Should I be offended?

Deipneus

I would be grossed out, but probably not offended. Most men seriously just think of it as a normal bodily function (which it is), and just let it rip wherever they at no matter who they're around.

Umm, no. Stereotypes are to be avoided as are loud farts at work.

Either the OP was the victim of a practical joke others were in on, in which case they all need to tell her, or this guy has a screw loose. Seriously, if this is his normal behavior, he will do other weird things and get fired eventuallly.

wonderwoman234

I am lovin' this thread! Too, too funny! There are many people with a really active (cynical?) imagination!

I would make sure you know what his intentions were before you make any complaints. He would have to be a complete nut job to purposely challenge you on his first day, not knowing you at all, by farting on purpose in your office.

My guess is he could not control his gas and was mortified and left and that the donut was a peace offering.

Time will tell, Tupperware Lady!

Valrotha

Go #2 on his desk, and maintain eye contact while you're doing it. Then, see if he wants to escalate things from there. If he does, get in touch and I'll come up with more ideas.

Joking aside, I have no idea why someone would do that if they didn't know you really well, and even then it's highly questionable. I'd make sure people in a position of authority know about that. It could be in indication of a much more severe personality disorder other than *kitten* Personality Disorder.

Kimdbro

I can just imagine somewhere else on the internet:


"OMG I can't believe what I did.... so stupid... I was at my new job chatting to this hot young chick who worked there, and the bean curry I ate the previous decided to wreak havoc in my gut... I was pretty sure I could sneak one out silently, but it came out so loud and I even sharted a little bit.... I tried to play it cool, like it had all been a big joke, but I really had to go to the bathroom, so I kind of just pretended like I wasn't about to make a mad dash for the bathroom and then when I was far enough away that she couldn't see me, I dashed to the bathroom.

The next day I bought her a donut, well, I don't know why really.... I suppose I was just trying to pretend like nothing had happened... but she was looking at me like I was some kind of crazy half-wit.... "

My first thoughts were something along this line.

agreed, there are moments in life that are so messed up, sometimes the only thing you can do....is walk away \m/

^^ All of this. He's probably mortified, but what do ya do?? Buy the girl a donut I guess. lol. I really hope to get an update on future interactions of this guy.

Cliffslosinit

I just hope the doughnut was wrapped up!

kinkyslinky16

He's a sales guy, they are all a little quirky. He's just playing the fart game with you. Sounds like you need to raise the ante. Ball is in your court.

My thoughts exactly.
Queef in his office, then bring him a croissant the next day.

I. love. it. :laugh: :flowerforyou:

andibenoit

Why has nobody suggested a whoopee cushion on his chair, and a doughnut on his desk?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was thinking this.

Alluminati

I just hope the doughnut was wrapped up!

yuk doo doo

Lobster1987

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Is this for real!?

MissNayMalmoe

I have to get something off my chest.

I have a desk job in the compliance department of an asphalt company. I have my own office, the first one you walk by when you enter the building. We recently had a new employee in our sales department come around and introduce himself about a week ago. I was just sitting in my office, innocently pretending to be working incredibly hard. This guy comes in and says "Hi, I am Jeff. I am the new sales head, I heard that I come to you if I need a translator. Nice to meet you." Normal enough. We start talking about the last place he worked, and he made a joke about me being our minority haul (I am the youngest by far, the only Hispanic in the office, and the only girl). Right in the middle of our conversation, he stops talking and farts. Not just a little one. But he enthusiastically pushes out a four or five second long fart, all the while staring me right in the eyes. He then immediately walks out of my office. No, "I am sorry." "Excuse me." or "haha milk was a bad choice." He just leaves. I am left with this horrible fart stench, couldn't even finish my coffee.

I sat in my office for awhile, wondering what the hell just happened. Did the best prank ever just get pulled on me? Was it an accident? Was he embarrassed? Why did he look me in the eyes, oh God why didn't he break eye contact? I wanted to laugh, but I am genuinely a little offended. That was MY office, my smell domain. I don't go into his office, vomit, then leave.

