politely and try to be friendly to people. It's a shame those values arent more widespread on these forums.

There is a bit of a difference between a screaming child and a grown adult who understands how to behave in an office workplace. Either way, visitors aren't allowed in our office. So friends, family and children are all unwelcome inside my office. My work expects is to work while here. Not visit with or babysit children.

daffodilsoup

hating something doesn't make you miserable- it means you really dislike it.

I hate brownies with nuts in them.
I hate sourkrout.
I hate when people chew super loudly.

This doesn't make me miserable. It means I don't like said things and I want to escape it immediately.

At not point do I blame the child for being a child. By it's very nature of existing I dislike it. it's not IT"S fault for being a baby. But that doesn't mean I like it.


And I agree again- if my mom hated kids- she wouldn't have had them- I would never exist and therefore I wouldn't' care- I can't stand when people use that argument. Non-existent/Dead people don't care about anything. They don't exist. They have no opinion on it either way. It's a completely specious and irrelevant argument.

Much like you telling me that I'm a miserable human being for disliking something. That's just utter nonsense. Not all of us are programmed to have the 'baby' gene that makes you want to go run and fuss over a baby. All it makes me want to do is run and vomit. Literally- that type of behavior makes me ill- it's just so nonsensical to me.

Amen, brotha.

sheldonz42

Whilst I agree that, for the most part, children do not belong in the workplace, I think the unadulterated hatred of children is what is really at the root of some of our reactions.

I used to hate children. In fact, I used to hate most people in general. Then I gained an appreciation for life, and, for me, the hatred went away. I actually started to care about people. It has made my life easier and I am much happier for it.

Achrya

Achrya, I checked. Minimum wage was 5.25 where I was living, more than a decade ago. And shortly after that it was raised to 7.25. This was before you were old enough for a work permit, so that's probably why you don't recollect it.

Also, different people have a different perception of what hate means that doesn't mean they are defining it for you. They are just telling you what they perceived you to be saying. Is it really so difficult to understand that.

Also, if your parents loved you and did not harm you, then yes you are lucky for that. But, I'm sure you will all have some annoying reason why you aren't.

But she did assume there is only one blanket way it makes people feel. Is that not the whole meaning of the "well in my mind this means X and so I just can't fathom Y?" Train of thought? That she sees things one way and can't wrap her brain around another concept?

And since most parents are loving and not cruel by way of evolutionary need, no I would not attribute it to luck. Rather children who have parents that aren't that way are outliers (that's why abuse and cruelty against children invoke such outraged and visceral reactions, because it's not the norm). Being part of the norm is far from luck I'm afraid. That's like saying you're lucky to be born with 10 toes; not really, it's pretty expected.

I'm sorry if you find what I believe to be reasonable assessment and responses to be annoying. While you clearly have different views rest assured I'm able to open my mind, see your point of view, and will not make comments on how I just can't fathom it.

BinaryPulsar

Achrya, I checked. Minimum wage was 5.25 where I was living, more than a decade ago. And shortly after that it was raised to 7.25. This was before you were old enough for a work permit, so that's probably why you don't recollect it.

Also, different people have a different perception of what hate means that doesn't mean they are defining it for you. They are just telling you what they perceived you to be saying. Is it really so difficult to understand that.

Also, if your parents loved you and did not harm you, then yes you are lucky for that. But, I'm sure you will all have some annoying reason why you aren't.

But she did assume there is only one blanket way it makes people feel. Is that not the whole meaning of the "well in my mind this means X and so I just can't fathom Y?" Train of thought? That she sees things one way and can't wrap her brain around another concept?

And since most parents are loving and not cruel by way of evolutionary need, no I would not attribute it to luck. Rather children who have parents that way are outliers (that's why abuse and cruelty against children become such outraged and visceral reactions, because it's nit the norm). Being part of the norm is far from luck I'm afraid. That's like saying your lucky to be born with 10 toes; not really, it's pretty expected.

I'm sorry if you find what I believe to be reasonable assessment and responses to be annoying. While you clearly have different views rest assured I'm able to open my mind, see your point of view, and will not make comments on how I just can't fathom it.

I just think you are taking something for granted by assuming it is the norm. I figured you would have that response. I find that annoying, just like you find children annoying. I also don't recall saying I just couldn't fathom anything. But, if I did, it was probably just me talking about what I am or am not capable of. I can't fathom growing up, being a small child, and not having been abused. That is outside of my range of what I am able to imagine or perceive because it is so far outside of my experience from way back when I was still developing. On the other hand, I am a parent now, so I see my children having a very different, very innocent, happy, safe childhood, and that has opened my mind more to that experience.

