The Beautiful People
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I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
First, admiring someone's dedication and results =/= ingratiating oneself to them.
Second, if you have worked hard. Have you let people know about it? Have you put yourself out there? You have no picture so I'm wondering if you haven't gotten validation because you haven't told your story. 125lbs lost tends to get a REALLY enthusiatic reaction around here, whether you're at goal or still in progress.
Third, and not necessarily to you, is a statement I've always believed and MFP proves it more often then I'd like.
People want you to be successful, until you are.
^^ True dat!
Post your picture and be proud!0 -
Y'all need some cheese with all that?
With all of what exactly? Some people have been ashamed of themselves for so long it is intimidating for them to see photos of people that have the muscles and toned looks. There is nothing wrong with getting down as long as you don't stay there. Losing weight is emotional for some people and can be very difficult for others. We become very self focused and self aware and it's hard to see the forest through the trees.
But yeah....if you're offering...make it feta please!0 -
I have been having a converstaion over the past 2 days with a fellow MFP friend. I won't call him out, but I will say that in a way, the eye candy threads have kind of brought his mood down a bit. He mentioned that there are a bunch of beauitful people talking about how hot they all are. I am not one for pity parties and refused to let him stay there too long.
They're anonymous people on the internet. How do we know that's their picture? We don't.
And if someone needs to tell me how hot they are, they aren't hot. They're narcissistic asshats.
I have never heard the term narcissistic asshats, but I like it:laugh: That's as good as assbag!0 -
I use fit girls photos to motivate myself. However i remind myself, that you have your own beauty when you get fit, you won't look exactly like them. I think the singer Ciara, is yes a talented singer but also a fitness icon, to me. Hey, at least i'm not one of those girls who idolizes and envies the bodies of near death anorexic runway models. But yes I tell myself y her body is my fitsperation, but I will never be her and she will never be me.0
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I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
You are wrong. Neither person has intrinsic worth because of their physical appearance.
Although on the other hand, I would go out tonight but I haven't got a stitch to wear.
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"0 -
Am I the only one who has a Marilyn Manson song stuck in my head now??
Totally this - AND the 1980's Pantene commercial 'Don't hate me because I'm beautiful'.....................
Maybe you could 'morph' the two - and put Marilyn Manson in Pantene commercial................!0 -
Y'all need some cheese with all that?
With all of what exactly? Some people have been ashamed of themselves for so long it is intimidating for them to see photos of people that have the muscles and toned looks. There is nothing wrong with getting down as long as you don't stay there. Losing weight is emotional for some people and can be very difficult for others. We become very self focused and self aware and it's hard to see the forest through the trees.
But yeah....if you're offering...make it feta please!
I'll have pepperjack! And some Ritz! :bigsmile:0 -
Y'all need some cheese with all that?
With all of what exactly? Some people have been ashamed of themselves for so long it is intimidating for them to see photos of people that have the muscles and toned looks. There is nothing wrong with getting down as long as you don't stay there. Losing weight is emotional for some people and can be very difficult for others. We become very self focused and self aware and it's hard to see the forest through the trees.
But yeah....if you're offering...make it feta please!
I'll have pepperjack! And some Ritz! :bigsmile:
Extra sharp cheddar and some gorgonzola for me.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
You are wrong. Neither person has intrinsic worth because of their physical appearance.
Although on the other hand, I would go out tonight but I haven't got a stitch to wear.
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
This! I've got a ton of so-called "beautiful 6-pack people" on my FL and the reason I love them so much is that they know their intrinsic worth comes from within, while celebrating the hell out of what they have achieved. What they have achieved is an outer reflection of their inward beauty. I don't "kiss their butts" because of the way they look, and I don't derive any sense of worth directly from the fact that they or I look they way we do.
I'm still over 300 lbs, and I thump my chest proudly like a gorilla, because I've lost and kept off more than 50 pounds, and the scale weight decreases while my lifting weight increases. It's a reflection of my drive, and desire. Inside, I fit with my friends because they feel the same way about themselves. We're bad *kitten*. The fact that they are beautiful just makes them more fun to look at.
There are people who derive their sense of worth from the way they look, but they only have any power over the way you feel about yourself if you let them.
So let the eye candy people have their threads. It doesn't do away with what you have accomplished, or can accomplish. Hold your head up and keep working. If nothing else, just go and enjoy the view.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
You are wrong. Neither person has intrinsic worth because of their physical appearance.
Although on the other hand, I would go out tonight but I haven't got a stitch to wear.
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
This! I've got a ton of so-called "beautiful 6-pack people" on my FL and the reason I love them so much is that they know their intrinsic worth comes from within, while celebrating the hell out of what they have achieved. What they have achieved is an outer reflection of their inward beauty. I don't "kiss their butts" because of the way they look, and I don't derive any sense of worth directly from the fact that they or I look they way we do.
