I need a new husband

kytte
kytte Posts: 323 Member
in Chit-Chat
Old one has been buggy since the day I got him. Constantly spits out errors, never works right when I want him to, gets worse with every update...

Specifically tonight he belittled my weight loss efforts in front of his entire family, and no one said a word.

Can I get an upgrade?

(Okay trolls, have fun. I really need the laugh tonight.)
«1345

Replies

  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    IN! Oh wait..
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    Have you considered an upgrade to boytoy 2.0?
  • Karissa_Clohan
    Karissa_Clohan Posts: 126 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    maybe some eye candy will help:

    300RiseOfAnEmpireSetPics040813_02wtmk.jpgwtmk.jpg.jpg
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    Have you considered an upgrade to boytoy 2.0?

    I would consider downgrading to beta to get away from this model.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.

    Equipment is so faulty I gave up that feature two years ago. Where's my f***ing warranty??
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    You don't need a warranty when you can recycle! Just recycle!!!
  • V0lver
    V0lver Posts: 915 Member
    If you need a place to sit, we have a guy for that here
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    You don't need a warranty when you can recycle! Just recycle!!!

    You mean chop him into pieces, rebuild him and give him away? Not only is that very frankenstein, I would never wish this torment on anyone else.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    You don't need a warranty when you can recycle! Just recycle!!!

    You mean chop him into pieces, rebuild him and give him away? Not only is that very frankenstein, I would never wish this torment on anyone else.
    Could just recycle a few.. Bodyparts.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    If you need a place to sit, we have a guy for that here

    He said "as long as i have a face" but his picture had no face. :frown:
  • Karissa_Clohan
    Karissa_Clohan Posts: 126 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.

    Equipment is so faulty I gave up that feature two years ago. Where's my f***ing warranty??

    That's where upgrades and extensions come in handy! :D

    In all seriousness though, if the meat ain't getting pounded... I'd be cranky as hell!
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    You don't need a warranty when you can recycle! Just recycle!!!

    You mean chop him into pieces, rebuild him and give him away? Not only is that very frankenstein, I would never wish this torment on anyone else.
    Could just recycle a few.. Bodyparts.

    i refuse to be the bride of frankenstein.
  • V0lver
    V0lver Posts: 915 Member
    If you need a place to sit, we have a guy for that here

    He said "as long as i have a face" but his picture had no face. :frown:

    You wont be looking at it anyways so...
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    You don't need a warranty when you can recycle! Just recycle!!!

    You mean chop him into pieces, rebuild him and give him away? Not only is that very frankenstein, I would never wish this torment on anyone else.
    Could just recycle a few.. Bodyparts.

    i refuse to be the bride of frankenstein.
    Fairy dust helps. I'll go catch Tinkerbell, shake some dust up for ya!
  • krawhitham
    krawhitham Posts: 831 Member
    Next time you're all sitting around the dinner table, with him and his family, and he belittles your weight loss, let out a big, loud, juicy fart... then say "I think I just lost 2 lbs with that one!"

    Jokes on him!
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.

    Equipment is so faulty I gave up that feature two years ago. Where's my f***ing warranty??
    I think you can legally return it under the lemon law at this point.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    Next time you're all sitting around the dinner table, with him and his family, and he belittles your weight loss, let out a big, loud, juicy fart... then say "I think I just lost 2 lbs with that one!"

    Jokes on him!

    if it clears the room i suppose problem solved. doesn't help with the upgrade though.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.

    Equipment is so faulty I gave up that feature two years ago. Where's my f***ing warranty??
    I think you can legally return it under the lemon law at this point.

    Good thing I saved my receipt.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    It's okay, OP
    Next time he attempts to initiate sexy time, belittle his efforts :) Remind him that he's not quite equipped with the appropriate hardware to get the job done without glitches.

    Equipment is so faulty I gave up that feature two years ago. Where's my f***ing warranty??

    That's where upgrades and extensions come in handy! :D

    In all seriousness though, if the meat ain't getting pounded... I'd be cranky as hell!

    ...yeeeeeaaaaaaahhh... :grumble:
  • kershaann
    kershaann Posts: 1,824 Member
    Have you heard of the mechanical boyfriend? I hear it doesn't talk back, never tells you no, an dyou can take batteries out at anytime.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    Have you heard of the mechanical boyfriend? I hear it doesn't talk back, never tells you no, an dyou can take batteries out at anytime.

    They generally lack good conversation ;)
  • jennpaulson
    jennpaulson Posts: 850 Member
    Have you heard of the mechanical boyfriend? I hear it doesn't talk back, never tells you no, an dyou can take batteries out at anytime.

    They generally lack good conversation ;)

    You just want everything don't you? ; ) Good conversation is what we're all here for : )
  • RachelSD7
    RachelSD7 Posts: 65 Member
    No one deserves to be belittled or laughed at/about. Is it possible that he's making these jokes due to an insecurity? You're doing so well, and he could be worried that you're going to slim down and ship out. There's no excuse for being a jerk, but sometimes there is a reason. Sometimes.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    No one deserves to be belittled or laughed at/about. Is it possible that he's making these jokes due to an insecurity? You're doing so well, and he could be worried that you're going to slim down and ship out. There's no excuse for being a jerk, but sometimes there is a reason. Sometimes.

    he is very insecure, yes.
  • siport
    siport Posts: 7,429 Member
    you could always get infected with some Mallware - and use his credit card to do some online shopping :-)
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
    you could always get infected with some Mallware - and use his credit card to do some online shopping :-)
    My malware is so good he personally hands me his credit card.
  • BigBellyGoAway
    BigBellyGoAway Posts: 781 Member
    First things first. Do you like Led Zeppelin? Do you get ingrown hairs when you shave? DO YOU EVEN LIFT?
  • FoxBean
    FoxBean Posts: 910 Member
    I'd suggest researching on how to properly train a husband ASAP, it's not too late!
  • actioncomics1
    actioncomics1 Posts: 58
    Old one has been buggy since the day I got him. Constantly spits out errors, never works right when I want him to, gets worse with every update...

    Specifically tonight he belittled my weight loss efforts in front of his entire family, and no one said a word.

    Can I get an upgrade?

    (Okay trolls, have fun. I really need the laugh tonight.)
    your pretty you will have no problem finding a new one

Categories