MaryJane_8810002

Damn this thread is still going?

abetterbrandi

Thank you thank you a 10000xs thank you for posting this. People in my work seem to think its a free for all to bring in your kids. I work at the reception desk so I have NO hiding place. I hate kids. I dont care, I dont want to engage just keep them away from me. One guy even PUT A CHAIR NEXT TO MINE AND TOLD HIS KID IT WAS OKAY TO COLOR AT MY DESK BECAUSE SHE 'LIKED ME'. **** everything about that.

Another huge annoyance...I dont want kids, dont push your kids on me. I dont tell you to stop breeding, so stop telling me to have babies!

Achrya

Achrya, I checked. Minimum wage was 5.25 where I was living, more than a decade ago. And shortly after that it was raised to 7.25. This was before you were old enough for a work permit, so that's probably why you don't recollect it.

Also, different people have a different perception of what hate means that doesn't mean they are defining it for you. They are just telling you what they perceived you to be saying. Is it really so difficult to understand that.

Also, if your parents loved you and did not harm you, then yes you are lucky for that. But, I'm sure you will all have some annoying reason why you aren't.

But she did assume there is only one blanket way it makes people feel. Is that not the whole meaning of the "well in my mind this means X and so I just can't fathom Y?" Train of thought? That she sees things one way and can't wrap her brain around another concept?

And since most parents are loving and not cruel by way of evolutionary need, no I would not attribute it to luck. Rather children who have parents that way are outliers (that's why abuse and cruelty against children become such outraged and visceral reactions, because it's nit the norm). Being part of the norm is far from luck I'm afraid. That's like saying your lucky to be born with 10 toes; not really, it's pretty expected.

I'm sorry if you find what I believe to be reasonable assessment and responses to be annoying. While you clearly have different views rest assured I'm able to open my mind, see your point of view, and will not make comments on how I just can't fathom it.

I just think you are taking something for granted by assuming it is the norm. I figured you would have that response. I find that annoying, just like you find children annoying.

I don't assume it's the norm, it is the norm. I don't feel lucky for falling into the normal course of things. Grateful, yes, but not lucky.

I don't find children annoying. I find commercials annoying. Children I hate.

BinaryPulsar

Any person that tells people that hate children that they should have babies has a screw loose.

Collier78

Oh and please don't lump all of us parents (even the uber kid loving ones) in the whole pile of those that think they know your lives better than you do... I for one don't tell childless people "they will change their minds"... I just don't care either way...

Yeah, I don't do that either. Having kids is not for everyone. Just like a lot of things in life.

QFT! There are some people I would sterilize! I have three..and the oldest (13) sometimes comes in with me if I have to come back to work to do something, but she generally sits in my office and reads or plays with her phone...She can't walk the shop floor with me because she doesn't have safety shoes, and I wouldn't want to take her out in that environment. Generally this is only for a quick pop in and out arrangement.

I also have several childless friends...I would NEVER imply to any of them that they are unfulfilled as non parents...a couple of them, I can't even imagine as parents...I am puzzled over the hate though...

Is it the babies themselves you hate? Or is it the narcissistic parents that want to try to force you to love them? Babies are all cuddly and smell good (until their about 6 months)...Toddlers...they are a breed all their own..

linzchapates

OP- It sucks when you have to put up with things at work you aren't supposed to. I can understand how it would be annoying, especially if you don't like kids to start with!
I work on an industrial Mine site and kids aren't allowed on the property... cyanide, arsenic and PAX don't mix with little grub hooks lol
I don't hate kids, love 'em actually... got one of my own, she's fantastic! But, there' s a time and place and it's really inconsiderate for people to push their kids onto you, boundries are important!

KatrinaWilke

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

BinaryPulsar

Achrya, I checked. Minimum wage was 5.25 where I was living, more than a decade ago. And shortly after that it was raised to 7.25. This was before you were old enough for a work permit, so that's probably why you don't recollect it.

Also, different people have a different perception of what hate means that doesn't mean they are defining it for you. They are just telling you what they perceived you to be saying. Is it really so difficult to understand that.

Also, if your parents loved you and did not harm you, then yes you are lucky for that. But, I'm sure you will all have some annoying reason why you aren't.

