What's the purpose of marriage?

fitmusiclifeviola

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meshashesha2012

^fixed it for ya. use img tags

coretemp

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coretemp

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Zylahe

Visa / passport
Or tax benefits.
The only reasons to get married.

Mangopickle

Each of you dying to self and becoming one flesh. It is an external visible sign of an inner invisible grace. I was mentored by some wonderful marriages. My paternal and maternal grandparents were deeply in love until death. My parents and my husband's parents are still in love. The interesting thing is that they all held their marriages as their #1 priority. Nothing and I mean nothing was as important. No parent, no child, no job, no finances. And it was very obvious that their love was carnal as well. I was mortified in high school to realize my parents were enjoying the marital bed 2-3 times a wk. You can't hide this in a small household LOL. My marriage is my number one priority and I can't adequately explain how much grace and happiness I have received from this sacrament. If cancer comes, if poverty comes I know he will be there and he knows that I will do the same. I see couples spending hours watching tv, shopping, going to parties and events. Filling their lives with stuff and activities and I wonder when do they have time to make love? Nothing is more fun than giving yourself unreservedly to your lover and having them do the same. In the afterglow, in the wee small hours when all defenses and masks are put aside, in the naked truth of moonlight you build something that is more than you. Something sacred. I pray love finds you.

19TaraLynn84

Each of you dying to self and becoming one flesh. It is an external visible sign of an inner invisible grace. I was mentored by some wonderful marriages. My paternal and maternal grandparents were deeply in love until death. My parents and my husband's parents are still in love. The interesting thing is that they all held their marriages as their #1 priority. Nothing and I mean nothing was as important. No parent, no child, no job, no finances. And it was very obvious that their love was carnal as well. I was mortified in high school to realize my parents were enjoying the marital bed 2-3 times a wk. You can't hide this in a small household LOL. My marriage is my number one priority and I can't adequately explain how much grace and happiness I have received from this sacrament. If cancer comes, if poverty comes I know he will be there and he knows that I will do the same. I see couples spending hours watching tv, shopping, going to parties and events. Filling their lives with stuff and activities and I wonder when do they have time to make love? Nothing is more fun than giving yourself unreservedly to your lover and having them do the same. In the afterglow, in the wee small hours when all defenses and masks are put aside, in the naked truth of moonlight you build something that is more than you. Something sacred. I pray love finds you.

Beautifully put!

MSeel1984

^fixed it for ya. use img tags

Well and beautifully said. Agree 100%

WendyTerry420

So now she gets allimony, 401K and Child Support. Because all three are NOT to be reported as a income, she can then collect wellfare, WIC, Food Stamps, etc, etc.

That's hard to believe. I don't live in Illinois, so I'm not saying it's impossible, but that's very hard to believe.

I find it hard to believe as well. There is a huge difference between taxable income for 1040 purposes and income that is reportable to get welfare. In Missouri, all of those things are included as income for welfare applications.

WendyTerry420

To spend a lot of money. Makes breaking up more difficult. To take over someones last name. Filing taxes together. Other than that it's like dating. Nothing special.

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

DMZ_1

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

Why is dating effed up? I really do agree, just want to see your logic. How does the script get flipped?

Dottie27

I understand your viewpoints as I felt the same way after my first marriage ended in divorce. And, yes, if you have not found someone you would gladly give or share your possessions with, you have not found the right person. I have now been married over 25 years to my second husband and don't want to think about what my life would have been without him.

mank32

when all defenses and masks are put aside, in the naked truth of moonlight you build something that is more than you. Something sacred. I pray love finds you.

wins thread. :claps:

what a writer!

just_Jennie1

I see couples spending hours watching tv, shopping, going to parties and events. Filling their lives with stuff and activities and I wonder when do they have time to make love?

I'm not sure I quite understand this. To me it sounds like you're saying that couples shouldn't be doing these things together and should instead be boinking in the bedroom 24/7. My husband and I spend time doing "stuff" and we manage to fit sexy time into our lives quite often.

wolfsbayne

I see couples spending hours watching tv, shopping, going to parties and events. Filling their lives with stuff and activities and I wonder when do they have time to make love?

