Mothers raising the next generation of fat kids

McCrabby

OP, you could benefit from reading this link http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

You can thank me later. :flowerforyou:

daubawauba

My opinion is you can feed your kids just about anything.. as long as you TEACH them healthy habits.. My children eat sweet sugary stuff, but they still know that when we sit down for dinner we will eat our veggies. They understand that its ok to snack but just not too much. and honestly sometimes when you are always talking about eating right and pushing it too hard that can also cause an eating disorder bc it can give them a complex.

This exactly! We always say "everything in moderation" on these forums, but somehow that shouldn't apply to our children?

Yagisama

I volunteered for a children's hospital for many years and this was one of the main issues faced by the health care providers. As one doctor put it, they spent most of their time trying to save the children from the parents.

The hospital staff would try to give the kids healthy food but the parents would visit and bring all sorts of chocolates and candy, which would include other kids in the hospital.

But chocolate and cake for babies? That, I had never seen before.

I'm sure it's a lot different when the child is in the hospital for medical issues. During such a time it is important for children to receive proper nutrition to promote healing, but this is not what OP is talking about. She is worried about other people's children instead of worrying about her own.

The issue wasn't just what they were eating in the hospital. It was that some of these kids were already 50lb+ overweight, and some were already diagnosed with diabetes. This was introducing extra complications toward their treatment. And then the doctors and nurses would see the parents feed the younger sibling chocolate and cake while the older sibling had severe weight related issues. Hence the common quote I heard that the doctors' main job is to save the patients from themselves.

Also, I don't see how worrying about other people's children and worrying about her own children is mutually exclusive. She can worry about both.

It all depends if you see health care and its related costs a problem of the individual(s) involved or a problem of society. Many countries' population health and healthcare are often compared to the US. One country that I have a lot of experience with is Japan. Japan has one of the highest life expectancy of the world and a very healthy (albeit aging) population, especially compared to the US.

There, for better or for worse, there is extensive social pressure for parents to make sure their children have a healthy lifestyle. Personally, I think there is too much social pressure to conform for the greater good and the social pressure includes a great deal of health related shaming. I think that's too much and brings about a host of other problems. But I don't see an issue about a rant where one parent comments about the perceived negative behavior of other parents. There's no need to take it personally.

That said, I think moderation, as always is very important. Like other posters here, I grew up in a very healthy, no fast food, etc environment. Unfortunately when I went to college, I went hog wild with the pizza and burgers and that was the start of my weight gain. So you really don't want to overdo it.

forkofpower

Stop being a sanctimommy. Mothers get judged enough for everything they do -- relax and just focus on your own kid.

doointhis4me

I volunteered for a children's hospital for many years and this was one of the main issues faced by the health care providers. As one doctor put it, they spent most of their time trying to save the children from the parents.

The hospital staff would try to give the kids healthy food but the parents would visit and bring all sorts of chocolates and candy, which would include other kids in the hospital.

But chocolate and cake for babies? That, I had never seen before.

I'm sure it's a lot different when the child is in the hospital for medical issues. During such a time it is important for children to receive proper nutrition to promote healing, but this is not what OP is talking about. She is worried about other people's children instead of worrying about her own.

The issue wasn't just what they were eating in the hospital. It was that some of these kids were already 50lb+ overweight, and some were already diagnosed with diabetes. This was introducing extra complications toward their treatment. And then the doctors and nurses would see the parents feed the younger sibling chocolate and cake while the older sibling had severe weight related issues. Hence the common quote I heard that the doctors' main job is to save the patients from themselves.

Also, I don't see how worrying about other people's children and worrying about her own children is mutually exclusive. She can worry about both.

It all depends if you see health care and its related costs a problem of the individual(s) involved or a problem of society. Many countries' population health and healthcare are often compared to the US. One country that I have a lot of experience with is Japan. Japan has one of the highest life expectancy of the world and a very healthy (albeit aging) population, especially compared to the US.