But she did assume there is only one blanket way it makes people feel. Is that not the whole meaning of the "well in my mind this means X and so I just can't fathom Y?" Train of thought? That she sees things one way and can't wrap her brain around another concept?

And since most parents are loving and not cruel by way of evolutionary need, no I would not attribute it to luck. Rather children who have parents that way are outliers (that's why abuse and cruelty against children become such outraged and visceral reactions, because it's nit the norm). Being part of the norm is far from luck I'm afraid. That's like saying your lucky to be born with 10 toes; not really, it's pretty expected.

I'm sorry if you find what I believe to be reasonable assessment and responses to be annoying. While you clearly have different views rest assured I'm able to open my mind, see your point of view, and will not make comments on how I just can't fathom it.

I just think you are taking something for granted by assuming it is the norm. I figured you would have that response. I find that annoying, just like you find children annoying.

I don't assume it's the norm, it is the norm. I don't feel lucky for falling into the normal course of things. Grateful, yes, but not lucky.

I don't find children annoying. I find commercials annoying. Children I hate.

I don't recall saying I couldn't fathom something. But, if I did, I was describing the state of my own mind and experience and that does not mean that I am not open to understanding. It actually would mean that I would like to try and gain the understanding. If I say, I can't fathom something, then I am asking for more information and descriptions and things that would help me understand and I am telling you how far away from understanding that I am, so you have that information. Seems pretty logical to me.

BinaryPulsar

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

Uuuum, why don't you just get a tubal ligation? Again, no doctor will remove your internal organs unless there is a medical reason, or you have been psychologically cleared for gender reassignment surgery.

JeniferEverx3

When I was 12, my mom gave birth to my little brother. I fell head over heels in love with this baby. When my mom had to go back to work, I voluntarily did much of the work caring for him. I changed diapers, kissed boo-boos, bathed him, dressed him, played with him. He would run to me when he was upset when my mom wasn't home. By the time I was 14 I diagnosed myself with "baby-itis." :laugh: I was completely immersed with wanting to be a mother. No not at 14, but I felt that being a mother was my purpose in life. Whenever a teacher or another adult would ask what I wanted to be when I grew up, I no longer said a novelist or a clothing designer. I said a mommy. That is all I wanted and I could not wait to be ready to do so.

Many years later, when friends and associates and relatives started having children, I began to notice some of them and MANY MANY strangers when I would go out places and their children. I saw screaming crying children who didn't listen, parents who screamed back which did not fix the problem but just added to it, parents who just plain paid no attention to their children, wandering off and touching things they shouldn't be touching, getting in the way of other people. I saw facebook statuses complaining about "wish my kid would go to sleep" "wish my kid would let me clean the house" "wish i had time/money/energy to get a manicure" "wish i could find a babysitter" "wish I didn't have to work 3 jobs and go to school because I have 8 kids."

The more I listened/read the experiences and thoughts of people who actually had children, the more it KILLED my desire to have them myself.

Other than when I'm at work, I go to bed when I want, sleep as long as I want, I spend my money on whatever I want, I have time to do things I enjoy, I don't have to work multiple jobs, I don't have to stress about how I can make sure this human being I brought into the world grows up to be a productive, positive member of society, etc. etc.

To add to this, I have a younger cousin who thinks she is God's gift to motherhood. She has 2 young children, and she is adamant about feeding them healthy/organic food only (good choice), raising them with manners and not spoiling them too much (also good) and never going out to clubs/bars and partying all the time like a lot of younger mothers these days do (also not a bad choice). However, I disagree with her (I have never said this to her) that all of those things make her the most perfect mom ever in the universe, as she seems to think. She takes every opportunity, whether invited or not, even it has NOTHING to do with her at all, to lecture people (including myself) about why they are wrong and she is right, she treats me as if I am a horrible person because I have no desire to have children, and she often misunderstands my reasoning for it. Like a lot of people who have posted in this thread, any intelligent human being understands that children are children and they can't be perfect, what most people have a problem with is the lack of good parenting that many people have these days. I come from a generation of 16 and pregnant. So many girls I went to HS with got pregnant in HS. There's a reason teen pregnancy is frowned upon and it is not just because they are generally not financially capable, or because THEY'RE parents often end up with the burden of raising children they didn't ask for. It is because teenagers DON'T KNOW WTF THEY ARE DOING (for the most part). They don't know what they're doing but what makes it worse is that they think they do, and they will never correct they're complete lack of skills at raising children. The rest of the world is forced to deal with their annoying offspring. There are also plenty of adults that suck at it as well. I think my cousin is a terrible mother, simply because her children are going to grow up thinking they are better than everyone else, and judging people every chance they get, just as she does.