I'm still over 300 lbs, and I thump my chest proudly like a gorilla, because I've lost and kept off more than 50 pounds, and the scale weight decreases while my lifting weight increases. It's a reflection of my drive, and desire. Inside, I fit with my friends because they feel the same way about themselves. We're bad *kitten*. The fact that they are beautiful just makes them more fun to look at.
There are people who derive their sense of worth from the way they look, but they only have any power over the way you feel about yourself if you let them.
So let the eye candy people have their threads. It doesn't do away with what you have accomplished, or can accomplish. Hold your head up and keep working. If nothing else, just go and enjoy the view.
Hey. You are big, intimidating, manly, scary, eye candy.0 -
Instead of seeing what is on the surface, try to look beyond the muscles and the toned bodies and look at what that person did to achieve it.
It is worth pointing out how 99% of the headless picture people, the main people who show of their bodies, are the one's who swear up and down how easy it is. "Just eat at a deficit. Lift heavy."
Huh? :huh:
They're not saying it's "easy"...they're saying it's "simple"...and they're right.
(Okay, *now* I'm in...)0 -
I'm not shaming those who,work hard and got a rocking bod. I'm shaming those who that's all they have going on in their life. And if all you (not you personally, the generic you) can talk about is how hot you are, you are a narcissist.
that's pretty generic. How can you determine who's who? I put my pic on one of those threads, and I have a lot going on in my life. I've had to overcome quite a lot to get where I am in my life, personally, professionally, and physically. How do you know the difference between me and the next girl who posted a picture? I am proud of my body and how I look, does that make me a narcisssist? Do I have to tell you all I've achieved before you stop judging me?0 -
I'm a fatty and I posted in there. Own your worth.0
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So true.
Last year I was on the beach when a 30-something woman parked herself next to me. She took off her cover-up, and was sporting an awesome six-pack. She then grabbed the hand of her toddler and headed to the water.
It struck me in that instant that when I was heavier I would have thought how lucky she was, and how inadequate I was. Instead, I thought "You go girl... you worked your *kitten* off for it!"
love this
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I'm not skinny but I'm still beautiful. Other people can't make you feel bad unless you let them. As hard as it is people have to toughen up a bit and not let what others think affect how they feel about themselves. - Dance like nobody is watching.0
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I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
You are wrong. Neither person has intrinsic worth because of their physical appearance.
Although on the other hand, I would go out tonight but I haven't got a stitch to wear.
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
This! I've got a ton of so-called "beautiful 6-pack people" on my FL and the reason I love them so much is that they know their intrinsic worth comes from within, while celebrating the hell out of what they have achieved. What they have achieved is an outer reflection of their inward beauty. I don't "kiss their butts" because of the way they look, and I don't derive any sense of worth directly from the fact that they or I look they way we do.
I'm still over 300 lbs, and I thump my chest proudly like a gorilla, because I've lost and kept off more than 50 pounds, and the scale weight decreases while my lifting weight increases. It's a reflection of my drive, and desire. Inside, I fit with my friends because they feel the same way about themselves. We're bad *kitten*. The fact that they are beautiful just makes them more fun to look at.
There are people who derive their sense of worth from the way they look, but they only have any power over the way you feel about yourself if you let them.
So let the eye candy people have their threads. It doesn't do away with what you have accomplished, or can accomplish. Hold your head up and keep working. If nothing else, just go and enjoy the view.
Hey. You are big, intimidating, manly, scary, eye candy.
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I'm a fatty and I posted in there. Own your worth.
Yes! Own it! It's not about what you look like....it's about how far you have come.0 -
I have not read all the posts, so this may have been said. Many of the people who post pics of 6 packs or great glutes, or whatever, may not necessarily be that confident. A lot of people were overweight and suffered from body image issues - and a lot of them still do, even though to 90% of the people on here they have an 'after' body. Sometimes it takes a while for the mind to catch up, and sometimes the mind never does. I am sure that it does not help that they are actually the targets for body shaming much of the time on here. I suppose my point is, just because someone 'looks' confident in a picture, it does not mean that they actually are.
As a slight side note - it needs to be remembered that we all post the most flattering pics - the ones with the better lighting and angles, the ones first thing in the morning that do not show food bloat etc - when people see these pics, they should try to remember that. That is not to put anyone down as I put myself in the same group (the flattering pic group - not the beautiful people group for clarity) - just to try to keep it realistic.
Good post btw OP.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
I do not agree with this at all (or at least that it is the case the majority of the time). One of the most respected people (imo) on this site does not have visible abs. He has lost over 300lbs though and is extremely helpful and a truly nice person. He is respected for that and not 'worth less' than someone who does have visible abs...at all.0 -
I'm not skinny but I'm still beautiful. Other people can't make you feel bad unless you let them. As hard as it is people have to toughen up a bit and not let what others think affect how they feel about themselves. - Dance like nobody is watching.
uh, you might be one of the most beautiful people and should like win an award and stuff.... wait....
