Does anyone actually want help?
dwithbenefithfc
Posts: 30
Or do you more-so want to vent on these boards? Talk about fads that you cycle through, ask very specific impossible questions to answer in a paragraph, defend the protocol you follow although you may not be seeing ANY results..
As a fitness professional, i use MFP to help my clients stay accountable and to track my own macros. I occasionally visit the boards to help out, maybe clear up some confusion, answer questions etc...
Most of the time it seems like people dont really want to hear it? they dont want truths or accuracy. They want...sympathy.
Can anyone shed some light? or am i just being cynical
As a fitness professional, i use MFP to help my clients stay accountable and to track my own macros. I occasionally visit the boards to help out, maybe clear up some confusion, answer questions etc...
Most of the time it seems like people dont really want to hear it? they dont want truths or accuracy. They want...sympathy.
Can anyone shed some light? or am i just being cynical
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Replies
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I think you are correct. Most of the time, I think people know the truth, but don't want to hear it and sometimes don't want advice from others.0
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Many people's idea of "support" is just agreeing with them and farting rainbows and ****ting jelly beans...0
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That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!0
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Or do you more-so want to vent on these boards? Talk about fads that you cycle through, ask very specific impossible questions to answer in a paragraph, defend the protocol you follow although you may not be seeing ANY results..
As a fitness professional, i use MFP to help my clients stay accountable and to track my own macros. I occasionally visit the boards to help out, maybe clear up some confusion, answer questions etc...
Most of the time it seems like people dont really want to hear it? they dont want truths or accuracy. They want...sympathy.
Can anyone shed some light? or am i just being cynical
Some people want unvarnished truth. Some people want sympathy or empathy. Some people want to vent. Some people want to proselytize. Some people want to argue. Some people want to post funny gifs.
And sometimes, that "some people" is the same person - just experiencing different moods or needs. Don't sweat it. :smokin:0 -
I think you are correct. Most of the time, I think people know the truth, but don't want to hear it and sometimes don't want advice from others.
^^^ Yip!0 -
Many people's idea of "support" is just agreeing with them and farting rainbows and ****ting jelly beans...
Yes, most people come here hoping they will be patted on the shoulder like they would in a Weight Watchers meeting. Then they realize that they will not be patronized.0 -
Some people want unvarnished truth. Some people want sympathy or empathy. Some people want to vent. Some people want to proselytize. Some people want to argue. Some people want to post funny gifs. ods or needs. Don't sweat it. :smokin:
I just want cookies. Honest0 -
Many people's idea of "support" is just agreeing with them and farting rainbows and ****ting jelly beans...
Bingo. People get their feelings hurt and feel "bullied" if you disagree and don't apologize for being blunt. Sorry. Sugar coating is for little kids. Grow up, put on your big boy/big girl panties and suck it up. If something that someone says hurts, that's likely because it has an element of truth to it.0 -
That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!0 -
That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
Many, Many years ago, I went to the Yahoo Chat rooms for fitness, weight loss, etc...
All people wanted to do was complain about how big they had gotten and no one wanted to discuss exercise.
Needless to say, those chat rooms never became a habit.0 -
There are people here who know what they're on about.
When they try to help or correct a myth they get called a meanie. People don't really want to take on board information that could help them. It's tiresome and dis-inclines you to help.
Sometimes people are genuinely seeking help and advice and take things on board and hopefully improve their fitness or overcome whatever problem they had. It's rare, but nice to see.0 -
One has already stomped off and deactivated. I think it also would help if people understood how forums in general worked. But, that's asking waaay too much.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!0 -
You're completely right. I'm an exercise physiologist.. I do healthy living/working out/eating healthy for a career. I don't even bother posting advice anymore.0
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One has already stomped off and deactivated. I think it also would help if people understood how forums in general worked. But, that's asking waaay too much.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
I really hope that's the low carb woman!0 -
That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
Also, yeah...it is that time of the year. One of my resolutions this year was to be more patient and try to help more people...I'm doing the best I can, but damn...it's hard and I forget how much nonsense has been drilled into peoples heads by the "health and fitness" industry that is mostly just trying to sell them a product and could really give a rats *kitten* if they're successful in becoming healthy and fit.0 -
Well here's a question that plagues me. I hear about macros and I am curious what is most important; trying to reach goal weight; keeping calories under or reaching your maximum macros? I did just start lifting weights again and I am trying to eat as much protein as possible. I also try to keep my carbs lower than what I am allowed. I have been losing steadily but want to make sure this trend continues. Am I worrying too much about keeping calories low? I'll open my diary of you want to look at my last few days. Thanks0
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One has already stomped off and deactivated. I think it also would help if people understood how forums in general worked. But, that's asking waaay too much.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
I really hope that's the low carb woman!