I'm not sure I quite understand this. To me it sounds like you're saying that couples shouldn't be doing these things together and should instead be boinking in the bedroom 24/7. My husband and I spend time doing "stuff" and we manage to fit sexy time into our lives quite often.

us, too. We're kinda cheesy, too. We hold hands while we are watching tv :blushing: Heck, we hold hands A LOT. Just as long as we are touching...it's very important that we keep that connection.

WendyTerry420

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

Why is dating effed up? I really do agree, just want to see your logic. How does the script get flipped?

Because there's so much drama!

Why didn't he call?

Why did he wait three days to call?

Why is he calling me after I already said yes to someone else?


Why did he say that?

Why did he say it in that way?


Etc. ad nauseum...

Even back when I was dating, I tried to stick with one guy at a time. I hate drama.

msf74

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

Why is dating effed up? I really do agree, just want to see your logic. How does the script get flipped?

I don't know about the other poster but for me modern dating is the antithesis of marriage.

Marriage, as I view it, is about authenticity and intimacy. You and your partner working together with shared goals, supporting and loving each other to become better people and succeed in life. It is about co-operation, mutual respect and caring.

Dating it seems is altogether different. You have to play the game. It is more about putting on an artificial front, exerting power and manipulating a situation. If marriage is about honesty, dating is about lies.

Personally, if I ever found myself to be single again there is no way in god's green earth that I would "date."

MinMin97

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

Why is dating effed up? I really do agree, just want to see your logic. How does the script get flipped?

I don't know about the other poster but for me modern dating is the antithesis of marriage.

Marriage, as I view it, is about authenticity and intimacy. You and your partner working together with shared goals, supporting and loving each other to become better people and succeed in life. It is about co-operation, mutual respect and caring.

Dating it seems is altogether different. You have to play the game. It is more about putting on an artificial front, exerting power and manipulating a situation. If marriage is about honesty, dating is about lies.

Personally, if I ever found myself to be single again there is no way in god's green earth that I would "date."

Well put. Dating is an exercise in divorce, not preparation for marriage.

DMZ_1

Meh. Dating is effed up. Marriage is pretty awesome.

Why is dating effed up? I really do agree, just want to see your logic. How does the script get flipped?

Because there's so much drama!

Why didn't he call?

Why did he wait three days to call?

Why is he calling me after I already said yes to someone else?


Why did he say that?

Why did he say it in that way?

[/quote]

Yes, there are way too many issues that come up. Interesting that you chose the phone as an example. It seems like you've been off the scene for a while. Phone calls are so infrequent now in the early stages of dating, which I think is detrimental because a phone call is a better way of transmitting meaning than a text message. It is taught that only 7% of communication is words. In any text based form of communication (text messages, email, forum posts, written articles), the message originator has to be extremely precise with wording to get the right message across. Even still, there is room for interpretation. With a phone call, there are vocal cues to go along with the words, enhancing meaning. When two people are still generally unfamiliar with each other, the more enhancements to the communication process, the better relationship formation will be. I'm a big believer in only having text messages for arranging logistics of in person get togethers in early stages, not carrying out conversations that have even a modicum of depth. Over reliance on the text message is a big downfall that I think anyone who has dated since the mid to late 2000s has had to deal with.

I don't know about the other poster but for me modern dating is the antithesis of marriage.

Marriage, as I view it, is about authenticity and intimacy. You and your partner working together with shared goals, supporting and loving each other to become better people and succeed in life. It is about co-operation, mutual respect and caring.

Dating it seems is altogether different. You have to play the game. It is more about putting on an artificial front, exerting power and manipulating a situation. If marriage is about honesty, dating is about lies.

Personally, if I ever found myself to be single again there is no way in god's green earth that I would "date."

There's a lot of posturing in the early stages of dating. Both sexes are guilty of this. As people age, the posturing does not go down in my experience, but in a marriage there's still a need to exhibit behaviors in a way that enhances attraction. A lot of couples talk about growing apart over time, and I think an extreme deviation from behaviors that initially brought about the attraction is a part of this.

To me, the sweet spot is between the wretched early stages (first 8 weeks or so) and the stagnancy of a multi year relationship. I do think there is a tendency to show complacency and take the relationship for granted.

asimmons221

I've been with my girlfriend for 6 years, we both share the view that we don't see the point in marriage. A lot of people posted positive things about relationships and marriage, but you don't need a ceremony to take your relationship to the next level.