Throwing away a child's lunch?
Replies
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Objectively speaking, I can see the situation from the school's point of view, and I realize that the only way they can put pressure on the parents is through the kids.
Subjectively speaking though, from having been the "poor kid" in school, I can tell you that children are reminded of their parent's socioeconomic status in so, so many ways by their peers. It would be kinda cool if the administration tried to be neutral about it.
TLDR: I agree with the concept, but not the execution.0 -
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I want to know what kind of notification they gave those parents that the accounts were overdrawn? I realized my kid's was the other day. I had received NO notice of it.
That would piss me off. My daughter is only in kindergarten and her school uses an online site now for me to upload funds to and it sends me an email alert when it gets low. (at the amount I choose to be considered too low) But from what I heard this was the 1st year it has been in place. I wonder how they did it last year? Probably some sort of credit system and with sub-standard book-keeping and notifications being sent to be parents which resulted into adopting the online system. I love it. I can see even see what she buys with it. (for the record, she uses it for breakfast at school, I pack her lunch and afternoon snack)0 -
Blame the parents, not the school. It's not the schools responsibility.
Did you read the article?
This was the result of an unpaid balance was it not?
I see where you're coming from, I really do - but there is a right way to handle things and a wrong way. The wrong way is throwing a perfectly viable meal into the trash. The food obviously does not need to be financially accounted for if its going into the bin; so letting the child have it would not be as detrimental as it is to a child's psyche as letting them mentally equate their worth as being less than letting something go into the trash can.
It got the parents attention didn't it? I bet they won't forget to pay their tab again. These parents were too lazy to make their kids lunch everyday so paid for it to be provided by the school, then were too lazy to make sure there was enough money in their accounts and now they're mad at the school. Typical.
They are upset with the way the school handled it. As stated in previous comments, sometimes the school doesn't notify about a past due account until it's a large amount (as was my case with my daughter) They only just started to call the parents to notify them. If someone called me today and said "Send me $50" I would tell me to send me a bill first. They didn't just hand the kid food then take it away. They handed the kid food then THREW it away.
Why is it the schools responsibility to keep the parents up to date on their balance? The parents should take the initiative to always know. If this happened to my daughter I would simply say "I'm sorry you had to go through this, Mommy messed up" then proceed to tell her now lucky she is to have food period as some kids only ever get that fruit and milk.0 -
This would all be so much easier if you just give your kid money, like the old days. I guess there were problems with that too, but at least it's straight forward...you have the money for lunch, or you don't. If you don't, hopefully, you brought one. If you didn't bring one, and you don't have money, you borrow money from your friends. That's how it worked for me, and it was fine.
Exactly. My friends mother packed me a lunch everyday because my mother couldn't always afford to send me to school with one. I wasn't "humiliated" I was grateful.0 -
Why is it the schools responsibility to keep the parents up to date on their balance? The parents should take the initiative to always know. If this happened to my daughter I would simply say "I'm sorry you had to go through this, Mommy messed up" then proceed to tell her now lucky she is to have food period as some kids only ever get that fruit and milk.
I agree with you on this. I keep up with how much I have sent to school with my children. The only thing they can buy is breakfast and lunch, so for me, it really isn't a problem.0 -
Blame the parents, not the school. It's not the schools responsibility.
Did you read the article?
This was the result of an unpaid balance was it not?
I see where you're coming from, I really do - but there is a right way to handle things and a wrong way. The wrong way is throwing a perfectly viable meal into the trash. The food obviously does not need to be financially accounted for if its going into the bin; so letting the child have it would not be as detrimental as it is to a child's psyche as letting them mentally equate their worth as being less than letting something go into the trash can.
It got the parents attention didn't it? I bet they won't forget to pay their tab again. These parents were too lazy to make their kids lunch everyday so paid for it to be provided by the school, then were too lazy to make sure there was enough money in their accounts and now they're mad at the school. Typical.
They are upset with the way the school handled it. As stated in previous comments, sometimes the school doesn't notify about a past due account until it's a large amount (as was my case with my daughter) They only just started to call the parents to notify them. If someone called me today and said "Send me $50" I would tell me to send me a bill first. They didn't just hand the kid food then take it away. They handed the kid food then THREW it away.
