Do you agree with this statement?
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"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?
Depends what you want more. Junk food and no exercise, or being fit and healthy.0 -
lol yeah, everybody wants to lose weight but no one wants to diet or exercise (except weightlifters. those people actually enjoy working out) If it were that easy, everybody would be ripped0
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Something I discovered over many years of "dieting" when we have that mindset for many of us we hear the word diet as DEPRIVATION and some of us get very stubborn and do not want to be deprived.
The best thing I ever did for myself was stop dieting
I now do my very best to eat clean, its not easy to do and I don't manage 100% but I am completely aware of what I am eating and how much and that makes a big difference.
I have helped several friends get started with a few tricks
the first is make one small change every 2 days the changes you make are:
no more soda, no more white foods, no more takeout every day
my first small change was the size of my plate, from dinner sized to sandwich sized, im sure the first few days i loaded that plate with as much as i could have put on a dinner plate but it made me SEE what I had in front of me
the next small change was to cover 1/2 the plate with vegetables and eat them first
the next small change was to leave a bite of food on the plate, very hard to do lol but it is a good thing to learn
when you start by making small changes you dont feel so deprived you dont make a big sudden change that will leave you feeling hungry and frustrated
i also made sure that if i wanted a big mac i had a big mac and before i knew it i didnt want that big mac anymore, knowing i can have anything i want helps me make the better choices
especially once i started exercise, i sure didnt want to put out all that effort only to wast it eating crap
even if you dont want to WORK to lose the weight, you can make one small change every day, every other day or every week until you find you are eating better
choosing a healthy liefestyle will make you feel so amazing that once you start you wont want to stop and you will never DIET again0 -
"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?
I mean this in the kindest way possible, but yes, I absolutely do believe that statement.0 -
"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
I understand what she is trying to say, but I don't think "want" is quite the right word. "Need" might be a better word - many people "want" to lose weight, but most of them fail because deep down they don't feel they *have* to lose weight. It's not about "wanting" it - it's about wanting it bad enough.
Basically, the day you put down the fork, push back from the table, and stay away from the table is the day you're ready. And no diet plan in the world - short of being physically restrained from accessing food - is going to work until you are ready.0 -
actually IMO..your mom is not wrong..getting fit is HARD WORK! losing weight (fat and muscle) can actually be easy if you have the will power to eat a lot fewer calories..getting fit means working to get better cardiovascular and lifting to strengthen those muscles that you already have.Try tricking yourself like this,it works for me on the days I really dont want to do anything,(you know,those PMS days) I make a deal with myself to do only 10 minutes of a workout,lifting or cardio whichever it may be that day,,and at the end of the 10 minutes if I REALLY dont want to continue I dont..I have always finished what I had planned that day and often times I do a little extra..plus if you are walking,biking anything that takes you away from home,keep going until you really dont want to anymore,because you still have to get home,,it is a mind game to help push yourself.I lift and do lots of cardio..I love biking and running/walking long distances,like 10-20 miles at a time,3-4 days a week when the weather is good,I hate micro managing things,therefor this works for me because if I burn 1000 cal biking,I dont care if my calorie are over by 2-300 for that day.I hate tracking things so much I very seldom weigh myself,,as long as my clothes are fitting and I can buy smaller sizes once in a while,and keep up with my black belts in TKD air wise,,I am a happy camper.0
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I think that statement will be true for some people and false for many.0
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"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?
How do we lose weight? Calorie deficit!! Sooooo....(and it always pains me to say this)....NO EXERCISE REQUIRED!! In fact....(oh boy this really hurts)....healthy food is not a requirement either. I'll revisit exercise and healthy food in a bit. Basically all that is required for you to lose weight is to stay in calorie deficit. So if MFP gives you 1400 calories a day....Then consistently eat 1400 calories a day for the foods you like. LOG EVERYTHING honestly and accurately!!!!!!
Exercise - I love it! Everyone should be doing it!!! In all the ways there are to move your body I can't believe that a person can't find something they like - dance walk jog skip hop swim yoga bike zumba hike volleyball bowling weights kettlebells jumprope trampoline rollerblade move move move. BUT........you can still lose weight without exercise, so there are no excuses there.
Healthy Food - of course it's a no brainer, healthy food is healthy for you. I could preach to the choir forever here. BUT - it's not a requirement to lose weight.
Bottom line - CALORIE DEFICIT.0 -
I think that Mom is basically right..............
You DO have to WANT it -
You have to be willing to change your eating habits (if they are poor) -
Logging EVERYTHING on this site will make you realize soon enough if your eating habits are poor or not.
You also have to be willing to sweat a little (GLOW, if you don't like the word SWEAT) if you want to really reap the rewards of health and a toned body...........