Anyway, he came to me today and brought me a donut. No idea why. I didn't ask for one. No one else in the department was given any. Now I am so incredibly confused. Was this to atone for his fart? Is he screwing with my brain? I just want to know! I have never even thought this would ever be a scenario I have to navigate. What is this?

Mikki, I am going to share a story with you I have never told anyone else. I frequented a farm a few years back that had the absolute most beautiful man working there I had ever seen. We passed each other between barns and he asked how I was liking the farm. As my eyes met his I felt as though I was diving into a pool of cotton and being whisked away by angels.
Trumpets were sounding in the background, which seemed odd; "don't angels play harps?" I asked myself...

It was then, dear Mikki, that I realized I had lost all control of my sphincter. There were no trumpets, just my wailing rectum. Paralyzed by the humiliation of what was occurring, I stared at him square in the face while it just. kept. going. It was the single most colossal gust of wind ever to escape my bowels and it happened in front of the most breathtaking man I had ever laid eyes on. Concern for his safety began to arise as I polluted the air around us.

When everything was over, we just stood there for a second, trying to make sense of what had happened. I mentally cursed my *kitten* for its utter betrayal and simply soldiered on about my farm visit.

I didn't bring him a donut atonement, but we did end up becoming friends later on.

StacyRenee77

I have to get something off my chest.

I have a desk job in the compliance department of an asphalt company. I have my own office, the first one you walk by when you enter the building. We recently had a new employee in our sales department come around and introduce himself about a week ago. I was just sitting in my office, innocently pretending to be working incredibly hard. This guy comes in and says "Hi, I am Jeff. I am the new sales head, I heard that I come to you if I need a translator. Nice to meet you." Normal enough. We start talking about the last place he worked, and he made a joke about me being our minority haul (I am the youngest by far, the only Hispanic in the office, and the only girl). Right in the middle of our conversation, he stops talking and farts. Not just a little one. But he enthusiastically pushes out a four or five second long fart, all the while staring me right in the eyes. He then immediately walks out of my office. No, "I am sorry." "Excuse me." or "haha milk was a bad choice." He just leaves. I am left with this horrible fart stench, couldn't even finish my coffee.

I sat in my office for awhile, wondering what the hell just happened. Did the best prank ever just get pulled on me? Was it an accident? Was he embarrassed? Why did he look me in the eyes, oh God why didn't he break eye contact? I wanted to laugh, but I am genuinely a little offended. That was MY office, my smell domain. I don't go into his office, vomit, then leave.

Anyway, he came to me today and brought me a donut. No idea why. I didn't ask for one. No one else in the department was given any. Now I am so incredibly confused. Was this to atone for his fart? Is he screwing with my brain? I just want to know! I have never even thought this would ever be a scenario I have to navigate. What is this?

Mikki, I am going to share a story with you I have never told anyone else. I frequented a farm a few years back that had the absolute most beautiful man working there I had ever seen. We passed each other between barns and he asked how I was liking the farm. As my eyes met his I felt as though I was diving into a pool of cotton and being whisked away by angels.
Trumpets were sounding in the background, which seemed odd; don't they play harps?

It was then, dear Mikki, that I realized I had lost all control of my sphincter. There were no trumpets, just my wailing rectum. Paralyzed by the humiliation of what was occurring, I stared at him square in the face while it just. kept going. It was the single most colossal gust of wind ever to escape my bowels and it happened in front of the most breathtaking man I had ever laid eyes on. When everything was over, we just stood there for a second, trying to make sense of what had happened. I mentally cursed my *kitten* for its utter betrayal and simply soldiered on about my farm visit.

I didn't bring him a donut atonement, but we did end up becoming friends later on.

omg, I about pissed my pants

Mikkimeow

I have to get something off my chest.