Why is it the schools responsibility to keep the parents up to date on their balance? The parents should take the initiative to always know. If this happened to my daughter I would simply say "I'm sorry you had to go through this, Mommy messed up" then proceed to tell her now lucky she is to have food period as some kids only ever get that fruit and milk.
Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.0 -
The schools are somehow affiliated with the state? Why can they not send those people a letter saying you pay or we take your tax return....becuase you know they get one.While I don't agree with taking away a lunch they already have in hand, I can see the schools side as well. My mom works for a local school district and they have families that owe over a thousand dollars in lunches. Some of the families with the highest bill are upper middle class families that should be able to pay for the lunches, but don't because they know the district won't deny the kids a hot lunch.
There's also small claims....schools I believe are able to do this.....colleges can for unpaid tuition. The school needs to get thier money. Yes. But keep feeding the kids. It's very likely that school lunch as nasty as some claim it can be, can also be the best or only meal a child gets.
Schools need to not play a victim in ^ situation.
The district my mom works for always gives the kids a hot lunch no matter what the parent owes, but that created the huge debt problem. The parents that don't want to pay know their child will be fed the lunch anyway so why pay. The school does try to collect from the parents, but they will only take it so far when the child is still in the school system to not create issues like the one this school is facing by their poor choice to try to get parents pay.0 -
Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.
If you don't have time to ensure your child is being fed then what DO you have time for? Seems to me that should be a priority. You can't rely on other people when it comes to something like that.0 -
Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.
If you don't have time to ensure your child is being fed then what DO you have time for? Seems to me that should be a priority. You can't rely on other people when it comes to something like that.
That was hypothetical. .....my daughter packs her lunch now.
It isn't that feeding a child isn't a priority, but some people have situations that occur beyond their control that make feeding their child difficult. Not only that, but being a full time single mom, 2 kids and 3 jobs, my focus is feeding my kids in general (not necessarily is the money in the account/is there enough credit). My point is, if a school is going to give credit, then they need to also send a bill for the balance on a regular basis.0 -
I find it funny that prisoners pretty much get a free lunch, but not school children...
In any regard, I would be beyond livid.0 -
They're not "throwing away a chil'd lunch" they are denying him/her a free lunch. I'm sorry there are parents out there that are irresponsible, but if they can't afford a lunch, pack a lunch. Apply for food assistance.
If it is truly an oversight, no child is going to starve to death missing one lunch and, if it is a recurring problem, then it falls to the parents to get their act together.
I'm sorry some people can't afford to support their children and I,m sorry the children have to suffer, but I'm not all that crazy about supporting their poor choices.
Not only does the actions of the school make me sick but so does this response. The children have no control over the actions of their parents. They should not be punished. If the food was already distributed and then going in the trash, let the child eat...and add it to the parents bill. No child should suffer with an empty stomach for any reason and no child should suffer this humiliation. I truly think you miss the point. Imagine if this was your child. As a parent I struggled to support 4 small children. I did it and they never went without a lunch. If I seen this, I would pay for all 40 children to have lunch. This is just sickening to me. Where is the compassion in this country anymore?0 -
I read this and was appalled- to waste the food i/o having the kids eat it is quite a moral crime.
A hungry belly will not help the child learn.
The school should send bills to the parents, but if the food will be wasted, why not give it to the child? This is sad, we claim to be the land of plenty yet we act this way towards the poor. it sucks, I hope this is fixed.0 -
Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.
If you don't have time to ensure your child is being fed then what DO you have time for? Seems to me that should be a priority. You can't rely on other people when it comes to something like that.
That was hypothetical. .....my daughter packs her lunch now.
It isn't that feeding a child isn't a priority, but some people have situations that occur beyond their control that make feeding their child difficult. Not only that, but being a full time single mom, 2 kids and 3 jobs, my focus is feeding my kids in general (not necessarily is the money in the account/is there enough credit). My point is, if a school is going to give credit, then they need to also send a bill for the balance on a regular basis.
I meant "you" as in anyone who doesn't have time, not you specifically. There are resources for families who are not able to feed their children. I would assume that the parents who can't afford to feed their children wouldn't be the ones participating in the lunch program, but the ones sending their kids to school with bread and jelly instead. I don't think the parents not being able to afford to pay their tab was the issue here, it was their lack of responsibility and "time" as you said.0 -
I want to know what kind of notification they gave those parents that the accounts were overdrawn? I realized my kid's was the other day. I had received NO notice of it.
