Skinny people who think they know better...
Francl27
Posts: 26,371 Member
So I just got into an argument online with some skinny woman who's never had a weight problem in her life basically saying that all I know about weight loss is wrong and I'm giving horrible advice.
Gotta love it.. We all know someone like this, don't we?
Gotta love it.. We all know someone like this, don't we?
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Replies
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Yah I have people like that in my life...
I remember one of them saying to me I know how to lose weight...I am an expert at it.
I said yes you are..that is why you have lost the same 10lbs over and over again.0 -
Hate hate hate that....just because I'm bigger than you doesn't mean I haven't done my research and don't know what I'm talking about...it just means I'm still in the midst of my struggle...0
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Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.0 -
Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.
Crossed to the dark side?????0 -
Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.
She's healthy and has healthy eating habits. That's why it bothered me actually... I don't think someone who has always had healthy eating and exercising habits is the best person to give her opinion about weight loss, when she probably has no idea what it's like to love calorie-heavy food, have binge issues etc.
But apparently, because I've learned most of what I know from MFP, it's wrong too. Whatever...0 -
That's why I keep mum IRL about my weight, eating healthier and exercise because of all the resistance I encounter. I would rather get the support and advice from people who have BTDT than to have some person who's never had issues their entire life give me a lecture on how I'm "doing it wrong."
A variety of factors changes your weight and determines how people lose weight. Age and genetics are two things we cannot change. We can all change our activity levels, nutrition, and overall lifestyle. The basics tend to work for everyone but the details don't, and I think people try to insist their details work for everyone and they don't.0 -
Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.
She's healthy and has healthy eating habits. That's why it bothered me actually... I don't think someone who has always had healthy eating and exercising habits is the best person to give her opinion about weight loss, when she probably has no idea what it's like to love calorie-heavy food, have binge issues etc.
But apparently, because I've learned most of what I know from MFP, it's wrong too. Whatever...
Actually. someone with healthy habits would probably have some good advice to offer. Why are you dismissing it just because she's never had a weight problem?
I've never had a significant weight problem, but took the time to educate myself on nutrition and exercise. I do have good advice to offer. Honestly, if people choose to dismiss it because of my weight... they're wrong.0 -
Some skinny girls weren't always skinny and know the struggle, some skinny girls sit on top of the world and wonder why day people can't just be thin. Like it just never crossed their minds. Like how some rich people don't understand why the poor don't just buy more money. There are people who don't appreciate hard work because they've never been subjected to it.0
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I am assuming that you have known her all her life? People look at me and yea I am thinner now but I wasn't always. Thin or "skinny" is also subjective. Have I personally ever been obese, no. Have I had struggles with weight gain and trying to make myself healthier, yes. Just because someone is thin doesn't mean they haven't had there own struggles. They may have been different than yours, but it doesn't make them any less knowledgeable or unable to give advice.
The great thing about advice is that you can either take it or leave it. So if you don't personally agree with what shes told you- than take it with a grain of salt and move on.
I do take a slight offense to you saying "skinny people who think they know better" - so its okay to label someone because they are thin but what if the reverse were stated? It shouldn't be about her weight.0 -
Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.
She's healthy and has healthy eating habits. That's why it bothered me actually... I don't think someone who has always had healthy eating and exercising habits is the best person to give her opinion about weight loss, when she probably has no idea what it's like to love calorie-heavy food, have binge issues etc.
But apparently, because I've learned most of what I know from MFP, it's wrong too. Whatever...
Actually. someone with healthy habits would probably have some good advice to offer. Why are you dismissing it just because she's never had a weight problem?
I've never had a significant weight problem, but took the time to educate myself on nutrition and exercise. I do have good advice to offer. Honestly, if people choose to dismiss it because of my weight... they're wrong.
^ This. Especially since maintenance is more important, and more difficult, than losing weight. The people who have "always been thin" or "always healthy" are that way because they're doing something to maintain that way.0 -
So I just got into an argument online with some skinny woman who's never had a weight problem in her life basically saying that all I know about weight loss is wrong and I'm giving horrible advice.
Gotta love it.. We all know someone like this, don't we?
In all fairnes we're just reading one side of the argument so it's kinda hard to say whether she is wrong and you are right or vice versa.0 -
But apparently, because I've learned most of what I know from MFP, it's wrong too. Whatever...
Don't lift that, you'll get bulky
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Haha I see your point. But she believes that people should listen to their hunger/full signals... I don't believe it's accurate for someone who has weight issues from eating high calorie foods all the time, as they could be full after eating 35% under their TDEE once they start eating better and it's not healthy... hence why I think she's not the best person to give advice in these circumstances.0
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Just asking....
Do you think shes never had a weight problem because she watches her diet and works out? I used to be a skinny gal until I wasnt, lol. Ate what I wanted and stayed thin. When I turned 28 things changed. Anyway, my point is, when I realized I had crossed over to the dark side I started to work out. I saw all the skinny girls really working out hardcore. I thought to mysef "why are they here, they are skinny". I came to realize they were skinny because they were working for it and always had.
Crossed to the dark side?????
Oh SNAP!0 -
Haha I see your point. But she believes that people should listen to their hunger/full signals... I don't believe it's accurate for someone who has weight issues, as they could be full after eating 35% under their TDEE and it's not healthy... hence why I think she's not the best person to give advice in these circumstances.
