As a guy I wanted to know what it was like as a woman...
Replies
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If women lose access to online dating (or simply opt out due to the foolishness) don't (heterosexual) men, but default, lose access as well?
Yes, that is exactly the point I was making.
The behaviour of a minority of men (mainly though some women are guilty of the same to a lesser degree) crowd out both other men and women who may be eminently suitable for each other. It benefits all of us to call out this behaviour as being unacceptable and remedy the situation because as an avenue in the modern world online dating is probably the best way to go.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
not this girl. I'm not a fan of getting drugged.0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.0 -
One final thing before I have to go.
This is an interesting article applying economic principles to the idea that online dating creates "a market for lemons".
http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2012/02/love-stinks-an-economic-manifesto/253064/0 -
I honestly think it might depend on what site you use.
I was on Match.com a little over a year ago, for a very brief time, about 3 weeks actually. I chatted with several men and never got creeped out by anyone, but only met up with one for coffee. Our coffee date lasted 7 hours and over a year later we are still going strong.
Who knows, maybe my face says don't eff with me, but all in all, my one and only online dating experience was a positive one.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.
*does the kid n' play foot dance with you*0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
that's exactly what it was - the term "house party". It reminded me of Kid N Play.
Ahhh...my baby brother was into those guys. He used to run around saying "Pajama jammy jam." I have no idea what that meant. I'm not sure he did either. :laugh:
But, yeah. Trade the crap music for rock and add 20-30 years to the folks, and that's not too far off from our parties. My husband and I usually split once certain people start getting too drunk.
Now, is it strange that our two teens sit at home on FB and Tumblr or watch a movie and eat pizza while their parents are at a house party? Maybe I'm over-sharing by now. :laugh: :smokin:0 -
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
Getting free drinks is great.
Now comes the hard part. Ever accept a free drink from a guy in a bar? Accepting the drink means an obligation to talk to them and give them a chance. Blow them off and you are a rude b*tch and likely to get yelled at, spat on, or pushed. They bought you something, now you owe them something and if you don't give it to them watch out.
Sound crazy? It is. But it's how accepting drinks in bars works.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.
*does the kid n' play foot dance with you*0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Maybe it's not my age then. Maybe it's a regional thing? *shrugs*
I've never called it a "get-together." And to me "having people over" is more like a small dinner party. I'm talking about 40-50 people, loud music, kegs and coolers, lots of smoke in the backyard (or in the garage if it's winter...) To me, that's a house party, a party at someone's house. :bigsmile:
see, that's what we did at 18. *shrugs*
See, if my parents had let me party at 18, I might have outgrown this behavior. :blushing:0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.
*does the kid n' play foot dance with you*
Nah, I just super perved her. Sorry, as a guy, I cannot control myself.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
The two hours that girl put into her hair and makeup have some questions about you mean by "no effort."0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Maybe it's not my age then. Maybe it's a regional thing? *shrugs*
I've never called it a "get-together." And to me "having people over" is more like a small dinner party. I'm talking about 40-50 people, loud music, kegs and coolers, lots of smoke in the backyard (or in the garage if it's winter...) To me, that's a house party, a party at someone's house. :bigsmile:
see, that's what we did at 18. *shrugs*
See, if my parents had let me party at 18, I might have outgrown this behavior. :blushing:
there was no "letting" about it. I got my *kitten* handed to me for that. It was worth it, lol.0 -
Maybe it's not my age then. Maybe it's a regional thing? *shrugs*
I've never called it a "get-together." And to me "having people over" is more like a small dinner party. I'm talking about 40-50 people, loud music, kegs and coolers, lots of smoke in the backyard (or in the garage if it's winter...) To me, that's a house party, a party at someone's house. :bigsmile:
That sounds like a normal night at home to me.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.
*does the kid n' play foot dance with you*
Nah, I just super perved her. Sorry, as a guy, I cannot control myself.
hahahahaha *snort* hahahahaha. You didn't super perv me. You made me laugh. I was actually going over the dance in my head. Its been a few years, lol.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
not this girl. I'm not a fan of getting drugged.
^^ THIS
Back when I was single and going to bars, this was rule #1: NEVER take a drink from a stranger and NEVER leave your drink unattended.0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.
"virtual sexual assault" is a little epic, isn't it? Typically, a sexual assault cannot be stopped with a "block" button.0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.
"virtual sexual assault" is a little epic, isn't it? Typically, a sexual assault cannot be stopped with a "block" button.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
The two hours that girl put into her hair and makeup have some questions about you mean by "no effort."
whoa! 2 hours?!? Holy crap, they're doing it wrong. Or, maybe I am. I would never take 2 hours to get ready. I can be fully ready in under an hour, including shower, full hair and makeup and outfit. Good gravy.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Everytime I see the words "house party", I think about kid n' play
glad to see I'm not the only one who thought that.
*does the kid n' play foot dance with you*
Nah, I just super perved her. Sorry, as a guy, I cannot control myself.
hahahahaha *snort* hahahahaha. You didn't super perv me. You made me laugh. I was actually going over the dance in my head. Its been a few years, lol.