Exactly!
AND....
Many times my kids have forgotten to give me things from their school. Lunch notices, pictures, report cards... you name it, it's been forgotten by one kid or the other. They get home, toss their book bag to the side and forget about it (if they have no homework) until they pick it up to leave the next morning!
The biggest problem in the whole story is that the food had already been given to the children, to take it away and THROW IT AWAY is beyond ridiculous. :grumble:0 -
Welcome to the Tea Party!0
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Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.
If you don't have time to ensure your child is being fed then what DO you have time for? Seems to me that should be a priority. You can't rely on other people when it comes to something like that.
That was hypothetical. .....my daughter packs her lunch now.
It isn't that feeding a child isn't a priority, but some people have situations that occur beyond their control that make feeding their child difficult. Not only that, but being a full time single mom, 2 kids and 3 jobs, my focus is feeding my kids in general (not necessarily is the money in the account/is there enough credit). My point is, if a school is going to give credit, then they need to also send a bill for the balance on a regular basis.
I meant "you" as in anyone who doesn't have time, not you specifically. There are resources for families who are not able to feed their children. I would assume that the parents who can't afford to feed their children wouldn't be the ones participating in the lunch program, but the ones sending their kids to school with bread and jelly instead. I don't think the parents not being able to afford to pay their tab was the issue here, it was their lack of responsibility and "time" as you said.
Is that all you see is the fact there was an irresponsible parent here? Because of these actions, children were not only not allowed to eat, they were embarrassed. Put yourself in the children's shoes. How would you feel? Humiliated? Embarrassed? Yes they were given milk and fruit. I am sure that went unnoticed by other children. discretion should have been used if the lunches needed to be taken away. I could care less if the account had no money in it because the parents couldn't afford it or they forgot. I could care less if the school tried to contact the parents and couldn't. What I care about is the children! As if bullying and taunting is not already a problem in schools, these children have to deal with this type of crap. Totally unacceptable in my book.0 -
Because parents aren't perfect either. The schools have a system where they are giving credit for food...therefore they should be sending out bills to parents on a regular basis. I have made plenty of mistakes, but I also have a lot on my plate. I can't remember everything all the time. If I can't just send my daughter to school with money then I would expect that there was a notification process for the account.
ETA- It is the job of the parent AND the school to work together to ensure that a child's needs are met.
If you don't have time to ensure your child is being fed then what DO you have time for? Seems to me that should be a priority. You can't rely on other people when it comes to something like that.
That was hypothetical. .....my daughter packs her lunch now.
It isn't that feeding a child isn't a priority, but some people have situations that occur beyond their control that make feeding their child difficult. Not only that, but being a full time single mom, 2 kids and 3 jobs, my focus is feeding my kids in general (not necessarily is the money in the account/is there enough credit). My point is, if a school is going to give credit, then they need to also send a bill for the balance on a regular basis.
I meant "you" as in anyone who doesn't have time, not you specifically. There are resources for families who are not able to feed their children. I would assume that the parents who can't afford to feed their children wouldn't be the ones participating in the lunch program, but the ones sending their kids to school with bread and jelly instead. I don't think the parents not being able to afford to pay their tab was the issue here, it was their lack of responsibility and "time" as you said.
Actually no. The issue was that this person at the school went on a power trip and pulled a move that could have been rather traumatizing to a young child. It's not just time either, it's the reminder. For example, I have a credit card that needs to be paid, therefore I get a bill. This same concept should apply on a regular basis for parents.
In my case, for example, had I known that my daughter was feeding her friends early on, I would've stopped it before the bill became as high as it did. I packed her lunch, I sent it to school with her, why would I need to check her account balance?
I agree that the parents are responsible to pay the bill, but not at the expense of humiliating a child. Ever.0 -
Is that all you see is the fact there was an irresponsible parent here? Because of these actions, children were not only not allowed to eat, they were embarrassed. Put yourself in the children's shoes. How would you feel? Humiliated? Embarrassed? Yes they were given milk and fruit. I am sure that went unnoticed by other children. discretion should have been used if the lunches needed to be taken away. I could care less if the account had no money in it because the parents couldn't afford it or they forgot. I could care less if the school tried to contact the parents and couldn't. What I care about is the children! As if bullying and taunting is not already a problem in schools, these children have to deal with this type of crap. Totally unacceptable in my book.