I mean...at some point you will, I assume, listen to your body's signals on hunger/fullness. I would hope that being here on MFP is giving you an idea of portion size, helping you learn the difference between actual hunger and boredom/stress caused hunger, and yes even giving you an idea of actual fullness.0 -
Haha I see your point. But she believes that people should listen to their hunger/full signals... I don't believe it's accurate for someone who has weight issues, as they could be full after eating 35% under their TDEE and it's not healthy... hence why I think she's not the best person to give advice in these circumstances.
I mean...at some point you will, I assume, listen to your body's signals on hunger/fullness. I would hope that being here on MFP is giving you an idea of portion size, helping you learn the difference between actual hunger and boredom/stress caused hunger, and yes even giving you an idea of actual fullness.
Oh definitely!0 -
I think the real problem you are having is with anyone who "thinks they know better". Sometimes, you probably "think you know better" and that is why people reject YOUR advice, whether right or wrong. No one likes being told things which (in their opinion or in a general sense) are inaccurate or condescending, or make you feel judged or defensive (again, whether it's reality or not).
No, not everyone can listen to their hungry/full signals as a key to weight loss, or maintenance, or what ever. Does it work for some people? Probably. Does the integrity of her advice have anything to do with her being skinny? Not really.
Fitness opinions from MFP, scholarly articles, broscience, or some skinny girl -- it's all of the opinions are like *kitten* variety. Take what is useful for you, roll your eyes when you know you're right, and continue to share when it seems valuable to do so.0 -
So I just got into an argument online with some skinny woman who's never had a weight problem in her life basically saying that all I know about weight loss is wrong and I'm giving horrible advice.
Gotta love it.. We all know someone like this, don't we?
you assume that because she's never been overweight that she doesn't know how to get in shape?0 -
I had a fun back and forth with a guy I never met on facebook after his comment of:
"I see obese people in the lifting area, they really need to get on a treadmill".0 -
I had a fun back and forth with a guy I never met on facebook after his comment of:
"I see obese people in the lifting area, they really need to get on a treadmill".
Aw hayl naw0 -
O M G. If we all had a nickel for the times skinny people had the right answer on what to do to be skinny, we'd be better off than Fort Knox!!0
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"But she believes that people should listen to their hunger/full signals... "
She is both right and wrong! The goal will be to be able to listen to your body and also from the start on, you should watch out whether you are really hungry or maybe you are bored or stressed out etc (there are hundreds of reasons to eat!)
But if you expect it from the very beginning, it'll propably go wrong. It's something you have to (re)learn!
One year ago, I ate double the portion sizes I eat today (and they are "normal" now). Because I had NO feeling of "being full" at ALL!
I would try to rely on obejctively "normal" portions (not too little!!) and try to get used to it. It's mostly a matter of habit, really!
I do get why you were annoyed by her advice. I think her advice would/will be good if you are near your goal weight and/or want to maintain your weight. But she is NOT the right person to get advice from if you just started because as you said, she won't be able to give advice to common struggles like 'right portion sizes' 'what to eat'. Because while it's a matter of habit for her to take 50g of noodles and 200g vegetables and a small piece of meat and it'd be a normal, delicious meal in her eyes, it'd be a total restriction for someone who is used to 200g noddles with fatty sauce and extra cheese!
Even though there is the same goal, you have to approach it differently. Don't be too mad because she doesn't get your struggle; try to use the advice that is helpful to YOU and continue informing yourself on a neutral basis
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Some skinny girls weren't always skinny and know the struggle, some skinny girls sit on top of the world and wonder why day people can't just be thin. Like it just never crossed their minds. Like how some rich people don't understand why the poor don't just buy more money. There are people who don't appreciate hard work because they've never been subjected to it.
Some girls are skinny, have never been overweight, and are still aware of how people get overweight, and understand their struggles.0 -
Why the qualifier "skinny" is necessary in this context is a bit beyond me. I would think unsolicited advice from an inexperienced individual, skinny or otherwise, would be equally as unwanted. Just mah $0.02.0
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So I just got into an argument online with some skinny woman who's never had a weight problem in her life basically saying that all I know about weight loss is wrong and I'm giving horrible advice.
Gotta love it.. We all know someone like this, don't we?
Well, what do you "know" about weight loss and what kind of advice are you giving out?
I don't judge advice on the physique of the person giving it, skinny or not.0 -
Haha I see your point. But she believes that people should listen to their hunger/full signals... I don't believe it's accurate for someone who has weight issues, as they could be full after eating 35% under their TDEE and it's not healthy... hence why I think she's not the best person to give advice in these circumstances.
But hunger signals are all dependent upon hormones, and a person whose hormones aren't in balance will not have reliable signals. People who eat too much, their hormones are signaling eat more and the hormone that signals fullness does not shut off correctly. People who eat too little, their signals are saying I can't eat any more I'm full even if they have not reached enough for proper nutrition.
She is correct, for someone who doesn't have imbalanced hormones, but she doesn't realize that they do not work the same way for everyone.0 -
So I just got into an argument online with some skinny woman who's never had a weight problem in her life basically saying that all I know about weight loss is wrong and I'm giving horrible advice.
How do you know she's wrong?0 -
Read the rest of the thread, lol!0
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I don't think someone who has always had healthy eating and exercising habits is the best person to give her opinion about weight loss, when she probably has no idea what it's like to love calorie-heavy food, have binge issues etc.
You are jumping to some pretty unsupportable conclusions there....the fact that someone *can* control their urges does not mean they do not have strong urges!
Considering that the way to lose weight and maintain the weight loss is precisely "healthy eating and exercise habits" - yeah, seems to me that's a pretty solid person to listen to.0
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