I have a desk job in the compliance department of an asphalt company. I have my own office, the first one you walk by when you enter the building. We recently had a new employee in our sales department come around and introduce himself about a week ago. I was just sitting in my office, innocently pretending to be working incredibly hard. This guy comes in and says "Hi, I am Jeff. I am the new sales head, I heard that I come to you if I need a translator. Nice to meet you." Normal enough. We start talking about the last place he worked, and he made a joke about me being our minority haul (I am the youngest by far, the only Hispanic in the office, and the only girl). Right in the middle of our conversation, he stops talking and farts. Not just a little one. But he enthusiastically pushes out a four or five second long fart, all the while staring me right in the eyes. He then immediately walks out of my office. No, "I am sorry." "Excuse me." or "haha milk was a bad choice." He just leaves. I am left with this horrible fart stench, couldn't even finish my coffee.

I sat in my office for awhile, wondering what the hell just happened. Did the best prank ever just get pulled on me? Was it an accident? Was he embarrassed? Why did he look me in the eyes, oh God why didn't he break eye contact? I wanted to laugh, but I am genuinely a little offended. That was MY office, my smell domain. I don't go into his office, vomit, then leave.

Anyway, he came to me today and brought me a donut. No idea why. I didn't ask for one. No one else in the department was given any. Now I am so incredibly confused. Was this to atone for his fart? Is he screwing with my brain? I just want to know! I have never even thought this would ever be a scenario I have to navigate. What is this?

Mikki, I am going to share a story with you I have never told anyone else. I frequented a farm a few years back that had the absolute most beautiful man working there I had ever seen. We passed each other between barns and he asked how I was liking the farm. As my eyes met his I felt as though I was diving into a pool of cotton and being whisked away by angels.
Trumpets were sounding in the background, which seemed odd; "don't angels play harps?" I asked myself...

It was then, dear Mikki, that I realized I had lost all control of my sphincter. There were no trumpets, just my wailing rectum. Paralyzed by the humiliation of what was occurring, I stared at him square in the face while it just. kept. going. It was the single most colossal gust of wind ever to escape my bowels and it happened in front of the most breathtaking man I had ever laid eyes on. Concern for his safety began to arise as I polluted the air around us.

When everything was over, we just stood there for a second, trying to make sense of what had happened. I mentally cursed my *kitten* for its utter betrayal and simply soldiered on about my farm visit.

I didn't bring him a donut atonement, but we did end up becoming friends later on.

Oh my God. No. That is so funny. Maybe it is universal to not break eye contact when you are doing a horrifyingly embarrassing act.

Booksandbeaches

Mikki, I am going to share a story with you I have never told anyone else. I frequented a farm a few years back that had the absolute most beautiful man working there I had ever seen. We passed each other between barns and he asked how I was liking the farm. As my eyes met his I felt as though I was diving into a pool of cotton and being whisked away by angels.
Trumpets were sounding in the background, which seemed odd; "don't angels play harps?" I asked myself...

It was then, dear Mikki, that I realized I had lost all control of my sphincter. There were no trumpets, just my wailing rectum. Paralyzed by the humiliation of what was occurring, I stared at him square in the face while it just. kept. going. It was the single most colossal gust of wind ever to escape my bowels and it happened in front of the most breathtaking man I had ever laid eyes on. Concern for his safety began to arise as I polluted the air around us.

When everything was over, we just stood there for a second, trying to make sense of what had happened. I mentally cursed my *kitten* for its utter betrayal and simply soldiered on about my farm visit.

I didn't bring him a donut atonement, but we did end up becoming friends later on.