There are two different types of parents, those who coddle and those who prepare their children for the real world.
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Anyone who would take food out of a child's hand and throw it away should not be working in a school. I don't care who gave the order to do so.
Agree. 100%.0 -
It seems to me that if the child already has gotten the tray, it makes more sense, financially and morally, to let the child charge the meal and eat it instead of throwing it in the garbage. From personal experience, I think schools need better systems for notifying parents that the account is over drawn. You would think, in the age of technology, that this task would be simple. I just don't believe that telling my 8 year old daughter that she needs to let me know her account is empty is an adequate form of parental notification. Of course, she won't think to tell me until the next time she needs lunch. Also, don't give a note directly to her. Those get washed in the washing machine. The school already has an automated system that calls and sends email for school closings, delays, etc. They can't modify this program to send me an email when her lunch account is empty?0
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Actually no. The issue was that this person at the school went on a power trip and pulled a move that could have been rather traumatizing to a young child. It's not just time either, it's the reminder. For example, I have a credit card that needs to be paid, therefore I get a bill. This same concept should apply on a regular basis for parents.
In my case, for example, had I known that my daughter was feeding her friends early on, I would've stopped it before the bill became as high as it did. I packed her lunch, I sent it to school with her, why would I need to check her account balance?
I agree that the parents are responsible to pay the bill, but not at the expense of humiliating a child. Ever.
My kid would not feel humiliated, but annoyed with me for forgetting. It's happened before on pizza days, where I forgot to pay and the whole class got pizza, but she didn't. Then I wrote my local paper and complained that my kid was humiliated, oh wait no I didn't.0 -
Is that all you see is the fact there was an irresponsible parent here? Because of these actions, children were not only not allowed to eat, they were embarrassed. Put yourself in the children's shoes. How would you feel? Humiliated? Embarrassed? Yes they were given milk and fruit. I am sure that went unnoticed by other children. discretion should have been used if the lunches needed to be taken away. I could care less if the account had no money in it because the parents couldn't afford it or they forgot. I could care less if the school tried to contact the parents and couldn't. What I care about is the children! As if bullying and taunting is not already a problem in schools, these children have to deal with this type of crap. Totally unacceptable in my book.
There are two different types of parents, those who coddle and those who prepare their children for the real world.
I'm not seeing your connection with coddling. I don't coddle my children, however if I am going to teach them to respect others then I would absolutely be pretty ticked off with the way this situation was handled. At the age these children were, they don't understand money, but they certainly understand how to treat others.0 -
Actually no. The issue was that this person at the school went on a power trip and pulled a move that could have been rather traumatizing to a young child. It's not just time either, it's the reminder. For example, I have a credit card that needs to be paid, therefore I get a bill. This same concept should apply on a regular basis for parents.
In my case, for example, had I known that my daughter was feeding her friends early on, I would've stopped it before the bill became as high as it did. I packed her lunch, I sent it to school with her, why would I need to check her account balance?
I agree that the parents are responsible to pay the bill, but not at the expense of humiliating a child. Ever.
My kid would not feel humiliated, but annoyed with me for forgetting. It's happened before on pizza days, where I forgot to pay and the whole class got pizza, but she didn't. Then I wrote my local paper and complained that my kid was humiliated, oh wait no I didn't.
This wasn't one child. This was 40. This also wasn't a pizza day that you had been told about...and how were you told? Were you given a notice of some sort? How many days notice were you given? Was it more than 12 hours?0 -
Is that all you see is the fact there was an irresponsible parent here? Because of these actions, children were not only not allowed to eat, they were embarrassed. Put yourself in the children's shoes. How would you feel? Humiliated? Embarrassed? Yes they were given milk and fruit. I am sure that went unnoticed by other children. discretion should have been used if the lunches needed to be taken away. I could care less if the account had no money in it because the parents couldn't afford it or they forgot. I could care less if the school tried to contact the parents and couldn't. What I care about is the children! As if bullying and taunting is not already a problem in schools, these children have to deal with this type of crap. Totally unacceptable in my book.