There, for better or for worse, there is extensive social pressure for parents to make sure their children have a healthy lifestyle. Personally, I think there is too much social pressure to conform for the greater good and the social pressure includes a great deal of health related shaming. I think that's too much and brings about a host of other problems. But I don't see an issue about a rant where one parent comments about the perceived negative behavior of other parents. There's no need to take it personally.

That said, I think moderation, as always is very important. Like other posters here, I grew up in a very healthy, no fast food, etc environment. Unfortunately when I went to college, I went hog wild with the pizza and burgers and that was the start of my weight gain. So you really don't want to overdo it.

I get what you are saying about healthcare.. I'm a nurse..what I am saying is that it is a bunch of crap for someone to post stuff about mothers feeding their children crap that is setting up the next generation of fat kids. If OP is so worried about it why doesn't she grow a pair and advocate for those children on her Facebook page instead of coming here and standing on her soap box..

Yagisama

Well, sometimes a rant is just a rant. I sometimes rant about companies' poor customer service or support and don't end up doing anything else since the rant was enough for me. That said maybe she already has a facebook page about this topic, but then again I'm not sure how a facebook page would change things here.

BunBun85

OP, you could benefit from reading this link http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

You can thank me later. :flowerforyou:

My thoughts exactly.

EricJonrosh

FACT - There will always be parents out there that should not be parents...for many reasons other than what they feed their kids (though, without a doubt, this can be concerning in some circumstances.) Unfortunately, these parents will never know who they are.

Some diets are better then others, but feeding a child a diet that does not conform to your ideals (generic you) does not make it a bad diet. Bad parents do know who they are, bad parents just don't care. That is why they are bad parents.

I agree with you 100%. my son is 18months and has never had chocolate or anything like that. he eats healthier then I do! Its always those mothers that try and justify it by saying oh my kid doesnt like veggies... that sounds more like a parenting problem to me!

Poor kid. chocolate is yummy.. I really really hope you did the smash cake for his 1st birthday. That's a rite of passage.. denying your kid treats such as chocolate just means he will eat a ton when mommy isn't around. sorry, but that's the plain truth of it. My son has never been restricted from eating treats (quantity was limited before though), and now he moderates himself.

Wow, I must be a terrible mother - I have a pic of my son on my Facebook with Nutella smeared all over his face...

Welcome to the club! *pulls up second chair* We have cookies here. :drinker:

We were raised without sugar cereal and pop, it was forbidden. Yes we sneaked it when we could but it never came close to what other kids had daily. And it showed. They grew up skinny, small and lethargic. Fast forward: my nephews were raised the opposite way (my brother had no say in it) and were given ice cream every night, 2-3x the calories of their dinners. Plus she bakes all the time. Unfortunately it shows in their size. The oldest is 18 now and is about a foot shorter than all his friends. His mother is a firm believer in "don't deny them treats" and so is her mother. I always knew when her parents were visiting because you walk in the house and the counter is covered in chips, soda, skittles, chocolate, cheap grocery store cupcakes and trash, and the kids were sprawled on the couch, in glycemic stupor. Sure chocolate is yummy, but that's no reason to give it to kids all the time. And I've never heard of the smash cake tradition - haha. That's why we have so much childhood obesity and diabetes. Our portions are out of control. Allergies are popping up all over. It's really sad. One of my nephews became a picky eater because he is addicted to sugar. He won't eat anything that doesn't taste like candy. Make a baloney sandwich and he'll cry in terror until his mom caves in and fixes him what he wants. Not happening.

CA_Underdog

You control entirely what goes into there mouths.

A pediatric nutritionist once told me, while you control what you offer them, they control what they eat.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with a daily grilled cheese sandwich. Cheese is a good source of calcium, something growing kids need. The best breads are low in calories and a good source of fiber.

