Smugly overweight??
ariant23
Posts: 161 Member
Ok - I'm looking for some "no, you're not crazy" here. And I totally don't mean to offend anyone. But I had this conversation with my husband the other day and he said I was crazy. I'm about 30 lbs. overweight, but outside of the concept of portion control, it's because I'm an awesome cook. I make great bread, baked goods, amazing sauces, roasts, etc. and I make almost all of it from scratch. We go through tons of butter, eggs, flour, potatoes, sugar, etc. I love to cook, I love making big meals for my little family of 4, and it's even more exciting when I can show it off. I'm a stay-at-home mom, I feel like you should get a 5-star meal if you come over for dinner. and that's not to say we don't eat out some times, and I don't stock some junk food, but mostly, if I eat it, I made it.
To the I'm not crazy point, I feel like my fatness is "more ok" that someone who did it with eating out or prepared foods from the grocery store. I realize it's completely stupid, but that's the thought I have when I debate adding a pat of butter to finish a sauce and make it shiny (which is why you add a smidgen of butter at the end). AND because I make so much from scratch, it's a huge pain to count calories because only a few things come with "reliable" labels as we go through tons of produce and protein. So when i do count my calories, it adds tons of time to my food prep (3 meals and 3 snacks a day for my very skinny and active girls).
Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
To the I'm not crazy point, I feel like my fatness is "more ok" that someone who did it with eating out or prepared foods from the grocery store. I realize it's completely stupid, but that's the thought I have when I debate adding a pat of butter to finish a sauce and make it shiny (which is why you add a smidgen of butter at the end). AND because I make so much from scratch, it's a huge pain to count calories because only a few things come with "reliable" labels as we go through tons of produce and protein. So when i do count my calories, it adds tons of time to my food prep (3 meals and 3 snacks a day for my very skinny and active girls).
Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
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Replies
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Personally It does not matter to me how I got fat, whether from homemade food or restaurant food. Point is, I ate too much of it, all of it. Fat is fat, no matter where it came from.
I am worth the time it takes me to log everything I eat. At this point in my life it is what I have to do to keep up with my new lifestyle.
I realize it may take you a little extra time to log everything when you cook as you do for a family, but it is up to you to decide whether it is worth it or not.
Good luck in your journey.0 -
I'm glad you like to cook. It's great way to nurture your family and show them that you love them. However--and you're not crazy, just making some wrong conclusions--there are ways to do this that are healthier for you and your husband and kids. Lots of "butter, flour, sugar, eggs" just aren't healthy. Try a new assumption--you can make really fantastic meals which nurture your family, AND make these meals extremely healthy at the same time. Get a few cookbooks from the library which are about making delicious foods which use whole grains, lots of fruits and veggies, and less "white " foods. And include your kids in the cooking process, so that they can learn how to appreciate really good food. Thirty pounds isn't the mark of a great cook; it's the mark of a person who is eating inappropriately. It isn't going to go away by itself--I've been there, and now have almost 50 to lose.0
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I'm a barely passable cook and still packed on the pounds, lol.
Doesn't matter how they got there.
I totally get you on the difficulty in logging portions and such when cooking from scratch. I do OK with lunch and snack because I just make it for me but at night when I'm busy and making a meal item from scratch - very hard to do.0 -
You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight0
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If carrying around that 30 pounds isn't bothering you and you are happy with your lifestyle, well. . . leave it at that. Why did you join MFP?0
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Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
There's lots of us out there like you-pretty much any of us can find a way to rationalize what we do or don't do. But your husband is also right.
While you may say that you are overweight because you are a stay at home mom who is a great cook, you'll find the exact opposite: those who feel they are overweight because they are single moms who can't cook or feel too exhausted to cook and have to rely on drive thru or take out (that is also not often labeled or portioned correctly.)
If the weight loss was important enough, the time it takes to calorie count wouldn't stop you. (That's not a judgment, weight can't always be the # 1 priority in life.) As someone who is already a good cook, it's hard to imagine it adding that much more time. You could even go the route where you learn what a serving size is by appearance (deck of cards, your fist, etc) and arrange your plate that way.