After awhile, it all becomes rote - a habit like brushing your teeth or putting your seatbelt on - you start to realize the foods you need to choose, and that an hour of exercise a day won't kill you (heck, you may even come to LIKE it)!0 -
I think it has a lot to do with finding healthy things you WANT to eat and finding workouts you WANT to do. It shouldn't be so much about forcing something. You can't force yourself to eat things you don't like and do things you don't like all day every day. That's not sustainable. You need to figure out what people are eating and try new things. It's highly unlikely that you just don't like anything healthy. There are plenty of healthy things you probably like (and love) you just have to learn how to prepare them. Working out is a little trickier. Finding an activity you love to do that burns calories is not easy, but there are probably activities you can find that you don't hate quite as much as others. The more you try, try, try the more you'll find that you love. Once you find what you love, there's no more battle. GOOD LUCK and YES YOU CAN!0
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I agree with your mom. When you really and truly want something, you do the work to get it. Plain and simple. If you feel like doing the work is too hard and refuse to do it, you want to stay as you are more than you want to lose weight."You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?0 -
"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?
I mean this in the kindest way possible, but yes, I absolutely do believe that statement.
I believe there will be ups, and downs, and diets tried and diets failed, and diets that work for awhile, but then changes in direction, but yes, overeall, over the span months, years, you will lose weight if your heart is truly set on it.
You will find a way.
Humans are capable of a level of greatness and achievement most people can't even fathom, if you want something bad enough, you will get it.
I've been at this for almost 2 years since my last stint, currently at a 59 lb loss.
It's not easy, and it's a slow process.0 -
What have you gotten from life that you haven't had to work in some way for? Maybe for you so far it has not seemed like work in the same way that eating and working out seems, but believe me you will have to work for what you want out of life. Sometimes it's hard work, sometimes it is a constant struggle, and some times you make better choices to surround yourself with support that makes whatever it is you are going through easier.
This process seems daunting to you right now. Decide to make a small change in this regard that doesn't seem hard to you. Keep that change going and add something else to it in a week. When it seems too hard, really take a look and see if there is a way to either think about it differently or to find support to help you through it.0 -
Some people find this advice helpful so I'll just throw it out there:
Pretend you are a robot. Know what you have to do and do it like a robot would. Eventually it will get easier.
(Kind of like "fake it 'til you make it")0 -
Your mom is right - I will just change one word - "you do not want to lose the weight ENOUGH..... If you really want it, you will make peace with the basic facts that eating healthier and moving is part of the deal - and will be part of your life if you want to keep the weight off...
I was in the same boat - I was whining and complaining about wanting to lose weight, hating myself for the way I looked and "trying everything" The day I accepted that the only way I will lose the weight and keep it off require healthier eating and moving, was the day I succeeded.....0 -
I agree wholeheartedly.
"Change Occurs When The Pain Of Staying The Same Is Worse Than The Pain Of Change". is my favorite quote,
You DONT want to lose weight (atleast not more than you want to continue to eat junky food and not work out).
I have never heard this quote before, but I love it. It's absolutely the truth in everything in life- not just weight loss.0 -
I think the clarity comes with realizing that you can't do it half-assed and there are no quick fixes. It requires commitment and a complete lifestyle overhaul. I know in my case something profound has changed in me and I'm feeling different towards food and exercise, have kept up my healthy habits for several months and am seeing the results of my hard work.0
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I go through cycles. Sometimes I really want it and work for it.
The rest of the time I may not want it as badly, but I fake it until I make it.
In other words, just start. Stop stressing about your reasons. Pretend you like it, and eventually you will.
If you fake it long enough, you will start to crave the moments when the scale goes down. You will feel "off" if you don't make it to the gym or get in a walk or ride your bike. You will feel "off" if you overindulge on high calorie treats instead of using moderation.
The first time I went to a gym, I hated it. I got on a stationary bike and buried my face in a Glamour or something for 20 minutes and then had a smoothie. But I went back the next day, and the next, then I started to mess around on the weight machines. Then I started to think hard about fitness. Then I started reading about free weights and lifting. Then I picked up a barbell and realized that 45 pounds wasn't nearly as heavy in my hands as in my mind. Now I'm 60 pounds lighter, 10 times stronger, and a million times happier.
The first time I decided to eat less was similar. I didn't like lettuce, but I ate it. I didn't like leaner cuts of meat, but I ate them. I hated brown rice....and I still hate brown rice and don't eat it.0 -
I agree wholeheartedly.
"Change Occurs When The Pain Of Staying The Same Is Worse Than The Pain Of Change". is my favorite quote,
You DONT want to lose weight (atleast not more than you want to continue to eat junky food and not work out).
I totally agree with the above statement. I actually considered having lap-band surgery. When I went to the seminar the doctor preceded to tell me I didn't qualify (as per insurance) since my BMI was only 38 not the required 39. I was very blunt and stated I could gain the extra weight to qualify or meet with his dietitian and find a healthy way to loose the weight. That was the best 30 min of my life. Even though I have lost weight successfully in the past It was an eye opener to all of the things I was doing wrong that held me back. I set a date to start loosing weight and moved forward from there.
Good luck to you on your journey.0 -
"You're not losing weight because you don't want to. When you really want to lose weight, you will."
My mom keeps saying this to me. IMO, it's not that I don't want to lose weight. It's that I don't want to work out or eat healthy. I've been struggling with that since I was 15. I do want to lose weight, but the working part is the hard part.
Follow up question:
When will I know that I want to do it? Is it like having an epiphany? Or do people just force themselves to do it until they want to?
Why are you here? :huh:0
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