There are two different types of parents, those who coddle and those who prepare their children for the real world.
I'm not seeing your connection with coddling. I don't coddle my children, however if I am going to teach them to respect others then I would absolutely be pretty ticked off with the way this situation was handled. At the age these children were, they don't understand money, but they certainly understand how to treat others.
Coddling our children because I do not want them humiliated? Mistreated or embarrassed? Gees...anyone who thinks its ok to do this to a child is sick. I did prepare my children for the real world without humiliating, mistreating or embarrassing them.0 -
Does anyone know, how many kids go to school to have a warm meal each day? Thousands- its an epidimic in my town.
I know this is no one else responsibility, but this is just humiliating to the child.
our public schools arrange drop off meals in the summer so kids dont starve.0 -
Coddling our children because I do not want them humiliated? Mistreated or embarrassed? Gees...anyone who thinks its ok to do this to a child is sick. I did prepare my children for the real world without humiliating, mistreating or embarrassing them.
lol I'm not sick I just see things differently. I feel confident that my child would not feel humiliated in this situation, because what is there to be humiliated about?
Should the poor children who only ever get the fruit and milk feel humiliated and embarrassed every single day? I mean, how embarrassing for your child to have to feel like one of them for ONE day!!0 -
Coddling our children because I do not want them humiliated? Mistreated or embarrassed? Gees...anyone who thinks its ok to do this to a child is sick. I did prepare my children for the real world without humiliating, mistreating or embarrassing them.
lol I'm not sick I just see things differently. I feel confident that my child would not feel humiliated in this situation, because what is there to be humiliated about?
Should the poor children who only ever get the fruit and milk feel humiliated and embarrassed every single day? I mean, how embarrassing for your child to have to feel like one of them for ONE day!!
I am considered lower class but that doesn't mean my child should have to feel like that. It also doesn't mean I am going to "act" low class. If it had been my child in this situation it would embarrass her because she is a very sensitive child. I often tell her to suck it up butter cup, but that isn't in front of her peers. To already be poor and then have that reaffirmed is horrible for any child. In the case of this school we don't know why or how the accounts went over due. All we know is that they weren't paid, the parents had hours notice, then the food was thrown away.
It IS humiliating to have food you are hungry for, taken away, and thrown in the trash in front of you. That is something that could stick with a child for the rest of his life, and not in a positive way.0 -
Coddling our children because I do not want them humiliated? Mistreated or embarrassed? Gees...anyone who thinks its ok to do this to a child is sick. I did prepare my children for the real world without humiliating, mistreating or embarrassing them.
lol I'm not sick I just see things differently. I feel confident that my child would not feel humiliated in this situation, because what is there to be humiliated about?
Should the poor children who only ever get the fruit and milk feel humiliated and embarrassed every single day? I mean, how embarrassing for your child to have to feel like one of them for ONE day!!
I am considered lower class but that doesn't mean my child should have to feel like that. It also doesn't mean I am going to "act" low class. If it had been my child in this situation it would embarrass her because she is a very sensitive child. I often tell her to suck it up butter cup, but that isn't in front of her peers. To already be poor and then have that reaffirmed is horrible for any child. In the case of this school we don't know why or how the accounts went over due. All we know is that they weren't paid, the parents had hours notice, then the food was thrown away.
It IS humiliating to have food you are hungry for, taken away, and thrown in the trash in front of you. That is something that could stick with a child for the rest of his life, and not in a positive way.
Low income does NOT mean low class. (I presume you meant low income? If not, my apologies. But i still say class is not determined by income)
The majority of the posters here agree that removing food from a child at lunch is reprehensible. If i had been working at the school and instructed to do that i would have paid for the lunch myself rather than do that.
You sound like a caring mom. Ignore the newbies who are bored. Some people have no empathy for others.0 -
I don't like kids, and I still would never take food from them because their parents didn't pay for it. Hell, I wouldn't even take food away from an adult who hadn't paid their own bill. I would, however, refuse to serve an adult (but not a kid) who hadn't paid or pay for them if I could. But throwing it out once they already have it? Pointless, wasteful, and mean.0
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