Who are we losing weight for... Really?
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I started out wanting to lose to feel sexy, but now it's changed. I will say for health and family. I want to be able to go outside and play with my grand kids. I want to be able to walk without pain, one leg is weak from two back surgeries. At 380 lbs., I was dying. I want to live. I don't care who thinks I sexy as long as I'm healthy and live a long life.
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I am a happy married woman and don't take me wrong but I do have to tell you..."If that is your true body in that picture..Man you are ripped!!!!!!!!" What a great accomplishment and hard work and dedication!!!!
(This was meant for another person that had commented..Dunno what happened)0 -
Do you want honesty? I wanted to lose weight to feel more confident in my body, but it was actually my mother´s comment that was the wake up call. 2 years ago, I read an email from my mom to my psychologist (looong story) where she said that I was slightly overweight but she never said anything to me, fearing she would upset me (my mom is a doctor) . I felt terrible about myself. I always knew that I was chubby, but this made me feel like the most ugliest creature on earth (I know, totally overreacting).
So then I started my weight loss journey (before joining MFP) ,lost about 30 lbs and here I am.0 -
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If you're fat:
- You get hit by a bicycle... everybody worries about the skinny person on the bicycle... you're just standing there unharmed....
If you're not fat:
- You get hit by a bicycle ... everybody runs over to you to check if you're ok first ...0 -
I lost weight to improve my quality of life. I was tired of feeling like crap all the time, tired of dodging cameras at social events (and tired of dodging social events), tired of wanting to be invisible, tired of doing all my clothes shopping online because I couldn't bear to try things on a fitting room, tired of allowing myself to be controlled by food, and yes, tired of intentionally staying out of the dating pool to avoid being rejected.
But losing weight changed me in ways I couldn't have fathomed back then. I am a better person now, not because I'm thinner but because demanding more FROM myself and FOR myself is now an ingrained habit. Sure, I am physically more attractive, and that most definitely has its upside. But I hope the man who is ultimately the beneficiary of that, whomever and wherever he is, will consider himself at a greater advantage because of the work ethic and problem solving skills and capacity for commitment that I have acquired through losing this much weight.0 -
I'd say sure I'm doing it to look good for other people, but that in itself is for me. I'm the one who feels good from compliments. But I am actually mostly losing weight for better health so the older I get, the better quality of life I'll have. Not that I want to live forever, but I wouldn't mind it being fulfilling and easier.0
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I'm doing what I do because I stepped on the scale one day, saw the number 408 and instantly knew what it was to truly loathe myself.
Yeah, as the fat comes off and the muscle gets more visible, I get more attention, both from my wife and others too. It's nice, but it's not why I'm doing it.
I'm doing this for me, because it's the one thing I can do for myself that no one else can take away from me...because I'll never again let myself get to that point of being out of control in the only two areas I really do control...my mind, and my body.0 -
I'm losing weight because I finally realized that I want it have a family some day and not being healthy will never be good for a pregnancy or a mom! I know that losing 100 lbs will be a slow process but I'm dedicated to my goal!0
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I have a few people/things:
I am doing this for the glucose monitor that always laugh when I go into hyperglycemia even when bolusing correct. I have noticed that, even if I am a T1, the ten pounds I have lost ontop of the weight lost from my diabetes has lowered my need for bolus insulin by almost 30%. Though, my meter laughs now when I am constantly going into hypoglycemia, but oh well, it's more sugar for me. :drinker:
I am also doing this for myself. I have been significantly overweight since I was 12, and with my diagnosis, I know that obesity can make glucose control more difficult and could then cause life-threatening complications to arise. I do not want to be somebody who loses her foot by the age of 30 because of poor glucose control. For years, I thought my weight was alright, but I had that horrible "what did I turn myself into" moment as I stepped onto the scale and saw that I was considered obese.
In a way, I also am doing this for the people who believed I deserved no respect because of my weight. Throughout middle school and high school, as my peers went out on dates and gawked about their boyfriends, guys would ask me out as a joke. It does hurt being eighteen and have never been on a date or been kissed. Tough these people are now out of my life, I wish to go back to that point eventually and prove to them that I still deserve to be respected, whether I am 120 or 220 pounds.
I also want to do this for my future children and grandchildren. I lost my grandfather, a beautiful soul who valued life, at a very young age because of heart issues. I do not want my weight to cause me to die early. I want to live a long life and, on the day I die, look back and say that I lived a beautiful life. I do not want to look back on being out of breath for walking up two stories of stairs at my old high school, or the worries of being able to sit in a desk or on a rollercoaster ride, or even the embarrassment of having to shop where my mother shops at.0 -
My trigger reason was work. I travel a lot for work and could only just do the seatbelt up on the planes. And I couldn't find anything to fit me in terms of office clothing.