PS - Us fathers have a say in the next generation of kids, too.

nlbez

Well im not some one that posts this pictures on facebook but my son is 19 months and eats chocolate and sweetie things but he also eats everything else that we eat to. Does this make me a bad mother?
Ever since we weaned him he just eats what we do its all about balance and moderation isnt it?
He has a healthy breakfast, a healthy lunch, a homemade dinner with snacks inbetween which could be biscuits, chocolate or fruit. He will have the odd take away like we do.
Hes never eaten baby foods from a tub or jar but i dont judge people that feed there babies thats stuff its there choice.

Confuzzled4ever

FACT - There will always be parents out there that should not be parents...for many reasons other than what they feed their kids (though, without a doubt, this can be concerning in some circumstances.) Unfortunately, these parents will never know who they are.

Some diets are better then others, but feeding a child a diet that does not conform to your ideals (generic you) does not make it a bad diet. Bad parents do know who they are, bad parents just don't care. That is why they are bad parents.

I agree with you 100%. my son is 18months and has never had chocolate or anything like that. he eats healthier then I do! Its always those mothers that try and justify it by saying oh my kid doesnt like veggies... that sounds more like a parenting problem to me!

Poor kid. chocolate is yummy.. I really really hope you did the smash cake for his 1st birthday. That's a rite of passage.. denying your kid treats such as chocolate just means he will eat a ton when mommy isn't around. sorry, but that's the plain truth of it. My son has never been restricted from eating treats (quantity was limited before though), and now he moderates himself.

Wow, I must be a terrible mother - I have a pic of my son on my Facebook with Nutella smeared all over his face...

Welcome to the club! *pulls up second chair* We have cookies here. :drinker:

We were raised without sugar cereal and pop, it was forbidden. Yes we sneaked it when we could but it never came close to what other kids had daily. And it showed. They grew up skinny, small and lethargic. Fast forward: my nephews were raised the opposite way (my brother had no say in it) and were given ice cream every night, 2-3x the calories of their dinners. Plus she bakes all the time. Unfortunately it shows in their size. The oldest is 18 now and is about a foot shorter than all his friends. His mother is a firm believer in "don't deny them treats" and so is her mother. I always knew when her parents were visiting because you walk in the house and the counter is covered in chips, soda, skittles, chocolate, cheap grocery store cupcakes and trash, and the kids were sprawled on the couch, in glycemic stupor. Sure chocolate is yummy, but that's no reason to give it to kids all the time. And I've never heard of the smash cake tradition - haha. That's why we have so much childhood obesity and diabetes. Our portions are out of control. Allergies are popping up all over. It's really sad. One of my nephews became a picky eater because he is addicted to sugar. He won't eat anything that doesn't taste like candy. Make a baloney sandwich and he'll cry in terror until his mom caves in and fixes him what he wants. Not happening.

The smash cake is a little cake you give to a one year old on their birthday so they can eat with their fingers, and not ruin cake for everyone else. It mostly ends up on their face and in their hair. They eat very little of it. Hence why it's called a smash cake.

Don't get me wrong.. I am not a fan of sugar. I hate the way too much sugar affect me and my son.. I cut out as much added sugar as I can. But to say that people who give their kids sugar or treats are bad parents is ludicrous. If the kids eat nothing but, then the parents are poor nutritionists, not bad parents. There is nothing wrong with having and giving the kids treats.. even young ones. There is a line where it's probably not nutritionally sound to do so, but that doesn't make you a bad parent or indicate that you don't care for your kids. I raised my son eating all that stuff and he's thin, healthy and full of energy. He's never been fat. You think sweets stunted their growth?? that's interesting. I have never looked into that correlation..

no.. eating sweets is not why we have an obesity problem. Over eating in general is why we have an obesity problem. Allergies are not popping up all over because people eat too much or too may sweets as children. Allergies occur for an entirely different reason.

While i'm not a fan of added sugars, i'm also realistic about it.

Mrsbeale11

Your peek at people is only a peek. You can't assume the entire diet of a child based on goofy Facebook updates or a family dining out. Focus on your kid/kids and stop expending so much emotional energy on something that isn't within your control and, frankly, not your business.

This!!!!!!!

ldnmaggie

Get over it? Need abit of everything I say ... They are CHILDREN let em live and not obsess over diet.