OMG! *dying* :laugh:

Sehkmet_x

smhcampbell23

As a non-minority female who was the Operations Manager of a construction company, the problem is my friend, that you work at an Asphalt company. Men in the field tend to treat women like other men in the field and forget, that although we are quite capable of handling ourselves, we are still ladies and there are some boundaries. After 3 years in the business I had heard and seen more than most women at normal jobs ever will. It's the business, you'll find more like your salesman than not, it's unfortunate but it definitely perpetuates the stereotypes!

smhcampbell23

Why has nobody suggested a whoopee cushion on his chair, and a doughnut on his desk?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was thinking this.

Please do this... just do it!

bloodyhonest

redversustheblue

I have to get something off my chest.

I have a desk job in the compliance department of an asphalt company. I have my own office, the first one you walk by when you enter the building. We recently had a new employee in our sales department come around and introduce himself about a week ago. I was just sitting in my office, innocently pretending to be working incredibly hard. This guy comes in and says "Hi, I am Jeff. I am the new sales head, I heard that I come to you if I need a translator. Nice to meet you." Normal enough. We start talking about the last place he worked, and he made a joke about me being our minority haul (I am the youngest by far, the only Hispanic in the office, and the only girl). Right in the middle of our conversation, he stops talking and farts. Not just a little one. But he enthusiastically pushes out a four or five second long fart, all the while staring me right in the eyes. He then immediately walks out of my office. No, "I am sorry." "Excuse me." or "haha milk was a bad choice." He just leaves. I am left with this horrible fart stench, couldn't even finish my coffee.

I sat in my office for awhile, wondering what the hell just happened. Did the best prank ever just get pulled on me? Was it an accident? Was he embarrassed? Why did he look me in the eyes, oh God why didn't he break eye contact? I wanted to laugh, but I am genuinely a little offended. That was MY office, my smell domain. I don't go into his office, vomit, then leave.

Anyway, he came to me today and brought me a donut. No idea why. I didn't ask for one. No one else in the department was given any. Now I am so incredibly confused. Was this to atone for his fart? Is he screwing with my brain? I just want to know! I have never even thought this would ever be a scenario I have to navigate. What is this?

Mikki, I am going to share a story with you I have never told anyone else. I frequented a farm a few years back that had the absolute most beautiful man working there I had ever seen. We passed each other between barns and he asked how I was liking the farm. As my eyes met his I felt as though I was diving into a pool of cotton and being whisked away by angels.
Trumpets were sounding in the background, which seemed odd; "don't angels play harps?" I asked myself...

It was then, dear Mikki, that I realized I had lost all control of my sphincter. There were no trumpets, just my wailing rectum. Paralyzed by the humiliation of what was occurring, I stared at him square in the face while it just. kept. going. It was the single most colossal gust of wind ever to escape my bowels and it happened in front of the most breathtaking man I had ever laid eyes on. Concern for his safety began to arise as I polluted the air around us.

When everything was over, we just stood there for a second, trying to make sense of what had happened. I mentally cursed my *kitten* for its utter betrayal and simply soldiered on about my farm visit.

I didn't bring him a donut atonement, but we did end up becoming friends later on.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Bebubble

This guy for what ever the reason is a odd-ball. Accidentally letting one lose then not say anything. Then bring a donut! Or if it is joke and still not to saying anything. On both accounts that is flat out grade A "ODD". I would complain and have them find out what happened. Not you. He hasn't volunteered any info yet. He is just sitting back waiting to see what your next move will be. And if it nothing he will push it farther. You don't want to be subject to more odd behavior. And it seems like he thinks for what ever reason your fair game.

CAC10456

I think he was trying to make small talk and be funny (but it came out the wrong way) and he was so nervous he farted. I think he had an accident, kept looking you in the eye because he needed to see if you would laugh or react (both would've destroyed him), and he didn't say anything because he was so incredibly embarrassed. He is the new guy and wanted to make an impression. He gave you a doughnut without words because he is still incredibly embarrassed and wanted to say sorry.

That's what I would think of it. I commend you for not rolling on the floor laughing in his face...like I most likely would've (unfortunately) done.

I agree completely. I am laughing so hard over this thread.