However there were so many things that all just built up at about the same time:
1) Money - I couldn't afford more fat clothes, or all the binges that I was paying for.
2) Health - my dad recently had a stroke despite being really fit and healthy and that made me think that I'm reducing my chances of a long life even more by being obese. I was also always tired and unhappy and it made life so much harder to deal with.
3) Clothes - i had nothing left that fitted me and about 10 wardrobes worth of clothes in every size below mine.
4) Ambition - I want to move up quickly at work and in the man's world that I work in, being obese is going to distract people from all the things that I'm good at. Plus I want to wear awesome power suits to work.
5) Wedding - A couple of months after I started losing weight, I got engaged so now I want to make sure I don't look at my wedding photos with disgust because i want to remember it as the happiest day of my life.
6) Control - when my eating is out of control, my whole life goes out of control.
7) Boredom - I don't have any kind of social life at the moment and so I wanted to join a gym in order to meet people.
8) Breaking the pattern - I made a graph of my weight over the last 8 years and realised that I have been yo-yoing with an upward trend and I decided that enough is enough. I don't want to spend the rest of my life doing this.
Then, it was just like the stars aligned and everything fell into place and now I have no doubt that I will reach my goal size because I have so many good reasons to. I have never felt this strong and capable.0 -
It's totally for me. I knew what is was like to be fit and at a weight I liked - I starting running long distance running 10 years ago, lost 42 lbs and kept it off for years. In November 2012, I tore the meniscus in my left knee, while I was training for my first full marathon. Being a woman of a certain age, it took forever to convince a doctor that it was not just arthritis in my knee but a PROBLEM, so time dragged on and on and on.
I sunk into a quasi depression, I guess from the loss of the endorphin rush that dedicated long distance running gives you. I began to slip back into all my negative eating habits in a spirit of self-pity - "If I can't run, I may as well eat". Well, 15 months later I have finally reconciled myself to never being able to run again, so that cycle of self-pity is finished. Now I look at myself in the mirror and go OMG who is that person. Now I labor up flights of stairs in the metro that I used to run up. I'm fed up - I want the old, healthy and happy Debbie back. This is for me. PS have 30 lbs to loose.0 -
Ok, ok - yes, there IS a degree of seeking female approval in there!0
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So that people can accept me :sick:
All of them :frown:0 -
I think I can truly say that I am losing weight for myself. Most people say that I don't need to lose, as I already look like I am 20 lbs lighter than what the scales say (Thanks barbell training), but with my goals as a powerlifter, I need to drop a weight class or so in order to be more competitive, as most of the women in my current weight class are MUCH stronger than I am, since they are also much leaner.0
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I'm doing for my wardrobe... winter bulking made all my summer clothes tight/unwearable.0
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Everyone loses weight for different reasons. Some for health, some to make them look sexy, some for confidence. Even if society is making us think that skinny is pretty, and that may be wrong, but it does give people more confidence. At first I wanted to lose weight for my health/I wanted to look better. I went from 172 to 148 and was pretty happy with how I looked. However I need to get down to 126lb. this isn’t exactly for me its for my work, but its what I want to do and dieting is a small sacrifice. I do agree with you to some extent I thing if a 140lb woman wants to lose weight so people like her more its wrong, but if you are 18 stone, and that is mostly vfat then you really should do it for your health.0
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I first started losing weight for my family. There is a history of diabetes in my family and I couldn't stand my parents constant worrying that it would be passed on to me. Once I started losing weight, I kept at it for me as I discovered I liked being athletic and running and lifting and hiking. I'm planning on running my first race this summer and I know I wouldn't be able to do that if I were still at the same weight as when I started. My boyfriend liked me when I was fat and he likes me now, so it wasn't for him. And it's not for the media and all the pressure they place on women to look a certain way. I don't want my body to look that thin. So, I started for other people (my parents) but kept at it for me. I'm wondering who you're doing it for OP as you sound very angry and not like you want to do this at all.0
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So many interesting replies here... but, OP, let me ask you a question. Are you perhaps getting slightly demotivated? You are after the first "honeymoon" phase of losing when the pounds shed so fast and we're full of enthusiasm... Is it an endorphin drop?
Don't get me wrong, you have asked a very legitimate question. I am just asking because for me, when I was just too tired or frustrated to try, the whole "people should accept me as I am, it's my brains and heart that matter" thing was my best excuse for sabotaging my efforts.