SkimFlatWhite68

Meanwhile, someone, somewhere is having an actual problem.

This..

Or improving their grammar.

2BeHappy2

[/quote]
We were raised without sugar cereal and pop, it was forbidden. Yes we sneaked it when we could but it never came close to what other kids had daily. And it showed. They grew up skinny, small and lethargic. Fast forward: my nephews were raised the opposite way (my brother had no say in it) and were given ice cream every night, 2-3x the calories of their dinners. Plus she bakes all the time. Unfortunately it shows in their size. The oldest is 18 now and is about a foot shorter than all his friends. His mother is a firm believer in "don't deny them treats" and so is her mother. I always knew when her parents were visiting because you walk in the house and the counter is covered in chips, soda, skittles, chocolate, cheap grocery store cupcakes and trash, and the kids were sprawled on the couch, in glycemic stupor. Sure chocolate is yummy, but that's no reason to give it to kids all the time. And I've never heard of the smash cake tradition - haha. That's why we have so much childhood obesity and diabetes. Our portions are out of control. Allergies are popping up all over. It's really sad. One of my nephews became a picky eater because he is addicted to sugar. He won't eat anything that doesn't taste like candy. Make a baloney sandwich and he'll cry in terror until his mom caves in and fixes him what he wants. Not happening.
[/quote]

Years ago while eating w/ some friends, their child was just a few months old and I saw him taking sugar and smearing it on her gums...I was shocked!
He laughed like it was funny & used the excuse that she was teething...he could've found other ways of helping the child with that problem.
I've had many kids come through my home and were picky about eating good food because at their house they get greasy, high caloric foods and then want to know whats for dessert :noway:
For example: Taco salads/bowls is well balanced...even making a buffet of different toppings.
Baked potatoes, same concept as above...using different toppings.
Sometimes people really do have/get an I don't care kind of air or attitude because other things are on a higher priority chart for them & sometimes that's at the expense of the child(ren).
I cared for my friends daughters for 1 yr, that next yr when the oldest was 12 and the youngest was 5, instead of paying me the $20 for 2nd shift (yes, I was charging that much because although she worked at a good job, she was still a single parent), she started to let them stay home.
She said she was too tired to pick them up after work so she was ok with this.
Not knowing what a 12 yr old was cooking up to eat, I stopped over there and she said "Mom leaves us $20 every day for us to order out."
Not only were the girls safe with us but they had a home cooked meal at our house.
She now has 3 girls and the middle & younger 1 are pretty big for their height/age.
Lets just say that theyre even particular about what kind of candy/junk they like!
If you don't have what they like then they whine, cry, complain etc till they get what their pallets have become accustomed to.
It really is sad...then Ive had other parents say "Johnny came home & said he had a baked potato with broccoli on it, how did you get him to eat it?"
Or "Susy said she had chili but at home she refuses to eat chili with beans and will only let me buy chili with no beans."
Because they got to add whatever toppings (cheese, sour cream, crackers etc) to make it her own!
Kids are more willing to eat/try new/different/good/healthy things when it's more in their control of choice.
Cheese in moderation is good which my husband doesn't care for cauliflower but sprinkle a little parmesan on it and he's as happy as a lark!

2BeHappy2

We were raised without sugar cereal and pop, it was forbidden. Yes we sneaked it when we could but it never came close to what other kids had daily. And it showed. They grew up skinny, small and lethargic. Fast forward: my nephews were raised the opposite way (my brother had no say in it) and were given ice cream every night, 2-3x the calories of their dinners. Plus she bakes all the time. Unfortunately it shows in their size. The oldest is 18 now and is about a foot shorter than all his friends. His mother is a firm believer in "don't deny them treats" and so is her mother. I always knew when her parents were visiting because you walk in the house and the counter is covered in chips, soda, skittles, chocolate, cheap grocery store cupcakes and trash, and the kids were sprawled on the couch, in glycemic stupor. Sure chocolate is yummy, but that's no reason to give it to kids all the time. And I've never heard of the smash cake tradition - haha. That's why we have so much childhood obesity and diabetes. Our portions are out of control. Allergies are popping up all over. It's really sad. One of my nephews became a picky eater because he is addicted to sugar. He won't eat anything that doesn't taste like candy. Make a baloney sandwich and he'll cry in terror until his mom caves in and fixes him what he wants. Not happening.
[/quote]


Sorry about that...the top part was a quote from someone else but I guess I went back too far!
Hope this doesn't confuse everyone....