:bigsmile:0 -
It seems to me that people think supporting them is telling them what they want to hear, instead of what they need to hear. I would love to have friends kicking my butt seriously when I fall off the wagon, instead of ow well this one time, or what ever. I have done it as well and have seen it is not always appreciated. Yeah well, do you want support or not? :huh:0
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I'm still amazed that people believe marketing campaigns, and then complain when they're overstated. You must realize that someone is trying to sell you something. And just because fruit loops are made with whole grain does not make them "healthy". Of course they aren't unhealthy either, they just are. You have to figure out if it fits in your diet or not. But, they're hoping that "whole grain" will make you buy it. They're out to make money. Ugh.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
Also, yeah...it is that time of the year. One of my resolutions this year was to be more patient and try to help more people...I'm doing the best I can, but damn...it's hard and I forget how much nonsense has been drilled into peoples heads by the "health and fitness" industry that is mostly just trying to sell them a product and could really give a rats *kitten* if they're successful in becoming healthy and fit.
And that's not even touching on the get thin quick schemes. Super tired of the phrase "no negative comments" or "only positive reviews". No one likes reality...0 -
One has already stomped off and deactivated. I think it also would help if people understood how forums in general worked. But, that's asking waaay too much.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
I really hope that's the low carb woman!
:bigsmile:
:devil:
I think I'm getting hangry... I'm off to eat carbs.... (And protein and fat)0 -
It's a learning curve. People have preconceived ideas about health, fitness and diet. I did too when I started. Sometimes we all just think we know better. Eventually people give up or realize that some of the things they probably did not want to hear were and are the things that will work
0 -
Or do you more-so want to vent on these boards? Talk about fads that you cycle through, ask very specific impossible questions to answer in a paragraph, defend the protocol you follow although you may not be seeing ANY results..
As a fitness professional, i use MFP to help my clients stay accountable and to track my own macros. I occasionally visit the boards to help out, maybe clear up some confusion, answer questions etc...
Most of the time it seems like people dont really want to hear it? they dont want truths or accuracy. They want...sympathy.
Can anyone shed some light? or am i just being cynical
Lately it seems like those who are coming here for help get knocked down with sarcastic/jibberish like answers and then the thread gets way off topic of what the original person asked. I like coming here to see if I can help or get help. Initially people don't want to hear the truth but the more they hear it the more they are going to have to accept it.0 -
This thread:
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We want OUR LEVEL of truth meaning if a beginner like me is reading the boards we are discerning whether or not the advice is practical for us. I know my strengths and weaknesses and if I see advice that fits me then yeah I will adhere. But if I see someone saying lift weights 3 days a week ... P90X 2 days...log calories and weigh your food!!!....Then of course you just lost me. Now everything they said is TRUTH and will work but hey that plan personally does not work for me. Just me 2 cents.0
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I"m a relative n00b to MFP, but been losing (and gaining) weight my entire life. I think there are people who honestly want advice and help, I know I am one. I don't mind blunt, truthful, fact based advice, but what I see on a lot of the posts is people being rude and insulting.
The old saying about catching more flies with honey is true. Starting off a post by calling someone a stupid idiot is not a way to get them to listen to advice. They will immediately tune out everything that follows and focus on their hurt feelings. I suggest stepping back, and just giving them fact based information on why they are wrong or what they need.
And a dose of patience helps of course. 0 -
A lot of these posts are submitted by trolls, bored and looking to get people worked up. I have to say though, some of them are pretty amusing at times.0
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Sometimes people really do need help.
All those "I can't seem to eat 1200 calories" posts? I copy and paste a list of healthy fat/carb foods into a PM and usually get a heart-felt thank you.
The people who really want to figure out what they need to do, I direct to http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/10118-eat-train-progress
People get real help there, not just MFP debate.
If you really want to help people and are credentialed, I'd love to see you start a moderated forum where people can ask for advice and get informed answers. As much help as Sarauk and SideSteel are, they have limited amounts of time.
Some people just aren't ready to listen to the answers. I, personally, don't waste a lot of time on them. When they are ready to hear, there's plenty of help around.0 -
If you honestly see posts calling someone stupid or idiotic, they should be reported. That's against the rules of the forum.I"m a relative n00b to MFP, but been losing (and gaining) weight my entire life. I think there are people who honestly want advice and help, I know I am one. I don't mind blunt, truthful, fact based advice, but what I see on a lot of the posts is people being rude and insulting.
The old saying about catching more flies with honey is true. Starting off a post by calling someone a stupid idiot is not a way to get them to listen to advice. They will immediately tune out everything that follows and focus on their hurt feelings. I suggest stepping back, and just giving them fact based information on why they are wrong or what they need.
And a dose of patience helps of course.0 -
One has already stomped off and deactivated. I think it also would help if people understood how forums in general worked. But, that's asking waaay too much.That's a relief! I'm very surprised to see anyone agree!
You've obviously seen the same threads as me... January newbies are driving me mad already... Time to stay out the forums for a month or so!
I really hope that's the low carb woman!
:laugh: :laugh:0 -
It's a learning curve. People have preconceived ideas about health, fitness and diet. I did too when I started. Sometimes we all just think we know better. Eventually people give up or realize that some of the things they probably did not want to hear were and are the things that will work
^^^^ This. ^^^
So, this is going to be really ugly, but OP, what are YOU hoping will happen with this post?
Do you actually WANT to know why we come here?
Are you just venting?
Do you think that somehow complaining about newbies is going to change these forums?
Everyone starts somewhere. Either choose to be patient or don't visit the forums. You're not going to change them.0
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