All I am saying is, if that should be the case - hang on in there! There is nothing wrong with being valued for your heart, brains *and* looks, and whatever/whoever your motivator is, it all boils down to - do you *want* to stay as you were? If not, then whatever your motivation, you are still on the right track yo what ultimately *you* want.0 -
I have a strong tendency for type 2 diabetes in my family. I lost the weight not only to look and feel better, but really because I did not want that disease to strike me too, Constantly monitoring my blood sugar, injecting myself, UGH! I know it is under my control to prevent this, so I took control. Lost 12 pounds so far and I'm at a healthy weight now.
Being fat is more than not "socially acceptable," it's very unhealthy (but you knew that). Stay positive!
Michelle0 -
I did it to become a better motorcyclist. Now I'm down 135 lbs and way better.0
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To reply to the question though - for my health. Last year I lost my mum to cancer of the peritoneum. I have her physique. I don't want this happening to me, I want to live for my husband and daughter and sister, and for myself, I want to enjoy hikes again and learn to bike and skate. And, in the end, at 37 years and 108 kg I realized There is no one, no one who will "take care of me" or make my life better, if not me. As much as they love me, it's not in their power, it's in mine.0
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I cannot imaging losing weight for anybody else but me. I am the one who has to live with myself for the rest of my life.0
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I do it for me. I'm much more confident. I like me more.0
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3 weeks now. 3 weeks I've been weighing **** out and calorie counting. I've been jogging every day too. I feel great. I've lost nearly a stone. But I'm thinking who am I really losing the weight for?
Of course we all say 'it's for me' - but aren't we all doing it really so we feel sexy and acceptable? Acceptable to magazine ideals, to people we wish would love us if only we lost a few, etc...
It's all bull**** really, isn't it? We are the same however much we weigh - it's our minds and personalities that matter. Someone who is un-sexy and irritating at 18 stone will still be the same at 12 stone, there's just less of them to be irritated by?
Repost in three years...you will have answered your own question. :flowerforyou:0 -
I'm doing this to lower my risk of getting the health issues that have already affected my family -- heart attack, stroke, diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, etc... I'm doing this so my knees won't hurt when I walk, so I don't get tired walking across the street or up a flight of stairs... I'm doing this to have more energy, strength, endurance and an overall better quality of life. This is all for me.0
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I'm doing it for me.
I'm doing it so I look sexy... to what MY standard of sexy is FOR ME.
So I look acceptable... to what MY standard of acceptable is FOR ME.
So yup, I am actually doing it for me... REALLY.
The hell would I do it for anyone else? There's only one person I am guaranteed to live with for the rest of my life... MYSELF, and so that is the only person that must be satisfied with me - ME.0 -
I want to be fit enough to run away with the Doctor!
Seriously tho, it started as an experiment, just to see what my body was capable of (serious illness + ten years of using it as an excuse)
It's carried on because I love the attention it gets me, I love wearing the most inappropriate clothes because I am now concidered 'thin enough to get away with it'
Now I am head over heels with someone I don't want to allow my insecurities to ruin this so I need to feel as good about myself as possible.
Yeah, it's all pretty shallow. I was happy when I was big but this is way more fun!
You can flame me but at least I am honest, and to be fair, there are worse ways to address my constant need for attention than being a gym bunny!0 -
I woke up one day and realized that I wasn't caring for the vessel God gave me, and I feel ashamed.
I was given this body to serve him, and at the time I was well over 300lbs.
I realized I was no living the quality of life that was healthy for me, and I wanted to play soccer with my girl in
the back yard, and chase her around the house, I wanted to be the best I could for that little girl God trusted me with.
I also have a fiance that I'd like to keep up with, and I have plenty of family health scares to match the ones mentioned already on this thread. My daddy died at 56 due to diabetes. A really close friend at 44 died due to complications from weight issues.
So I am doing this for God, to show Him that I appreciate this life He gave me, and I am ready to be the vessel He needs.0 -
Well yeah I want to look good but it's more than just that though that sure doesn't hurt lol. When I take care of my health and keep my weight down I just feel so much better in general. I sleep better, I have more energy, I don't feel bloated and blah-like . I can have an active lifestyle and do things I enjoy like run, bike, hike because I'm fit enough to do them...and I take pride when I reach fitness goals and milestones. You bet I'm not going to be that girl who cant do a single pushup I'm going to be one cranking out 150 and running those 7 and under minute miles. Bring it on! Lol0
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