All that said, it's not the worst thing in the world if you are a great cook who likes her own food. So instead of being smugly overweight, maybe you can be comfortably or contentedly overweight? Or something.0 -
I think that from a weight standpoint, it's a calories in/calories out thing…but from health perspective, 30 lbs. overweight from eating a great diet is going to be a lot different long term than someone who's packed full of empty calories and deficient in micronutrients. It's important to remember that a person can be obese and malnourished (and people commonly are here in the U.S. these days, particularly teen-agers).
I'm in your camp. I'm also a fat foodie, and in order to lose weight, I've started eating a lot more limited diet, because it's difficult to accurately count calories in complex recipes. That said, my husband bought me a scale, and I'm going to start trying to work it out…because once you get the facts on a recipe…you have it forever. I get where you're coming from about altering recipes on the fly, but I figure I'll get close enough. Good luck on your weight loss journey. 0 -
I'm a fantastic baker, not to shabby in the kitchen, make tons of homemade food for my family but I'm overweight because I eat too much, period. I don't think it matters how I got here. I need to make changes.
So no, I don't have any pride in eating to much of my homecooked food for my extra pounds.0 -
I understand having a sense of pride about food that you've taken the time to prepare from scratch. My husband and I have always liked to cook, and I run a small cake business out of my house, so I know how you feel. Making quality, from-scratch food items is very important to me, and I gained weight because I love food - I love to make it, I love to serve it, I love to eat it.
But I guess I never really thought about whether or not it was somehow better that I got fat from food I made myself. And thinking about it now, I don't think it is better. The result would have been the same no matter how I got there. I was heavy, physically uncomfortable, and stuck in a body that couldn't do what I wanted it to. Before, I had no concept of portion size, especially when it came to calorie dense foods like cheeses, oils, and butters. Now that I do, I make my food with even more care, and I appreciate it even more - not only for how it tastes, but for what it can do for my body.
I still use things like oils, cheeses, butter, flour, and sugar, but now I use them in more appropriate portions. If I have a recipe that I make somewhat often, I take the time to weigh and measure out the ingredients and enter it as a recipe on MFP so that I can log it over and over again without much trouble. It does take a little time to get the hang of counting calories, especially when it comes to fresh foods, but as someone else mentioned, I'm worth it. I was happy to enjoy my food when I was obese. But I'm happier to enjoy my food AND know that my body is strong and capable. Learning that I can have both has made all the difference.
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You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight
this.
The winning trick is to be able to do all that good cooking, be a weight you're comfortable and happy with, all while still enjoying what you've cooked.
I know quite a few stellar cooks on MFP and am glad to call them my friends.
ETA, I am also a great cook.0 -
Bottom line?
You eat more than you should. Just like most of the rest us on MFP.0 -
diabetes cares about visceral fat, how it got there is irrelevant.
It is somewhat smug to assume your fat is better than the next persons, but everyone has these things about them. You can continue creating masterpieces with as much cream and butter as you can, but that just means you can eat less of it. Alternatively you can start omitting the pats of butter that makes the sauces shiny and the various other things and see whether people notice. You don't need to drastically change everything, but little things do make a difference long term.
I cook and bake too all the time as my son is anaphylactic to dairy and I just logged one recipe per day and now I have almost everything I cook in here. I also noticed that most of my recipes amount to between 250 and 300 cals a portion, so if it all fails I can enter those as quick cals and add rice or pasta to it and be done with it. Is it perfect? No, but it's okay to do it once in a while.0 -
Paula Deen is a fantastic cook as well. Now she is battling Diabetes. Just sayin.0
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Ok - I'm looking for some "no, you're not crazy" here. And I totally don't mean to offend anyone. But I had this conversation with my husband the other day and he said I was crazy. I'm about 30 lbs. overweight, but outside of the concept of portion control, it's because I'm an awesome cook. I make great bread, baked goods, amazing sauces, roasts, etc. and I make almost all of it from scratch. We go through tons of butter, eggs, flour, potatoes, sugar, etc. I love to cook, I love making big meals for my little family of 4, and it's even more exciting when I can show it off. I'm a stay-at-home mom, I feel like you should get a 5-star meal if you come over for dinner. and that's not to say we don't eat out some times, and I don't stock some junk food, but mostly, if I eat it, I made it.
To the I'm not crazy point, I feel like my fatness is "more ok" that someone who did it with eating out or prepared foods from the grocery store. I realize it's completely stupid, but that's the thought I have when I debate adding a pat of butter to finish a sauce and make it shiny (which is why you add a smidgen of butter at the end). AND because I make so much from scratch, it's a huge pain to count calories because only a few things come with "reliable" labels as we go through tons of produce and protein. So when i do count my calories, it adds tons of time to my food prep (3 meals and 3 snacks a day for my very skinny and active girls).
Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
If I do say so myself, I am a pretty damn fine cook. I kept the weight off with my own cooking with portion control. I like my own cooking but I ate small portions of it - that's really the key. You can like what you make - just a sensible amount of it.0 -
Boom.You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight0 -
You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight
yerp.0 -
I'm a bit of a wine connoisseur, myself. It's been over a decade since I've tasted from a bottle less than $15.
Sure, I get drunk and beat my wife and kids, fight cops when I drink, and have a slew of DWIs - - but the important thing is that because I drink better booze, I'm not as bad as those other drunks.
This comparison brought to you by the letter J and the number 3.0 -
Ok - I'm looking for some "no, you're not crazy" here. And I totally don't mean to offend anyone. But I had this conversation with my husband the other day and he said I was crazy. I'm about 30 lbs. overweight, but outside of the concept of portion control, it's because I'm an awesome cook. I make great bread, baked goods, amazing sauces, roasts, etc. and I make almost all of it from scratch. We go through tons of butter, eggs, flour, potatoes, sugar, etc. I love to cook, I love making big meals for my little family of 4, and it's even more exciting when I can show it off. I'm a stay-at-home mom, I feel like you should get a 5-star meal if you come over for dinner. and that's not to say we don't eat out some times, and I don't stock some junk food, but mostly, if I eat it, I made it.
To the I'm not crazy point, I feel like my fatness is "more ok" that someone who did it with eating out or prepared foods from the grocery store. I realize it's completely stupid, but that's the thought I have when I debate adding a pat of butter to finish a sauce and make it shiny (which is why you add a smidgen of butter at the end). AND because I make so much from scratch, it's a huge pain to count calories because only a few things come with "reliable" labels as we go through tons of produce and protein. So when i do count my calories, it adds tons of time to my food prep (3 meals and 3 snacks a day for my very skinny and active girls).
Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
It's all about health to me. How is your blood work? I can't imagine eating that way every day could be healthy for you and your family but if you are then what does our opinion matter?0 -
You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight
this.
The winning trick is to be able to do all that good cooking, be a weight you're comfortable and happy with, all while still enjoying what you've cooked.
I know quite a few stellar cooks on MFP and am glad to call them my friends.
ETA, I am also a great cook.
this…
I cook too and am a pretty good cook, and I come from an italian family so I like to eat "good" food. However, I just eat less of all the good stuff that I like and make sure that I am in a deficit…
I guess it comes down to what is a priority. Do you want to eat good, but a little less AND lose weight. Or do you want to eat a lot of good food, and remain overweight? Only you can make that decision … I prefer the best of both worlds…eat less and be 12% body fat ...0 -
I'm a bit of a wine connoisseur, myself. It's been over a decade since I've tasted from a bottle less than $15.
Sure, I get drunk and beat my wife and kids, fight cops when I drink, and have a slew of DWIs - - but the important thing is that because I drink better booze, I'm not as bad as those other drunks.
This comparison brought to you by the letter J and the number 3.
LOL that is a bit of an over the top analogy…but I see what you did there…well played...0 -
I think if you go and add your recipes to the recipe maker you won't have to spend hours a nite entering everything.
I am with others ... you have got to want to lose the weight in order lose the weight.
You are a stay at home mom...I like the suggestion of going to the library and get some healthy cooking books and see how you can change up your recipes for everyone's benefit.
You can do this...your mindset needs adjusting before it will work.
Best of luck!!!!0 -
I make bread every single week, cook all of my own meals (I'm a good cook), and I've managed to lose more weight than I ever thought I would.
Think portion control. To lose weight you don't have to give up cooking or the foods you love, you just have to have healthy boundaries around food and food scale nearby. Oh, and don't forget to log too. :bigsmile:0 -
If carrying around that 30 pounds isn't bothering you and you are happy with your lifestyle, well. . . leave it at that. Why did you join MFP?
^^^^Yeah. Not sure why you would try to rationalize an unhealthy weight acceptance on this particular message board. Did you really think that you would get a lot of love for the fact that you're eating unhealthily (no matter who is making it), while teaching your children to eat the same way? In 20 years, do you want to look your 30 pound overweight "bolas de queso" in the eye and proudly tell them that their obesity is your doing? I didn't. That's why I'm changing my ways.