Elsie_Brownraisin

Should this even be on this forum? Its about its members reaching their goals, not about parenting...

Ah, but once you have reduced in mass, you become an expert in any given topic and assume the whole world wants to hear what you think about it.

I couldn't give a toss what people think, I'm a bad parent for allowing my son to chocolate and biscuit and an even worse one for letting him play his DS or read a comic at the table in restaurants whilst waiting for the food. There are reasons for this that cannot be discerned by a judgemental stranger at first glance.

Also, his father has a large role to play in making my son into a weeble (apparently), even if he weren't a stay at home Dad.

SezxyStef

Yes i am considered the mean parent because I don't my 'BABY' chocolate and cake and other cr*p like that. I will definitely perfectly fine with him having the odd chocolate bar when he is school aged, and has already ate all his vegies on his plate. And as for the people saying it could only be an every now an than thing on facebook. You are forgetting I am friends with these people, and they put these pics up 'EVERYDAY'! and my son is not under weight, or over weight. He is aloud to eat until he is full, just only healthy foods.

ah your one of those...

My son had cereal and apple sauce before he turned a year old..and apple juice diluted...

He love grilled cheese and chicken fingers and French fries and nuggets growing up...

He is not obese...imagine that...

eating till he's full, why not stop him at satisfied? why wait till he is stuffed? that leads to obesisty and an unhealthy relationship with food, oh btw so does deprivation.

Oh and making him clean his plate...see now we can call you the "clean plate police" which we all know causes issues later in life...

2x your age and raised my own trust me girly you got some stuff to learn...

paperpudding

I complete agree, it makes me want to scream. Hubby's families thought I was crazy when

I wouldn't put cordial/soda/rice cereal in my daughters bottles
Delayed solids until 7-8months
Wouldn't give them Mcdoanlds before 5
They only snacks they can have is fruit/veggie sticks/nuts

My 2 girls are the only kids without weight problems in his whole family!!

Other than no 1, because my children were breast fed and did not have bottles as little babies, they did all the rest.
Started solids at 4- 5 months, had Mcdonalds and similar before age 5, had snacks other than fruit/veggies/nuts.

They are all grown adults now and amazingly, none are overweight!!

Incidentally I also have an old photo of myself covered in ice cream at age 9 months.
I suppose this could of caused myself to be overweight as an adult - but given I did not creep into the overweight category until about age 35, I would have to say the link seems somewhat tenuous.

paperpudding

Yep. People look at me like I'm committing child abuse when I tell my son he can't have something because it isn't healthy. It's pathetic that the worst foods are traditionally considered kids foods. Just look at a restaurant's Kid's Mens: Grilled Cheese, Hamburger, chicken tenders, all with fries. My son has friends who are getting fat and they are just kids. Instead of people seeing it as a problem, people just figure that they are kids and will grow, but they won't grow out of it when they are adults and it can't be the most healthy lifestyle. For anyone who does care; don't get your child food treats, as rewards, or as comforts (like ice cream on a bad day, or pizza after a sports win). This just teaches them habits that they may spend years trying to break.

Kids menus in restaurants is a silly comparison - nobody eats at restaurants all the time.

But Just like adults might have a tasty indulgent meal at a restaurant, so can children.

And children don't have to order from the kids menu anyway - you can order an entrée for them as their meal or share your meal with them or ask for salad instead of fries etc etc.

I'm not fussed by food as a reward either - as long as the overall food is within normal amounts, this is fine to me.

I reward myself with food sometimes.