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I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
I do not agree with this at all (or at least that it is the case the majority of the time). One of the most respected people (imo) on this site does not have visible abs. He has lost over 300lbs though and is extremely helpful and a truly nice person. He is respected for that and not 'worth less' than someone who does have visible abs...at all.
^^ Totally!
For some people "visible abs" isn't even a goal at all. We should encourage others for reaching whatever their goals are, and continue to strive toward our own. But definitely let people know when you meet a goal! MFP members (generally) love to applaud everyone.
(I hope Somefitsomefat comes back and reads these responses :ohwell:)0 -
Don't like the threads? Don't participate. I'm sure everyone has some degree of self worth weakness in some areas that other people do not, depending on the attribute / skill / trait.
Just because you don't need that type of reinforcement about body image, doesn't mean other people won't benefit from those threads.
Now, since we're sharing here and all and being brutally honest..
Every time I post my pics in the lifting ladies threads (which I've cut down the frequency), I do feel a twinge of guilt, like I am being a little narcissistic without the right to do so.
I can kinda relate to both sides of the argument here. However, people in glass houses really shouldn't throw stones.0 -
What I take from this thread and some of the comments is that some people went through life extremely insecure and tend to view themselves in what society thinks is a hottie.
I personally believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder and guess have too much confidence to care what any of you think of me. lol
Then again I never was put down. Never was obese. Overweight, yes. But always got attention and compliments. Since I have never had those problems I cannot relate to others getting so down on themselves due to some person on the internet tooting they own horn. lol
Most times I just laugh because it doesn't bother me. Why should it. A lot of the times I do not agree with how they think of themselves because frankly, I tend to go for other types. I like my teddy bears, tall and with weight so goes to show you that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.0 -
Well said OP.
It is hard but we have to remember that we don't know all of what is going on in someone's life. We see a fraction and what they want us to see, even in real life. The same goes for self-confidence, sometimes you have to fake it until you make it.
I've had two low points in my life for my self-esteem/confidence. I wallowed for a bit and then I bucked up. I thought I was happy and attractive and forced myself to smile and find good until it became habit and eventually I actually believed it. I hope your friend is able to find his confidence.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
I'm sorry but your attitude and complete ignorance on this sucks. The only karma in play here is you having to live with your own demons.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
I'm sorry but your attitude and complete ignorance on this sucks. The only karma in play here is you having to live with your own demons.
I'm trying to remember if I've ever seen anyone kiss anyone's butt in here based on looks or such. No one's ever kissed my butt. I've always been just as supportive of the people who are halfway to their goal weight as I have to the people who are at their goal weight. And some people have great abs; that's cool, and I appreciate their hard work to get them. Some people don't and that's cool too; they've worked hard too, and I appreciate that work just as much,
It's pretty pett to act like everyone in these forums runs around congratulating all the "pretty" or "hot" people based on a few "chit-chat, fun, and games" forums. If you think that's the case you haven't really spent much time in the rest of the forums.0 -
I used to weigh 365lbs the first time around when I used MFP. I'm about 240 now (didn't gain anything back, just making another push to go lower). It was a lot of work for me to lose a whole person basically. However, all you have to do to completely discount all that work is put me next time an ab guy from one of those beautiful people threads. Some guy who's lost a couple pounds to go from mildly fit to more fit will always be worth more than the guy who's lost 125lbs until the second guy ends up with abs. I'm sure that's just some karmatic punishment for getting fat in the first place so I accept it. Kissing some pretty persons butt though because you think they've worked so hard is just silly though. I've worked hard too. I just didn't get the same result.
I'm sorry but your attitude and complete ignorance on this sucks. The only karma in play here is you having to live with your own demons.
I'm trying to remember if I've ever seen anyone kiss anyone's butt in here based on looks or such. No one's ever kissed my butt. I've always been just as supportive of the people who are halfway to their goal weight as I have to the people who are at their goal weight. And some people have great abs; that's cool, and I appreciate their hard work to get them. Some people don't and that's cool too; they've worked hard too, and I appreciate that work just as much,
It's pretty pett to act like everyone in these forums runs around congratulating all the "pretty" or "hot" people based on a few "chit-chat, fun, and games" forums. If you think that's the case you haven't really spent much time in the rest of the forums.
^^ Right!
Since I am happily married, I tend to avoid the "hot or not" type of threads anyway, so much of these opinions are lost on me.0 -
great post0
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Love your words, OP.
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I'm a narcissistic asshat but I don't tell people I'm hot.0
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