Instead of all that butter, flour and eggs, why not try to make healthier versions of those rich, fat-, sugar-, white flour- and calorie-laden foods?0 -
<<<<<<<<< got fat eating mom's homemade cooking. Overweight is overweight IMO. I just knew I had to change.0
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What you are saying is 100% ridiculous. I can't believe you would even post something like this-your husband is correct.0
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I think I'm missing something here. I'm not sure what you're husband is saying you're crazy about. I think a few people touched on this above, if you're a great cook, you probably have a natural gift towards how to prepare things, how things are going to taste. Someone with your ability should be able to put that talent towards making healthy foods. Healthy can be just as tasty as foods that aren't so healthy. There's always cookbooks that are put aside from others that are healthy. Even look at vegetarian cookbooks. They have some great healthy recipes and you don't have to be vegetarian to like them. Just give it a go and try. You have nothing to lose and much to gain.0
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You're trying to rationalize why you're overweight
Can't say it any better than this. ^
I am also a stay-at-home mom and do quite well in the kitchen. I also bake, and cook, for other people than just my family.
Just because I became overweight eating homemade goods doesn't make it any less unhealthy to be overweight.
Yes, logging from-scratch meals takes a bit longer... However, a lot of people have success doing so. Me included. I weigh, measure, and log everything I put into a recipe. Doing so has made it so I'm not obese anymore, and am 4lbs away from a "healthy" weight and BMI. I have a TON of recipes on my MFP diary that I've created due to it not being available as a search option. It is possible!0 -
I'm a bit of a wine connoisseur, myself. It's been over a decade since I've tasted from a bottle less than $15.
Sure, I get drunk and beat my wife and kids, fight cops when I drink, and have a slew of DWIs - - but the important thing is that because I drink better booze, I'm not as bad as those other drunks.
This comparison brought to you by the letter J and the number 3.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
Ok - I'm looking for some "no, you're not crazy" here. And I totally don't mean to offend anyone. But I had this conversation with my husband the other day and he said I was crazy. I'm about 30 lbs. overweight, but outside of the concept of portion control, it's because I'm an awesome cook. I make great bread, baked goods, amazing sauces, roasts, etc. and I make almost all of it from scratch. We go through tons of butter, eggs, flour, potatoes, sugar, etc. I love to cook, I love making big meals for my little family of 4, and it's even more exciting when I can show it off. I'm a stay-at-home mom, I feel like you should get a 5-star meal if you come over for dinner. and that's not to say we don't eat out some times, and I don't stock some junk food, but mostly, if I eat it, I made it.
To the I'm not crazy point, I feel like my fatness is "more ok" that someone who did it with eating out or prepared foods from the grocery store. I realize it's completely stupid, but that's the thought I have when I debate adding a pat of butter to finish a sauce and make it shiny (which is why you add a smidgen of butter at the end). AND because I make so much from scratch, it's a huge pain to count calories because only a few things come with "reliable" labels as we go through tons of produce and protein. So when i do count my calories, it adds tons of time to my food prep (3 meals and 3 snacks a day for my very skinny and active girls).
Is there anyone out there like me? or is my husband right?
Ok, I am with you on this, my friends call me a food freak because I make EVERYTHING from scratch (in the winter I buy tomatoes sauce-the only packaged thing I buy-, in the summer I use tomatoes from my garden). I love to cook gourmet food for my family of 3 and I am very concerned with the a balanced nutrition. I buy mostly organic foods and our family NEVER steps foot in a fast food place, we do not drink soda or have any junk food in the house (chips, cakes, candies, etc). Now, that being said I am 15lbs overweight and very unhappy about it. The truth is (just like some else said In a post) even the best homemade, organic, healthy food can make you fat...and fat is fat no matter what (that is what I see when I look in the mirror and I hate it).
I am so frustrated, because I feel like I have to choose between my family and my myself. If I stop cooking I know I could lose some weight, BUT my family would eat bad foods and I would feel guilty. So hard....0 -
I LOVE to cook. And I have been told that I am fantastic at it......
And I still cook and my husband still loves it and doesn't even realize it's "diet food"
But you can maybe rationalize it anyway you want but the end game is still the same...0
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