My buddies and I could never exactly pull it off. We always missed the part where you turn around and touch the bottoms of your feet.0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.
"virtual sexual assault" is a little epic, isn't it? Typically, a sexual assault cannot be stopped with a "block" button.
^^ she has a point. While some think that is acceptable behavior, most do not.0 -
Single folks don't use phones, don't go to parties at their friends' houses
Of course they do. At least in my circle, they do. I have friends from 22 years old to 60 years old. Many of them are single. My daughter and her group of friends are in college.
I have people over to my house all the time and my friends have people to their houses. Whether it's for the Super Bowl, Halloween or a random, "Hey, we haven't seen each other in a while!" Friday night.
Who are these people who never go to each other's houses?
IDK...It was stated earlier in the thread that only teenagers go to house parties. It seems strange to me. That's my main "social life" is house parties.
Maybe it's not my age then. Maybe it's a regional thing? *shrugs*
I've never called it a "get-together." And to me "having people over" is more like a small dinner party. I'm talking about 40-50 people, loud music, kegs and coolers, lots of smoke in the backyard (or in the garage if it's winter...) To me, that's a house party, a party at someone's house. :bigsmile:
see, that's what we did at 18. *shrugs*
See, if my parents had let me party at 18, I might have outgrown this behavior. :blushing:
there was no "letting" about it. I got my *kitten* handed to me for that. It was worth it, lol.
:drinker:
I waited until I was "OUT OF THIS ******* HOUSE" :laugh:0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.
"virtual sexual assault" is a little epic, isn't it? Typically, a sexual assault cannot be stopped with a "block" button.
^^ she has a point. While some think that is acceptable behavior, most do not.
True, it's not "assault" exactly, but definitely sexual harassment, imo.0 -
Wahhhhhhh!!! Too many guys want to buy me free meals!!!! Life as a woman is soooooooooo difficult. Let's be honest, you ladies have to put literally no effort in to meeting guys. You're basically just waiting for one to hit on you that meets whatever shallow standard you've imposed for looks. You then simply decide if his annoying qualities offset his looks and by how much.
I was single for about 3 months this summer and it was miserable. I remember being single 4-5 years ago and not being so uncomfortable.
This last year- was AWFUL. And this was with people I already knew- not complete strangers.
My dating experience online a few years ago wasn't that bad- but it isn't pretty... and no- it's not easy.
I didn't get free meals- or take advantage of men- or just waiting for them to hit on me. I'm not a meat market getting to picked up.
that's just so incredibly inaccurate it's not even funny.
Guy and a girl walk in to a bar. Which one is probably getting at least a couple free drinks from strangers? Just sayin'. Meeting someone is easy when you have to put no effort in to striking up a conversation.
Free drinks are not the gift you seem to think. They come with a expectation for many senders - there is a sense of obligation that you must now at least engage in small talk with the buyer, which is an unwelcome imposition if you are just there trying catching up with a friend or some other specific purpose. I politely decline when a stranger offers to buy me a drink; however I will certainly buy my own and talk to them if they seem interesting and we are already having a good conversation. But sometimes they don't ask - they just send one over and then there's that awkward moment of negotiating how to say "Thank you but I am not interested" or "You seem nice, but I am kind of tied up right now" without seeming like a big jerk.0 -
tl;dr whole thread, but... Years ago, I created a male profile online for a similar experiment. My alter ego could post the exact same thing that got me slobbering compliments and PMs... and he would be completely ignored by that online community. The difference is pretty interesting. Kind of bummed me out at the time to think I might not be as objectively witty as I thought. :ohwell:
I want to point out I said this exact thing earlier and it was dismissed LOL. Hopefully coming from a woman the statement will actually carry some importance.
"virtual sexual assault" is a little epic, isn't it? Typically, a sexual assault cannot be stopped with a "block" button.
^^ she has a point. While some think that is acceptable behavior, most do not.
Well we can't just run around pulling our junk out IRL. *shakes head* silly women.0 -
The big take away from your rant is that only attention from certain types of guys is welcome. Yeah, I get flat out rudeness and extremes like living with your parents are unattractive but an unwillingness to converse with someone because they're "on you're level" is narrow minded. You see this in real life too. If a hot guy leers at you at a bar it's flirting. If an ugly guy does it he's being creepy. There was even a post about this recently somewhere. It was by a women who lost a lot of weight and suddenly started getting attention. She talked about how great it was that young guys at the gym were looking her over but how uncomfortable she was by the guys that did it at the gas station. Sorry we're not all male models ladies. It happens.
No one cares about how you look. Do you think all women are engaged to someone who's good looking or intelligent or rich or whatever you think it's valuable? The world is FULL of normal people who are engaged or married. If you're still thinking about this you're only giving yourself a shallow justification about why a woman shouldn't want to meet a man.
If a man I've never met tried to flirt with me I would find it creepy no matter how he looks. He doesn't know me. If he was really interested in knowing me he could start off a normal ****ing conversation. But notice how this doesn't EVER happen and that's why girls are suspicious about men trying to randomly approach them.0
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