I have literally disowned my cousin because she is the most judgemental, self-righteous see-you-next-tuesday I have ever met in my life. She makes me sick. I'll complain bc I didn't get enough sleep, and she'll say "I never get enough sleep, I have kids." B!TCH, you CHOSE to have kids. I have no kids, therefore I am allowed to be miserable when I am exhausted. YOU are allowed to be miserable if you're exhausted, you just can't blame your kids for it because you're the one who brought them into the world in the first place. Another example is I once posted a picture of a really cool manicure I did myself, and she said I wish I had the time to do my nails. I replied with yea, that's one of the reasons I'm grateful that I don't have children, and she proceeded to lecture me about how children are the most amazing wonderful gifts God could ever bless you with blah blah blah.
Kids are wonderful. Kids are a blessing. But not all people have the desire or are meant to have them. It doesn't mean I hate kids. In fact, I don't hate kids. I hate the parents of the kids who get the hell on my nerves.

End rant LOL

Achrya

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

I've been trying to get my tubes tied forever but alas, I'm only 18-20-21-22-23-23-25-26 and with more time I'll change my mind. So now I've got the implant, because 3 years of freedom is the best I can hope for apparently.

Achrya

Achrya, I checked. Minimum wage was 5.25 where I was living, more than a decade ago. And shortly after that it was raised to 7.25. This was before you were old enough for a work permit, so that's probably why you don't recollect it.

Also, different people have a different perception of what hate means that doesn't mean they are defining it for you. They are just telling you what they perceived you to be saying. Is it really so difficult to understand that.

Also, if your parents loved you and did not harm you, then yes you are lucky for that. But, I'm sure you will all have some annoying reason why you aren't.

But she did assume there is only one blanket way it makes people feel. Is that not the whole meaning of the "well in my mind this means X and so I just can't fathom Y?" Train of thought? That she sees things one way and can't wrap her brain around another concept?

And since most parents are loving and not cruel by way of evolutionary need, no I would not attribute it to luck. Rather children who have parents that way are outliers (that's why abuse and cruelty against children become such outraged and visceral reactions, because it's nit the norm). Being part of the norm is far from luck I'm afraid. That's like saying your lucky to be born with 10 toes; not really, it's pretty expected.

I'm sorry if you find what I believe to be reasonable assessment and responses to be annoying. While you clearly have different views rest assured I'm able to open my mind, see your point of view, and will not make comments on how I just can't fathom it.

I just think you are taking something for granted by assuming it is the norm. I figured you would have that response. I find that annoying, just like you find children annoying.

I don't assume it's the norm, it is the norm. I don't feel lucky for falling into the normal course of things. Grateful, yes, but not lucky.

I don't find children annoying. I find commercials annoying. Children I hate.

I don't recall saying I couldn't fathom something. But, if I did, I was describing the state of my own mind and experience and that does not mean that I am not open to understanding. It actually would mean that I would like to try and gain the understanding. If I say, I can't fathom something, then I am asking for more information and descriptions and things that would help me understand and I am telling you how far away from understanding that I am, so you have that information. Seems pretty logical to me.

It was a snide reference to someone else.

BinaryPulsar

No one is assuming that people who don't want to be parents or who don't want to be around children hate children. We are only bringing that up because some people are saying they do indeed hate children.

KatrinaWilke

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

I've been trying to get my tubes tied forever but alas, I'm only 18-20-21-22-23-23-25-26 and with more time I'll change my mind. So now I've got the implant, because 3 years of freedom is the best I can hope for apparently.

I'm on my second implant!!

BinaryPulsar

You could find another doctor. I know people that got tubal ligations in their 20's.

KatrinaWilke

I'll complain bc I didn't get enough sleep, and she'll say "I never get enough sleep, I have kids." B!TCH, you CHOSE to have kids. I have no kids, therefore I am allowed to be miserable when I am exhausted. YOU are allowed to be miserable if you're exhausted, you just can't blame your kids for it because you're the one who brought them into the world in the first place. Another example is I once posted a picture of a really cool manicure I did myself, and she said I wish I had the time to do my nails.

This is why I stopped eating lunch in our breakroom at work. I got tired of hearing these kinds of responses to everything I would say!

Achrya

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

I've been trying to get my tubes tied forever but alas, I'm only 18-20-21-22-23-23-25-26 and with more time I'll change my mind. So now I've got the implant, because 3 years of freedom is the best I can hope for apparently.

I'm on my second implant!!

I'm fond of it. The peace of mind is priceless.

Achrya

You could find another doctor. I know people that got tubal ligations in their 20's.

I can only speak for myself, but the military isn't exactly giving me a list of possible doctors I could swap to, unless I want to pay out of pocket.

BinaryPulsar

You could find another doctor. I know people that got tubal ligations in their 20's.

I can only speak for myself, but the military isn't exactly giving me a list of possible doctors I could swap to, unless I want to pay out of pocket.

Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. I live in Canada.

WeepingAngel81

I asked my doctor if she would take my uterus out... she glared at me and said NO.

Mine said no to...supposedly she knows me better than I do and knows I will "change my mind"

I've been trying to get my tubes tied forever but alas, I'm only 18-20-21-22-23-23-25-26 and with more time I'll change my mind. So now I've got the implant, because 3 years of freedom is the best I can hope for apparently.

I'm on my second implant!!

I had an ablation done 2 years ago. Having your tubes tied is part of that process. If your monthly is bad enough, you can ask your doctor about this as an option.

JoRocka

I'll complain bc I didn't get enough sleep, and she'll say "I never get enough sleep, I have kids." B!TCH, you CHOSE to have kids. I have no kids, therefore I am allowed to be miserable when I am exhausted. YOU are allowed to be miserable if you're exhausted, you just can't blame your kids for it because you're the one who brought them into the world in the first place. Another example is I once posted a picture of a really cool manicure I did myself, and she said I wish I had the time to do my nails.

This is why I stopped eating lunch in our break room at work. I got tired of hearing these kinds of responses to everything I would say!

I have a hard time with people who complain about things that are directly related to their kids.

All I can say is you know a box of condoms costs 15 bucks. I just can't.

I REALLY honestly dislike parents who are terrible apathetic parents.

But I also really really really dislike babies- and toddlers. Really- I don't like them. Much the same way I don't like slugs. I find them icky and I don't want to be around them.


We don't all have to love every animal/thing/food equally.

KatrinaWilke

I'll complain bc I didn't get enough sleep, and she'll say "I never get enough sleep, I have kids." B!TCH, you CHOSE to have kids. I have no kids, therefore I am allowed to be miserable when I am exhausted. YOU are allowed to be miserable if you're exhausted, you just can't blame your kids for it because you're the one who brought them into the world in the first place. Another example is I once posted a picture of a really cool manicure I did myself, and she said I wish I had the time to do my nails.

This is why I stopped eating lunch in our break room at work. I got tired of hearing these kinds of responses to everything I would say!

I have a hard time with people who complain about things that are directly related to their kids.

All I can say is you know a box of condoms costs 15 bucks. I just can't.

I REALLY honestly dislike parents who are terrible apathetic parents.

But I also really really really dislike babies- and toddlers. Really- I don't like them. Much the same way I don't like slugs. I find them icky and I don't want to be around them.


We don't all have to love every animal/thing/food equally.

It's funny, you mentioned earlier that people say you would make a great parent, yet you hate kids. I really really don't want kids and can't stand to be around them, yet everyone says I would make an awesome mom! So sorry, but I don't want to have kids!

suziepoo1984

I'll complain bc I didn't get enough sleep, and she'll say "I never get enough sleep, I have kids." B!TCH, you CHOSE to have kids. I have no kids, therefore I am allowed to be miserable when I am exhausted. YOU are allowed to be miserable if you're exhausted, you just can't blame your kids for it because you're the one who brought them into the world in the first place. Another example is I once posted a picture of a really cool manicure I did myself, and she said I wish I had the time to do my nails.

This is why I stopped eating lunch in our breakroom at work. I got tired of hearing these kinds of responses to everything I would say!

Why dont you tell them this on their face and not here? Maybe you would hear from them some annoying things you have been saying too! All of us are annoying in some way or other :flowerforyou:

paultireland

I am the daughter of a beautiful 6 year old girl, and at no point during her brief life have I ever been tempted to bring her to my job. I also had enough class not to bring her to nice restaurants where people might be dating, or to movie theaters where people spend a lot of money to be able to see and hear the film. The people who do that are the same kind who allow their kids to run around the restaurant or movie theater like animals in blinking light up shoes and you're not supposed to say anything about it.

Not all parents are the same, and I feel your pain.